A Way To Bear Change In The World

When I was young, I was fascinated with the story of the Hundredth Monkey.  It was a cool story to consider as having truth in our world, a hitherto unknown force that works behind the scenes that brings significant change.  When I experienced kundalini I was taken into worlds of knowing that I later read about as being a fixture of this experience for many.  They called it “secret” knowledge, but in truth, the only thing making it secret is how we ourselves are balanced within us.  Two sides, one of which can plumb the infinite. The liberation of kundalini in me was a liberation of my awareness and the two energies which I felt side by side, in an embrace within me, long before I even had a name for this thing that had gripped me in its embrace. This was itself very clearly the union of two seemingly separate forces that had somehow managed to break through some cognitive barriers I had erected that kept the experience out of my awareness.  That’s the only difference between me and anyone else who still lives in Kansas.  One of the clearest and most persistent understandings of how this universe within me worked and does work is that while we have a linear side to our energy and thus our consciousness, we also have a nonlinear side to us as well.  It is that nonlinear side, the yin, or divine feminine, that cracked me open in degrees, a force so strong that it felt literally like a tsunami wave.  What it brought was a knowing.  Back then, seven years ago, I looked up into the night sky and I could FEEL all of the people who were waking up.  At the time, I didn’t even know it would turn into a global phenomenon.  I didn’t know that there were waves of us being swept into this new experience and that I was part of them.  What I knew seemed at first fanciful to my old mind…the one which used to live in Kansas….on the one hand I knew this in my bones but my rational mind did not know how I could have such an idea like that unless it was as true as the northern star.

While we are so often used to how we normally experience things here in the physical, let me suggest to you that there is an entire world of effects that are based on an opposite or “reverse” method for how our rational minds tells us that events can and do come to pass.  We are most often used to an experience that shows that if anything is to be done, we must get out there and do it ourselves.  But no, wait, there is this other side.  We don’t pay it much heed because it sounds entirely magical to our limited rational brains.  Silly even.  It is nothing short of miraculous and serves as a way that great change can be at the very least potentiated within the core of humankind.  It is nothing short of the Hundredth Monkey.  In the words of Kate Bush, “Just saying it could even make it happen….”

We think we are separate but this is not true.  We are in fact bound and connected through vast energetic ties that connect us on many levels one to the other. We have connections to the planet, to the atoms around us, to people we know, to people we have never met yet who we meet in dream to do important work.  Maybe that seems fanciful, or merely incidental, but it is in truth not.  Even the atoms have in them what we have in us, from the smallest to the largest, and this thing is in everything.  It ties and connects, it makes everything run with the same common waters.    We just don’t see it or taste it, but it is there.  It is possible to feel it, to even experience it, and we do this through consciousness, the very thing that scientists use without realizing it to see and judge the world and turn around to say that this part is not trustworthy.  Silly, right?  We live in a sea of electromagnetic energy that binds all of us.  It is George Lucas’s “Force.”  When you awaken, you don’t just awaken to MORE energy, you also wake up latent senses within you as well as increasing your awareness of the capacity of these two forces running inside of you in greater amounts.  And this energy brings awareness.  Not always total awareness because you cannot see beyond your own current karmic entanglements that currently exist within you.

We have all largely been shut down in regards to the right side or yin energy that moves in our consciousness, and it is this energy that is NOT linear and has the power to move mountains for the very fact that it is part of a wave instead of a particle.  By being able to tap this side of our being, of consciousness and even of the forces bound up in the atom, we can actually leverage ourselves significantly.  How?  Well, just thinking it, hoping for it, then letting that thought go out into the universe actually DOES have an effect.  Most people are too asleep to even see how their thoughts are creating their reality.  I know because I was one of them.  I didn’t have enough observation to even pick up that fact.  I knew it only as an idea I knew was true.  Now, I do not live in such ideas as I  live in a world bound by forces that I see in operation every day.  The world is as you are.  Belief is the combination lock to what is possible.  Being aware that YOU are waking up and FEELING this energy on the planet, then, is huge.

The more you can feel into it, the more you can let it flow, the easier it becomes for others to flow also. Just by becoming aware of a new wave within the wave, a deep and secret realm of feeling also makes it possible for others to stumble across it (quite by accident, you know….).  The power of this side of our awareness is really huge for us and it represents one important way that we can help bring change. I know that this is so because concepts that had not been entertained before in any printed format are emerging almost in perfect timing with one another. At the time I wondered if some writers were reading my work because what they were describing were concepts I had come across within myself and through no other outside agency and which had not existed prior to all of this.  What I suspect and what I feel in my bones is that we can and do harness the limitlessness within us when we do this and when we do, the effects are significant. All of these things are swimming in these waters.  We pluck them like fish from a deep sea.

It may sound or seem like a lazy person’s path to change, but I promise you that even though you do not see it or taste or touch it, its effects are nonetheless real.  Just by having enough people who can feel and plumb a given depth will mean others will wind up reaching that place as well.  When you wake up you wake up to the awareness that all of this is connected at the most intimate of levels.  The awareness alive in me is now the Collective Consciousness of humankind.  THIS is my consciousness now.  Like a vast sea, I feel all of it. One giant voice that are all voices.   I got there through a series of releases of old material that moved me from uncertainty to certainty.  Instead of seeking to change the minds of scared humans caught in the old paradigm, I simply pray and focus and meditate in order to serve to bring energy to new levels within us.

I have seen how what one does can heal others.  I have come to the conclusion that this effect can be seen in the healing method called Ho’oponopo.  Dr Hew Lin, a practitioner of this method was able to heal others simply by healing himself.  He did this by simply picking up the files of patients in a mental hospital and healing whatever it was that was in him so that it could change the outcome for the people whom he had never even met. The result was miraculous change.  People who were considered lost causes were moved out of the hospital. the idea is that we all mirror the world (this is the connectedness I mentioned earlier) and when we shift something in us, the healing of that cord releases tension in the lines all around us and can free everyone we know (potentially) to experience change themselves.

Honestly, you do not need a practice.  Holding this knowing inside of you like a great energized secret is really what I sense deeply makes the most change.  The Wave represents a form of intelligence in the universe and it knows what to do.  Just let it do its work.  Be a vessel for it.  Just saying it could even make it happen….

Advertisement

The Simple Path To Flow

Two currents reside in your awareness, your body, and the universe.  We call them yin and yang, Shakti and her Shiva.  This is so because when we let go and allow them to be in us, it results in bliss.  To do that means letting both sides flow.  Restrict one, you effect both.

So let me suggest very certainly to you that we humans do not realize just how much we have choked off the yin side, the feminine in us.  For centuries.  This has had a big impact on us, but like frogs which boiled in water, the effect was gradual and we just never noticed it. We do not notice it even now.  We just don’t know how things are changed by having more of the subtler and more fluid flow of the yin in us.  But when you do this, when you let this side flow in you, it has huge effects for you.  The feminine current in your flows up one side of your body, the left and then flips when it reaches your brain or crown.  This sends the current of the feminine flow into your right brain.  Learning about HOW the right brain feels is knowing this flow. the right brain is not the linear processor that the left is.  It is not limited.  It can take in VAST amounts of things and details.  Research into brain function has shown that when people have left brain functioning impaired, they experience mystical states, develop incredible visual memory and can do incredible calculations that are on par with “Idiot Savants” (and is a term I find distasteful).  It seems the left brain serves as a controlling filter for the right which has no such limits. And isn’t this so very feminine?  I mean, who else is able to take a spark and turn it into a world, a baby, in nine months?  Amazing when you think about it.  Well, in a very similar way, a conceptual and feeling way, the feminine or yin in you can achieve similar results.  To do this, though, you HAVE to let her flow. Balancing the flow can lead to orgasmic energy within you.  This is a very good thing because of how healing it is.

Let yourself FEEL.  Don’t be afraid of your feelings.  Many people try to control their feelings for fear that they wont be able to keep a grip on themselves.  I say let yourself go.  Let yourself go some, and let the carpet unroll.  Sure, in the beginning things might feel chaotic, but a curious things happens when you give yourself the freedom to feel; you return to a kind of point of stasis.  For everyone this point is different.  After years of living a controlled rigid emotional life in some respects, you might need some significant unrolling. So let it go.  Eventually, once the rougher energy is worked out of you, a more peaceful land will emerge.  And the plus is you will most likely have learned how important it is to cultivate a more balanced self that includes this other side you have been ignoring.  The great thing is it can actually lead you when you are uncertain of where this will all end up. Really!  But allow yourself to flow.  Allow yourself to not always have the answers.  Allow yourself to FEEL the answers.  Some answers are arrived at through non-rational means.  Give yourself the opportunity to feel this and do this and be this.  Your mind wont be thrown into disarray, and if it does initially, the ship is merely learning to right itself.  Trust your process, and welcome the divine feminine, the yin, the right brain, into your life.  Sometimes the best way to solve a problem is through non-rational means.  Some things are just that kind of a mystery. the left side wont ever be able to work that issue out in any meaningful way because of how it is built.

So instead of thinking it, you will FEEL it. It will tend to happen that you can do odd things like BREATHE in peace and contentment.  The left brain says “WHAT???”  but the right brain smiles knowingly.  “But of course, that makes purrrfect sense!” she says.  And it does.  No way you could ever really breathe in the universe through your nose and yet, it happens because with the feminine, these things are commonplace. Letting HER show you the magic way is one really great way to expand and potentiate your consciousness whether you are a man or woman.  As a man, just being near this kind of spiritual fire is real nice.  What will YOU discover with this world within your reach?

Atlantis Discovered?

