Archives for posts with tag: awakening

Learning about this has been one of the most formidable lessons in my awakened life (and it got me into plenty of jams before I got the memo). ❤

One outcome of my awakening experience was my personal discovery of books from early Christianity that had been largely unknown until a large cache were discovered in the desert of Egypt in 1945. One book purported to be the secret teachings of Jesus to his innermost circle. What I realized, or thought I did, was that these books were describing awakening with a pretty high degree of specificity. It wasn’t only that, but how they appeared to veil the teachings in many cases by using descriptions that made it difficult for anyone not having the experience to even know what the writers were refering to. It was to my mind like a way of coding the teachings just enough that it made it hard to understand. This may have been intentional, but it could also have been the result of not having a specific enough vocabulary with which to do the describing.

This might sound strange, but let me give you an example for what I mean. Not long into awakening, me and a person who awoke along with me (a country apart, didn’t know each other, this all happened from a distance) we both referred to what was happening to us as “it.” That was how sophisticated our vocabulary was. We had no reference point, no context, nor a teaching to guide us. Overnight, innexplicably, we had a tellepathic connection (which was proven numerous times each week). “It” fit though, because how on earth would you describe “this” (we used that term also)? It also kept what was happening to us from prying eyes and ears since who would understand or believe it? There was no real context in which to put it in. When that’s the case, you create a language or vocabulary for it much like people who are dealing with it do today (witness the use of words like “downloads” and “portals” to refer to aspects of the experience). You create your own vocabulary to help describe what is happening to you.

How could it be, I wondered, that these books were described as heresy by certain people within the church when they so clearly revealed a sophisticated understanding of a very rare state of being?

When I first found these books and realized they were pretty clearly describing my state, I considered that it was a conspiracy that they were not just shoved aside, but that in many cases, the books that were part of an unnacceptable take on Christian thought were destroyed. Now however, I am realizing it was little more than a conspiracy of ignorance…and an easy trap to fall for by anyone who was not in the know, who hadn’t had the experience, or wasn’t initiated into the system.

Was it as many scholars have asserted, that these books were jibberish, mere speculation, and could not be tied to Jesus at all? Was it true that as some Orthodox apologists have said, that these people, called “Gnostics” were late-comers? Were they forging documents, slapping Jesus’s name on them in order to give their own “wild speculations and fantasies” more caché?

I have learned that the opposition will say just about anything in order to put a good man or woman down. Maybe this speculation was right, and my initial gut sense was all wrong. There were times when this certainly appeared to be the case.

This question put me on a 15 year journey where I made myself familiar with early Christianity. I didn’t spend years in seminary getting my doctorate in divinity, nor did I learn Greek or Hebrew. I knew next to nothing about the field and I just couldn’t square my sense that these early Christians were on to something of immense importance versus what those in what would become known as the Orthodox church had to say about these teachings. Something didn’t add up.

I have realized that while I lack the background in the history of early Christianity that many scholars in the field have, I have something most (perhaps nearly all) do not: I have the experience of awakening with all of its dizzying effects, signs, and symptoms. I have read at length even scholars who specialize in the Gnostic texts speculating about the meanings of the gospel of Thomas or Philip. My sense from the beginning was that these Gnostics were the real deal, and that these works constitutes a “lost Christianity” as Bart Ehrman has described it. Having said this, I will also say that they go far afield from the words of Jesus as we have come to know them. The difference between an esoteric system and an exoteric one (the Gnostics as we refer to them ate esoteric) is that esoteric systems have much greater production of documents because the followers keep having experiences and writing about them. In the case of these early Christians, they believed that the Christ was revealed to be within a person (some Gnostics considered Paul to be a bit of a hero because he writes in his letters that God revealed to him the Christ which was within him when he was struck by a blinding light on his way to Damascus). For the Gnostics, then, the crucifixion lost much of its importance because they found salvation from the awakening to the indwelling Christ.

I ask you: what teaching by Jesus ever made anything appear to be outside of ones self? The kingdom was all within one, and seeking was done inwardly. Those who “seek him” were seeking a quality that was already there. It is worth noting that this is precisely what most Eastern traditions that describe awakening say. It is also a completely different story that Orthodox Christians have put forward since about 100-130 A.D.

I will say, however, that there were times in my work on this subject where it looked like the Gnostics were a later “invention” or movement and could not be definitively pinned to Jesus. I was, for a time, considering that for as insightful as they were, there just wasn’t a connection to Jesus’s life. I got used to the idea that these were amazing people who spun their own insights into what the Christ was all about. Maybe they were a seperate development that still managed to “get there” even though they came later.

