The Anatomy Of A Synchronicity

It is so personal, the synchronicity, isn’t it? Try explaining the synchronicity that you had that blew your mind to someone, and you often get a less-than satisfying realization about just how personal these events are. You really really needed to “be there” for sure.

Since Carl Jung helped to bring the subject into popular awareness with his coining of the term and even describing some of his impossible events that he filed under the term synchronicity, we have become fascinated with what these events are all about.  I have been observing them now for years and at a particular point in my awakening when energy was at its highest, I was able to observe how synchronicties were happening all over the place, some on the order of one every few minutes.  I saw how synchronicity appeared to be tied to the level of the energy. No one was talking about this, and it led me to digging into the subject more to see what I could find.

I began by reading Carl Jung’s book on the subject. What I found was that Jung appeared to not make any correlations with our ability to possibly involve our own psychic energy in events, which brings about the synchronistic event. Jung’s work was carefully observant, but it also stopped short of calling it what I thought it was, which is a kind of collaborative event. Just the idea that thoughts could effect events is itself a huge discovery for any researcher, right?

The nature of a synchronicity is its relevance to you, and how private the meaning is. It is private because as is so often the case, the meaning of an event exists in the fact you have not told anyone about the thought that the event is tied to. It is often utterly private in nature, which of course is what makes all of this happening in the way that it does, so uncanny, so exciting, and so utterly amazing. It can seem as though the world of events or the universe is somehow able to read your mind, or that your thoughts get projected into events that then come back to you….. like a boomerang. It is as if the universe got sentient for a moment and began communicating to you through events.  Is it possible that the universe is actually sentient so that what I just said isn’t far-fetched, but very possibly the case?

It is widely known that awakenings and synchronicities are correlated. As a person who has experienced awakening, I am very interested in understanding the phenomenon better from observable phenomenon (not merely speculation). Sometimes when we see two things together we want to draw a correlation to them, but sometimes we can wind up drawing the wrong one. In social science there is this lesson I was taught when taking sociology courses in college. The caution goes like this: a researcher is looking into house fires and sees that fire trucks are almost always present during house fires so the researcher surmizes that fire trucks are what’s causing the house fires.

Synchronicities, in my observation, happen when we are aligned to the energy we call kundalini. The more prana we have, the more these events happen.  This is one important data point I would like to pass on to you. I found that I could chart the rise and fall of synchronicity as the energy rose and fell in my own private experience.  It led me to suspect that there was a relationship between prana and the synchronistic event (besides the fact that those who awaken begin experiencing them all over the place). My observation is that prana (which is precisely what kundalini is) amplifies thought so that these significant thoughts get materialized quickly.

I have found that there is something really important in terms of how synchronicity is related to our own energy fields. The more (energy) we have, the more synchronicities occur. In fact, the stronger the energy, the more rapidly they have come. Let me point out that there was a period of time when I was having extraordinarily powerful energy flow, and that the energy reached such a pitch that I was tingling, vibrating in an overt way. It was when the energy reached this unusualy high level that I noticed that synchronicities were correspondingly higher. This was a noticed and repeated event. I was able to see how synchronicities dropped off just as the energy calmed down. I observed this over many months and scores of times.

My observation has been that events of all kinds come to quicker manifestation once the threads of self are touched by awakening (or by more prana or chi). I will admit to you that for a very long time I had this sense ever since I was young that the more energy that we could realize in our consciousness, the more our reality would appear to change or be impacted by this energy. Maybe it was so ething I learned from another lifetime, but it certainly was there ever since I was very small (age three for certain). Long before my awakening I noticed that whenever I got in this groove where I was in touch with my innermost self and there was an uninterupted flow of unusually high psychic energy, events had this uncanny quality about them. I thought of it as being in a magic zone where events happened more in accord with what was in my mind. It also felt effortless and that the events that happened would come to me and bring me things that were most needed in my life at the time. This was so clear to me that I began meditating because of it, developing a method of meditating that involved feeling my energy (because feeling my energy put me close to it in awareness and also because this also led to the energy increasing). I used this method for years, right up until awakening came, during which time I practiced a new meditation method thathelped push me over the edgeinto awakening.

As we align to our inner energetic potential, I think that the twin energies that make up prana (and by extension kundalini) increases  and they serve each of us as engines of creation. Sound prosaic? I don’t think it is at all. In fact, the more aligned the twin energies of the yin and yang were in me, the stronger the incidence of synchronicity was for me. And what is synchronicity but a significant event that comes to you that is tied to something meaningful (maybe you were thinking about something on a given topic one moment only to have it rise up couched in the context of an event in your life over which you had no involvement….its just happening to you, around you, but certainly completely outside of your control).

Now I will indulge in something, take it for what you will, but it too is based on my own observation from early awakening. This is that prana or qi is a creative energy. This creative energy is expressed not in narrow terms in consciousness, but is expressed throughout the organism such that we can see its effects. It stimulates the body to help heal it physically, it increases sexual energy (a way to create in the physical by making babies), and it also increases creative energy as we normally think of it manyfold. We like to think of sexual energy as all by itself. In my meditations when I go to its root, I find that sexual energy and all other forms of creativity return or emerge from the same source, and they spread widely, being translated into different channels but still riotously orgasmic and blissful when felt in abundance. This is a great primordial energy that feels as though it exists at a much deeper level or a foundational layer within the field of awareness that makes up a vast entity that I suppose one could call God or the Tao.

The nature of this force has suggested to me that our world is alive with creative energy, and that we create our reality moment by moment based on our beliefs about what that reality is or should look like. I also have found that the more narrow your beliefs are about life, the fewer possibilities can be created. In awakening it is possible to drop what you previously believed as truth to become more open to the possibilities. What happens when you reach a point where anything is possible?

What I am here to tell you is that the anatomy of synchronicity is that synchronicity is part of our creative potential as human beings. Synchronicity is showing you a very novel facet of your own ability to manifest. Here you are, sitting there, and it just comes to you, and you are not controlling it at all. Most are focused on how wild that is. “How could that have happened?” you think. But do you stop to consider that the power behind synchronicity is actually way more, that you can use it to find fulfillment in your life? I observe that synchronicity is fueled by the energies within us, and if something is wanted or thought about clearly and strongly enough, it comes to fruition and that can happen in minutes (as was the case for me many times).

In writing this piece I used an example of how a synchronicity came in three events, all with the same message about a french philosopher Tielhard De Chardin whose ideas were similar to my own. I was actually guided by a series of synchronicities to help resolve what the main thesis of a book I was writing should be about. The story of how it unfolded was hard to believe except that it happened, and in doing so, it was like the universe showing me that all of this is just the tip of a still larger reality-we are only just now learning it seems to tune that other reality into our lives, this creative aspect which is inhibited by our shame but unleashed by our willingnness to embrace the orgasmic bliss that it brings.

namasté

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The Dopamine Link

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that is formed from the amino acid tyrosine. It is linked to movement and reward, according to researchers. I think it is interesting to read what science thinks it knows with what I have observed in my own body as a result of self-identifying the flush of dopamine in my body as a consequence or symptom of awakening.

You heard that right; self identifying dopamine in my body as the result of awakening. Really, it wasn’t that hard. I asked myself what this feeling was and what kind of chemistry was causing it. I gathered my symptoms and how this state felt, assuming that it had a chemical component, and I went online and found the “culprit” within five minutes. Simple. I of course did more reading to make sure I wasn’t missing something, but it all led back to dopamine as the central player. There are other compounds that are important (oxytocin, for another) but none quite so important to my mind (and experience) than dopamine. So rewind to my initial awakening, the first year…..

Six months into awakening and I am feeling this incredible chemical cocktail. It has numerous facets, and right away I consider that I am feeling more than one compound that is supporting a very cosmic level of consciousness. I have been a careful observer and there was one compound that remained after the initial “three year burn” took place, that period often identified as a sustained peak experience of high levels of a number of key chemical compounds all impacting consciousness. Chief among these, I found, was dopamine.

I identified dopamine early on in the process. What compound makes you feel blissed-out, cuts pain, and drops worry and fear? That’s right; dopamine.

I credit high dopamine levels with my ability to drop Pain Body as well as stored trauma. It also made the process of transformation a lot easier once I learned how to keep a steady flow of dopamine production going in my body. And yes, you can learn how to do this in your practice. Since we live in a world dominated by the idea promulgated by the pharmaceutical industry that the only way to change your physiology is to pop a pill, it us hard for someone like me to state that the body can and will produce any spectrum of compounds you “tell” it to produce without the need of external aides. There is a mechanism in the body that links thought and chemistry together such that the body will react to what the mind tells it.

To get the body to react to thought, it’s useful to know that the body doesn’t react to just ANY sort of thought. The body reacts most immediately to feelings, or thought that is backed by a strong level of feeling. In some cases we call this emotion, but this can be quite subtle and maybe not seen as emotion, even though it is. Now this can be dominated by strong emotions like fear, in which case norepinephrine and adrenaline will be produced, suffusing the body in a feeling of flight or fight edginess. The opposite range of our chemistry can be emphasized, which is the dopamine spectrum and this occurs as a result of an ability to let go, and to surrender. This isn’t easy to achieve in the beginning when most often the self is still dealing with an overburden of stored fear in the body. Busy with producing adrenaline, it gets hard to realize that dreamy bliss is even possible at this stage in the process.