Photo Credit: http://lucas2012infos.wordpress.com/2013/05/31/suzanne-lie-atlantis-found-31-may-2013/

Plato mentions it.  The Olmec had a name for an island that sank beneath the sea with a very similar name; Atlanticu. It was described as a cataclysmic event.  Is it possible that we have found some pyramids off the coast of Cuba?  Well, if the information coming in is correct, as a result of some changes in the plates along the North Atlantic region, a portion of what is now known as Cuba may have been a larger land mass with……ancient urban structures.  Pyramids, possibly. I am always cautious about these kinds of things, rushing to judgement before all the facts are in, but some very interesting, tantalizing, details are surfacing.  One source indicates that this is actually a DELAYED discovery; these structures were found just before the Cuban Missile Crisis and have been put on hold every since.  But information coming out now is suggesting some interesting details which will be forthcoming, hopefully, in the near future.  Until then, we can dream…..

The most recent discoverers, Arclein and Zelitsky,  explain that the area that is below water corresponds with geological changes that could have taken place at the end of the last ice age, a date that places the structures in a time period before the Egyptian pyramids.

Arclein  explains: “when large portions of the Mid-Atlantic Ridge also decreased including Lyones and islands and land mass around the Azores. Even if this has not happened, this collapse was big enough. “This would have produced an orthogonal pressure forcing the collapse of East or West. Since the cord between Cuba and Yucatan is the natural point of weakness between the subsidence of the basin subsidence Gulf and Caribbean basin, naturally gone deep. The driver of this was the hydrostatic changes caused by both the original cortical change 12,900 years ago I called the Pleistocene Nonconformity and slowly lift the basin of Hudson Bay prompted by the end of the Ice Age. “

According to the BBC:

In July, the researchers returned to the site with an explorative robot device capable of highly advanced underwater filming work.The images the robot brought back confirmed the presence of huge, smooth blocks with the appearance of cut granite.  Some of the blocks were built in pyramid shapes, others were circular, researchers said.  They believe these formations could have been built more than 6,000 years ago, a date which precedes the great pyramids of Egypt by 1,500 years.  “It’s a really wonderful structure which really looks like it could have been a large urban centre,” ADC explorer Paulina Zelitsky told the Reuters news agency.  “However, it would be totally irresponsible to say what it was before we have evidence.”

The duo hope to return to the site, which is off the coast of Guanahacabibes Peninsula in January of next year.

 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/1697038.stm

 

A Modest Approach

If you know  what I write about, you know a lot of it has been centered on how to escape the maze of karma.  Before my awakening, karma was one of those heady concepts that seemed over my head and out of my control.  The cycle of reincarnation, destiny, journey of the soul, those kinds of things.  And yet, when awakening took hold in me the force which some want to call kundalini had the very effect of removing the karma by removing not just the blocks that kept the energy from flowing, but the conceptual biases, the beliefs, which had kept those knots and blocks and  the karmas in place.

We are all littered with little programs that run in our awareness which are the result of different beliefs or biases we have taken on in one form or another and these in the aggregate serve to form what our karma is all about.  Yes, karma is defined as “action” in its most simplest form, and while this is a very good way to explain it, my experience has been that this action is the result of certain positions, ideas or beliefs about HOW we think things work….and for the negative karmas, that means that we feel the world works against us not for us (and then this notion serves to guide our actions henceforth) for example.  Beneath all of this is a sense which is in all people that has served to remove us from our own divine natures, a kind of deeper notion or bias about how we feel things are that isn’t really true but becomes true because of how the law of attraction works; you create your reality and then the character of that reality can serve to attract others with similar qualities of energy and consciousness and feeling.

Instead of just feeling our divinity, we have allowed this clutter of  programs to proliferate that get in the way of our own purer awareness of what we are in our root, primordial, or authentic selves. The Zen teachers who tell the story of the student staring into a pond that has a lot of pond scum obscuring its depths is THE image of what I am talking about.  We can’t see the depths because we have too much in the way to even see it.  Remove that, and the view begins to clarify.  The curious thing is that when you do this, you also wind up seeing into the rest of creation from the inside out.  For people so used to using just their physical senses, this is nothing short of an epiphany.  And for most people who do awaken, all of this is a bit of a process so that one day one layer is removed while on another day another layer is removed.  Slowly, or perhaps quickly depending on how you define “slowly” and “quick,” your view begins to change.  You still see the same view, but your awareness has changed.  What has changed is that you no longer have these beliefs and ideas that serve to keep you from seeing the real deal.  the other thing that you might know about me is that I do little about creating systems and methods and more about speaking into the essence of a given thing since that is where I think I am best able to reach the problem or issue in its origins, its essence.  But for this entry, I am going to make an exception.

So let’s talk about seeing what is there instead of seeing what we think we see (or what we feel we see).

I have known many people who have each helped me to understand how this works in the world.  At the time, the experiences with these people were all hard and this was learned at great cost because it meant that I experienced how their schisms affected me, but that also meant that I got to see some things up close, which has its benefits. What I had was a front row seat watching how people were interpreting what it was I was doing (which was effectively reading into my actions their own interpretation of what was going on inside of me).  If I worked long hours, this meant I was actually wanting to escape my family in order to work in my business.  I didn’t care about my family and preferred my work instead.  Now I know how I feel.  This is not a big mystery.  I could hear all of these sorts of things being said and I know just how far off the mark they are.  This was really more about HOW someone felt things were instead of how they actually WERE.  Truth was, had this person actually KNOWN how I felt, she would have used that as her guiding principle instead of making all kinds of assumptions that were incidentally factual, but in reality not true.

To add more depth to this picture I will say that I was all along expressing how I felt.  When we have our illusions wrapped around us, we literally become blinded by these things that we are so invested in that they seem to make up the whole of our reality.  It is easy to say this is the result of the false self at work, and while in a way this rings true, in other ways I find such words or terms to be distortive.  This is NOT a false self, it is an illusion, a pure creation of ourselves which we then most often project in perfect Jungian style onto the world.  We use people and how they seem to us as we look at their behavior through our lenses of illusion.  It is just as true that my life as an artist meant many long hours.  I was the maker, the packager, the webmaster, the accountant, promoter, and salesperson, shipper, and receiver.  I was the finisher of the work, and I designed the displays that helped sell the work.  I developed new work, I supported the work that was more mature.  I had to hustle and the day did not fit into a neat 9-5 regimen like most people’s lives.  None of this was a mystery, none of it was any surprise.  It wasn’t like what I did was a big mystery to anyone.  THIS is how deeply we can hold our illusions about what we think or feel is true.

What kinds of illusions do you live under?  What colors your world and life?  What keeps YOU from seeing the clear light of day?

The path through awakening is most often one that leads to a place of neutrality in a sense, a removal of the lenses and thus the ability to see all sides and to see how the sides are or are not distorted by these self made lenses.  Now, having said all of this, the reality remains that I attracted a person like this into my life who was like this, so in all honesty, it is easy to point out the mote in my neighbors eye whilst ignoring the mote in my own.  Continually pointing out the problems in the world or in others is actually a waste of time because the most productive thing you can do is to take care of your own stuff.  If you find yourself continually focused on others’ ideas of you or feelings, then you simply are not focused on your own inner garden.  In this way, yes, there is a certain importance to taking care of YOU first.  It is madness to assume that by being a servant to everyone else is going to naturally lead you to a life of spiritual abundance when your bucket needs to be repaired.  You just wont really ever receive any lasting satisfaction from trying to fill others’ buckets with your own leaking like a sieve.  So you heal your own fractures first and then suddenly the light and life begins to fill you.  You no longer point out the problems of the world simply because you feel so full.  When you feel so full like this, you do not feel lack or loss.  You only feel……full.  Imagine a world full of people working from this side of the equation, of inner abundance instead of running around pointing out the problems in others, which is only pointing out your own short comings in a rather backward manner (via projection).  The curious thing is that if you have a leaky bucket, you will find yourself surrounded by others just like you.  Fix your own and you will find others around you doing the same.  It is a scheme that works very well all the way around.  You can heal the world by healing yourself.  Heal your own fracture and you often find the same happening around you.  This sounds like magic, but it is a common feature of how this kind of work goes.

Not to belabor the point, I will give you a quick example of what I mean.  I read somewhere someone who was quoting something from Ram Das’s Be Here Now.  His teacher and Das were talking about how his old teacher’s students were not catching on to a certain teaching that the teacher had espoused.  Das was one of these people.  He wondered aloud to his teacher why it was he was unable to embody this important teaching.  I forget exactly what this teaching was, but the specifics of this wasn’t the point.  What was the point was that his teacher observed that the teacher had not himself fully embodied the teaching.  The teacher probably heard that something was a good idea and thus he passed on the good teaching. But the teaching was not really part of who or what the man was, so he quite naturally attracted people who could not embody the teaching either.  This is what I mean, and if you think this is magical thinking, this happens ALL THE TIME and is most obvious when you have a way to observe what someone says and what they do.  Eventually you will, if given enough time, be able to observe if the teaching has sunk in and is part of who the person is.  Without that, the Law of Attraction works perfectly.  On the other side of the coin, having a teacher who then is able to embody a given teaching can result in freeing up all of the people s/he taught this teaching to to also embody it.  When we heal ourselves, we offer an opportunity to the world we have created to also heal.  So in this way, healing yourself is actually very huge. Its just not as immediately apparent to most people, but it is nonetheless how things work.

Being caught in our illusions is a bit like how someone makes the assumption that fire trucks cause fires.  Now we all know that is preposterous, and yet, it IS true that fire trucks ARE at an amazingly large number of fires, so it does make a kind of sense that they could be construed to be involved in creating them.  But in using this example, I am trying to underscore what we all tend to do at one time or another about the events in our lives.  In the words of the writer Anais Nin, we see the world as we are instead of as it is, and it is this tendency that leads not only to misunderstandings, but it also leads to suffering because, well, its so far off the mark of what is REAL.  I would later meet someone with the same kind of karmic issues as my (now ex) spouse who would make even more difficult statements that had to do with how I abused my students, how I manipulated people with my new-found powers.  It was all pretty crazy to me, and yet it all had a basis in something that existed before I even came along.  I had stepped into a karmic merry-go-round and was experiencing something I had not yet cleared from my consciousness.  When I saw and heard these things being said, it was hurtful, yes, but it also showed me so clearly how people describe a world that they FEEL is happening rather than what is really there.  We have this habit of not stopping and actually looking at things from a dispassionate perspective without bias and belief playing into the moment, and this is how a distorted world view emerges.