That was before I found out about the work of Walter Bauer who did a study or survey of documents from earliest Christianity, who, in the 1930’s (and before the discovery in 1945 of this cache of early books in Egypt) determined that heresy came first and Orthodoxy came later. Orthodoxy, based on Bauer’s work, placed Orthodoxy a hundred years after the heretics (give or take a decade or two). Source: Orthodoxy & Heresy In Earliest Christianity

Heresy has always been described by the church as that branch off of the “main vine” that represents a divergence from the central truths of the dogma (see church father Origen since he originated this concept). This begged the question: how could this be so in light of what Bauer found? This may have been the result of the church, a group within it, seeking to hide the truth about how things were in the early days of the movement. It could have been as simple as ignorance by another group who didn’t have the deeper teachings (and thus could easily not understand them even when they saw them).

Then there is the troubling reality that Bart Ehrman points out in his book Jesus Interupted which is that most of the discoveries we have made in the last 100 years of Christian documents are nearly all Gnostic (which is used to describe this group of Christians today—gnosticism meaning ‘one who knows’ or who has inner knowledge not attained through books or instruction alone). Ehrman asks pointedly, did the Orthodoxy not have anything to say that there have been so few new discoveries of Orthodox books or letters during the same time period? It is plausible, then, that Gnosticism was far more robust, engaged, and involved in the matters of Christian thought than the early heresy hunters would have us believe. The historical record is certainly showing us this in spades in this regard. In Bauer’s work he points out letters that show that the church gave up trying to convert Asia Minor because the heretics were so numerous and resistant to their message. It would be easy to just say they were deluded and utterly lost, but it hides the fact that this was a situation that had always been described as no big deal by those in the Orthodox wing of the church, something more like a few flies that needed to be swatted away as the Orthodoxy has tried to represent it as. No, “heresy” was much more developed than Orthodoxy was, and at a very early period. It begs the question as to which tradition was the original or earliest one.

When I think about what happens to our leaders today it is easy to see how each side in a political campaign seeks to demonize and dethrone the leader who is in the opposition. Those with the loudest voices wind up being heard and believed. We are well aware of the sentiment that the winners of a war get to tell the history as they want it told.

Orthodoxy won the war of ideas not because their thinking was superior but because they were more worldly and systematic in their willingness to take down what they considered an opponent. You can easily see just how harsh the rhetoric was by reading the writings of these noted antiheretics like Tertulian, St. Justin, and others like them. In fact, we know a lot about early Christian “heretics” because the diatribes about them were so long-winded (and detailed) by those who were opposing them. Christians don’t like the idea that there may have been a larger story here because they have lived with a version of a story they have come to know and love. But to say that a belief system is right simply because we have lived with it for 1600 years or more is not evidence that it is necessarily right or the final word. It only means that one group stamped out another group such that their knowledge base was silenced.

Yes it seems strange and foreign, and yet this is just what archeology has revealed and the voice that was silenced was showing us the very keys to the kingdom. These keys as I call them are a suit of methods that appear in the so-called Gnostic writings mostly found in the Nag Hammadi Libray but that are also found in documents discovered earlier like the Pistis Sophia. These documents describe the same phenomenon as those in Eastern schools of though which describe the process of enlightenment.

I am not suggesting that these people went to India, but managed it on their own and that the “ressurrection” of the soul was achieved by attaining a quality that one culture called Christ while another called it Buddha. As such, this knowledge wasn’t predicated on belief alone, but pointed to a universal quality that every person has regardless of race or creed.

Rumi, the great poet and mystic once wrote about how we all squabble over the names of things and that we try to differentiate the light falling in one place as fundamentally different from the light falling in another when it is all the same source, the same thing. I think Orthodoxy tried to do this in an effort to carve out its own seemingly unique niche when in fact it had discarded important elements along the way that would have enriched it tremendously.

The Mar Saba Discovery

Then along comes Morton Smith in the 20th century. Morton Smith claimed to have made a discovery of a book in Mar Saba near Israel in the early 1960’s that contained writing by Clement, a figure from early Christianity. Clement quotes lines from a book that he calls “Secret Mark” which was, as he described it, part of a private teaching Jesus gave to his closest followers. Clement emphasizes that these teachings were never spoken before the uninitiated, a situation Jesus cautions about even in the synoptic gospels when he refers to swine and pearls, those who were “without.” In this case, Jesus was pointedly obfuscating his teaching so the Gentiles could not understand lest they be saved. The book was intended for the “perfecting” of those who were followers of this Jesus.

Morton Smith took photographs of the document and when he returned later to examine the book again, it had vanished. It has not been seen since. Here’s the thing: forensic examination of the photographs themselves have established that the book is an authentic document of the era. Christian apologists go so far as to criticize the writing as being “too Clementine” which to me may well be enough to prove the point. The writing style is consistent with what historians know about Clement, who has many writings attributed to him. Those within scholarly circles who are Christian apologists set upon Smith in attack after attack, however.