The Advantages

Dopamine can be extremely beneficial in helping speed you to a place where you are less prone to micromanaging every aspect of your life and others. It aids in letting go of fear, and it allows the Dark Night experience to pass much easier. It can also lead to “spaciness” and trouble keeping focused on tasks. Dopamine is responsible for being blissed-out, so when we say dopamine, we are talking about a chemical spectrum that in the pharmaceutical world corresponds to opiods or painkillers. Knowing this, it is easy to see that dopamine makes it easier to deal with pain of all kinds, both physical and emotional. What I found from the experience was dopamine doesn’t kill pain….at all…what it does is it makes it so you just don’t mind or pay attention to the pain. This means that dopamine can decouple you from your recursive psychological pain (that manifests as hot button issues or trigger issues).

There is also evidence in my own work that once you begin initiating states of mind (unitive rather than disconnected ways of thinking and being—if you wonder what this is, kundalini itself is unitive, it draws the self together to initiate a chemistry and process that destroys unnecessary psychological/emotional structures and beliefs that keep a wider sense of union with the universe at bay) that the flow of dopamine also brings on other compounds critical to the awakened state (because awakening cannot be sustained by dopamine alone—I have a theory based on my observations that alone it creates paranoia). These compounds are oxytocin, adrenaline, norepinephrine, and endorphins. While it might seem counterintuitive that adrenaline and norepinephrine would have a play in awakening, it’s my observation that these compounds in small amounts help to counter the “spacy” nature of dopamine, helping to add balance and alertness to the experience. Obviously this cocktail is a delicate matter to be done with the human body, but my work shows me how it can be done by…anybody.

Dopamine Can Lead To A Cascade Of Releases

One beneficial advantage to supporting strong dopamine production in the body is it’s potential to assist in the release of emotional body armoring. The release of this armoring is an important step in the release process that helps dissolve the “false self” so often discussed in spiritual circles.

Drawbacks

One drawback of excesses of dopamine can be increased paranoia. One thing I noticed when I awoke was a sense that the world was not quite what I thought it was, which was itself completely accurate, along with a sense that I was overly focused on seeing nefarious intent behind geopolitical and personal relationships. While this “edginess” was not excessive, I notice that it is present in the majority of those in the awakened community (And who write or comment on blogs, online communities, etc., so that their views are known). My research into dopamine and it’s effects shows that yes, there is a direct correlation to kinds of paranoia and loads of dopamine in the body. Get too much, and schizophrenia results. Subjects who take L-dopa, for example, a synthetic form of dopamine, tended to develop paranoia after a while. This was popularly seen in the book and movie of the same name entitled Awakenings about patients who had become paralyzed by a rare neurological condition that left them unable to move.

I have suspected that dopamine may be contributing to our unique awareness of blocked energy in the light body. This is circuitous, but bear with me. I noticed in my reading about schizophrenia that those who had too much dopamine in the brain would begin to have hallucinations. Since dopamine is a neurotransmitter, it wasn’t hard to see how similar this effect was to the use and hallucinatory effects of LSD. LSD mimics neurotransmitters in the body and brain, resulting in a flood of data flowing through the brain now experienced as hallucinations. It made sense that if dopamine was a neurotransmitter, it could, and would, lead to hallucinations in the so-called schizophrenic. But what about those of us who aren’t hallucinating but who have a wealth of dopamine flowing in us?

Does Dopamine Turn The Mirrror Of Our Awareness?

I have considered that dopamine helps you to become aware of suppressed emotional material by allowing a means for this suppressed emotion to “talk” to us in a myriad of ways. Many show up as phantom sensations of pain, pressure, or tension in the region where the energy is blocked. Now could it be possible for this awareness to shift and turn from referred or hallucinated pain (which is just stored emotional pain, not real physical pain at all) to becoming or evolving into a voice that speaks in your head in the same way as a schizophrenic experiences it? I feel intuitively that this theory is correct and that the voices a schizophrenic hears is nothing more than the accumulation of stored emotional material that the psyche animates in order to make it aware of the stored emotion (except its never seen this way). I suspect that the “voices” in the mind of a sczitzophrenic are part of the same spectrum of experience as the awareness of blocked emotion is in the awakened person. If the self is unwilling to see it on the conscious side of awareness, then it seems it will see it on the subconscious side of the self, and in both cases, it will be expressed either as a hallucination in one case or an awareness of tightness, pressure in the body or even pain (phantom pressure or pain—as is so often expressed by people as happening in a large number of people in their first six months of initial awakening) . Because of this arrangement in the self seeking to bring subconscious material to the fore, it seems the self is not in control of these voices…which in the case of schizophrenia and awakening symptoms (of body pain) is very much true. It is a double edged sword; the price for making the self aware of its own shadow is that this shadow has to go from being subsumed within consciousness to becoming animated in one way or another. The question is to what degree. I think that the person who is awakened is merely experiencing a slightly less intense version of animated painbody (the record of our stored traumas) than the person who is unable to properly metabolize dopamine so that it accumulates and accentuates the symptoms or presence of high dopamine levels in the body.

What is interesting, is while researching the dopamine connection to awakening/kundalini, I came across schizophrenics who described their symptoms as identical to kundalini at a very specific period of their experience after going off their medication. I had stumbled across a whole group who were sharing their experience (on a dating site of all things) and they were actually using the term “kundalini” to describe their experience right up until they would experience a psychotic break, afterwhich, they would go into full blown hallucinations, and would go back onto their medication.

What was so fascinating was how identicaly one person in the group described my own awakening symptoms. Two weeks into not taking his medication, he developed a pressure band around the head (this is consistent with countless accounts of awakening that include a powerful third eye chakra activation which spreads like a “helmet” across the head) as he then began to see events at a great distance in a central portal of his inner eye or mind that looked like a small tv. This was my own experience EXACTLY. As I began to awaken, I had numerous nights where a portal like a small tv screen would open up and I would see scenes at a distance in exactly the same way as the sczitzophrenic had described (Not everyone will have This exact experience, but many experience the “helmet head” along with some kind of inner visual phenomenon. In my case, probably because I was on to something, the universe saw to it to provide me with an account that was identical to my own in order to grab my attention and help connect the dots). This continued in the person describing these remarkably similar events until dopamine levels got too high and created a tipping point into hallucination. But prior to the psychotic break, these people were golden, exhibiting all of the same symptoms of awakening such as expanded sensory capability, psychic ability, and changes in physical chemistry. Until too much dopamine was produced, their symptoms were all consistent with…..kundalini or awakening.

This was extremely fortunate because it helped to prove my dopamine hypothesis by providing what we call in science a negative. When I first identified dopamine as the chief compound that seemed to be driving kundalini, I was interested in seeing if there were conditions whereby a person had too much, or too little dopamine in the body. If my theory was correct I would expect to see a complete lack of kundalini symptoms (perhaps the antithesis of awakening in the case of a condition or disease where the body is starved of dopamine), or in the case of a disease where there is too much dopamine, I would expect to see symptoms with a high degree of correlation or coincidence with kundalini. And I believe that I have. But I’m not a scientist. I am only a highly engaged and passionately involved person who gives a shit about understanding ourselves here on this rock hurdling through space. Additionally, I have passed my findings on to researchers in the field, eminent scientists who have, as it turns out, completely ignored my efforts to contact them and convey this information. For them, coupling their work on sczitzophrenia to kundalini is tantamount to professional suicide it would seem. That world where we are open to all possibilities will have to wait for those who are material scientists. But talk about not being willing to go where the evidence will lead you!

So, to sum, by having a negative, I was able to see what happens when dopamine goes awry in the brain and body. Instead of being completely divorced from awakening, the symptoms were entirely consistent with kundalini or awakening, albeit with the dysfunctional aspect consistent with the condition of sczitzophrenia. Still, I felt that the hallucinations of the sczitzophrenic were just the furthest end of the awakened state (and an imbalanced one in regards to body chemistry—and the body is always seeming balance in order to stay healthy).

The Pleasure Principle

Dopamine is tied into our reward system in the brain. Whatever we associate as pleasurable will tend to be coupled to a dopamine “fix” that the brain delivers in the form of waves of pleasure. The problem is that we often associate pleasure with dysfunctional or unhealthy behaviors. What is so interesting is that awakening often leads to people dropping addictions. It is fascinating to me that a drug that when taken into the body from an outside source (opium, opiates, heroin) can lead to addiction can actually assist in freeing us from addictions when it’s generated in the body.

By looking closely at the compounds that are produced in awakening, we can better understand it’s physical basis and form common sense approaches to dealing with its presence in our lives (which does not automatically mean including pharmaceuticals to try and manage things!). I know that people with severe conditions need medication, but if we each were to learn how to switch dopamine on in the body, we would be much happier and in many cases, be drug free. There is a way. I was able to feel supreme levels of bliss at what should have been my absolute rock bottom when a divorce followed my awakening and my separation from my children whom I loved very much became an imposed condition of my divorce. I know that saying we don’t have control over our bodies simply shows a lack of awareness to the truth, and despite the environment, we can at any time, in any place, find peace and wellbeing. Isn’t this what all the great traditions and their teachers have had to tell us? The takeaway for me is that pleasure can heal. Not just any pleasure; pleasure no longer tied to a person, a place, a condition, or a substance smoked, shot up, or swallowed. Uncoupled from such conditions, the mind can remap itself, freeing itself from the tyrrany of belief and conditioned behavior. It seems, you still must be willing to surrender to it’s mighty power, showing the universe, a silent witness, really, that you trust it to heal you (which it of course obliges).

