Several years ago I began having conversations with people who had experienced awakening. I think that while the interview is itself introductory, it also helps to cover some basic ground. The questions, though, were starting points as you will no doubt see as the interviews are underway. The interview answers have not been edited except in the case of spelling or minor punctuation or formatting issues. Otherwise, they are just as received.

My sincere hope is that by gathering this information and making it available that it will help provide insight for those who have gone through this experience and who are seeking more awareness, fresh voices, or a different perspective. Unfortunately, life has had many twists and turns and the interviews which were promised some time ago, are only now making their way onto this new page. More to come as time permits in my schedule.

If you like what you see here and find that it is helpful, feel free to pass it along to anyone who you feel might benefit. Additionally, if you would like to add your own perspective, I welcome your taking part. All interviews are treated with anonymity, but rest assured that a real person is behind each one. If you want your name shared, great, but getting this information out is of utmost importance and we all know just how unusual awakening is and the tendency for those who have not yet had such an experience to even believe that what happens is real or not the figment of an active imagination (you know the drill, right?). If you would like to take part in this project, you can send me your list of responses to my email at vitreoceo@yahoo.com with the subject heading “interview” so that I can search and find you (I get a lot of email and things can wind up getting buried).

With that, the first interview…


 

Interview with Oli

1. What was your spiritual background before awakening?

I was born in Sierra Leone. I lived with my mother who was active within our local church community and so I went to church every Sunday for the first 10 years of my life. At aged 10 my mother died and I moved to London to live with my father, who is also a Christian, and so attended Church almost every Sunday until I moved out of home at 18 years old.

Although my parents were religious, I did not feel an affinity with Christianity (or any other religion) and when I left my father’s home at 18, not that that I was an atheist but I suppose I didn’t really believe in anything.

Around the age of 24-25, I remember a particular point where I came to the decision that I would try to be a better person, try to be kinder and have more compassion generally for other people. I wanted people I knew and people I met to always remember me with good feeling. I also had a friend at the time whom I really admired for her seemingly permanently calm composure and I yearned to cultivate this virtue within myself.

I have always been very shy and also around this time, a friend bought me a book as a present, by Paul McKenna (a hypnotist). I forget the name of the book now but I used this book to increase my confidence in talking to people and it was this initially that made me realise the power of my own mind, visualisation techniques, etc.

2. Do you know if you did anything to trigger your awakening?

Yes. I don’t know if I can say that ‘I’ did it consciously, or my higher self unconsciously. I feel as though there were, essentially, two separate triggers.

I would say the first trigger was my intention to become a better person (about 3 years before full awakening) and doing my best to act accordingly. In fact, I feel it was the energy already at work in me that led me to decide to be a better person. I would actually say that, somehow, the energy triggered me!!! It was this intent that got me on the path to awakening, although I did not realise it at the time. I know I felt a calling to something but I did not know what it was and I definitely did not know that there was a ‘thing’ my actions could lead to, some goal/destination. I just wanted to lead a simpler life and handle stress easily.

I had never meditated, or practised any kind of yoga. I knew of the word chakra but could not have told you what they were. I was not aware of such things as the etheric body, etc. However I knew there had to be something other than what we see. In the year leading up to full rising of kundalini, I became very interested in alternative religions, particularly Wicca, to see if any of them ‘suited’ me. Although I appreciated my research for the direction in which it led me, I did not feel an affinity for any of them. The rites and rituals were too demanding for me and I felt that, somehow, it should be easier. I would say I became a seeker at this time.

The first three months of 2010 leading up to my awakening on Tuesday 30th March 2010 had been particularly ‘energetic’ for me. There were synchronicities happening left, right and centre, every day. I seemed to develop psychic abilities, even with minor situations. It got to a point where it was so ridiculous I started testing myself, such as what would be the next colour to be shown on the TV, or the next song to come on the radio, and I was always right. It was fun and scary! So I definitely knew something was going on but I didn’t know what! I relied on serendipity to link me with the information I was looking for. I was online any moment I could get, trying to find anything that could describe what was happening to me.