The letter was about one thousand words and had been copied onto the endpages of a seventeenth century book which no one had ever mentioned before. The find shook the scholarly world, although it’s existance made hardly a ripple in popular Christian circles because the letter denounced the group involved as heretical. That seems to be enough for any reasonable believer of the faith, but it raised important questions for many who find the discoveries of this kind to be suggestive of what Bauer had found to be the case and which continuing discoveries like the Nag Hammadi Library texts had done two decades prior, which was whether we have been told the whole story. Here is an excerpt from an article in The Nation about the discovery:

These heretics, as Clement and Theodore saw them, claimed that they possessed a secret version of the Gospel of Mark. Jesus, they believed, had taught his followers that they were freed from the law and could do whatever they wanted without sinning. According to one of their Christian critics, Irenaeus, they actually thought they earned salvation by “doing all those things which we dare not either speak or hear of, nay, which we must not even conceive in our thoughts.”

The Nation, Gospel Secrets: The Biblical Controversies of Morton Smith, January 8, 2009, Anthony Grafton.

It is worth noting that as a result of scholarly research we now know that it was Mark’s gospel that was the earliest of all the gospels. While Clement denounced the teachings in Secret Mark, he did not say that this Mark didn’t exist. Here we have a proof that books like Secret Mark were later destroyed by the Orthodox church, with copies that have yet to surface. Consider what would happen if the prevailing attitudes and beliefs of today were against you, what would you do? Would you perhaps hide away the books that you do have in order to preserve them? If your books were unapproved of, they would be destroyed with fire.

While some scholars like Ehrman have suggested that the Nag Hammadi find may well have been an effort on the part of local Christians to free up space in their libraries by burying the collection several kilometers away, I am reminded of an email from Elaine Pagels recently that the burial of the NHL documents is well within the same time frame as the letter by Bishop Athanasius, written in 365 A.D. which spelled out what books were to be acceptable for use in the church. Every book Athanasius mentioned in his list is contained in the New Testament today. It was Athanasius’s letter that would set the die for all that would follow. Anything else would come under scrutiny and risk being remanded to the flames. Remember, before the printing press, books were copied by hand in what could take many months to complete. Burning one book or two could end an important thread within the early movement. Back then, in the first century, stories abounded about the life of Jesus, an oral tradition, that was only later written down after Jesus’s death.

This article is helpful to gain the full scope of the issue about how the New Testament was formed.

My thesis has been and continues to be that Jesus was a man who attained awakening. The books attributed to his private teaching happen to also describe what is known in India as kundalini. While there isn’t compelling evidence that Jesus had gone to India, there is no good reason to suggest that in order to awaken he would need to study under an enlightened guru either. It’s possible he got instruction locally from John the Baptist, or the Essenes. We just don’t know because for as a man as famous as Jesus is, there is a huge gaping hole that is unaccounted for in his life in terms of time. I never studied under a guru and managed to trigger the first initiatory steps into awakening on my own. Likewise, it is quite possible that Jesus did the same. All he would need would be a quality of intense curiosity and a drive to seek. I suspect that this is just what Jesus meant when he said seek and ye shall find. He sought, and he found. But what did he find? He described it as a world that was within each person. At no point does Jesus ever say that his kingdom was outside of himself. All of this was an inside job. So meditation would have been part of it, something Jews of the time were well familiar with. The right kind of meditation would do it, nothing fancy, but something that would serve to achieve a first release of inner emotional material followed by inner inquiry.

It turns out that I did precisely what the heretical Jesus prescribed, which was to remove what keeps one divided within the self. This is actually a prescription Jesus mentions in the gospel of Thomas and mentions in the gospel of Phillip. The way I achieved this was through a conversation with a holy man when I felt a long-standing frustration guilt, and frustration with the universe, afterwhich everything began to change. I unburdened myself of a giant knot that had me tied up for decades, it was almost like an insurmountable impasse for me at the time.

I suspect that the story of Jesus’s baptism was like this or served a similar purpose for him because in the Gnostic texts he is teaching about how to attain the kingdom by resolving what divides you within, and a teacher always relays to his or her students how they achieved it themselves. The elephant in the room is if Jesus was God why was he going to John to have his sin removed? Why did Jesus need baptism? He obviously felt like he needed it, and instead of seeking the God, according to Orthodox scripture, which had always been within him. It’s a huge leap around the question that Christians never seem to ask. I think that it is a perfectly reasonable question to ask and actually makes loads of sense once the private teachings are known and taken into consideration.