All of this is the result, I contend, of just what Buddha was so famously known for espousing, which is how expectation plays into our own suffering.  Instead of expecting something that is realistic from people or events, we choose to expect what we feel we desire.  This is actually based on something NOT realistic at all, but actually forms our own karma, the thing that serves to cloak our own divine selves.  Some desires are  soaked in karmic issues and so will not adhere to what is real but will speak instead of something deeper inside of us that also happens to be unresolved and most often, volatile, hurt, and broken feeling.  All of this material is brought to bear in the moment, at least potentially, so that our desire governs our actions and feelings instead of our being able to see what is there.  So instead of accepting what happens, we kind of fight with outcomes so they serve to make us feel bad or hurt because we feel we did not get what we wanted.  But what we wanted was itself based on these memes, the beliefs that we have floating around inside of us, and this all traces back into our karma.  There is a reason for all of this and you CAN release all of this in time if you want to go that deep, but for now, a more modest approach to keep things simple.

When you enter an experience, stay open to what is happening.  Try not to put too much investment in an outcome.  Try to simply go with the flow and make your mind up in the moment about what you want to do for that time.  This will keep you from leaving THE MOMENT.  A curious thing happens when we leave the MOMENT.  We begin to imagine and our imaginations naturally form based on our beliefs and inner Karmas.  Try to shorten that and keep yourself in the here and now. I know how hard it is to keep imagination out of it, I am myself highly imaginative, so it’s not easy.  But try it.  You might feel like this is just too passive an activity.  I am not suggesting that you not voice your opinion or just go along for the ride, but rather to observe the moment more and give yourself some time to really feel into that moment and into what it is you feel that you want.  Before you make your decision,  ask yourself if this is really what you want. This is not something you have to agonize over.  But over time, by doing this, you may find that your choices may change first in a small way and then in larger ways.  Don’t let yourself fall into the trap of doing what you think others would have you do; do what YOU want to do.

Observe your thoughts and watch how your own thinking naturally may turn back to a sense of expectation about something.  When you find yourself doing this, stop for a moment and allow yourself to suspend this tendency, first for a moment, and then the next time, for a longer time.  As you go through each moment in life, you will find you have an endless series of opportunities to do this careful self observation.  It might not be easy at first.  In fact, it might be downright cumbersome to you.  But I ask you, if you are interested in overcoming the things that lead to your suffering, isn’t something like this worth it?

When you meet someone for example, resist the desire to pigeon-hole them.  Keep your mind open about them.  I knew someone once who identified me with her father due to one important but really incidental trait that we both shared.  The result was that I found myself being compared to her father about a whole list of things that actually had nothing to do with me, but were actually things that she had not yet reached peace with her father.  It was interesting and also painful to watch and experience, but it sure was educational for me.  Here a person had become blind to the real me and was no longer really dealing with me but someone from her past.  This is a very hard thing not to do, so it means you need to practice what is called mindfulness.  This is simply being aware of what you think and feel at any moment.  You do this through a practice of observation.  You simply allow yourself to be more in an observation role and for some, it takes some practice, but after a while it can actually lead to a nice little space inside of you that is both quiet, calm, and even happy.  It is a place of peace inside of you if you let it.

This method can work a variety of ways and you can actually adapt it to your own use, but the core of the idea here is that you stop yourself from forming opinions about things based on your first impression.  Rather, allow yourself to register those thoughts and impressions, but just don’t make up your mind about them, because once you do and ego gets a hold of it, the next step is in placing those impressions into a belief about something.  Once something is a belief, however small, it takes on a life all its own.  It is actually something that has a life of its own.  You let it drop into your subconscious self and the rest becomes more or less automatic and hard to change once set in motion unless you have a supple ego who can give up the good readily.

This is a modest approach, but is one that you can use to help change your own level of suffering in your life by being aware of the process AS IT HAPPENS that results in unrealistic expectations or expectations that simply do not fit reality.  This can also lead to a simpler life and calmer self.

Now one path through this is to actually release karma, which will result in a lessening of these expectations, but for some doing this type of karmic release may be too much to take on right now.  Besides, it is also possible to come at this from another direction without such heady  issues at hand.  Goodnight and good luck!

My Yoga

I have been an ardent seeker my whole life, but my seeking was singular in the sense that I always felt that whatever truths might exist for me to discover would be somehow found within.  I was not always like this, for when I first felt that deep urging within me, I was all of nine and knew that something, some great secret, had somehow been hidden away from me, and from all of us.  I did not know then that this secret was hidden away within each and every one of us, and so I sought to find the answer outside, in the things which were hidden or taboo.  My reasoning was that if there had been something indeed hidden, it would be likely hidden in those places where we had placed taboos on their access somehow so that no one would bother go looking.  This seemed most plausible.  By age thirteen, though, I began to sense that somehow this was not without but within.  It began with an intuition about how we sense reality and the role of the individual in sensing this reality. It expressed itself as the world not being quite what it appeared to be and fueled an almost conspiratorial sense that things were not quite the way we thought they were.  In very short order I would read a book that would speak many of these core intuitions back to me.  It was a book by Jane Roberts and her trance personality Seth who proclaimed that we create our own reality and that our sensing of reality is itself very personal, individual, and while we each see the same tree and sky, we also choose to see it a certain way.  It is this choosing that would become the basis for the undoing of so much inside of me when I experienced awakening many years later.  I did not know then that our own inner biases about HOW we though the world was would play so heavily in what I would eventually come to face.

I have, perhaps, as a result of my own journey and predilection for seeking within, have always sought the source of things and not just how they seemed to appear either directly or through the lens of our own bias, our own karma.  Bias is easy enough to overcome, but karma is harder.  Karma, though, I have learned, can be completely undone and is the greatest liberator of all, for its bias lies deeper yet within us and moves without our awareness always.  By bringing the force of awakening to the fore, it was enough to also bear awareness in greater degrees.   Surely energy is consciousness and consciousness is awareness just as awakening has shown these years.  It is also curious that we do not simply do what we wish to do, but to do what we are, what we are in our larger context, which itself is not always glimpsed in the day to day but in those often rare moments when we feel an acceleration of consciousness and begin to see things in a larger context, an undeniable one, and the self begins to turn within itself so that it sees things from a different perspective, often a more honest one.  If yoga is about union, then what is the purpose of all of the positions and methods and poses?  Its a highly developed system, and so if union is the goal, then what is it that yoga does on a physical level to feed into us a sense or feeling of union?  And what is union?  That may sound like a too-simple question to ask, but it is what I know is a question that has all kinds of realizations that go unnoticed by many for the very fact that if yoga worked so well, we would all be experiencing a deep abiding sense of union. True union resolves us back into our authentic selves, beyond karma, beyond bias, beyond what we have adopted based on a fear of how we think we should be or ought to be.  If there is a false self, then it is this self.  Otherwise, all that we choose to be is the gift we have received from the Creator which is that of freewill.  Saying something is false is like saying we are not being honest with ourselves, and if that is the meaning, then it is true.  So much of awakening is about unwinding the great cosmic spring of our vitality to find that the spring was wound the wrong way.  The current of energy reverses, the world changes, we follow a new path which others do not always understand, appreciate, or value.  Much of what we do, then, becomes a silent prayer, a silent process that is true to no other but our own selves.  The self re-learns, remakes, is destroyed to be rebuilt again, but built in a manner that is more honest, true, and satisfying.

The essence of union is the removal of all that divides you from this one thing that your consciousness rides upon, is carried by, and is a part of.  Through an awareness of self, of ego, through the left brain operations of object and self, we create an appearance of separation that only exists as a kind of conceptual construct.  But like all constructs, once erected in our consciousness, it begins to work like all constructions work; unaided and with fidelity to the rules under which it was installed with in the first place.  Beliefs are this way and if you have any question about the power of belief, all you need to do is look at how a country can move its populace to war under the slimmest and weakest of pretenses.  It is all a carefully understood process that involves the left brain and ego.  It is amazingly simple to do and it is done very well by those with an understanding of it whether conscious or not.  These things are the manipulation and creation of belief and it is ego that identifies with them and will hold onto them for the simple truth that ego is installed centrally in most people rather than peripherally.  This is why upon awakening and the movement of ego away from the central font of awareness that those thus awakened are much harder to manipulate in this way.  The old process no longer works quite as effectively.  It still works to the degree that ego rests near the center of the self, but less as ego moves to the back of the bus.  When you go through awakening the sheer force of the energy now moving in your awareness shifts and changes these beliefs and positions…..and even then, it can be a mighty struggle for some to undo the programming.  For me, I unknowingly struggled with this shift in me for many months until ego was gradually shifted to the side of my awareness so that it did not act as controlling agent in my consciousness as it had previously.  It was then that greater union was possible for the simple reason that more had been moved out of the way to allow greater flows of energy to move in me.  Simple.

But this was all done without yoga as one commonly thinks of it, and yet, all that I have done has been a constant process of it.  Every day I sought union within, quietly, silently, feeling into those places that served up a sense of resistance and letting kundalini wash away the resistance.  I will say that I did do Qi Gung as a moving method for helping to assist in removing blocks.  While we may want to think of awakening or kundalini as some exotic energy that is entirely nonphysical, it is not  It makes up everything here and is wed to the physical just as it is wed to the spiritual.  So what we do in the physical can create an effect on it just as how our thinking and feeling can have an effect upon it as well.  It is not one or the other, but both. the body is the soul IN FLESH.  Both sides of the coin benefit from the presence of life force, of prana moving through them and is the result of sound integration of it within both.  So while I know that physical disciplines can work if you know what they seek to achieve, and sometimes even when you do not, some of the methods are there to guide you to a way of feeling.  Kundalini is always here with us.  What makes the difference in feeling it is our awareness.  So how does a posture help with awareness?