The very strange thing was I actually came across the concept of kundalini on the very day of the rising of the energy up my spine, 30th March 2010. I believe this was so I would not be afraid when Kundalini

arose later that day. I believe I came across the information I needed at the perfect time. It was not for me to know about Kundalini before, knowing about it would have meant I became lost in the “glamour” of it perhaps, and not put enough effort into working on myself, which seems to me to be key where kundalini is concerned. The timing was just so perfect.

On the day of the rising of the energy, I had been led on a specific route. I have three tattoos and one of them, the first one I got at age 17, is a snake. At the time I was young and wanted a tattoo and thought it was cool. I had gone to the parlour to get the ring changed on my belly button piercing and there was an opening in their schedule so I, on the spot, decided to get a tattoo. I didn’t put much thought into it, just picked a design out from the book they had. I had even begun to regret that tattoo because, as I got older, I felt it was too large and imposing on my abdomen. So in my search for the truth of what was happening to me, on this day I had been looking into symbolism and it came upon me that I should look for symbolism of things particular to me, and the first one I thought of was my snake. You can imagine what information that led me to!!! So this was how I came across Kundalini online, initially mostly from a Hindu perspective. It was fascinating! All the ‘symptoms’ described what had been happening to me perfectly. I had been having strange sensations in my feet and legs for many months which I had assumed was because I was resting my laptop on my legs for long periods of time. I was now greeted with the suggestion that this had actually been me feeling the movement of etheric energy up my legs! All the synchronicities and psychic events fit into the kundalini mould. Still, I was far from convinced. All the information I came across indicated that a kundalini awakening was only possible with some kind of active spiritual practice, yoga or whatnot, which I certainly did not have. I was not aware that the work I had been doing to improve myself had been my own form of spiritual practice. (If I am honest, I could have tried much harder. I believe we are currently in a time when assistance is given to make this process easier and much more accessible). And I definitely had not felt any snake-like rising of energy. This was earlier in the day of Tuesday 30th March 2010.

The second trigger (for the actual raising of energy up my spine) was the culmination of a situation in my then job where I was having problems with my boss. It is a long story which I can elucidate on if needed but I won’t now. Later, on the evening of Tuesday 30th March 2010, I had had an early dinner and was lying on my back, relaxing on my bed. It was around 8.30pm. I was going over in my mind certain events of the day concerning the issue with my boss when I had a sudden revelation about the situation. Then it seemed, almost literally, as if someone had opened my bedroom curtains onto a sunny morning. Pure objective Light was shown on the situation and my eyes were opened anew. This led to a radical heart opening followed by a powerful spiral/circular rising of the energy up my spine, I believe either from my base chakra or my solar plexus. (Please note that I came to this conclusion in the aftermath of my awakening, not during the rising process) I felt a love beyond all loves directed at my then boss. I remember crying, so intense was this feeling of love. This feeling of regret at my own hypocrisy, that I had been wanting to be a better person, to show more compassion to my fellow human in life and how, in this instance, I had gone against my own intentions, and even when assistance was given to me in order to understand the situation/my boss a bit better I used this assistance as a weapon with which to hurt him indirectly. It was the realisation of my own bad action, of my not living in line with my intentions, that triggered the rising of the energy that evening. This happened in one evening, over a period of about 5 hours.

Although the trigger for kundalini rising was the situation with my boss, the c.5hr awakening experience did move on to other themes.

3. What was your initial awakening experience like?

I’m not sure what you mean by initial. Some may consider the c.3 year period leading up to kundalini rising which I have described in the last question as the initial awakening experience.

If, however, you mean the actual rising of energy up my spine, then I would say the most shocking thing was the very physical nature of the experience. The mental/spiritual side of the experience was coupled with a very physical side, which was unnerving.