With John, who claimed he could relieve the burden of sin through ritual washing, or baptism, Jesus was relieved enough of his own burden for the first flashes of “the light” to begin showing through. Jesus also spent forty days fasting and praying in the wilderness near where John was located. I will point out that this is the same approximate time that the Taoists prescribe for awakening the secret of the golden flower, their take on the awakening process. Similarly, in Hindu practice the number of 40 to 45 days comes up a lot for a time frame. It takes some effort to break through the veil of the earthly self to attain to the “heavenly” one (regardless of what tradition you ascribe to). Orthodoxy glosses over this precisely because it knows nothing about these practices. Then, when presented with the very means to do so, they cried foul heresy. The kingdom thus was found and then lost within a few short generations. The apostolic era came to an end not because of some God-ordained event with dubious reasoning but precisely because people no longer had access to the teachings that would have kept the era chugging along nicely. All of the signs of the holy ghost, and of awakening, were gone because the knowledge had exited the building.

If Jesus had awakened, the libertine attitude shown in the works of some of the Christian mystics like the Carpocrations that Clementine was speaking out against in his letter mentioned earlier has a very good chance of being true. Awakening pushes you beyond the normally accepted mores of the time by virtue of the fact that the energy of awakening vivifies and stimulates the body in new and novel ways. The Hindu describe it as a libidinous force, a creative current that leads one to new levels of bliss that are experienced and described as orgasmic. It’s not that it is literally so, but that this is the only way to aptly describe it so it can be halfway understood. Awakening absolutely impacts the master glands of the body resulting in high outputs of all sorts of hormones. Kundalini a sexual energy? I have always felt that the energy of awakening stimulates all sorts of things, including libido. Kundalini does much more than just stimulating libido.

Many people who are awakened know about the futility of skirting issues. No, the energy seems to push us to leap headlong into the cleansing fire that is the holy ghost, the feminine aspect, what in India would be called Shakti or the Ida current. All of this is consistent with awakening, and there is no reason to think it wasn’t the case with Jesus.

The problem with the Orthodoxy was that none of the secret teachings made any sense to them. How was it possible that by finding the savior within, the Christ, one washed away ones shame of human sexuality? Or guilt, or any other issue that represents stored emotional material that awakening can help the person to clear? Awakening can do this, though. It cleanses and returns you to a renewed mind and state of being. It is a salvific force.

It is now more likely that Jesus did have a private teaching and that the synoptic gospels represent only a thin slice of a larger picture. While Clement railed against this “Secret Mark” as heretical, I ask the question: says who? On whose authority? Why should I pay any attention to someone who was never included in the private teachings of a realized master? Even when Jesus says “No one comes to the father except by me” Christians don’t consider how that statement could mean something significantly different than what they assume it does. In Jesus’s day he was the only person around who had attained to the level that he had, so yes, Jesus was the only game in town. Like any great teacher, if you wanted to get there quickly, you studied under him like any teacher anywhere who had a grip on the esoteric or hidden things.

It took a bit of courage to photograph and then publish the marks that showed up when kundalini rose a decade and a half ago. It was an odd thing to witness these marks, one on my right hip and another that emerged after a clearing of karmic material tied to my heart center several years later. The posts about this are in the archive. I include one from the heart below.

At first when I wrote about it, there was little comment about them, but after about a year comments began to come in with people describing similar marks who had been running searches for burn-like marks after spiritual events, and voila—they found me. Many tended to be either on the hips or near the shoulders. Then, a few years ago, a Japanese graduate student shared photos with me of his own marks which were nearly identical to my own, also on his hip and another like my heart center mark except at his throat chakra which following a kundalini awakening.

I thought that someone or something had done this to me, but as increasing numbers of people have come forward to describe their own burn-like marks, it seems to me that these marks may simply be what happens when strong energy is being released (because of its proximity to the energetic event tied to kundalini awakening). Intuitively it seems right that the marks could happen when energy is trying to move up the legs to the torso, and vica versa, and like an energy bolt used to traveling in a more or less straight line, it has to make a sudden turn and becomes impeded and marks result (this is my theory at this point). This could result in a burn or iritation to the skin. For me, I know that this is nothing mystical or “woo-woo” but serves as a physical trace of the energy in the physical. I also have not just marks that emerged around the time I awakened, but I have a persistent mark over my heart and recently that mark has moved.

It would be helpful if science were to take an interest in this observable phenomenon. Absent that, I am left to investigate and collect accounts by others with similar effects that have happened to them.

Three days ago, I noticed that the mark over my heart center has moved. It started at the lower sternum as you see in the photo. It has moved up by about 2 and a half inches, and the mark, which has tended to be circular, and which has been constant in its presence for years now has grown three times in size. It is less noticable but can be easily seen in the right light. It hasn’t waned in that time and resembles two semicircles that sit opposite each other along the vertical axis of my torso. The end of each semicircle doesn’t touch the semicircle beneath it, but the effect is seeing a near-perfect circle being formed (or at least suggested). I am observing it to see what it does after this move, if anything.