As I have said, I do not do yoga, not as one would normally think of it, and yet if the core of yoga is to be known or understood, my life has been the very essence of it.  I am aware, however, of lives spent in the East.  I know that I have spent many lives in silent meditation.  All of it has helped in what is happening in this life I am sure.  But I am more than a Tibetan in Lhasa or in Angor Watt.  I have sat atop mountains in California’s Yosemite Valley and watched as the Thunder Beings moved very quickly towards me, beings that spoke of a day in the future when the earth would be going through changes, a time when the “Great Wheel comes full turn.”  It was in experiences such as these that I was shown that I and the Thunder Beings were in truth one and the same, that my higher self WAS that self and that through accelerations of consciousness (which some called “altered states” which is a term I do not like for how misleading it is), our own consciousness expands to become aware of larger dimensions of itself and of reality.  It is curious and telling that I have no other recollections from the past that served to bear such incredible flows of energy, of consciousness, into my awareness as simply sitting atop a mountain crying for a vision as that experience with the Beings in the storm did.  For me, it is a lesson to my own self here and now that by simply removing that which divides us, we may inherit our birthright, or realize it in the moment.  It waits for each of us as surely as the dawn.

All of this has led me to the inescapable conclusion of how consciousness works and how we have access to still larger realms of awareness, which is a recall of what we truly are in all of our potential.  These experiences, for me, help to form a core teaching or reminder of what we are and that as humans, we contain a lot of material that serves to block our view of this world waiting to happen to us through an act as simple as becoming aware.

In my life I have observed the function of two sides to our awareness and both of these have corresponded to the left and right hemispheres of our brain.  One side of us is incredibly restricted in what it can do and how it processes information, but it is a necessary agent in our lives.  This part of us is the left brain operation and the brain itself mirrors a certain part our own consciousness.  This part of us is necessary for being able to get anything done that is sequential in the world.  Without it, we would not know what comes next, or how to put a clock back together, make logical and sequential rationalizations.   The other side could not be more different because it sees wholes instead of parts.  It has the capacity to ponder the infinite and does.  It is not so restricted as the left but it also does not have all the answers either.  It might be able to glimpse incredible realms but it wont know how they work exactly.  That is the plodding job of the left brain.  And yet, these two worlds can be made to converge, in UNION with one another, to create a cooperative sense of realization.

When union, these two sides of us can serve to create a new synthesis.  Their union is the essence of creation.  You see it everywhere you look where opposites, attracted, merge and there is an explosion of energy.  Always.  Sometimes the explosion is destructive, sometimes we consider it creative.  And yet, when the two currents of consciousness within us merge we call it inspiration.  We see the world anew, we break ourselves out of our old conceptualizations in order to consider something different.  This merging is in no way within the box at least for that brief moment when the incandescent energy of union happens, the kind of orgasm of the mind which is the same orgasmic energy we feel when we awaken, something that is the result of UNION.  It is the same when a woman and a man make love. It is so with all forms of union whether conceptual or physically literal.  This union can happen within the self,  within couples, groups, and even institutions, all in accord to how they are made to move energy. While the union of sex may feel different from the union of the self, a similar kind of energy is created and is nonetheless just as liberating.  Energy is energy and it takes on different effects as it moves through the different wheels of our own energetic realization, which we have come to call chakras.  Even the chakras, themselves, are “lobed” to carry both masculine and feminine energies, the yin and yang.

Why My Yoga Does not Bear Kriyas

It is interesting to me that it is mentioned that those who awaken experience something called kriyas, a kind of involuntary movement in the body which is a physical feature of assisting with the flow of energy through it.  While I have experienced some of these, I have not experienced them a lot.  I have thought about this and it has occurred to me that the reason why these jerking motions have not happened so much is because my own consciousness has been focused on moving this energy within it in less physical ways.  I am aware because of my work in art that there is a subtle flow of energy and an interaction between left and right brain in order to bring about what we call inspiration. The energy is moving through less physical channels and is being assisted through the self and the neurophysiology.  I am not here to say it is preferred because I know that there is no one way to go about this, but only to point out that this is one tool that can exist in your toolbox for how to assist in e greater flow of energy through you.  Certainly, physical movement helps.  Sometimes it doesn’t even need to be Qi Gung or yoga.  Just MOVING the body helps  A nice walk, a run, or even just moving your arms around so the core of your body is not so rigid is very freeing to energy.  Because so much energy is taken up in what I’d call more dream experiences, not literal dreaming, but in subtle accelerations of consciousness, I tend not to experience so many of these jerking movements.

At a certain point, which I identify with the period of time in which the ego was moved to the side of my awareness more (to the back of the bus as I often say), I began to experience these very quiet and expansive states of awareness in which thought itself was entirely stilled.  Over time, this stillness of thought has become more of a feature of my makeup.  It isn’t that I can’t think, I do, but that there is simply less chatter and more….observation….of everything.  This was first introduced to me many years ago while I was driving late at night and saw in my inner vision a presence that was practicing this “quiet presence of mind” as he looked back at me.  I found at the time that I could not practice this same quietness of mind and found the encounter to be interesting but also beyond my ability.  In truth, I think it was within my capacity, I was simply not living a life that was conducive to that sort of thing.  But I am glad that the presence who came did at least introduce it to me.  Only later did I see the same face on the back cover of a book on Japanese Zen and in that same book the person describes the same emptiness of mind and quieting of thoughts.  it seems it is a pretty universal experience.  What I think I was afraid of was that it would empty me, that I might lose something of myself at the time that this happened. We seem to fear obliteration, and for as much as some monks and yogis seek to do just that, the self continues to be. And not just be, but it evolves as we ourselves are aware of still “higher” states of awareness where there is another identity much like our own here now, but more advanced….perhaps more refined.  The sense of self and ego is an important part of what we have created for ourselves here. However, learning to move some of it into a more harmonious position is itself  what has aided in helping with still deeper ranges of union within the self and with others.

Everything Can Be Yoga

For me, everything has become yoga, but it is not itself a physical exercise.  I do not sit on a mat, but rather I observe quietly and intently as my hands move together to wash dishes, or to make tea, or to rake leaves.  My yoga creates a space of presence that is not mental only but is like a presence that opens up the cover to a deep well where my soul enters into the moment so that small self and larger self merge and experience union within, which brings bliss.  As I give myself over, I realize that this feeling of yoga, or union, is like giving myself to a lover.  I feel the yin current in my consciousness open unabashed to show me how to open to the universe of me and the All by simply surrendering so that world womb may touch soul womb so that my yin womb may feel all of this in ladder-like fashion as heaven descends into me.  This is, you see, the secret of Heiros Gamos, the union of the two currents in us, in consciousness, in our bodies, and in the universe.  It is all of this, undivided, and yet our own consciousness, by not being in union, chops up the thread or current so it SEEMS to be separate.  When I give myself over to it, all thought stops and feeling begins.  This is why I find the words of so many teachers who speak of feeling as being the enemy.  What do these poor minds know?  The way to the All is through feeling!  And yet, unless you yourself have experienced this enough to know it well, you might be tempted to believe these very authoritarian people who have entirely missed the boat.  I suspect it is because they still are caught up in the thousands of years’ worth of paternalistic and left-brained functioning that has gripped our species for so long.  I hope that they themselves can feel this rich and delicious experience of the feminine side of their being without fear or queasiness and know that we are all like this….that you cannot experience the feminine as a male and not be able to know the All.  You can’t just feel it a little….but the more you feel the feminine, the more you can feel the ALL.  And it isn’t because the feminine brings the missing pieces, but because she has been hidden.  Its been buried under layers of denial and chauvinism for centuries, millenia.  When the yin side is opened, we feel it so strongly and identify it as kundalini because all of us, women and men, have become so used to the masculine awareness. The feminine current has nearly been lost on the planet.  And I am sorry for those women who are reading my words.  I know it might seem like I do not know the truth of your own experience AS female, but what I am writing about it the yin current, which has the capacity to bring the deeper range of the feminine experience into the world. Yes, women are here and yes they do experience a wide array of perspectives by simply being in flesh as female, but there is a vast amount of feminine awareness that simply does not exist just yet in the world.  It is like a woman holds a cup of water, which is her feminine nature and thinks that this is what she is, but what I have seen and felt is that she is a vast surging ocean, unlimited and wondrous.  If you reflect on the world and its ways, you will surely realize that this surging sea has never had any real place here because all of us, women and men alike, have been so shut down.  What matter does it make when I look at the world of women and see such vast seas churning silently and without awareness, within them?  They would all get mad at me to presume, as a MAN to say such a thing.  Truth is, we just are not aware of just how dumbed down we have become, or how limited we have been in our experience of the feminine.  And one more thing; I suspect that we have done all of this for the very reason that SHE feels so incredibly good.  Suckling at the breast without a fear in the world, feeling her depths in love, being carried away within her is pure ecstasy.  And loss of control.  Our world has been a model of control….rigid control that you don’t begin to appreciate until you feel this restless sea churning beneath you….churning beneath all of us.

So my yoga is tantra.  It is this moment by moment attempt, at least, of seeking union within.  It isn’t even about sex, but about larger archetypes and energies that we can learn from and evolve with, and how integrating this into ourselves actually changes the patterns IN OUR CELLS.  If we have lost our ancient knowledge of the feminine, then it is here in such a place that we can find it.  Silently, as I move my hands to the coffee pot, I feel the yin current move through me and I feel a stab of bliss that is like a petal opening deep within me that pushes all the petals behind it open.  It is like being taken, seduced by this warm presence that makes me realize that I can be opened entirely, taken apart entirely, loosened and cracked and given a means to flow more surely.  My own masculine is like the force that opens up ancient creek beds so that my own vital force may flow down into the sea and know itself as itself connected to still larger portions of itself.  This is my union, this is my yoga and none of it is done through any movement of the body but in a quiet realization that MUST happen here or else it cannot be realized in the physical.  And I wont say I have it all worked out, for just as a creek must join with larger portions of itself without any resistance, so too must I join larger portions of myself without similar resistance, and just as a creek learns to know it is a might river at other parts of itself, so too do I realize what I am in its larger context.  Ego is not always so agreeable, or the self so courageous.  It is like any discipline, a practice where I slowly but surely release the blockages in my own cellular and etheric memory so that I wipe the slate clean so that I might dream something anew.  Until those old programs are running, I am a prisoner in some fashion to them.