It can lead you to learning how to take control of your physiology by learning how to modulate your emotional responses in order to reduce certain undesirable chemicals produced (the chemistry of fear, say), while also boosting the output of the desirable chemistry. The question you might have here is, “How do I know which is the desirable chemistry?” The answer is that it is the chemistry that naturally emerges when enough fear and painbody is dropped. It is the natural state. Further, your body does seem to know, or is ready to give you bliss as soon as you give it the all-clear to start cooking up the chemistry of what that bliss looks like. Sadly, there is no one doing this work that I am aware of except for those of us who have had either the clinical background or the desire to make careful observations in order to gather data. Unfortunately the system is biased towards those who have been credentialed in the field. But who dares study this? The answer is no one. We then must fend for ourselves. Make observations, share your findings, develop a body of data.

(Copyright, 2018, Parker Stafford. No part may be copied or reproduced in whole or in part without expressed consent of the author)

Source: https://www.livestrong.com/article/408170-what-are-the-effects-of-too-much-dopamine/

Let It Speak To You

Awakening is like the Magic Visitor.

I am reminded today that if you have a teacher, that teacher might guide you to awakening. But if you don’t have a teacher, then awakening can come without the bells and whistles, instead being the force that brings you to it (this was how it happened to me—the force itself made it possible for me to awaken—I think it really wanted to wake me up!). Awakening, the Magical Visitor, finds the perfect way when there is a need. On a desert island? No worries; conditions will arise that will make it so you have visions. You will he tutored at night in the mysteries. Wherever you are, whatever your situation, the Magical Visitor will give you exactly what you needed in that moment. It feels so perfect because the solution has come from a place outside of time. That is why it feels so….fated…so perfect…because it comes from that place outside of our time. When you create a solution to a problem, you can see past, present, and future, so the solution will feel perfect.

Those in other traditions see this phenomenon, of course, but when you live in a country where there are yogis and yoginis, you use what you have. The Magic Visitor provides you with what fits you best for the time. But in so doing, people erroneously believe that the yogi or yogini is the Way. The Magic Visitor is much too versatile than that…

I have been told by a number of Indians that there is no way I could have awakened kundalini. They cite reasons, such as I do not have a guru, that I have not had darshan, that I did not cleanse the nadis (नाडी), that I did not do yoga, all prerequisites for even beginning to consider kundalini as making its way inside of you.

But what is kundalini?

I know that it is an abundance of life force, this thing we call prana or chi/qi. I know that in its abundance, I have felt its presence, its intelligence. I have tried speaking to it and I have quietly listened. It has spoken to me in the way that it seems to do best; imagery seen internally like dreams. To connect with it, I myself must be open to feeling, to being receptive, sensitive, intuitive. It whispers I must tap my feminine receptive side in my consciousness. It is a kind of vulnerability, it is also setting aside what I think I know. It is also embracing all the parts of who I am as my soul has created itself through many lifetimes as both man and woman. I pay heed to what my soul has sought in these lives as a way of knowing the Magic proportion necessary to bring myself to riotous creative fecundity, which is, simply, adjusting the masculine and feminine traits in my consciousness so that what is naturally in my soul can be expressed in this life, in this time. There is no better way to honor the Magic Visitor and no better way to bring forward and embody your authentic self. It means listening more than professing, at least for me. When I listen for it in nature, I know I am listening to myself. We exist in intensities cleverly hidden behind a veil of forgetting. You can pierce that veil by being receptive…

You cannot be hardheaded and do this well. I am heard-headed, but not when I hear it speak. I listen, I have made this promise to it that I want nothing more than to be more like it is….to grow into what it is, which is a visitor from the future. It doesn’t just come to me, but rather It is ready for me and waits for me to come to it, like how the feminine waits upon her suitor, using her own magical grace to make the call as It ripples through every atom on it’s way to him. What we are talking about is how intuition is able to access vast sums of information. It feels like how the feminine accesses the masculine.

It is a cheat, a wonderful opportunity to learn, to change my present and to change the whole time line – past, present and future. It says that we all win when we let this force into our lives. This is what it tells me.

What does it say to you? If you don’t think it will speak to you, have you tried? It is interesting how if you don’t have a teacher, it will bring the events perfectly timed so that you will get just what you need. Sometimes I think that we want to hear words from someone when all along we really needed to listen to the words that are welling up within us. By not listening, that wellspring can go dry, or appear to. Imagination is where you must go to begin accessing it. It is why so many miss it because they think imagination is just for fabrication, for making things up. True, but if you step three steps deeper into the secrets that imagination hides, you will quickly realize that imagination is used as a technology for making the unseen seen, the unknowable, known. Instead of fabrication, your mind goes blank, really blank, and you do not even worry about your mind being blank. So many people think the mind is like an art gallery whose spaces must be filled with objects, but this is not so at all. When you can not let your tinges of angst get to you that your mind is emptying out (gasp!), you can begin to experience transmissions both from the infinite as well as from your higher self. This is all done simply, by letting I tuition lead, by letting the blind part of the self seek it out….it is to me like being blinded, I cannot use my physical senses, I must use my inner senses instead, be blind to physical sensory experience and let my intuition and open imagination guide me. I can tell you that the more masculine rational mind will fuck it up every time because it is not made to comprehend the infinite. The feminine aspects of consciousness do. As a man, I have had to approach all of this openly, by making myself the way I need to be to find that Oracle within me, to sense the Presence of the Magic Visitor.

I have learned so much from this energy. It has shown me how it is. It has told me what I could hear when I asked questions of it. The answers also changed over time, too, as I matured and as I changed (which is telling; we may only hear what we ourselves will allow ourselves to know or grasp consciously). Sometimes there were things I either could not know the full answer on or would not be able to hear the answer for one reason or another….but always, the energy was kind and compassionate and considerate in its answers to me.

Sometimes I think that it would be nice to be in a community of like minded people, and in many ways I remain unwaivering in that sense. But then I get around these folks and I realize that what I am doing is perfect for me right now, and that I have reached a point where I rely so much on this energy to guide me that I may well be ungovernable…maybe that is a good thing!

Listen. Ask. Wait. Be ready for the answer. It might come through an inner message, it might come in the form of an unwitting conversation with a friend or stranger. When wading into these waters, expect the miraculous.

Energetic Update

Long before awakening came along for me, I had been seeing energy, called auras, for decades. I had studied energy and how it works in us for some time before awakening came. When awakening came though, there emerged a more complete and perhaps more direct and intense awareness of energy in all of its forms. Instead of just seeing the energy as I had done for years, I was feeling it, inside my own shell of perception. This is a perception that the late Jane Roberts trance personality Seth described 40 years ago as “Inner Vibrational Touch.” * Simply put, the sensory abilities that I had prior to the awakening event caused my inner senses that had already been used prior to be tripled in their strength at the least.

 

Some of my earliest perceptions as a consequence of my awakening was of an aspect of energy bodies better known as the meridian system. I saw these in others as well as myself (I had only seen a kind of fibrous character to the aura in the halo in the years prior to awakening with my ordinary energy sensing but now I was sensing the inner core of energy of all kinds). I didnt know at first that what I was glimpsing were meridians. I was doing this not with every person I saw. I was able to glimpse this through a particularly intimate or close connection that was forged as a facet of many awakenings that are referred to as the Twin Soul phenomenon. These are marked by a feeling as though one is sharing the same space as the other, that two consciousnesses are occupying the same psychic space even though they might be seperated by vast distances (in my case I had never met my “twin” in this life and she lived in another country).

In our encounters, which were less a willed process and one that simply was, I found  that my own inner proclivity to want to explore and discover manifested itself in my usng my newly enhanced third-eye perception to explore the physics of our bond. I wanted to understand why we were joined at the hip, so to speak, and why was it that thousands of others were also reporting the same phenomenon. I think I was able to see these meridian lines because of her and my initial close bonding.  Part of the experience was that the force of the draw was simply much too strong to resist, so instead of resisting, I went into it as deeply as I could in order to find out as much as I could about this experience (this blog is an outgrowth of those earliest of discoveries)

Very recently I realized that this perception of the meridians in the human body has a tie-in with what people describe as the “grid” or patterns in the universe. I was so not getting or even relating to all of this “grid” talk, mostly because the universe isnt a grid. I mean, if you look at it energetically, it isn’t. Instead, at the nano-scale, there are strands connecting everything to everything else in physical space, but this is seen at the subatomic scale mostly. The strands are so many that they wind up creating the appearance of a coherence…a glow rather than individual strands. Yet, this is the fundamental reality underlying this energy which is the necessity for a strand is based on laws related to physics (albeit energetically).

Since our bodies are made of matter and matter is energy, and because our consciousness is made up of aware energy (prana or qi), it makes sense to understand what we are dealing with here. I’m a guy who really loves to know how things work. I love how things work because I really want to know how I, a human, can co-create with the creative energy that pervades the whole universe ( and I know the energy is matter at a different vibration). That is it in a nutshell.

That said, the path to clearer seeing and perceiving is through a clarified self. To see clearly, the mirror must be polished, the glass must be cleared of its stain, the lake must be clarified of all of its muck to not only see into its depths, but to also see out of it. As a consequence, the inner work of clarifying, cleansing, and healing the distortions in the self are critical for a self that itself becomes the clear lense of inner sight (“insight”). The self must be cleansed of the forces that bias consciousness and misdirect attention. It is interesting that the force of awakening itself actually serves the purpose of helping to cleanse the self in this way. Followers, pilgrims, monks, and yogis through the ages have utilized the power of awakening to help cleanse the apparatus of perception so that they might see more clearly. The self, consciousness, becomes the telescope and microscope through which we can examine the world (and this includes the inner senses as well).