I often find it hard to describe what I feel because while I know that it became a novel but continuous state compared to how I felt previous to this experience of awakening, its constancy has led me to find it to be a new normal. How do you normalize supreme bliss? I spent years learning how to appear normal while speeding through another world within. It’s progress now that I can keep from needing to sit or lie down for an hour or two because the bliss is so strong. There were periods where I would be so blissed out that I would forget from one moment to the next what I was thinking about or even doing. It didn’t even matter in many cases. I can’t say that I handled it all that well in the beginning, but over time I learned how to carry that bliss while being able to focus on the kinds of things that would normally get wiped away by the thick blanket of bliss.

The effect of the bliss is that it has had a significant effect on dulling or eliminating a lot of pain in my body, and softening emotional pain. While this is helpful, even miraculous, I am concerned that it could make identifying a physical problem difficult in the future. Pain is an important feedback when things go wrong that need attention. I sometimes worry a little about this. Could I miss important signs of my imminent demise? The bliss says, “pipe down, it’s okay, just chill…” What’s behind the bliss? A cocktail of chemistry, I have found. It isn’t all just dopamine, but a good portion is based on my experience and investigation into it.

I disagree with Jana Dixon in her assertion in the Physiology of Kundalini that dopamine does not play an important role in the symptoms of kundalini. I have observed that high dopamine levels are responsible for being able to take part in the release process because while dopamine is a natural pain killer, the effect it had on me psychologically was that it made it possible for me to let go, and to stop “grasping” for the old familiar psychological patterns that were the basis of old beliefs and programming. What I experienced fell neatly into the realm of high dopamine levels. Additionally, I have found that in people with schizophrenia, the condition involves an inability to properly metabolize dopamine, resulting in a build-up in the brain resulting in the psychotic break if nothing changes. I found an online conversation of a group of schizophrenics who had gone off their medication just to see how long they could go without serious problems. One person said that he discovered his symptoms after a week were identical to kundalini. For me, this was proof that at the right level, dopamine is directly tied to elements that makes kundalini feel the way that it does. It may also be responsible for boosting psi ability in the brain by allowing the self to tune out the usual signals through the sensory cortex in favor of tuning in the nonphysical senses. Dopamine, it could be said, gives peoole a pleasant rush at one level, but could do much more at higher levels.

When I read accounts of people who smoked opium (a dopamine analog in plant form) many of the accounts described symptoms very similar to my own experience with dopamine. When the self lets go and surrenders, the chemistry instantly shifts away from the stress hormones of norepinephrine and adrenaline and into the softer more dreamy dopamine/oxytocin range of the spectrum. And who among us haven’t felt intense feelings of love during awakening? I am not suggesting that dopamine production is kundalini, I am suggesting that dopamine is the concoction that creates part of the experience of bliss in the body. This is all being coordinated at the nonlocal consciousness level. Dopamine doesn’t get produced or released until the signal from the consciousness comes. I will also add that I am aware that other compounds are in this mix, it’s just that the effects of dopamine were so easy to identify with some simple online searching. I do think that without a little adrenaline, dopamine tends to make me want to lie down for considerable lengths of time. It slows motor response, it has even slurred my speech and gave me the stereotypical “Buddha gaze” where eyelids are often at half mast. I wouldn’t rule out the presence in small amounts of DMT since in small amounts it has been shown to create bliss. I for one would like very much to test this in a clinical setting to see how DMT bliss compares to my own physically produced bliss compounds.

When this shift in the heart happened, what I count as the fifth in a five-layered process (tied to the koshas—each chakra is like an onion, kosha meaning “husk” and each layer aligns with the five major aspects of the energy body: emotional mental, physical, energetic, and spiritual). This means that each chakra can be cleared by kundalini up to five times as it acts on each aspect of the chakra and its koshas.

At this time, just a week before the change in location, I inquired in meditation to find out the nature of a hitch that I had for most of my life, which is a habitual tendency to move into poverty consciousness. This never made much sense to me in the past because I always had a capacity to get whatever I needed in life, so what gives? Just ask and it will be given.

I realized in the course of the inner inquiry that there were no limits that existed within, and what was causing it was a vestige remaining that came from growing up in a family where this issue seemed front and center. I was myself taken on a very fast journey through a space that I knew was my being and what felt curiously similar to a spaciousness that I experienced in the wake of the third clearing of my heart center in 2008.

In my recent meditation, my inner guidance took me through this vast open space and there was simply nothing there that would impede it (it was completely clear—a vast brilliant white space–my own connection to and experience of the divine white light capable of being anchored here by me in this life). Huh.