Last night I had a dream that helped to illustrate what I have known for years now, which is that it is possible to reset our inner programming and erase ancient patterns by connecting with those aspects of ourselves which do not have such patterning.  A life lived on another planet, seemingly foreign to us, could well have been lived in order to pick up an example of a template that could be used “later” by a self waking up.  Certainly our world does not have a lot of good examples for how to be enlightened.  Perhaps it can be reintroduced from somewhere else.  I am not sure that it can be found here on this planet since so much of our journey has been one of collective self loathing, manipulation, murder and mayhem.  By being able to culture a new template, we can learn how others have managed to do it and escape that very precarious position in evolution where technology begins to outstrip our own commons sense.  I think if you look around you can see the trap that our own technological advancement has brought.  And yet, we work hard to not let that impact us negatively.  Sometimes we give in and do silly things.  And yet, this is our story.  Maybe we will get our act together and grow a world that is just and compassionate and much more awake and aware of itself, its connection to all things, and how it is only existing within a small portion of its physical potential.

There is nothing more important to me than to do this, this type of yoga.  It is quiet and requires no teacher or guru, but it is true and makes me realize we all have this amazing resource at our fingertips.  It is what we seek, what we yearn for, what we hunger for and it is only as far from us as the beating of our own heart.  The authority does not exist outside of you, it is well within you and will work if you simply let it have a voice in your life.  Authority from the past may be in error; things change, we change, the world changes.  Not everything is as rock solid as we think.  Some have said what I did was not possible, to awaken as I did, and yet, thousands have awakened in just this “impossible” way.  So what voice do you listen to?  Clearly, the best voice is to listen to your own.  Have courage, it will lead you where you need to go. Indeed, it has led you to this place, reading this here and now.

What do you think it is telling you?

That Naughty Serpent

Adam and Eve driven from the Garden, by Michelangelo

    For as bad as some would like to call the serpent, we as humans sure do have a pretty healthy fascination with it.  The Serpent was in the Garden of Eden, the Serpent pops up on the forehead of Pharaohs headgear when they go to the next life, the serpent is present with the Cernunnos (pagan Gaul) with the Hindu in kundalini, and as carefully regarded ancestors within the same culture.  The serpent is present in Chinese culture as well as Japanese and South American culture.  What is so interesting is that while it may be hardly surprising that many cultures would have images of serpents,  HOW they are dealt with tends to be very similar.  All of them. In Egyptian, Hindu, Chinese, Japanese, Christian, pagan and Mayan cultures, the serpent is connected to energy, most often vital force.  There is the Rod of Hermes, the caduceus, for a few that all relate to kundalini and to vital force (and the power to heal).

Quetzalcoatl

Cernunnos with seven-pronged horn

Chinese dragon

I suspect that this image goes back into antiquity where there may have been broader communication of this symbol through many other cultures. When I was studying pre-Columbian art in college I remarked to my professor that so much of the Olmec and later work of the Maya all had a decidedly Asian look to it.  At the time he retorted that there was NO proof that there was ANY connection to Asia amongst the Olmec or Aztec or even Maya, and yet there are sculptural forms that look so very Asian that it is hard to deny the influence.  The early Olmec portraits themselves look…well, they look Chinese.  Later on, it seems as though the Olmec spread and bred with other indigenous cultures, changing their features somewhat.  When I had a lucid dream about Quetzalcoatl, it was as a form that I was supposed to project INTO.  Later upon reading up on Quetzalcoatl, I learned that the god would appear before priests of the order to take them on soul journeys, which I thought was oddly similar to just what I had experienced.  There before me was a wingless serpent floating in mid-air with the face of a very Mayan looking male.  Later, in images from the Archeology Museum in Mexico City, I saw the same image of Quetzalcoatl depicted as a serpent without wings but the face of a Mayan man.  Before this, I had always imagined Quetzalcoatl as a serpent with wings (he was, after all, the “winged serpent,” right?).

cadueceus

The challenge for some, is when the serpent becomes an enemy.  We as humans have, buried in our limbic system, what some behaviorists describe as an ancient fear of snakes, and that this is common for all of our primate kin.  Perhaps it is an instinct that has helped to keep us out of the way of the more poisonous of the serpents and we just haven’t quite gotten over it. It is also just as likely, too, that the early Hebrews, who were enslaved by the Egyptians, sought to demonize the image of the serpent which was central to their slave owners’ spiritual lives.  Perhaps that is why the serpent got the bad wrap because there is as much evidence that serpents in the Bible are also very good. The Seraphim were described as fiery serpents, winged, even, who surrounded God and whose wings beating about the central deity, shielded it.  Moses also “raised a serpent” in the desert based on an inner prompting that he should fashion an idol out of a material that is like the sun.  He cast his out of brass and it was used for healing (healing snake bites for anyone who looked upon it).  Surely this is itself a bit of magic, if you ask me, yet it slips by the early censors it seems.  And for as fearful as some modern Christians have become of the imagery of the Hindu kundalini serpent, everyone and anyone who has experienced such a phenomenon can tell you there is no snake.  The EFFECT of life or vital force pushing into ones awareness and up one’s body has a kind of serpentine effect, but that is where anything literal goes by the wayside.  It is NOT a snake.  It is much the same as me making a snake-like motion with my hands to describe an effect for how snakes move and then having someone mistake my movement for the real thing.  Which is silly.  And misguided.  At a certain point we begin to realize, there is no serpent, there is no snake, there is something that the snake represents, and making a serpent represent something is NOT the same as something BEING a serpent.  And yet, fear sometimes rules the day.  We can read stories and we do not have to believe them literal, unless that is all your own mind can conjure.  The truth is, there is a world wrapped up within this one which is far larger and cannot be explained by mere physical imagery alone, and yet, as humans, we try.  And so, we have the serpent!

Dream

I don’t often write about my dreams, so much of it seems so personal somehow, an upclose process I am not always ready to come out with.  It seems more that as I gain some distance with them that I can talk about them.  But last night I had one of those epic dreams where I was all over the place…..many places, many things, many ideas, many issues all happening almost at once.  In one scene I observed how I looked into a house and up on an upper floor a door opened out into a room that was outdoors.  Within this room was a woman draped in this large and billowing colorful cloth.  It moved and flowed in the wind in this most wondrous way; it verged on art.  As I watched I realized she was the same woman I had dreamed early in my awakening process, a woman I knew to be an archetype figure.  In that dream, I was being birthed and in the dream it helped to signal a shift in my awakening into a new dimension of issues and healing. This feminine archetype, the Goddess, was dark-haired with dark brown eyes.  I have had a number of encounters with this woman in dream as well as waking experiences.  Almost instantly I am aware of suddenly being an an auditorium sitting next to my father.  I am not myself but someone else entirely, a man of dark skin, perhaps Mexican, perhaps Mediterranean.  I am slightly younger than I am now in this life.  In this dream version of me, I turn to my father, who bears no resemblance to my father in this life and say “Why don’t you get us some Mahita….”  As I dreamed this and heard his words (I watched this all as a spectator in the seats next to the father and son, I wondered what a mahita was.  I thought perhaps this was something like fajita, that it was some kind of food, but was curious about what kind of food this might be.

Upon awakening, I began to recall parts of the dreams that I had the night before and decided to look up mahita online.  Curiously, I could not find any food references, but instead discovered a word that was the same that was an old word in sanskrit which meant regeneration.  Huh.  If this is indeed on the mark and my higher self was seeking to return this to my conscious self, the meaning of this becomes very interesting….!

Within or Without

I ask you, where is the love you seek?  Is it something that you seek in the world?  Are you on a journey to find this perfect love?  It is a curious thing to find that as long as one seeks, what one finds is itself a mirror of all of their own currently realized potentials, hopes and dreams.  We look out on the world and say we cannot find this perfect love, that it seems to always come up short, or it has remained elusive.  Somehow, in loving, we wind up feeling dissatisfied somehow.  In loving, we find we are less than able to find that deepest of places we know surely exists within us, which is the power to feel incredible ecstasy, remarkable presence that is magical that transports us to what we know inside of us is true.  Because we create our own reality, what we see outwardly is a reflection of what we are inside of us.  If we hope for love but wind up coming up short, we need only look deeper within for the cause.  When we cease looking for love outwardly and seek to love ourselves perfectly, this naturally leads to healing all of the places within that keeps us from knowing this love all around us because what the world is, is a mirror of us, even though this might seem impossible.  We must  find love to be perfect within us before we can find love perfectly from without.  Being able to realize this means doing the work of removing the competing memes and signals that exist like small subroutines in our subconscious that play throughout our day whether we are aware of it or not.  It seems I had grown accustomed to a near-constant barrage of negative thoughts for years.  I had simply grown used to it, and numbed by it.  When I awoke, this numbing down began to reverse itself so that I could feel what I had denied for so long.  While hard, it was also itself a life-saver.  Awareness is huge in learning how to heal.

I have been witness to the undoing of a vast array of possibilities and outcomes, often stopped dead in their tracks by a shifting inner world, not a shifting outer world.  As I changed, the world around me changed, and it would happen the moment that something in me shifted, healed, or was let go.  All of these little feelings that we have like “I so want to be loved, but deep down, I feel like I am somehow not worthy of it’ is just the cocktail of ingredients that leaves a person locked in a search for love but never finding it.  How can you know this love if you yourself do not first feel it within?  And what might happen, do you think, when we stopped seeking to be filled by things outside of ourselves and begin filling ourselves on our own, of seeing that we already ARE love, that we can at any time become this love by doing one thing; letting go of the fear that we carry inside of us.