Doing this work leads to learning the difference between what I call the ego-compass and the soul-compass, which tends to point us in different directions (with the soul compass always getting us to the right place and cutting through the bullshit even if its the bullshit we have created for ourselves). We often tend to pick up the ego compass because it was such a central part of our thinking for so long, even if it led us into ditch after ditch. This is how we begin to adopt cosmic consciousness or cosmic mind. We learn that this so-called “false self” (boy I dislike that term!) is the same as this false or egoic compass. It is filled with things we desire, but those desires are driven by our distortions carried in our light body/consciousness . A real conundrum. Learning to detect the soulful compass from the selfish one can be a real challenge, but I have found that there are signs that help to identify it (both actually).

In the realm of energy, my eyes really were opened to a level I hadn’t quite experienced with seeing energy for years before awakening came. One of the first things that I found while existing in a state of union most of the time with a “soul twin” or “twin flame” experience was that I found that I would routinely use my inner sight to see her energy body. In truth, I coukd not always tell which was hers and which was mine sometimes.  I found that my consciousness would get very small and be able to see these strands of energy that moved through her whole body that looked like these white stands of light that looked a lot like nerve fibers. In fact, when I moved my energetic hand through them, I could feel them give and pull against my hand. They were kind of rubbery to my inner sense for energy. I also found that when I combed my hands through her field, it did two things. First, she would go into states of ecstacy, which she would complain of as being too much to take, to be able to feel, and still stay focused in the physical. Second, she would also go into opposite states that corresponded to what happens when we resist letting go of blocked energy. We have emotional meltdowns. I was there, combing her energy with my energy because I could feel how the interaction was so healing, but that it also was not the heady healing she was ready for. At this time, these meridians looked like white fibers. I was able to do this combing, a healing kind of massage, I guess, that I layer found was much like Reiki for how it was higher order energy and because I could do this from many thousands of miles away while it felt to her as though I was nearby The picture above is a poor representation of the strands I later saw, and how in earlier perceptions they were like veins or nerves, albeit energetic in nature and seeable only through the third eye. They were everywhere, down to the smallest level (cellular and subatomic) and up to the largest size along the torso.

If we fast forward a decade, we get to a point in my healing process where I have released a significant amount of material and I am finding that things are looking more and more different to me. What things, you might ask? Well, a lot of things really changed. For example, the release of so much emotionaly distorted stuff led me to understanding peoples’ behavior in relation to me in a much different way, which is that so much of what people think they see is the result of the distortions present in awareness. We assume so many things about how we think the world is or why people do what they do when in all truth we are judging based on each of our own inner rule book, which has nothing at all to do with what might actually be happening to the people in the world that we are seeing and judging (unknowingly). Our own inner distortions keep us from seeing things as the are, you see. That said, I am not suggesting that I am completely clear. I still have my work that I am actively engaged in, but increasingly, as I go from energetic event to energetic event, from one clearing to the next, my inner sensing has become much changed.

I knew that these white strands I had seen corresponded to the meridians in Chinese medicine. I saw that where each strand crossed another strand, ormwhere a branch moved into a central a channel, that there was always this little…chakra there, a vortex of energy. As each strand joined to still larger strands, these points got bigger and bigger, these chakras. Long before I knew anything about the fact that there are hundreds of thousands of chakras in the body, I was seeing many many of these points in the bodies of people who let me see them. I looked at my own, too, and it was when I was able to do this during a body work session with my healer that I was able to see something that I had never seen described in any of the literature….anywhere. Looking down at my body, I was able to see how each accupuncture/pressure point was actually made up of many other points all inside this one point. I saw in each strand also that the strand was not solid or monolithic but was instead made up of thousands and thousands of strands all within the same meridian itself. It was not unlike how it might look to see a bundle of fiberoptic fibers upclose. I could see some fibers within the meridian that were colored more darkly and I could trace that fiber back to a chakra point or meridian point down, say, into the leg or near the back, even though I was looking at the meridian going up the torso before it moved into the heart chakra, for example. I was able to see that everything in this meridian system was related to everything else and that all ofmit was delicately, masterfully, created as a portal for bringing in energy from the universe and spirit into our here and now. This energy could be for healing, for creating new technologies, for any number of things.

What came next was the realization that what was in us was also in the universe. Now, I knew that the torus field exists around every atom, every living being, and is also surrounding the earth, the sun, and also the galaxy, but so too is this thing everyone has been calling “the grid.” I just wasn’t making the connection! Tiny little torus’s that make up ever subatomic particle on up to living things, planets, suns, the whole shooting match. Making this connection helps to explain why it is that we feel everything as sentient and alive (because this living energy that runs through everything sentient and nonsentient is alive even if its in nonsentient matter….(as if THAT now makes ANY sense whatsoever!) It also shows that just as we have blocked energy in our bodies there can be blocked energy placed in the physical system, too. This manifests as troubled areas in the world where mostly humans fought or hurt each other and got energy stuck in the area where things took place. This can be released in the same way that we release stuck energy in ourselves.

I noticed that when I saw these energy points or chakras with all of these other smaller points from other strands or meridians within them, I realized that this was probably what was behind the depiction of chakras as many-petalled flowers. What I saw was a disc with many other discs within it. Each smaller disc was a strand from another chakra in the body, which means that our energy body is this interconnected, redundant system that takes the idea of connectivity to a whole new level. To say we were made for connection is an understatement! I had not read anywhere that a petal on one chakra corresponded to another chakra…but here I was seeing how these little ringlets or sphericules surrounding a pressure point were relating to a point in another chakra. Have you ever touched a point on your body and felt as though it was also touching another point further away?…as if you were touching two points, one physically and one energetically? It is very much like this in a way.

Now hang on: I want to stress something and I hope you can get what I am going to say. Inhave enough observations in thenworld of energy to know that since energy rides between one dimension and others, trying to get it to fall into neatly defined catagories is probably foolhearty to do. I have noticed that my perception will sometimes offer me something that is more like a hallucination, or an inner sensory creation in order to provide me information about the truth of what is going on. Many people who see auras describe them in a fairly uniform way despite the fact that the eyes cannot really see into that wavelength of energy! So what gives? The deeper truth here is that seeing auras is not a physical sense…at all. It is an inner sense. It appears that one is actually seeing this halo around the body when in fact, this is all just a seeming. Wait!! What?!! It is now widely known that when the brain is confronted with information that does not come from the five senses, it will plug that data into a sensory slot that makes the most sense to it at the time. Physiological psycholgists are familiar with this spectrum of behavior and itnis now well documented tha this does indeed happen. In  the case of seeing auras, the brain is aware of all of this information and it puts it into a visual center to be processed, even though it is not coming in from physical senses (this is how psychics can report hearing voices-claireaudience-as a means if speaking with thise who are no longer physical, for example). It seems that we are wired or designed for psychic senses.

As long as we carry powerful enough distortions in our fields of awareness, we will mistake our distortions for the truth. This is the risk we take. By learning how to FEEL fully and more deeply, we can begin to feel the deep innermost compass in our soul that will not err in directing each of us to the right place for our development and fulfillment.

I have also noticed that we can’t really examine these points beyond a third eye awareness and make much sense of them. Yes, we can objectively see where a strand or a chakra is blocked, but the path to unblocking is one that is not done objectively, but rather, subjectively. Subjectively how? By feeling, of course! By letting that rip-tide of near-orgasmic energy that is the bliss field pouring through us illuminate the blocks and push them on up and out, effectively transmuting the blocked energy into bliss energy! This is irrational. Forget your need or ability to control-like Shakti this is wild and free. This is through feeling that we do this. When you let this bliss flow and then shine that bliss into the darker corners of yourself or another, it begins to break up the blocked energy right away….unless the other resists it. And sometimes when we turn it on ourselves, we can actually feel the resistance building in us. But what I have found is that this is not cause for upset with ourselves, just see the resistance as a sign that points directly to where your next challenge in healing lies. A problem thus becomes your teacher….not just a problem to be solved or set aside (or worse; hidden). Some people have an amazing ability to hold onto old junk and keep from letting go their grip on the familiar in favor of the new human experiencing the cosmic (I count myself as one of these people with an extraordinary grip!). Anyway…

So we can use the rational mind to see things as they are if we can clear the third eye chakra. But seeing is not feeling, so be ready to feel the issue full-on with your whole energy body. But to feel clearly, I have found we each need to be clear….and to be clear, we really need to be honest with ourselves. I have seen how others have fooled themselves into thinking they were further along then they really were because of how their own work was used to fuel their often brutalized ego, which soaked up all the love and turned it into more of itself (which was ego-energy).

If you want a quick way out of the path of progress, just feed that ego. It will tell you all kinds of things, some completely true, but some remarkably distorted, about how things are. This is in large part because the small individual ego onlynhas access to your own localized belief systems that you have adopted in this life, it does not access as a matter of course the information from the superself or cosmic consciousness (which is where an even more expansive sense or superego resides that is involved in touching the others in cosmic encounters beyond ordinary consciousness) This is why it is so useful to be able to step outside of ego and into that silence of the self where the eternal stream of pranic bliss can be met and felt. It isn’t that ego is bad or evil. It is in fact completely necessary as a filtering device for phenomenon (trust me, feeling your neighbor stubbing her toe isn’t always the great experience-we are individual for a reason). Without ego, you would be completely overtaken with the flood of information flowing through the whole of the universe, which happens to also be flowing through you as well (we just feel it as “flow” instead of the gazillions of feelings thoughts and bitsmof information from everyone and everything else in the universe). Haven’t you ever felt that stream of energy-as-information? Have you sensed how it would be just too much for any one person to be completely aware of? Have you felt that overwhelming immensity, knowing that you were standing off to the side, like a person looking at an immense vista rather than merging with its totality? Well, that is what we do each moment of the day. It is also why the energy is orgasmic…it carries so much creative energy, which is naturally stimulating in nature. And by orgasmic, I mean energetically orgasmic, what the Buddhas have all known as bliss. To handle it all, and to experience individuality, we have the marvelous filter called ego. But we also have to be careful that it doesnt get inflated, right? By learning to side-step ego, cosmic consciousness can be experienced without it getting in the way. Some want to call this “ego death” which, having gone through what this is supposed to represent, I can say that ego does not die…only our dependence on its filling a central role in our lives dies or is refigured. No death, only life. More and more life!