Throughout the c.5 hour awakening experience, I had very bad pains in my heart/chest. Like my heart was being squeezed. At one point later during the episode I seriously considered whether the heart pain was a genuine physical thing I should seek immediate help for. One week earlier a 20 something year old guy in my office had died of a sudden heart attack and it occurred to me I should not be complacent. The strange sensations in my legs that I had attributed to my laptop went into overdrive. My whole legs were kind of gently vibrating and powerful strong twitches made their way up the muscles and tendons of my legs and thighs. I became aware of the general physical manifestations of my main chakras (having only just found out what they were earlier that day!) and aware of the resulting effect in my physical body as energy moved through the chakras, each chakra elucidating somehow a different kind of energy from another. Strange bodily sounds originated from inside me, not sounds of my stomach rumbling or anything, but specific directional intentional sounds. I could feel so much going on in my body!!! I became extremely aware of gravity; I felt as though pinned to my bed, being pulled downwards. I do believe I was in some kind of trance and at some moments was totally incapacitated. The physical effects were coupled with mind blowing mental and spiritual imagery and realisations. I was shown in my mind’s eye visually simplistic images which conveyed massive/profound meaning about myself and the Earth, about the inter-connectedness of all life and most of all, about Love. I had never had visions before. The best way I can describe it was that usually, when something comes up in your mind’s eye, you know it has originated from you, from your own memory or your own imagination. Yet these images did not originate from me, and yet I was seeing them in my mind’s eye. The Earth was a prominent feature. I was shown how the Earth as a planet was linked and related to the energy I was feeling right at that moment. I was also high as a kite (naturally!). Despite my strange and painful physical symptoms, I felt deliriously high. I could not stop smiling. Please note that I had not taken any drugs – I had tried psychedelic drugs before and knew the feeling. My mind was brought back to the information I had read earlier in the day about kundalini rising. And still I thought to myself, “it can’t be kundalini, it just can’t be. I am not a yogi, I am not special, and I still haven’t experienced this famous rising of the energy”. And then sure enough, I was pulled downwards on my bed to maximum effect (I believe this action is so the spine is as straight as possible). And then I felt the energy; it started ‘spinning’, at the ‘base’ first, somewhere around my lower back, almost like it was revving up, before it began to rise. It was like a huge intense spiralling upward rush, not particularly fast moving but its power was felt more in its largeness and intensity than its speed, kind of like those twisty water slides you see in a children’s water park but moving up instead of down. I was locked into the experience and at the same time flabbergasted that it was actually happening, that such a thing was even possible! After the rise, I also experienced what I now know to be “channelling”. I was asking questions, big questions, and I was immediately knowing the answer, and I knew these answers to be facts. As I say, this lasted five hours or so. I can go into more detail if needed.

4. How has your awakening progressed? What year did awakening come for you?

I awoke in March 2010. As mentioned in the above paragraphs I literally became aware of the concept of kundalini on the very day it rose in me. So after I felt this very definite rising of energy and could now place what had happened to me, I began to research kundalini in earnest. It took over my life! And still does…

The first few months after awakening were a blur. Firstly in the immediate days after the rising, I noticed that others were inexplicably drawn to me. People in the office I had seen but never spoken to seemed compelled to say hello, or make eye contact with me. I was able to have meaningful conversations with others, really quite easily dropping into deep spiritual conversations with others,

even people I did not know well. It seemed much easier for me to make myself understood too. At work, inexplicably(!), my boss invited me for a chat, and apologised for his recent behaviour, and I was happy and relieved to move on. (I did not tell him about my awakening of course, or the love I had felt for him, although I was curious to know if he had also felt something while I was going through it). I was in a cloud of bliss for months and everything was amazing. I believe I also had a throat and third eye-opening in the month following kundalini rising. I was meditating almost every day without even realising it. It was very easy for me to get into a quiet contemplative state during which I would feel various movements of energy in my body. I could feel the energy every night, creeping up my legs as soon as I relaxed and shook off the day. I sucked up every bit of information I could about kundalini, trying to steer away from the obvious “new age” stuff, to really get to the nitty-gritty of it. My reading led to me to certain books which have been instrumental since my awakening and have assisted me in forming my own view of the true nature of reality. Sometimes the energy was so strong it was really scary and I would try to “snap” out of it. Apart from nightly energy movements there were other profound changes in my life, mostly to do with my relationship with my father, which had been rocky to say the least up to that point. We are now close as I never thought possible. In those first few months, I also released various powerful childhood blocks that I had shoved under my emotional carpet so to speak.

I absorbed a lot from my research. I dabbled with OBEs, curious to see if this ability was within my reach. I had a couple of incidences which I believe were OBEs. However, after one or two intentional forays into this, I decided it was not time for me to consciously try to induce OBEs. I do believe that I continued to have OBEs, however, the process was not instigated by me consciously.