The only thing that EVER scattered love was fear. We have all kinds of fear, but it all resolves back into one common source.  The journey to love is a journey within first.  Curiously, as we do this, we find the very kind of love outside that we find inside.  If that love is limited through fear, or shot down out of the sky by feelings of lack of worth, well it just so happens that this love actually also gets shot down in our lives at some point or another. Maybe we feel we do deserve love but fear more inwardly that all love ends and will go away eventually,  and allow ourselves to feel it for a time but wait, secretly, for the day when that love goes away, and so in our lives, we watch as love dies and goes away, which is itself a perfect script to the one playing out inside of us in terms of our own hidden expectations. The anxiety that things will somehow be less than perfect can lead us to meeting people who will dutifully play this scenario out with us.  It isn’t that we somehow MAKE Them be anything else than what they are, no, we simply attract those elements within a person, or even event, that matches the lack or fear within us. But in just the same way that we can fear, we can also choose to release this fear.  As we do, events begin to change.  We then begin to live a life that is not cloaked in fear ( we are bolstered by each and every release of fear so that it becomes easier to release more of the remaining material…a real plus!).   When I saw all of this in action in my life I was amazed to see how we have an ability for choosing certain people over others who will, perhaps years in the future, do exactly what we fear they will do.  And yet, all of this can be reversed and played the other way!  Just as we might play the music of our lives in discord, we can also choose to play it in harmony.  It all winds up coming down to a choice, but a choice we are not aware of making in the moment as we attract what we are inside.

So ask yourself how you can live abundantly, how your own thoughts sabotage you, and offer you up something less than what you wish for in your heart.  Consider thinking of love as something that is like a wellspring within you, a bubbling stream that flows with abundance instead of one that gets choked off through fear.  Consider that you come to life through being full instead of empty and seeking to be filled by people and things, and when you do this, you attract those things that will always, themselves, be naturally abundant.

Doing this means digging down inside of yourself and being emotionally honest.  For as much as some will say that emotion is the downfall of so many, emotion is merely the fuel for propelling you through your life.  Emotion is the cosmic propellant and if you put fear behind it, then the journey will be fearful.  If you put love behind it, it will be one of love.  Emotion is the means by which we propel  our thoughts onto the canvas of reality.  So often our emotions reflect fear and pain and worry instead of courage, joy, and love. The world is your canvass, and you are the one who paints upon it. Will  it be dark or light colors?  Once you have enough experiences with clearing old emotional blocks, you can begin to see a gradual change in how your life unfolds.  If you can get into the bigger blocks and root them out, you will see bigger changes.  It is true that some, many, blocks are small ones and we are littered with them, and that the changes in the world around us will happen in a proportional way, so it takes the very force of love within us to keep us moving.  Perhaps this is where a little faith can take you a long way.

This is not always an easy path because of the sheer accumulation of material we carry, but the truth is, you got into it, you can also get out.  I am doing this very thing, and while in some ways I sometimes wish I could have a more normal life, I also know that this life is itself pretty special.  Something in me says “You must have known you would be up for the job or else you would not be here doing this great work of your soul…”  Something inside of me must know that this life becomes the great pivot point for changing the outcome of countless other lives and realities.  Shored up by this sense, I go forward puzzle piece by puzzle piece as the scene of my being is set right.  When I first began this process seven years ago, the scene I was shown was that of a congested warehouse full of material, an “inventory” of items that was to be my work to clear out of my being.

All of the material I have removed has been all of the material that serves to compete with anything that is less than love.  At first it felt daunting to know so much existed to clear away, but now as I look back into it, things are different. There is more room to feel one thing and one thing only; love.  And the more I am able to clear those old voices of fear and worry away, there is less and less in my inner space that is anything less than love.  I am here to tell you its a process, and no I am not completely finished.  Are we ever?  It’s hard for me to really answer that, but my sense is that all of this results in greater and greater awareness of something about ourselves that the clearing away of old material helps to provide a clearer view.  Since every release has been an epiphany moment, I know that this is likely how it will always be; a  continuous resolving of awareness about what I am, how I am, and the love that exists within me just waiting to express itself.

As each competing meme or fear or small piece of pre-programmed negative material is cleared out of my light body and awareness, I find that I am increasingly more aware of a central force in all of life that is what we can align to. Some might want to call this the divine, or God, or any number of things.  While it could certainly seem to be that, I am less able to discern exactly what it is.  Maybe it is an aspect of my higher self, perhaps it is an aspect of ALL life and all being. What I do know is that I can feel my being seeking to be in closer and closer union with this force and that this one feeling is itself the central form of yoga I practice.  I do not do it through postures or methods, I simply do it through feeling since it seems to me that it is out of feeling that so many things emerge and flow.  The feeling of this central force is guiding and supportive and loving. By remaining aligned to it, my life improves.  I continue moving forward, not always knowing what is next, but anxious to know what waits for me.

Currently, there is a larger current in the world where the Collective Awareness or Self of human kind is waking up to itself.  As more people begin to see or sense this connection, they are naturally brought to the realization of how everything is connected both inwardly and outwardly.  The realization comes that all of what we see is because of something much larger than all of us, but is part of a life that can sweep us all up and raise us all up if we do one thing; choose love over fear. As more people join this current of awareness, the stronger that it gets.  It is part of a brilliant form of intelligence and is itself connected to still larger forms of awareness.  Knowing one can lead to knowing All.  It is an inner crystalline or energetic matrix that is the very web of life in the same way that your own body is crisscrossed by invisible lines of force that make up what is called your light body.  This is the force that binds all things together, and while that may make me sound like I am slipping into a Star Wars movie character, truth is truth.  This event is remarkable and can be pushed forward by each person simply waking up to a bigger picture.  At no time in earths history (and if not the first, it has been a very long time since) has there been a better time for waking up in this way.  But waking up to what?  It really is very simple; we are waking up to love as a powerful force that can carry us and strengthen us.  It is, after all, what we are in our truest sense, and is one that you get to choose!

From This Mountain

There is a notion that exists within the realm of the nondualists whereby the Void, that state of pure potential, is seen as the original condition and that everything else that we experience is somehow inferior or less than this original state.  There are a lot of high-minded teachers who have espoused this, so in speaking into it means I am coming up against a lot of people whose own experience stands in a more monolithic way for some people.  The curious thing, though, is that at the end of the day, even when we come back to the poor pitiful state of our daily illusion, of the dream of the false self as the earthly self is called by these folks, we remain here with this self.  No one seems to even question WHY this false self even exists.  Some say it is through karma that this self exists and that through this reasoning, is the reason for this kind of cosmic error in our being. To me, this is nothing different from what has taken place within Christianity as the Fall whereby through sex we must emerge here, an experience which they have considered sinful and whereby a god-man came to free us from. It is present in Hinduism and other traditions, no matter how high-minded or “spiritual.”  This sense of self loathing exists in various forms and it all comes down to much the same thing.  WE have this sense that this place, this body, this self, is somehow less than that “other” state which is pure and untouched by the vagaries of psyche, emotion, and desire.  Afterall, aren’t these all the things that have gotten us into so much trouble?

But what, I must ask, might happen, if we were to learn that the self, which some call false, was actually intended for a new way of learning about the dream, this illusion so many speak of?

The thing is, there is an application of this bias about the self vs the soul-self that seeks to suggest that those who do not agree with this notion that these folks have about the pure state or primordial state that anyone who diverges from their argument or ideas are themselves somehow not fully enlightened or awakened.  And you know, it isn’t that I dislike someone saying I am this or that, but rather it is more a simple matter of perception, perspective, and awareness.  I don’t even think that they are even all that wrong with their notion.  There is a lot about it that is entirely on the mark, except when it comes to the self. It smacks of a deep unidentified loathing for this existence that even they would deny, I think,  feeling.

The one thing that I have been afforded in this experience is being able to ride the coat-tails of the energy present in awakening whereby I have seen so many things.  I am an adventurer and I like to go waaaay out.  Down into the subatomic structure of the universe.  Down into the coding of the atom and how everything is itself holographically formulated in order to wed everything to everything else at a deep fundamental level.  Sitting deep in thought I am drawn into a revelation of how consciousness expands “outward” into larger and larger aggregations of conscious energy which goes to form our experience, then our world, and then still other realities of which we but simply are aware.  It is akin to a series of wheels within wheels (thank you Ezekiel) whereby one wheel rises to meet another which turns at a larger arc in the heavens and whose own heaven is turned by still greater and greater wheels.  At each seeming level, different phenomenon occur as a result of creative energy.  The one common thread is awareness.  In bearing more awareness, we naturally bear more energy.  As we learn to handle this energy, we also learn to handle still “larger” forms of consciousness.

I know that the makers of this world were themselves dreamers.  For them, their art was in simply dreaming such incredible dreams that we here experience their productions as a stable template upon which we exist and agree upon. We all see the same tree grow and die.  We each see the same sky, the same clouds.  And yet, the flexibility built into this realm is the ability to transform it, or seemingly transform it, by simply being….different.  And it is here that we get into something that leave those who feel that the body is so limited in the dust.