I observed that the meridian system connects everything in the body, along energetic lines, together. This means that I saw how these lines exist all the way down at the subatomic level. This is what I mean when I said in the beginning that I explored the energy body of the one I was connected to at the early stages of my awakening. AsmI delved into the energy field, I saw that these lines went to finer and finer lines until the lines went into subatomic particles. Its really wuite a fascinating thing to see. At the level of the atom, these lines look different than the main meridians do. At the level of the meridians that travel along the trunk of the body, there are so many strands existing there from all the other things that the energy is connecting, that it looks like an artery when it is in truth made up of millions of individual strands, much like fiber optic cables that are bundled together. Further, the way a strand or “artery” feels in the torso is different from how it feels at the subatomic level. At the subatomic level,the force is very weak compared to the force of the overall auric field. Still, though, there is nothing quite so joyous as feeling what the “subatomics” are feeling every moment of the day. The capacity might be small at the subatomic level, but the force it connects to is very strong (the universe). When I have seen the strands at the subatomic level, they are much like spiders webs, except that the strand is made up of extremely thin strands of white light that has this slight glow around them. The glow from a distance in perception can be read as the strand itself, making it seem bigger than it is. Look closely and I saw that the energy was both field and particle all at once. It was hard for me to divide this perception…it was simply…both all at once. It had magnetic properties that made it possible to disrupt the flow while still maintaining the overall structure of the energetic field. If you cut off a finger, the field is not cut off, it reforms itself like the body does in order to heal.

Whether or not our own chakras corresponds to chakras that are in the physical system, like the earth or cosmos, I can’t say. I haven’t looked into it like this yet, but I am interested in doing so. I am also very interested in anyone who might have some observations that they have made along these lines. I do know that I have felt the energetic lines of the earth every day, and I have felt the energy of the sun and how it interacts with earth. I just haven’t sensed into these bodies or fields for the presence of these transit lines or points where they cross (aka chakras). Maybe in the universe it is on a different scale than our own bodies. I’m not sure that our chakra system is a carbon copy of anything except the human being. Maybe the transit system for energy is what is common, tying everything together regardless of how things connect together. I would love to hear your thoughts because you know how meditating on and noodling these things are…

 

* While in trance, Jane Roberts personality Seth described a series of inner senses which readers ofmthe Seth books could discover and use for better understanding the world and their place in it. Inner Vibrational Touch was described as picking up where empathy leaves off. Empathy suggests an ability to reflect on ones own past experience and infer what someone must be feeling. With IVT, it is possible to feel as the other person is feeling in that moment. One is able to tune into the specific vibration of emotion and replicate it within ones own perception. It thus feels as though one is experiencing directly what the other person is feeling (this is also consistent with the majority of people and their experiences with awakening).

For perspective, the Egyptian culture brought us the description and detailing of hundreds of inner senses, of which IVT is but one of many.

Grace

Kundalini

Dreaming Change

Okay, so much is political again today here on the WWW. It’s okay. Gotta have the feels and causes, right?

Last night, there came another in a string of interesting dreams that’s been visiting me lately. Lucky for me, my dreams have become so much clearer, easier to translate this last decade since awakening has come.

So it was that an old teacher showed up with this map in my dream. My eyes scanned across it’s surface and I found that it had been written in a different language. The key to understanding it was understanding the language. I had assumed that if I were given a map in, say, Lithuanian, I’d still he able to read it. But not this one. I couldn’t tell what the scale was, what any of the words meant…it was more than just names for locations (which is easy enough to guess). But then, this was no ordinary map and this was no ordinary dream.

My teacher sat across from me, beaming in excitement over her discovery which she had unfolded in front of me. As this wordless exchange happened, I opened my mouth to ask her how to read it and I instantly returned to waking (and having overslept my alarm clock, too–sorry Hannah!).

Simply put, we cannot understand the new while using the old ways of thinking. We talk about how people don’t get us, how a political party or group of some kind is clueless about an issue, or how we repeat mistakes often with tragic results over and over. We keep doing things the same way, approaching a problem the same way all with no change in outcomes.

“Um…hello? Earth to human: the way to a new way of seeing the world is by changing the part of you that will allow for better comprehension: your mind.”

All the great teachers have taught this. Buddha did and so did Jesus (his were obfuscated by way of incorrect translation from Greek to Latin—check the word “metanoia” and how both Jesus and John the Baptist used it to better understand this one to get how they advocated “changing your mind”).

In helping to bring change in life, I have found that something always has to give in order to see things in a new way. You just can’t get there using the old map. Something that you take as belief, assumption, or that immovable pillar of understanding may in fact be blocking the way. It could be ANYTHING….a belief, a desire to stay rooted in being a victim (and cleverly not taking responsibility for ones’ feelings and subsequent actions) It might be how you think men should be treated, or how women should be treated. It might be a religious belief that was promulgated thousands of years in our past in tents by Bedouin-like tribes that still governs our behavior in the world in regards to each other. All of this can be shed through a simple act of radical willingness to bridge the gap, to understand by setting aside whatever is blocking our path.

It takes humility.

It removes our savage habit of retaliation against the “ignorant infidel” for their own lack of awareness. Blocked people at war with other’s own blocks or limitations. It’s rather hilarious when you think about it. And it would be a real belly laugh if it weren’t so incredibly serious. People will deny you, unfriend you, demonize, and even kill you over this. It’s hilarious for maybe three short seconds ’till the sh*t gets real. What I’m talking about are the principles involved in the forces that drive you, me, and everyone else here on the planet. Conditioning. Belief. Dogma. Go deeper and what drives us in a negative way is fear.

Curiously, the soul knows it’s contract with the multiverse and it’s implicit divinity, and it’s compass can be read when the way has been cleared of as much bias (conditioned belief) as possible….to read the maps that lead us into those new lands. Again, openess, ready for the memory banks to be wiped, the old programming scrapped, is required. And no, I don’t at all advocate ever following what another says is the way. Inquire, seek. It’s in us to know, to discover. Our past is littered with wrong belief.

Here in the U.S. we once believed that our colonizing North America was approved of by God. As we killed and marginalized the indigenous People here our ancestors actually believed God was on their side. I could cite hundreds more of these examples, but the point here is that no matter how good you think your model is, it is constrained and limited by the thinking in the past. In the sands of Ur, where Abraham lived, the concept of woman coming from a man’s rib was dreamed up. Talk about crafty! The moment someone protests the characterization of women as lesser, or an afterthought to the primary and blessed male of God, it is explained how sweet it is that men and women were once from the same flesh, joined as one and now forever seeking that union. You get the idea; mysoginistic bullshit out the yinyang. Still, in our day, it is a thing discussed as if it were real. We all have work to do. Let’s get to it, shall we?

Beyond your programmed beliefs about death penalties, life and death, homosexuality, dark or light-skinned people, or how the role of government, or ten thousand other things should be in our world, the pearl of truth will always emerge wordless but knowing. Our problem as Westerners is we havent a clue how to deal with truth neing a wordless knowing thing. We are so used to rational thought that the intuitive scares us, and when we are scared of something, we demonize it. We make jokes, we do anything to forestall actually trying to understand it. Part of reading that map is letting go of the fear that the new or different presents to us. I have known people who, awakened even, have lied and denied just as away to remain in their comfy place. Sadly, even in awakening there is the risk of becoming a comfortable place. It happened to me just months after the serpentine force rose in me, changing me. I had changed, hadn’t I? Relatively speaking, it was just a drop in the bucket. It seemed like a lot, but compared to the many summits above me, it was an important journey in the lowlands of a wild world.

To get anywhere I had to step outside of what everyone was saying in regards to the awakening experience in order for me to see it for what it is and then to make myself available to a whole new level. This changed me irrevocably, and I had an energetic force in me pushing the issue. I get it: it was easier to change with this gift by my side. But even those first six months spent in the tsunami waves did knock me apart, it was all relative. I had to keep asking questions of the world view I had in order to break on through to the other side (thank you Jim Morrison).

You don’t have to be awakened to begin changing your world view. You just begin by examining it. Just remember that to really see it, you will have to get out of your comfort zone.

Men have been quite comfortable aligning their desire to the beauty of women. This has led, along with paternalistic belief, to the objectification of women and rape culture. Now I ask you, how comfy is your desire now? How can you change how you see women so that your desire is not channeled on the way it once was? Or how about how as a woman you might view men as the stoic suck-it-up-no-nonsense kind of person, completely unaware how this map locks a man into an expectation of having no feeling, no sensitivity (because it’s being denied), resulting in male anger and rage. In both cases, these views of how we think things should be are dehumanizing to both women and men.