This was new to me because over the years this inner space was always cluttered with something. I grew accustomed to feeling the “remainder” of the stuck energy that had yet to be resolved, with the process always being where I saw, noted its presence (after a while of getting used to this process), knew it was there, but relied on the energy to get to it in its own time. I, as a result, never second-guessed the energy in terms of which block it would get to next because it was much better at getting it done than I could ever do on my own. That said, I did practice Qi Gung and meditation in order to ‘soften the ground’ so to speak in a hope of making things go more smoothly for this intelligent energy. It was my “project” and after years of doing this work sudden it became a wind-swept silence of a space.

“There is nothing there” my inner guidance said to me. There was nothing in my way, whatever that hitch was that I had was now gone. Looking back I realize that most of it was the result of other people who either expressed a poverty consciousness, or it was people near me who tried to connect me with it. Luckily those people have edited themselves from my life now and for the last three years I have been actively engaged in bringing my studio business back to life (with the greatest growth happening during the pandemic).

Within days events changed. I had cobbled together work from last month’s production in the studio, held an event, and in 20 years of doing shows and events, this one wasn’t just better than anything I had done before, it was head and shoulders beyond anything that I had ever done since I began the business in 1997. I thought it was a fluke until the next week’s event was just as crazy as the first. This was repeated a third time for good measure and the result was the same. The whole tenor of the business has changed. I am hiring part time help and the truth is, it wont be enough. A new chapter has opened up. The heart mark had shifted during this time, signaling a readiness to step into the next phase of the journey.

The curious thing about this is that I keep hearing that abundance is tied to the root or base energy center. I feel that for me, it all happens in my heart as a pivot point, a mediator, between root and crown centers. For whatever reason, this was the most natural outcome for me. How is that possible? Is it that when we do something with love, it can only really emerge best from the heart? Would it then be an outcome mediated by it?

All of this is the culmination of years worth of work, so while this recent development was a pleasant surprise, it was one step along a long line of steps. And why am I even saying this? It’s to show that there are different ways of doing this work, to convey that the moment someone says that something must happen a certain way, you can know there are many paths that lead to the same summit. The other side is my sense that none of this is supernatural but is, I think, natural. It’s physioligical and driven by an energetic force we unfortunately don’t know much about in a scientific way because so few researchers are willing to delve into it. We do have reams and reams of accounts both current and ancient by the people experiencing the phenomenon. It is described as a serpent in India. Based on how the energy rose up through my body, I can understand why. But there is no snake, there isn’t even a Shiva and Shakti meeting at the crown. Those are apt descriptions to say what it is like, no one thinks it actually is that. This is much the same as Jesus saying the kingdom is like a candle, or a treasure in a field. The kingdom isn’t literally those things, it is like those things. Based on my observations it is more likely that this energetic even is the result of the two brains, the left and right hemispheres finally synchronizing in a very particular way which leads to a sudden rush of energy and bliss flowing into the crown and radiating throughout the body. That may not sound terribly exciting, but how the mechanics sound and how it feels can appear quite different. Prana is just electricity?? It might be that a slight “over-volt” in the body is enough to supercharge the brain and kick the endochrine system into high gear where a host of hormones kick into high gear resulting in better health, sharper physical senses, and an expansion of cognition even into intuitive abilities. Clearly these burns or marks are the result of a real physical force, and the best explanation is an arc of electricity perhaps coupled with resistance at critical points where energy flows from and to the torso to the legs. It would help if someone with a technical background were to take an interest. How to rouse those in slumber?

Personally I suspect that the phenomenon represents an area of inquiry scientifically that would likely serve to challenge materialist views long held about consciousness as arising from matter rather than the other way around (which is what I think this is). It also has the potential to vault us into a new understanding of ourselves, and our potentials If only we can break the log-jam of enlightenment-era thinking (namely Descart who championed the idea that we are just biological machines entirely driven by the matter assembled that we call biological life). The incidence of marks that show around energetic events like awakening is one such example of real physical traces that help to anchor the phenomenon in something more than “woo-woo” and gets us all closer to “how-to” through an investigation of this field as a once-rare event that is fast becoming a more common phenomenon.

I know that it is entirely possible that my heart mark could help show the physical traces and existance of the chakra, not as a belief or notion promulgated by Eastern philosophy and esotericists, but as a reality that could serve to point to the system most directly tied to the forces of consciousness.