I also noticed that I developed amazing hearing. I remember one incident at a party when I could hear something someone whispered to someone else, right across the room from me, and there was loud music on. All very strange. This “ability” was seemingly temporary.

I stopped biting my nails, which had been a habit for as long as I can remember.

After the first six months things settled down. By “things”, I generally mean my physically feeling the energy at night, which in those first few months was super intense and as I mentioned quite scary. I remember at one point asking for the process to ease off, and it did. So much so that even though everything was still great in my life, because I was not feeling physically surges of energy anymore, I thought it had left me for good. But moving into my seventh year now of being awake, I have come to realise that there are ebbs and flows to the intensity/physicality of the energy. I may feel nothing (physically) for months. And sometimes, like presently since the last third of last year, I am feeling it every night, with varying intensities.

5. What do you feel kundalini/awakening is in your experience?

I feel that kundalini is a switch, an evolutionary switch. It kicks of a process, both physiological and mental/spiritual which I believe takes us to the next stage of our evolution as human beings.

6. Did you have challenges with the energy? And if so, what did you do that helped you get through those periods of difficulty? Or, has it always been easy?

I have had challenges with the energy. In the above question, I stated how I had to ask the powers that be that the energy ease off somewhat, which it did. It is good to know that it is up to you how far you want to go with the energy. If you ask it to stop, it will stop. I would say that because of my faith in life and in the energy and its process, I know that challenges will pass, and that on some level they need to happen and are good for me. What I do try to do whenever I feel challenged is to have

as much quiet time as possible: no TV, maybe just some music, allow the energy time to do its thing. I am also currently trying to incorporate some kind of regular “practice” into my life.

7. What do you think makes the experience easy or difficult?

Awakening can sometimes be easy and sometimes difficult.

Easy because faith in the process means that no matter how difficult things get, I have a permanent background of “knowing” that all is well and will be well, regardless of how things may now seem.

I found it initially very difficult after the first six months after my awakening. After those heady, high few months, it kind of felt like I came down with a bang. I came down and nothing and no one around me (on a societal level) had really changed. After having had a taste of how life could be if more people saw through the lens of love, it was and still is disheartening to come across negativity.

Another aspect I found quite difficult in the early period after my awakening, and to some extent even now (although I am working on it) was fear of the energy itself. Sometimes the energy felt so strong, the feeling that this was not normal, and not experienced by most, was quite overwhelming. Letting go, especially during powerful energy surges was very difficult.

8. How has the experience impacted or changed your life?

Awakening has changed my life completely. I almost cannot remember who I was before I awakened. I think about what happened to me almost every day and how amazing and unbelievable it is. It has changed my closest relationships for the better.

The most important aspect that has resulted from my awakening is my faith. I now “know” there is more than we see, instead of having a mere suspicion. I have now no need to seek anymore. It has given me a grounding and stability I searched many years for. No matter how shit things get, I have this amazing background of faith in life, in love, in evolution and in the future, and it is an amazing feeling!

9. Were you a seeker before awakening came?

I became a seeker approximately 1 year before the rising of the energy.

10. Did you have a practice before awakening? After?

No. I do know the benefits of regular practice and am currently seeing how I can incorporate regular scheduled meditation/energy work into my life.

11. Did you employ, or do you employ now, traditional meditation practices, and if so, how have they been helpful to you? if non-traditional, could you describe them?

Essentially no. Shortly after the rise of the energy, I did try to meditate regularly. However, at that time, it seemed too easy, and I was afraid of going further than I was ready for. So I actively stopped. As previously mentioned, I do get into meditative states fairly regularly, however, I would not call them traditional. When I feel the energy is particularly strong, I have no option but to stay still, alone and quiet in the evenings and a meditative state comes naturally when I am quiet.

I would like to have a regular traditional meditation practice (independent of the intensity of the energy). I have not been successful in doing it consistently. I am aware of its benefits and when I do,

I feel the benefits. However, because I needed no “traditional” practice in order to awaken, I do not see traditional practice as the be all and end all of the process.

12. Has awakening affected your work? If so, how?

I feel an urge to do some kind of energy work involving people. I am hesitating with this path for various reasons. Although I believe I am a conduit for healing energy, I myself have a long way to go so how can I possibly hope to heal others? I also have huge qualms with charging money for such a “gift” – this is something I am working through. In the meantime, I keep at my career as a secretary in a 9-5.