The way to change is to be aware they exist. Then, you observe honestly how they govern you and your outlook. Those outlooks master you. If you can be honest and listen to what others are saying, you can begin to catch the errors. Bear in mind that while you listen to others to catch where you might have gone wrong, each condition has it’s own layer of error or distortion, and you need to be able to see error and the right together at the same time. Every view will have its own distortions. An antiwar group could wind up advocating violence, for example, making them just as bad as the warring sides. A man can expect a rule to apply to everyone but himself. The same with a woman. These blocks keep us from seeing a new world. It is done with discernment and finesse. It’s probably not working if it doesn’t create a good deal of discomfort as one approaches being ready for the nuts and bolts of just letting the stuff go.

New maps for a new world await each of us. But always, we believe our old ways are the good ones until we glimpse the brutality in us that those beliefs represent. Until then, political memes, social memes, religious ones. Everyone shouting, no one wanting real dialog…I sit and continue my meditation and inner inquiry to find out what is blocking me to see that map.

~Namasté

My Experience With Hypnotic Regression

 

It seems that I am, in my awakening, destined to try out all sorts of methods for assisting in the cleansing of consciousness….of stored material that gets in the way of knowing the authentic self and the connection that we have as our birthright (each of us!) with the divine.

I go about finding a new modality in large part intuitively. Sometimes someone will mention something a day or two after I have begun thinking about the same modality (I first sense maybe it might be a good one to try) and very often I will get a rather odd series of confirmations from innocent  bystanders who all mention the modality within a rather short span of time, usually a day or two, maybe three. I of course have never said peep about these modalities, it is the magic part in all of this, you see. No one knows that its anything that I have been thinking about, which is key to me for knowing when its a genuine synchronicity. Its how this thing works most often for me. It is like, through others, the universe tells me what is next on the agenda when it’s unable to contact me directly through dream or in meditation. Maybe an odd sounding thing at first, I can assure you that there is an efficiency about it that, once followed, leads to rather effective and rapid changes. There have been considerations of mine that just never go anywhere…a thought is raised, nothing comes because of it, and it gets dropped. But I never know when I will be on to something golden for me, it is a bit of a surprise. This is very much in line with the phenomenon involving synchronistic events that is experienced once a person is awakened. Everyone talks about them. I began utilizing them as a way to get a little more out of them than that uncanny 1:11 or 3:33 or 11:11. I get it, a sign to remind you where you are. But at a certain point in awakening I thought that there was much more to this odd phenomenon than just numbers or meaningful coincidences. For me, I began seeing it as a form of guidance, that the universe was speaking to me…because once I considered that it could be something more…it was.

Once I did this, I began to get direction more and more through these events that most often come in groups of threes. Its just how it works for me. It is like a code to show me that its not just a random coincidence, but rather something from the numinous realm. I think of how this all works as being like a cosmic morse code or how a secret knock is decided upon for two parties to know that a special guest has arrived, except for me it is the triple event that is the unmistakable sign of this having come from that place of the eternal light. For me and the universe (perhaps an aspect of my higher self, I often consider), we have a triple event arrangement that has been laid out. Anyway, the point here is that I listen to these events as a form of direction once they come in their triple form. For me, they are closely oriented, these events, in time. Some have been seperated by hours or minutes. The further away they get from each other on the time line the less likely that they mean much of anything. With my recent foray into regression therapy, it was much the same. I knew that this was something that would most likely work very well for me (even though I have felt that I would make a bad hypnotic subject). With the signs there, I looked into it, found a therapist fairly quickly, got an appointment, and went to see her. It all worked out smooth as silk, another good sign.

I travelled a number of hours to get to the office of my therapist. I was concerned about the effect that the hours of driving might have on my mental state, but this proved to be of no consequence. I had already explained my situation and how I had been involved in the release of stored emotional material for close to a decade, that there was a lot that had gone, but what remained was the hardest or the most stubborn stuff (so it was the hardest stuff, or so it has seemed). My therapist explained that instead of deep breathing (holotropic, for one) that we would dive into regression right away. She gave me a very quick overview of how it works and I was quickly lying down and getting relaxed.

I was  fist told to imagine a location that I liked a lot. It might be by a river, a beach, or some other natural surround. There were a series of suggestions and visualizations intended to relax me and then the image of a fog that moved into the area where I saw myself lying relaxed. It was suggested that I join with this fog or mist and let it take me where it will. It was curious to me that I was not taken to a specific time in the past (like a previous life), this was left open by my therapist. I guess she was hoping to take me to my past life before this one. She was surprised to find that the life I was in during the session was my present life. I had even said to her at one point in our presession talk that it might be best to just go back to my childhood past.

The result of this was that I wound up at about age one in my present life at a point very close to my fathers death. What I found curious about this was how easy it all seemed. My therapist had said before we began the session, “I have found that feeling as though I am making up the details in my head is a good sign that I am actually on to something; just go with it and see where it leads you.” I found that scenes would just pop up automatically, and instead of me censoring or questioning why they were there, I just went with them right out of the gate. It was at this point that there was a lot of detail swelling up around me in the form of events and feelings, which my therapist was busily writing down. I wasn’t taken deep into a hypnotic trance to the point where I had difficulty recalling details later. Instead, I was quite aware of my surroundings in the room in 2018 as scenes from the past just popped up and I looked at them and sought to determine why they were important. In a way, this was much like a meditative state that I was in.  So much for the deep hypnotic trance, right? I really had thought that I would need to go deep in order to get anything. Apparently not!

I knew that the events of my early life were hard ones, ones that put me in an emotionally stuck place very early. I had given up accessing memory from that time because it seemed that while I had some very early memories in my life that were quite clear in my mind, I had a complete and total black-out on any memories having to do with my father. It was really quite curious….and telling…

The session did not involve my tapping into a memory of my father, not one of him while he was alive. Most of it had to do with the events surrounding him and his death. I did have one telling memory that involved my awareness of his body lying on the bed after he had died. It was one of those moments that felt like an “oops” moment where the small child is let into the room where the dead father lay on the bed. In fact, it was possible that I feltnthis just by walking by his room. The one thing that I noticed was that I seemed to be as sensitive energetically as I am now in awakening, essentially sensing everything from the inside out instead of just through the physical senses alone.

My father had a form of cancer that was known to metasticize very quickly in the body. There was virtually no hope for coming back from a diagnosis of his cancer. There was this odd swirl of denial going on where my father was concerned, perhaps his own way of coping with the innevitability of his own death and the uncertainty so many people feel about death and what might not exist beyond its doorway. So he had died at home, in the middle of the night, he had finally been able to let go and slip away. In my memory, I am walking past a bed, just the corner of it which was close to the door into the bedroom. I had this awarness, quite suddenly, of his presence filling the house one moment, then gone the next moment, even though his body was lying on the bed. I was extremely aware of how absent he was in that moment. It was like brushing past a person and feeling deep inside that this person was simply….no longer there. It was such an odd feeling, one that was entirely new in this life of mine at onenyear of age.

My therapist didnt understand at first what I meant. I had to explain, “Its like how the driver of a car steps out and the car is still there, but the driver isn’t. He was there one moment, then completely gone the next. His physical body was right there but I knew even though I was small, that he was just gone…” There was a shock about this. I also did not understand what this meant. I didnt fully understand that his sickness would lead to his death. I think in my world, you got sick, then you got better. That was the range of my experience. As small children, I think we are mire blank slates at certain points in our development. I have always sensed thatnwe do have memories very early on about our previous lives, but as we become more in our bodies and in greater command of it, those connections to past memories fade. As a result of this, there  was a directness to everything. I did less reflecting and more direct processing of what was happening, and this struck me as being different with how things are in my mind now, with so much more experience to pull from, comparing with, judge, etcetera. As small children, we look outward with a fresh uneducated and unbiased view until experience builds over time and we accumulate memories…at which time our perceptions change, or at least our relationship to those perceptions. As children, its so much simpler, direct. But there is less awareness of what all of what is happening might mean. All of that is simply  not there, at least that is how I experienced it.

It was this suddenness of my father’s absence that served to become the formation of the first major block in my early life. My siblings and I were not taken to the funeral on the advice of extended family who thought it wasn’t the right thing for my mother to do. This, though, created still more problems than they solved. My father became a mystery, a man who just evaporated in the night and was just….gone. I told the therapist later that in my family,  we didn’t talk about the death of my father that much. I never knew what he had died of until I was age ten, for example. It was as though we just rolled up the carpet of those events and packed them away in an attic or basement somewhere. I got the sense that it was just too painful to talk about these things, so we didnt. Such is the stuff that blocked emotional trauma is made of. And here we go, digging up those bones again so that we might be able to release the ghosts that they represent for us so that their ghost can be released from us.

While I was still under hypnosis, my therapist asked me to look at my father and tell  her what I saw after we had gone though this tour of memory. I said I saw the self that he was and the self that he is now, side by side. I was told to let the image of my father go into the memory of the small child I was, and then let the memory of my toddler self integrate itself into who I am now  and become a part of who I am now.  I then let go the father that was to see the father who is now. Then I was directed to cut the cords  that I have with my father, imagining the cord being sliced through and both of us being free to just be ourselves. By being stuck so early on, I was literally stuck in an early version of myself. By doing this, the idea was that I could better integrate my infant self with who I am today for greater wholeness.  Just being able to disrupt an old recursive memory pattern tied to a stuck emotion could help me to begin feeling….different.

Once we had done this, we had to move quickly because our hour was over, and another client was waiting for their session to begin.