Additionally it could help us to understand the size of the chakra in the energy body. The fact that the mark on my heart emerged immediately after a heart clearing event, was the size of a dime at that time (in 2011), only to change size while also moving up my sternum by about three inches may have a lot to tell us about how this system behaves. While we may not have dozens of people for a half-decent study, we may be able to glean information from the few who do exhibit these markings as a response or reaction to the energy. Is this mark, which persists, the result of a strong energetic pathway that opened up in the wake of awakening and the release of emotional baggage? It feels electric to me, so that would be one clue for future investigation. I also sense that what might be increased electrical activity in my body may well be felt or read as bliss in consciousness. I see a connection with this energy serving to stimulate my endochrine system which has led to a host of positive physical results. It also, not surprises, has pushed libido a good deal, and with so many experiencers describing kundalini as a sexual energy, this effect may help us to understand why, while helping us to see how this energy impacts the body in a positive way (while understanding better how to support the physical organism so it has less chance of burning us out or experiencing negative side effects from the energy).

Currently most materialistically inclined thinkers think that the idea of the chakra is just speculative hogwash. I think that by upping our game on this front we could begin to show anecdotal evidence that this is more than mere speculation.

The problem I face is finding the people who are affected in the same or similar ways as I have in regards to the marks. While I have a handful of people who have reported having had simkar marks only one has been willing to share pictures which he took before the marks faded after the surge of energy that likely produced them faded. While I had a hip mark, my Japanese friend developed a mark at his throat chakra which is not that different in size and shape as my heart chakra mark. At this point, these kinds of numbers are not enough to convince any researcher that there is anything to it.

If you have experienced this type of phenomenon, I would like very much to know because it will help us to better understand this phenomenon and without data, there isn’t any interest. If you have images you can send them to info@staffordartglass.com. Your info will be held in confidence for any contacts that you make.

~Parker

All throughout this blog much of what I have written in regards to my personal experience related to the phenomenon of awakening has been to suggest directions in which we can all go, or consider as areas of inquiry about the unfolding nature and emergent nature of our consciousness particularly as it relates to “enlightenment” (for as much as I dislike the term) or awakening (which is much better I think since it more accurately suggests what is happening in the process). This is something that you have yourself. You only need enough interest and passion, to investigate it seriously enough to begin developing your own natural abilities.

Many masters who teach about the nature of enlightenment warn against filling the mind of the student with too many ideas about what to expect concerning any number of different facets of the journey to enlightenment. What often happens is, by not knowing, the student or neophyte builds up in their mind what they think the experience might look and feel like. By doing this, the mind creates an imagined image of something that in all likelihood is innacurate. The problem with this is that it represents a journey away from what is most essential. These things are so simple even a child knows how to relate to them. Be ye like children!

The other side of the coin is that as sentient beings, we have the operations for enlightenment already within us. The Buddha sleeps in all, and when it awakens, it reveals what is most essential or true when the personality can listen to it with the innocence and open curiosity of a child (with no assumptions taken on). If one does what was prescribed for reaching the awakened state, there is nothing else to teach because the innermost knowing, the cosmic consciousness of the Hindu the Tibetans, Taoists, or the gnosis of the early Christians, is revealed or made manifest. Even as I say this, though, there can be the expectation that awakening is an arrival, suggesting to some that upon awakening I will know all that needs to be known when in fact this knowing operates more like an onion that we peel back layer by layer to the degree that the personality (and ego) are ready to examine and be open to this new knowledge. It is possible for the personality to be resistant to an important truth in the process, and as a result, the information or awareness of that information can be kept out from personal awareness and ones experience.

In reality the ordinary person is laboring, unknowingly, under the operatiom of countless inner programs which directs her attention which we call beliefs. It is hard to know or to realize the degree to which these beliefs govern perception or awareness. All who labor under them do not know that they do so, and are completely unaware that belief is governing them.

When I say belief, I mean any number of ideas which a personality can hold. It can be beliefs about how the person thinks the world works, which can include beliefs from the culture (often reflected in words like “values”), politics, and religion or spirituality. The hardest beliefs to identify are the ones that don’t seem to be beliefs at all. There is a very neat trick we play on ourselves sometimes when we tell ourselves that we don’t believe in something. “I don’t believe in this Judeo Christian concept of God” and the self then thinks it is being naturally innoculated against belief. In truth, this is itself a belief, one in which the world is devoid of a superconscious whose existence gave direction or form to the worlds we know today. What results is an end to any meaningful investigation along these lines of an inner direct manner.

What this belief does is it builds up an artificial wall within experience and perception that then says (without pronouncing it loudly), “I will disregard anything pertaining to the existence of a divine presence!” The self perhaps believes this because the stories written about God strike them as preposterous or unlikely, maybe more reflective of our ideas of what a God might be like (which of course many stories about God do contain). What is lost is the path to what a god might actually look like or be beyond the world of built-up ideas, legends, myths and tales (i.e., beliefs).

We all have the ability to know just about anything about the universe. I know that may sound impossible to some, but one thing I learned early on in my awakening process is that beyond the island of our carefully managed beliefs is an ocean of knowledge just waiting to be tapped into.