13. What do you think is happening with the large number of awakening taking place today? Why do you think this is happening?

This is a really big question. I am aware of the whole “Ascension” brigade and I do agree with the basic tenet of Ascension. I do feel that a large amount of (spiritual) energy is being circulated in our corner of the cosmos, more so than at any other time. I believe this is the reason for mass awakening.

Another scenario that I feel is a strong possibility is that all the people currently awakening are doing so at this time for a reason. In other words, people who have awakened in previous lives, or those who in a previous life were on the verge of awakening, have chosen to reincarnate at this time, to take advantage of this unusual influx of energy in any way their higher selves may have determined appropriate.

I am also finding that even those who have not classically awakened (had a kundalini rising) are being affected by this energy. Particularly within the last 6 months, I have had surreal conversations with strangers and friends about how they feel something is going on but they are not sure what it is.

14. Where do you feel this all leads you, and all of us, to?

For me personally, I feel that my awakening is an opportunity for me to achieve a lot spiritually in this life. By achieve a lot, I mean getting rid of as many blocks as possible in all levels of my bodies.

On a global scale, I feel this is the start of the process that will lead us to the next stage of human evolution. I cannot say when awakening will happen in the quantity it needs to to effect real change in the world but I would say that now (time of mass awakening) is the beginning of real change, just the beginning. It is exciting!

To finish, although I refer to my kundalini awakening as “spontaneous” this is simply because I had no knowledge such a concept as kundalini existed and I had no discernible spiritual practice before my awakening. Yet I believe what I have described above was far from spontaneous. I feel it was written long before it happened. Who knew that an accidental tattoo at 17 would one day lead me to this information at such a crucial time? How can I not conclude that the momentum had been building my whole life?


 

Next are some follow up questions that I had for Oli. As above, my questions are in bold and her answers are in regular text  -P.

 

A few follow up questions, if you will humor me.  Are you finding now that you are having the same level of synchronistic events happening to you, or have they slowed, sped up, increased, or do you see any kind of pattern to how they happen? 

Definitely not the same level as in those three months leading up to rising of kundalini.  They do happen very regularly, almost daily, but now it seems very natural.  Oftentimes, I will see a symbol or a word somewhere (most recently, a few months ago, I saw a tattoo of a Vesica Piscis on someone I know) and suddenly that symbol/word will appear everywhere!  Although I had maybe seen the symbol before, it had meant nothing, I did not know its name or any connotations associated with it.  This little dalliance with the Vesica Piscis did lead me to some interesting reading.  There does not seem to be a pattern, no.

I also seem to experience quite random synchronicities involving people, which would appear to have nothing at all to do with me.  For example, I may start seeing several references to a particular person (mostly unknown to me) over a short period of time and they will appear in quick succession through various mediums.  These synchronicities do then seem to pass with no effect on myself or my life (although I do wonder sometimes that I missing something!!).

I relate very much to your mentioning how you were incredulous at first about how it could be that you could anticipate events, or know things as you did.  Was this feeling limited to just the beginning of your awakening process (and by beginning I mean, say, the first months or year)?

The feeling has continued.  However, it is not now so constant or frenetic although i suppose it only felt that way before as it was something new and I was “testing” it constantly.  Sometimes I am not really sure whether my anticipation of certain events is an example of inner seeing or perhaps just a result of my powers of observation and logic improving.  I will generally get impressions about people or situations, which come to pass.  However, not in the instant way that I described earlier as was happening to me in the run up to full rising of kundalini.  What i feel will come to pass some time down the line. Also, for example, it regularly happens that I will say something or bring up a subject with someone, and they say they were thinking of whatever it was in that very moment!

Have you found your awakening changing over time, or how you see it or feel about it now that you are six years into the “experience”?

Yes.  In the beginning, because Kundalini seemed so rare, I did feel quite “alone”, as amazing as the experience was/is.  Over the years, as I have come across online resources I have come to realise that it is indeed happening to many people, even though I have yet to meet one in my “real life” (you are the first I have corresponded with).  I am now more at ease with the energy and with incorporating the experience into my everyday life.