Being able to grieve the loss of my father is an important step to my wholeness, I realize. By holding up or keeping grief at bay for years,the chemical signature that grief made in the body can lead to health problems that are chronic at midlife. A small niggling feeling, which boosts, say, adrenaline but suppresses endorphins and dopamine in the body can lead to a chemical landscape that could favor cancer, or dementia later in life, all depending on which way one decides to go emotionally. Does fear acidify the body? Do the kidneys and liver have to work harder to balance this acidification, for example? I am not a chemist or biologist, but what I do know is that our consciousness, as it resides in our bodies, tells the body system what (with the body following by producing chemistry to mimic what is happening in consciousness) to do based on the moment by moment state that this consciousness is in. I have been keen to remove as much of this material as possible over the course of the last ten years since awakening has come.

What is the chemical signature of grief held in the body for decades? Subtle, no doubt, but like a drip, drip, drip, wearing away the stone of our body and its integrity, it often will manifest at moments of physical weakness in the immune system, or a weakening ofnthe kidneys, or with some imbalance in nutrition or an illness that leaves us short on needed nutrients for building the physical representation of who we are in our souls, thoughts, and emotions. What is the physical chemical signature of fear, of anger, or paranoia, of jealousy, or worry? What effect do these have on us long-term as those stuck emotions live in us, unable to budge, unhealed, causing all manner of problems?

Releasing these stuck emotions leads to the cessation of those issues forever, I have noted. If they come back, they werent really fully released. When released, it is like breaking the chains on something that has imprisoned you for years (often without your realizing how much it had affected you all along). In my case, I know that the removal of these blocked energies can give us a new lease on life. Years ago I had an entire body of energy pulled out of me by,of all things, an angelic presence. With it went tension, physical pain, and symptoms that had been bothering me for close to a year. While I refused to get diagnosed prior to this, the symptoms in my case were consistent with cancer, which went completely away once this bundle of body emotion was pulled out of me. If you think of it this way that your body is a mirror of your soul, then your thoughts and feelings are the body of your soul through eternity, then changing your thoughts and feelings can lead to changing how the mirror of that soul, the body, responds to the signals being sent to it from the “driver” of that body.

This is an inside job. You alone can do it, but despite how impossible it might seem to you now, it is well within your reach. I am no different from anyone else, I just know that it can be made simple if we let it. And really, the world conforms to our notions of what it is that we think it is. A rationalist scientist does not have the bizarre and magical events we call synchronicity because s/he doesn’t believe that such a thing is even…..a thing. So it isn’t. But once you FEEL the juicy energy within consciousness as strong enough to move mountains, well, the mountains move…

There are many therapists throughtout the U.S. and abroad  who are trained in regression therapy who can help you in your work. Luckily, they are easier to find now with the internet as our vast storehouse of information.

Peace Be With You…

 

#reincarnation, #regressiontherapy, #hypnoticregression

 

An Unmistaken Case Of Reincarnation

NOTE: I have been quiet for a while, I have been busy with building projects and doing work on the studio for improvements to make things work better. Everything is working great, and I am eager to re-christen my studio business after having let it law fallow for a number of years.  I would not have been able to allow myself to go as far “out” as I did in my inner work had it not been for being able to allow the incredible focus required in my business to go by the wayside for a time. That time is now past and I am revving the engines of my new studio practice that will have new elements that will allow me to work with the community in new and beneficial ways. It has been a busy but very exciting time. So with that, a story about reincarnation follows….

 

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It’s hard for many Westerners to wrap their heads around the notion of reincarnation sometimes. We are taught from an early age that this is a belief that verges on superstition, unsupported by science, that it is not within the confines of true Christian though, or of just about any thought outside of Buddhism. There is an incredible resistance in many people’s minds about this subject. I know that in my own experience, everyone that I know who is a skeptic is someone who themselves do not have a past life experience or memory.  I think its perfectly fine to be skeptical, but at a certain point skepticism becomes demagogery.  This is where belief sets in because the very nature of belief is that you are not accepting of something based on factual data, but on no proof whatsoever.  That is a tall order, don’t you think, to accept something without really knowing for sure whether it is true?  On the one hand, this is crucial for being able to explore new ideas or possibilities, but it can also result in swallowing a tall tale hook line and stinker!  In researching our history in Christianity, one can trace where the concept of reincarnation was weeded out by Roman emperors.  It is a fascinating story, and for years I had always heard that it was Emperor Constantine’s wife who was responsible for striking the concept of reincarnation from the Biblical accounts.  In fact, it wasn’t Constantine’s wife, but a later wife of an emperor named Justinian.  That story was recounted in a previous post on the subject on this blog a few years ago. It is worth reading and worth getting up on the subject if you are at all interested in how Christianity was shaped, changed, and finally forged into a version of itself now known as the Orthodox view.  It is not, however, the focus of this blog entry today, though.  If you really want to dig into the subject you can read about the history here:  https://wordpress.com/post/wakingtheinfinite.wordpress.com/1350

 

For whatever reason, I have had numerous past lives that have emerged over time to be known by me.  In most every case, the recollection was part of some lesson being integrated into my heart and mind at the time and which also bore on something that had happened similarly in the past.  What is so interesting is that this is exactly what Tibetan monks and other Rinpoche’s have said reincarnation happens in your memory.  That seems reasonable, right?  As one Rinpoche has said, if you want to know your past life, look at the conditions of your life right now and you will see everything that was in that past life.  These past life recollections were very often part of some pattern shared with events happening today.  In one case, I saw three lifetimes briefly, but which each showed me how I had explored the nature of possessing wealth.  In one life I was born as a king into it, in another, I was a grave robber of many of the surrounding tombs where I had lived and reigned as that king.  In yet another, I was a woman who was part of a large cache of wealth being transported in the hull of a small ship with several other women who I thought of as my sisters.  In this lifetime, I WAS the wealth; I was a possession.  I was part of a harem.

 

In other instances, I have had past life memories bearing on events in my life today, such as a life as a native American man, a freed slave in the post-civil war south, and as a leader of a group of Polynesians who lived on islands in the Pacific during a migration.  This memory came up as I lay on the therapy table with my body worker who does deep tissue and energy work.  Hers was called Kahuna medicine and it honors both sides of our energetic potential; the masculine and feminine forces of Chi or life force energy.  I was lying there as she removed a blocked piece of energy and I found myself jarred back into a very old memory that involved me looking at my feet as a small child of three, suddenly and completely aware of where I was and what was happening.  I was standing on the beach along the Gulf of Mexico in Florida just before being hauled out into the waves to clean the sand off of me after our outing there.  Because I was afraid of the waves, this was a terrorizing event that left me crying all the way home.  Odd reaction, you might think, and maybe so unless you were there with me as I slipped from childhood memory to yet another memory further back in time when I was living on an island in the Pacific with a tribe of dark-skinned people who traveled from island to island in our quest to find our own paradise. In that memory I had called for us to head out across the ocean only to run into a storm so violent, every single person in our group was completely wiped out.  The waves crashing down were unbelievably large and the guilt that lay around my neck was deep and heavy.  It took lifetimes to get to a place where I would be able to release both the guilt but also the fear I had of water that was mirrored in my childhood experience but whose genesis for that fear was farther back in time.  The point being that these two memories were tied together in a way that made them relevant.

I am mentioning this because there was a time when I ever wondered if I would ever have recall of a lifetime. It seemed that for years growing up that things were…well…normal.  And then things began to happen once I moved away from home.  I just began to wake up more and more.  As that happened, more and more things rose to the surface.  Over time, I found that my own dreams at night often carried past life material in them.  So far, I have two languages to my credit that are no longer being spoken from two distinct cultures that I had lifetimes in.  In each case, hearing the language spoken in the memory led me to the culture.  I say this because somewhere you might have traveled to some faraway location and felt it was so familiar, you might have met someone who seemed as though you had known them before and that you simply picked up where you had left off in some seemingly unknown past. Maybe you have friends who wonder over your ability to do something better than most people.  They call you gifted, but maybe it comes from having done it before, having had lifetimes of practice.  An event might have triggered recall, or you might have had dreams about them.  I am of the mind that we need to know who we really are in order that we might perfect ourselves so that we might be able to open our minds more and know how the world really works.  The Easterners call this pulling back the veil of illusion.  Me, I just consider it being able to more accurately perceive the world as it is, instead of as we are.

Well what happens when your teacher dies and you are tasked with finding the new reincarnation of your teacher?  This has already happened and the story of its happening was recorded and is available for you to see on Gaiam tv and Amazon Prime Video.  The story I am writing about is that of a Tibetan monk who recently went on a journey to find his teacher’s reincarnation in a process of discovery that is nothing short of remarkable and should leave those who have been stolid disbelievers with a twinkle of possibility concerning the reality of reincarnation. I have always felt that we need to record instances like these in as clear and unbiased way as we can because helping people to know their true selves, their fuller being in this world is what spiritual liberation is all about.  Jesus taught it, Dogen taught it, Buddha taught it, and all of the other great teachers down through time have taught it.  While their methods might have all been a little different, their concepts are not that different from one another.  Jesus spoke of the “life” or the “water of life” while Zen Buddhists described it as the golden flower, the bloom which bring imperishabillity.

 

The unmistaken child is a contemporary story about the reincarnation of a Rinpoche, an enlightened being who has come to earth to assist others in overcoming the veil of illusion that keeps souls caught in a cycle  of both suffering and reincarnation.  It is quite a lovely story, worth seeing if you get the chance.

 

“If you want to know your future life, know your present actions.”

-Padasabhava, 8th Century

In The Shadow Of The Light

In my last entry I described a meditation I got caught up in that resulted in strong light activity, a phenomenon often tied to awakening experiences. After what was a very productive session, I decided it would be a good idea to revisit the meditation again to see if I could continue with the work. This time was decidedly different, but was oddly similar to the movie about the after death experience “What Dreams May Come” starring Robin Williams. In a similar way, it was also a bit like the movie “Inception” too. This was due to the lucidity present throughout the experience, I think.