Instead of loath the body as imperfect, I see it as misunderstood.  Entirely.  Within us lies the promise of paradise, the kingdom, nirvana, here and now.  Encoded within us is the possibility for the seeming impossible to emerge.  We don’t understand how this could be because it stands, or seems to stand, so far out of people’s own limited sense about this world.  One side of our awareness is mirrored through the left brain which is a linear processor while the right brain is a parallel processor and which is VERY different from its left sides compliment.  These two brains also mirror the current of the yin and yang that moves through us and helps to enunciate their underlying truth, which itself is a still deeper truth about the form our own consciousness takes, which is this seeming dual form of awareness.  Whenever I have sought to bring both sides of my brain function into a closer unity always the result is the same; an explosion of inspiration.  This inspiration leads to all manner of new ideas, new creations, new ways of seeing, feeling, and knowing.  It is in this place where I have been taken into places that have revealed the inner workings of a vast array of things that are commonly referred to by the yogis as “secret knowledge.”  The only thing that served to limit my perception of this information and experience was how I was allowing my own awareness, as defined partly at least by my own brain function, to be.  We call this by many names, from awakening to kundalini.  When I awoke, I awoke to find that the world was a different kind of place, and that it seemed as though the world awoke when I awoke. Not coincidentally, this was a notion expressed by Buddha, I would discover just a few years ago as I began to investigate whether what Buddha experienced was the same as I had.  While where we go in awakening may differ, and while our own journeys are themselves individual, there are many common markers, which, if you know about them, you can begin to identify.

So this is just the tip of the iceberg.  A lot has not been covered, but I will leave you with this parting thought; what if, instead of the false self, we simply say that this is our earthly vehicle whose potential we are now only beginning to glimpse.  And for the world being illusion, what if we were to instead call it a creation.  By calling it this, by thinking of it in this way, we are then suddenly free to create anew, or to recreate how we see and respond to it.  An illusion itself suggests something that is false, but what if this illusion actually speaks or mirror a deeper reality about who and what we are?  And instead of the great Void as being JUST the pure original state, it is just as many have experienced including myself; a vast endless “realm” of energy existing in potential.  Now, potential is itself great to feel.  It is.  It is pure bliss.  And yet, the Creator itself is….well…CREATIVE.  Isn’t it in our nature, all of our natures, to create?   And is it not through what we create, that we have the opportunity to learn from?  For good or ill?  And isn’t this all a function of freewill, which was granted us as a central form of our being and which while it has been blamed for so many ills could also just as easily be blamed for all of our miracles and great discoveries about how to build a better world? I mean, really, isn’t this a dual world after all?  So instead of saying it is this or that, what if we sought to merge the two into a new synthesis of being and get off our high horses and learn the great secret of our being, which is to unlock the potential within us in order to realize that here we can have a paradise…..that we can wed the pure potential to the world of how that potential is realised, utilized, which is the same as it has always been; to create.  Sitting in a pure state yields only that, but it is like a boat in a harbor; it was not made for that.  Out of the potential, we draw and we project and thus create.  We want to say that creation is folly…based in desire….and yet if the teachings are to be believed, the highest form of consciousness we know, created all of this because such an act was so fundamental to consciousness.

It is known that nothing that we experience here in this less than perfect body is not registered unless the brain is able to process the information at least at some level or another.  So that sense of the Void, it is compliments of your brain.  See into the infinite? That is your brain again.  In fact, while some suggest that the brain is unable to conceive of the infinite, we are learning that there are parts of the brain that actually serve as filters and that the very process of awakening seems to serve to remove those perceptual roadblocks.  In people who have had damage to their left hemispheres, often their experience blooms into what is described as something very similar to mystical experiences had by monks, yogis and more.  Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor is one such individual who was able to observe what happened when she experienced a stroke that happened in her left hemisphere.  Speaking at a Ted Talks Conference, she described what was for me, eerily similar to what I had been experiencing during my awakening process, and illuminated a sense that I had had for years that the answer to accelerated consciousness lies in our ability to shift our focus from a left-brained dominance as a species to one that was more balanced with the right brain being given a broader expression or awareness in our own mind.  I have posted this talk before in a previous blog entry and it is posted here for you to consider.

What happens when we cease seeing life as illusion and see it as a creation?  What happens when we cease seeing the self as false and see it more as designed to do things that we currently are unable to realize but can actually learn to conceptualize by using our brains (both of them) to experience what was previously thought impossible?  Is it just possible that the real problem in all of this is that we simply have not learned to balance these two sides and that maybe, just maybe, by learning a better balance, we might learn a new synthesis that is itself evolving in human beings even as I write this?

What are we creating?

Sublimation And Kundalini

Sublimation is  both concept and practice whereby the  fluids related to sexual operation, namely seminal and cervical fluid, are said to rise up through the spinal column into the brain where they  nourish the brain and higher energy centers, namely the crown chakra.  This method, it is claimed, is a form of alchemy, a transmutation of bodily fluids into prana.  The only problem with how it is thus described is that this process is itself a biological impossibility.  Anyone who has a grasp on biology can tell you that the fluid from our sexual organs do not cross into the spinal column to go upward into the brain.  This is due to what is famously called the blood-brain barrier, and it serves some important functions (namely keeping things like seminal fluid and other fluids that ARE part of the blood system and processed by various organs such as the kidneys and the liver) out of the brain and nervous system.  This notion has arisen as a result of how the sensation feels when one is actively sublimating.  It is a vivid feeling of pressure which rises upwards along the spinal column.  Yet, there are those who express an interest in pursuing an understanding of kundalini from a scientific perspective who continue to cleave to this notion that somehow these fluids co-mingle in the way that they are felt to do.  The creation of this model for understanding predates modern medicine and scientific models from the last hundred years, so it was very probably an effort to describe the phenomenon based on feeling alone instead of anything empirical.

In his book,  The Biological Basis of Religion and Genius, Gopi Krishna states the prevailing wisdom of his time concerning sublimation in this way:

“It is sufficient to mention here that during the whole course of this (kundalini) transformation, in addition to the blood and other fuels present in the body, every particle of powerful reproductive fluid in the system is sucked up through the spinal canal to irrigate and feed the various nerve junctions and the brain. This entirely biological operation is carried out in such an unmistakeable way that even a novice in physiology cannot fail to notice it. The semen in men is now produced in such abundance that a tiny stream rises day and night through the spine into the cranium to provide the richest and the purest food for the now heavily overworked brain cells. In women, the sexual energy and secretions involved in erotics are used as the fuel. This is a perfect example of the forethought and ingenuity of nature to keep the body equipped with all the necessities to make the completion of the evolutionary process, normally needing eons to accomplish, possible in the short span of one life.”

My perspective is that as long as we use models that do not reflect reality, we will tend to misunderstand in a more precise way what is happening to us.  Ironically, the Indians and the Chinese were excellent observers of energetic phenomenon who were able to map out with great detail the channels that run through the nonphysical energetic matrix called the subtle body, the naddis and meridians, to a great level of specificity.  All of this was a masterstroke of accumulating a knowledge base for something that could not be touched, or seen, with our physical eyes, or monitored by physical devices.  And yet, we have this rather odd idea still circulating about how cervical fluid and seminal fluid are transmuted into prana through a physical channel which is simply not possible.  It is curious and it continues to be repeated.  Perhaps this is because of how the etheric body interfaces with the nervous system, that we get the sensation of something rising upwards in this way.  This is an example of how, lacking sufficient understanding, we as humans can sometimes come up with explanations that are less about what actually happens physiologically as it does nonphysically.  This is a distinction that is important if we are to learn how to determine the real forces at work when it comes to the action of sublimation.  After all, sublimation is itself a very important strategy or method for working through the issues that confront the individual when awakening becomes a presence in your life.  To better understand what is actually happening, I am going to offer to you some careful observations that I have made in my own life and offer them up to you for consideration, all in the hopes of forwarding understanding of this most important of phenomena.

The Brain Interprets

What I do know from my own observation over many years is that if the brain ever receives input from a source outside of the five senses, its tendency is to place that sensory input into a place that makes sense. This has been the result also of speaking with physiological psychologists who have all explained that this sort of things happens all the time.  There is “referred pain” as well as “phantom” sensations and what can only be considered an interpretation of information.  Now bear in mind as I do this, I am not in any way saying that this sensation or effect isn’t real, it just isn’t real in the way that many tend to interpret it as being.  Let me explain by way of another example.

An excellent example for how the brain interprets  phenomenon that does not directly exist, is by observing what happens when a sensitive sees a human aura.  This energy, which the eyes cannot see, is still picked up by the person reading the aura.  The simple fact is that the eyes simply cannot detect the particular wavelength of energy which constitutes the human aura. The aura is emotional energy, along with an imprint of the current physical state, higher spiritual vibrations and the prana body, so there is really no way to see any of this with the eyes….at all.   And yet, there are many individuals who claim to see them.  Being someone who reads auras himself, I have noted that what I in truth do when I see an aura is to feel it first.  I am actually picking up this subtle energy vividly enough that it is then translated into color light and form in a way that is consistent and highly ordered (most likely by my) visually oriented self.  When I observe very closely to what happens when I “tune in” is that I am feeling the aura with my body, with my own energy field, which interacts or reads the energy directly.  This information is then translated by the brain as something akin to a phantom image which can be deciphered by me in a way that makes sense.

When I first came across this idea that we do not actually see the aura, I rebelled against it initially, but as my own mind came to accept the logic behind it, I ceased for an entire year seeing auras.  In that time I came to peace with the idea that my brain may have been merely translating the information in the only way that it could.  After that, I began seeing them again.  I never stopped feeling them throughout this period of time, however.  There is a basis for our sensing these weak electromagnetic fields in living creatures, and we find them in the animal kingdom, most notably among those animals living in our oceans.

Similar kinds of sensory abilities are observed in other animals who have been observed as being sensitive to the weak electrical signals and electromagnetic fields around living creatures, most notably  some fish and sharks.  Some sharks have been observed, such as the Great White, to hone in on prey using a sense that is sensitive to electrical currents.  Before a shark goes in for the kill they have an opaque inner lid that comes over the eye to protect it, rendering the shark temporarily blind for the last few feet of its attack on prey.  It is this sense, marine biologists have discovered, that allows them to continue to track and locate their prey.(1)  Bolstering this observation is the fact that sharks will often chew wildly on metallic objects near boats when food is put out to attract them for study. They will often miss the food and go for metallic objects instead, chewing wildly on them. This was a behavior that biologists observed over many years and were for a long time puzzled by it, with many surmising that it was due to a shark simply being hungry and being blind as they went in for the kill.  What biologists noted, however, was that this was a fairly consistent behavior, and sharks were often seen going for metal objects that were a good bit further away from the food being left for them to eat.   Metals emit a strong electrical current in sea water, an electrical current that would be strongest than living or recently living flesh.  Monotremes, most notably the platypus, are also known to have similar abilities.(2)  This is a sense that is called electroreception, and to learn more about it you can read this article to find out more.