I also used to be of the opinion that Kundalini should be left to its own devices, and for all these years, this has worked very well for me.  Recently, however, I am in contact with others who have got me thinking that I should include some kind of energy work in my life, to help get stagnant energy moving and more free flowing.  In the last couple of months I have started a weekly qi gong class (thanks for the tip!) and also made a bit of a foray into yoga.  I definitely believe that there are more blocks within us than we can imagine and anything we can do to help ourselves along the better!  I can feel a tangible effect so I will continue for some time.

I mentioned in the previous set of questions how before my awakening I did not follow any religion, although I had been raised until the age of 18 in church going households.  An unexpected development over the last few years since my awakening has been my deepening interest in Mystic Christianity.  I have always been a keen reader  and I remember my mum giving me my own copy of the bible on one of my birthdays.  I read it almost cover to cover when I was around 8 years old, when my mum was pregnant with my little sister and I was left to fill a lot of my time alone.  At the time, it felt like just a story book to me, a very interesting one at that!  I still have a copy of that bible.  I now definitely believe in Jesus and his life and teachings!!!  However, I hold back from speaking too much about this with my Dad and other older close relatives.  They would think me crazy! Some people are not for turning, and that’s OK.

I share a similar feeling about doing healing work.  In fact, this sense was with me even before awakening, a little voice saying for me to hold off, even though I already had been seeing energy and understood it a good deal.  With awakening, this sense increased considerably for me, but even then, that voice has urged me to hold off until I have completed more of the “work” of clearing.  Are you feeling the same sense for yourself?

Yes.  I am not sure if I will ever heal with my hands in this life.  However, I do feel as though certain people come into my life or are attracted to me for healing.  It may be through something they reveal to me, or something I say to them, or show to them, which makes a difference in their life, not necessarily a laying on of hands.  This is the kind of healing I currently allow myself to participate in.  I do my utmost to stay objective in these situations.   I don’t go into it looking to heal but as the relationship progresses I come to see the ways in which I have helped/may help further.  I think one of the factors that puts me off pursuing physical healing is that, deep down, I am of the opinion that healing should be self-initiated (I believe this is one of the goals of humans).  This is however at odds with also believing that my hands do have the power to heal!!! Hmmm…

Some writings in, I think, the Vedas describe how physical senses become more sharp.  I know that this was true, but some of my inner senses tied to the ear chakra (no one seems to mention this one) increased significantly as an inner sense.  Have you found your inner senses increasing for you (third eye, etc.)?

Interesting you mentioned ear chakra there (do you mean clairaudience or some more nuanced sense?).  Well, on the evening of kundalini rising, as mentioned in my earlier set of questions, I was relaxing on my bed going over certain events to do with my then boss whom I was having problems with.  I mentioned that I had a revelation.  Well the revelation commenced with my “hearing” the words: “But look at what you did with the information we gave you.”  Of course it was not an audible sentence, but I definitely heard it!   Also, much later during the experience that evening, once the main bits were over(!) I did hear music as I was trying to go to sleep.

I don’t think I am a seer.  I seem to have a lingering fear of seeing so I think this sense will not develop much further until I get over that.  However, saying that, I do tend to “see” situations as they really are although I cannot say whether this is a seeing thing or a feeling thing!  As an example, I am aware that several negative events in my workplace have been caused by a certain person.  No one else seems to see this.  Others see the image this person projects however I see that she brings her insecurities to the fore in the workplace and then acts accordingly, resulting in unpalatable situations.

I seem to be a feeler/knower.

As mentioned above, I also seem to have a knack for picking up what others are thinking (sometimes people who are physically close to me, and sometimes people who are emotionally close to me).  I should make it clear, it is not that I start with an intention of wanting to know what another is thinking; it is that something will come to my mind about a person (seemingly so random that it will seem as though it is my own thought), I will bring it up in conversation and the person will confirm that yes, they were just thinking of such a thing.

Have the releases you have had thus far helped you with how you reflect on or feel about past issues in your life?  

Greatly.  I was being affected by issues I wasn’t even aware that I had.  I was prevented from living life in the way I truly wanted to live it because of these issues and I blamed the issues for my unhappiness.  Now I have let them go (well most of them!).  I now see that all those issues led me to where I am now. I see that really they were not a big deal but that I had made some of them into a big deal.  I am grateful however to no longer have them!