When I say my meditation was like a movie, it’s not lost on me that there was an undercurrent of drama, hinting at a subsumed emotional energy, like a great big question lying in hidden veils at the center of some great edifice that kept coming up and up, over and over. But this meditation took me deep while awake, and then took me into dream, while I alternated between lucidity and full-on dream state and forgetfulness of earthbound ego awareness. This time, instead of brilliance, I delved deep into the shadow.

I have tended to see awakening taking on this kind of cycle; a moment of brilliance followed by a deep dredge of the muck as though one serves to bring up the other. It isn’t perhaps why many people misunderstand the power that awakening contains. It’s not all rainbows. It is more about clearing, cleansing, and it can be hard on you to do this kind of delving. I know it’s not fun for me….but it always comes with a reward that is forever reaped, an inheritance that remains perennial.

I slipped into the deep state. This part is the easy part. It’s being able to remain lucid enough inside such a deep lovely swirling eddy of energy and not lose consciousness, especially when it’s at the end of the day and you are ready for bed. I remained neutral, not seeking to do anything since the intention was already placed. I just had to wait for the subconscious and higher self to do their part. I was along as a witness to what would unfold. My cat lay next to me, again, purring softly, a few snorts as she drifted either deep or up out of her own deep sleep. This time, she would project right into my lucid dream, acting as a reminder to remember why I was there.

I wound up inside a dream. It was night and I was walking around an old house that I remembered having dreamed of years before in another shadow work dream at an earlier stage in my progress. Nowadays, dream imagery and its meaning tends to be much more direct or understandable than it ever was before awakening. For me, a house represents the construct of human consciousness. It is an image that Jesus often used, too, and it has been a consistent image each time I dream of it. In one dream I might be in a house, in another, a warehouse, or in one, I stood on the streets of a city as I observed the roots of some massive tree or plant that was growing in a large building, revealing its roots as it emerged through cracks in a deep stairwell….an image that spoke to me of the work that remained to be done in the root chakra, the foundation.

Last night, it was that same old haunted house. It had the weight of ghosts, of lives and people who had lived inside of it and now it lay abandoned. A moment of lucidity began to build and I felt myself dream while kicking into meditation all awareness simultaneously. The last time I was here, the dream ended with me discovering that I could lift up into the air; a clear indication of my letting go and allowing the organic force flow through me. I lifted up into the treetops. This time, though, I was solidly grounded. I pondered what else was there to clear out, to resolve in this tumble of an old home? It was in its own slanted way, a great life, but it wasn’t my life today, but one lived a long time ago. All of this was emblematic of the work I had left incomplete in that previous life, and here I was, having to set it right, to give it that moment of forgiveness it so needed in order to be free.

The house lay in a depression, between two sloping meadows. It must have been a lovely sight in its heyday, but it was lying in moonlight and was ramshackle. The large wrapping porch had sunk in, taking a wing of the roof with it. You could see into its interior and as I made my way around it, I realized how much it lay in shadow. “If there is to be light here, I am the one who must bring it…” I realized.

Just as I thought this, I felt myself lift and the dream fall away from me. I was warm in bed, and only had a moment to ponder as, like a swimmer, I went right back in, grabbing a quick breath as the waves of sleep lapped over my head and everything went muffled and I lost ordinary waking consciousness, trusting that I would find myself again on the other side.

I was walking in yet another building, another old house, and this time I was inside it. There was no light, and windows down the hall and into a large outer room were painted over a kind of greenish color. Drapes hung in tatters, and there was a drip of water that made a smacking sound as each drop filled a puddle on the wooden floor, now a wash of sepia in the dark of the night. I remembered this house, too. This was one I didn’t like at all. It looked like it hadn’t been lived in in forty years. Nothing was bright about this place, it had a dank and decaying feeling to it. I kept walking though, wondering if I would find something that would mean I had broken through to something. I noticed kitty was with me. She has a name, but she knows kitty best. Sometimes she is monkey, sometimes Georgette. There she was, her tail flicking upwards. I could hear her thoughts, wondering why we were here, then immediately realizing that she was in my dream. She settled in after that and began following alongside me with less trepidation. She predicted that we wouldn’t be here long,and she was right. I surfaced yet another time out of sleep and felt my deep breathing. It was like being awake, but feeling the spell of dreaming still all around me.

The answers didn’t come in the usual fashion. So much of these places represented aspects of myself from the past, mostly distant, unresolved, lying unseen, needing badly to be seen. They had a surrealistic quality to them. I felt that edge of…fear, dread, and yuck about it. But that was exactly why I had to go back into these old haunts. I wasn’t there seeking to do what a guide once admonished me never to do, which was to try and drag it back into my life again. No, this was different. The idea that I had to carry the light into these darker corners was what this was all about.

Awakening is ruthless. You can’t bullshit yourself. Only when it’s completely clean, clear, forgiven, can things be forgotten. Until our inner compass is satisfied, we wind up going back to those places to sweep that little remaining bit of shadow away. I felt like I was ingesting it, taking it in so that I could metabolize it into light. Kitty stirred and looked at me through blinking eyes, sleepily, her head up, then back down, nonchalantly falling back in for another round of sleep. This felt like it was turning into a tag team wrestling match, dipping into lucid dreaming using meditation as the launching pad.

I kept at this all night in a marathon of visitations, never knowing where I would end up next, but in each case it was some long forgotten building, some old remnant that I have inherited in this go-round and am tasked with emptying of what is less than it’s best. Like  a big cleaning. You know how it is. You pull out the big stuff and haul it away, and with each time you go back, the particles get finer and finer until you go from sweeping up the last bits to wiping up the dust. This is all old business, an old self, a past life, and it’s now being brought forward.

I thought about that first house I dreamed of in the months before awakening came. It was all so much brighter, more optimistic. A road led up a hill with a creek running beside it. The creek grew stronger the closer I got to its headwaters, which revealed how this wasn’t an ordinary body of water. It was prana itself, filled with symbols and brilliant. How could water be so bright? Climbing the hill, on the right, was a beautiful arts and crafts meets Zen monastery. Built from large beams, the building interlocked, revealing its construction. Stone rose up through its middle, and when you walked inside you could clearly see two fountains inside, split down the middle, representing the Ida and Pengali currents with the Shushuma in the middle. That was my house, my temple, a place that was more than just home, but was who I was. It still is. But since that time, I have had to venture out into the past in order to heal it and cleanse it. Actually, I can’t even say it is I who does this; clearly my earthbound self isn’t up to this, but something deeply rooted in me is. It is this part of me that teaches, reveals, redeems, and ressurects. I wish dream could be brighter sometimes, but there are plenty of regular dreams that are, and besides, digging into shadow always resolves some deeper sense of feeling ill at ease in me.

It would be great if I could offer some grand finale, but an ending is itself a beginning, a new thread is discovered and it’s then followed through until something big is exposed from the rubble. Another chapter is begun even as additional chapters emerge. Over time, what I have found, is the gradient becomes finer and finer. It actually gets harder to keep the shoulder to the grind stone sometimes. It’s easier…the energy is less turbulent and it doesn’t stir me in the same way. But what I also find is that in some ways it’s a little easier simply because so many blocks have been removed. The blocks have gotten harder, but the level of confidence has been forged in the flame of awakening. As if that makes any kind of sense, right? The easy stuff came away first, and when I put myself into energy work like Chi Gong, material cascaded away, and this continued for years. Thousands of blocks, I figure, big and small, always burrowing down deeper and deeper.

For me, the hardest blocks lay deep down. For me, the root was where the hardest wounds lay. And despite all of this, I was able to manifest truly remarkable opportunities in my life, and when I was ready, events have simply fallen into place. When I was ready to fund the next phase of my life after a collapse of the markets, I waited, keeping my wealth in assets I could relate to, which was real estate. Even though I saw half the value of my property evaporate, it also came back during a confluence of events when I was ready to make my next step. Wanting in truth to sell directly to a buyer instead of a realtor, my soon-to-be realtor cancels when she gets too busy with a market which suddenly was going crazy. Deciding to sign papers for representation in another three days, I’m contacted by a family who heard through the grapevine that I was going to list my house soon. They asked if they could buy it directly from me, an outcome which I had wished for in my heart. While taking a nap hours before I would speak to them on the phone, I see them in a meditative state, not knowing that they would be talking to me later that day. Before I was set to sign papers with my realtor for representation, they brought a contract. I was able to sell to a family who had loved my house for years and were having trouble even seeing homes because of how hot the market had heated up within months.

Now it might be a big question what this has to do with my work. What I have found is that as each block is removed, so too are the blocks to manifesting the events in my life that support what needs to come next. This isn’t for me about chasing wealth, but finding my own inner abundance, which is less about money as it is about opportunity and helping to make others lives better. There is so much feeling of loss and lack, and for years I too fell for this feeling. But often, the things I chased after weren’t the things that would have been good for me. That was why they were hard. What is easy comes like magic. These things emerge in perfect timing. Life is increasingly different as the years roll, and as the air clears. Life is more a series of serendipitous events that have purpose and flow, pushing some old block to the surface, or leading to the next step. Something bigger is in control. That might sound superstitious, but it’s not. As division falls away, there is a marriage of the small self with something larger within. This is about bridging the gap and clearing the way for this to happen, and it’s not done halfway or half-assed. How’s that for mystical musing?

Whatever it will be for you, getting out from underneath the tangles holding you back, is what brings the change. For now, the work continues, and who knows what is around the corner.