There are other examples of nonphysical senses that have a physical compliment, such as healers using Reiki, a form of energy healing, to sense changes in energy as hot and cold.(3)   Healers who are sending energy to clients have reported that their hands felt as though they get hot.  While some reiki effects do seem to impact the physical body through increased blood flow in the hands, there are many effects noted that do not appear to be directly related to actual physical heat.  Some feel pressure, or lack of pressure while others will feel cold.  Again, as I have sensed in my own experience, there is something I am picking up on as it relates to this subtle energy (which kundalini is said to be) which is often expressed as a kind of sensation that begins first within as a feeling that is nonphysical and “rises” to the level of a full blown physical reaction.  It may be that the brain simply does not have a good way to deal with the idea of energy being sense directly, and so instead seeks to interpret in a way that makes sense to it.  Again, the brain is known to interpret what it may be receiving through the “ether channels” of the light body or pranamayakosha.

It is extremely common in early awakening experiences for individuals to feel very real physical pain that is the result of kundalini becoming active.  I suggest that this tendency for feeling pain that is emotional in nature as a physical one, is the precise same type of translation going on when translating energetic effects into seemingly physical ones (like seeing auras). Read any account or go through the list of awakening symptoms and this phenomenon is regularly cited as being connected with kundalini.  This is, though, a nonphysical energy streaming into our awareness, if our current understanding of the phenomenon is to be understood correctly.  It has a reality, just not quite the one that we think it is.  It is a translation.

Doctors will most often point out to their pained clients whom come to see them for phantom pain, there is no observable reason for the pain.  There are many stories of people who have awakened going to their doctors to find the cause of their painful dilemma, only to be sent home.  As awakening continues to unfold, the force of kundalini most often tends to assist in releasing blocks within the energy body that also has the result of reducing this pain.  In my experience, this pain was itself a form of extreme tension that was held so strongly by the body or reacted to by the body so that it felt like pain. Upon careful observation, in every case, the pain emerged from a state of emotional or psychological discomfort.  The release of the pain always came from an ability to surrender, to let go, to engage in what can be considered a non-rational method for dealing with a problem involving buried or latent trauma, pain, or old hurt.

I will also say in a hope to further clarify to you that feeling this type of phantom pain is not necessarily universal.  Some people may only experience tensions or some kind, or a feeling of disquiet.  When I examine it in myself, when I feel pain I can actually trace it to its origins as it is being healed. In each case, it is an emotional problem that is so seemingly big or insurmountable by the psyche that it is made heroic, that is, larger than life and then turned into something else (which could be a way to entirely distort the true source of the problem to begin with).

Very recently I was reminded of how difficult this process was as I went through something poorly described as “ego death” by a reader of Waking The Infinite. It is interesting how often people in this situation describe it as feeling as though their bodies are being squeezed in a vice.  I experienced this same kind of pain in varying levels and in various places in my body as a sensation that was akin to having the bed of my fingernail being pressed very hard until it hurt.  This pain would persist for months until I was able by hook or crook, to release the old pent up block of material, after which the pain would transform into a radiant sense of joy and bliss.  I observed this same condition play out  many dozens of times over the course of a few years where the most difficult sensations of pain were released.  There are many other people who also describe these blocks in the same way, which is an exaggerated form of tension which begins to take on the sensation of pain.

My sense is that many people simply have a block when it comes to considering that something nonphysical could feel so physical.  It is my suspicion that when faced with such vividly charged emotional energy that we do the same thing that is done when there is no direct physical sense available to express a deeper truth that is taking place within the individual.  This is a place that is perhaps difficult for some people to entertain because it moves away from the physical senses, and we are anything if not overly tuned to the traditional five senses as the arbiters of our experience here on earth.  But just as kundalini will often reveal, there is much more than just the five physical senses.  But how we become aware of these nonphysical senses may create something of a challenge for some people when faced with them since they stream into awareness along untested or unknown pathways.  It may also help to explain why we wind up with ideas that seem to straddle the anything-goes world of energy with the more orderly realm of the physical.

As energy moves upwards along the charged and electrically capable spinal column, there is an accompanying sense of SOMETHING happening as the pitch or vibration of the energy is changed.  This becomes a near-universal sense of pressure, a pressure that feels like a fluid is moving.  It is my consideration that we begin thinking anew about these phenomenon and take a page from the book of the physiological psychologists who know that when faced with something outside the physical senses, we will most often have a brain that will do its level best and interpret this very real phenomenon for us.  It is just as likely that the pressure that is felt is the effect of the energy actually in the process of changing pitch or vibration as it then is passed on to a chakra center in the body that is able to sense it more clearly.  What was once a raw root energy and perhaps highly sexual is changed, and this change results in a feeling of upward pressure as the vibration shifts from a low to higher vibration.  We all seem to sense or know that the vibration of the root chakra is very different from the heart chakra and what the heart can feel is different from what the root can feel.  What happens when you transmute an energy in the root?  We all know that energy does not go away, it simply changes form.  In this case, we are the energetic vehicles responsible for the change, for the transmutation taking place.

When my third eye first activated in what was one of the more dramatic effects of an early stage of kundalini rising, I experienced a sensation that at the time I could not discern as being anything except physical, although I now know there was no possible way that it was.  In this particular experience, as I lay in bed, I felt what I knew to be someone grasping the temples of my forehead and squeezing my head for all their might. This was a very real sensation of physical pressure on my skin and muscle groups along the side of my forehead (these are the muscles that you can feel tensing when you chew, but are located well above the jaw into the side of the forehead)  At the time I imagined that some invisible guide in spirit was by my bedside doing this in order to achieve some effect.  This sensation was so vivid that I did not consider at the time that it may have had a different origin, which was as simple as a chakra opening in a dramatic way.  This happened not just once but a number of times until my entire forehead was engulfed in a series of bands of pressure that radiated out from the third eye center all the way to the back of my head. It was only after I placed my entire focus on my third eye in my inner vision that my inner sensory field exploded into a vision of a fiery eye rising up into my field of inner vision as the eye flashed from a brilliant blue to green.  You can see, though, how I could have easily thought that it MUST have been a nonphysical presence somehow acting on the physical in some unknown impossible way.  After all, how could it be otherwise?  There was no one else but me there!  What is so interesting is that one of the foremost awakening symptoms prior to full rising of kundalini is a third eye activation that results in a near-universal sensation of pressure along the third eye chakra that can often spread, in bands, all the way around the forehead to the back of the head.  And yet, for as vivid as this pressure is felt by those who go through awakening, there is simply no actual physical means by which this sensation could have been produced.  Again,  ideas like sublimation emerge due to how the phenomenon feels to us rather than stepping back and observing more closely in order to get at the underlying issue.  And for that matter, it may be difficult for some to do this.  It may be impossible for some, and so we wind up with something that sounds more like an urban myth than anything that seems logical in its explanation.  Call me pedantic, but if we are to understand kundalini in a “scientific” way as some seek to suggest they are involved in, then finding some models that fit known biological activity will need to be found.  I am just as interested in observing this phenomenon scientifically as the next person since I too have had direct experience with kundalini and would like to see some solid models developed that can help forward our current understanding.

I think that what is most likely is that the brain is an amazing device for handling an immense amount of data, but at the end of the day, it is known to interpret.  Does this interpretation fit what is possible physically?  We are surely experiencing something, yes, and it seems that our very crafty brains are doing their best to put together something that will help to communicate that something is moving upward somehow.  It may be just as likely that all of this is a sensory analog, an attempt to define something that simply cannot be sensed through our physical senses.  If so, it helps to illuminate who and what we are and also helps to guide us in understanding how we can perceive a host of phenomenon that simply isn’t there in the usual understanding.  Either way, it helps to expand our knowledge of ourselves as well as what we think constitutes reality.  This idea is itself not foreign at all in the area of those who awaken as so much of the old literature about awakening is centered on undoing the “illusion” that is physical reality.  If physical reality is itself something that we can agree is illusory, then why not something as simple as how the brain deals with sensory stimuli that is coming in through less than physical channels?

How far fetched is it that the nervous system itself has the capability of reading the bleed-throughs of this electrical phenomenon called kundalini through its sheath of insulative myaline in the same way that an electrical wire running from a speaker to an amplifier can sometimes pick up signals from the environment outside it?  And indeed, could it be that all phenomenon like mind reading, reading auras and all the rest, comes from a hitherto unknown capacity for the nervous system to pick up on these “stray” outer signals which are not part of the physiology as modern medicine has suggested exists?   For if that is possible, then it is just as possible that something like changing vibrational energy in the light body can be felt and picked up and interpreted by the brain as a feeling of delicious energy rising upwards as a fluid pressure.

To understand how spinal and cerebral fluid is produced these articles may be of some help in explaining how this has been observed in a scientific context:

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Where_is_the_cerebrospinal_fluid_produced 

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1890044/   A bit technical,  the article explains in exacting detail how the fluid is produced.

http://www.anaesthesiamcq.com/FluidBook/fl3_6.php  This brief article also explains that this fluid is protected from the blood-brain barrier.

Sources Cited:

1. Scientific American, R. Douglas Fields, http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=the-sharks-electric-sense

2.  http://web.archive.org/web/19981206164009/http://instruct1.cit.cornell.edu/courses/bionb420.07/anelson/platypus.html

3.  http://www.iarp.org/reiki-sensations.html