It’s interesting how a belief, which we tend to feel is so completely true can in fact misdirect us so much. The reason why it does this is how belief requires the mind to stop probing and sensing inwardly. This probing is called the intuition, and part of it involves the nonlocal or universal mind. Some call this the higher self. In truth all designations have truth and each are connected to the other so that yes, it is universal mind AND it is the higher self AND it is the accumulated wisdom of the self that you are right here, right now.

Belief involves a suspension of critical examination, part of the logic process, that shuts down any effort at questioning the belief. Belief has at its core a circular motion whose only purpose is to perpetuate itself. This is how silly ideas have been perpetuated for thousands of years largely unchecked.

As humans, we are so used to using the rational mind as if it is the end-all and be-all of intellectual determination, when in fact logic only plays a very limited role in this process. The part of the mind and brain that handles logic has no intuitive capacity. Logic is a tool that was designed to be used by the intuitive self for testing its knowledge. It isn’t the knowledge itself, but is a process by which things can be known experientially. Logic, then, would be the discipline that would allow you to properly investigate the evidence of God existing in all of matter, for instance. How that is done is an investigative process when the intuition either does not know or knows so well that it gives up its knowledge so clearly that the logic-driven experiment is simply known without needing trial and error to reveal the correct steps in the experiment. Both instances are possible but it seems that unless a person is clear or knowledgable of the steps required that some trial and error is required. Einstein knew in an intuitive flash the ideas behind Relativity but spent years working out the math to explain it, for instance.

It sounds impossible that the mind could know what the self has no experience with, but this is precisely what intuition can do. You might be like Einstein and see the core of the math as phenomenon without knowing the math at all. It is instead experienced directly as a felt experience. Feeling is operative in having intuition work well. It is the opposite of logic.

The most important part in learning to cultivate intuition is being alright with having no formulated ideas about how a given inquiry will go. Will we find God lurking in the subatomic particles? Who knows, it’s a mystery. Let’s keep our mind completely open.

The mindset most necessary to nurturing intuition in my experience is this attitude. It assumes nothing at all. In fact, the more you can learn to let the mind be a blank screen, the more likely you are to catch glimpses of what is actually out there. In this case, the radio is not talking to itself but is in contact with the multiverse. I am trying to show you how to be a gifted channel for the universe. Intuitive is receptive and has often been seen as feminine while logic is more masculine. These are qualities every person has, so everyone has an equal opportunity to be able to develop it if that is their interest.

The more you can completely suspend belief, the better you will be at receiving, like a radio, the information that exists “out there.” While this has been central to the investigative and psychic method known as remote viewing, it is also how many of the most gifted psychics operate: completely blind. Doing this, while disconcerting for some at first, is the only real way to go when doing this work. It requires a suspension of ego, and self as the judge of experience. There is a lot of very neurotic habits tied up in needing to know to the point where one becomes rigidly fixed in ego and the personality and all of its previous experience, now controlled and filtered by its conglomerate of beliefs, traumas, and habits, so that the deeper truth may have no hope of ever emerging. There is simply too much competing material.

This also suggests that releasing stored emotion is another strand in the path to becoming more intuitive. Experience has shown that the best intuitives are those who have been at this work for lifetimes and is often an outgrowth or consequence of a deep abiding desire to know the truth and not a version of it. This is most often driven by a great love within and a devotion for truth. It often means stripping the self bare, often of cherished notions, just to know what is real or true. This forms itself into a multi-lifetime journey that takes time to develop and mature into. It may be that you have done this work before and are reading this now because you need to be reminded. If you have no experience with this, this might be the catalyst that starts the process. It isn’t like you will have to wait lifetimes because its capacity is already in everyone. You need only to know how to bring it out. Experts may have been at it before, but this is a capacity all humans have.

To cultivate this in your life requires practice. Most assume that the logical part of the mind is superior, and so always grasp for that reflexively. Can you differentiate between logic and intuition? Do you know it when you feel it?

In truth, logic is inferior to the part of mind that can know the cosmic, which is a completely different part of the brain from the logical linear left hemisphere. It isn’t that the brain creates or generates these experiences, but more that they both receive, like a biological radio, signals from the nonlocal consciousness that exists outside of time and space and is thus transcendent by its very nature. The personality thus does not realize how naturally psychic that it is.

The most uncomfortable condition for many along this path is being okay with not knowing. The most important skill to my mind in this work is getting used to not knowing, or being a blank slate. When you can do this, you do not engage the part of you that grasps. This is always the logical side of self. It thinks that is the path to success. Only in its limited way is this true.

What I want to point you to is how to not grasp, instead, holding your hand (your mind) open. When you do this, all the sands of all the deserts flow through your hand. Try and grasp it, and you only get a bit of grit.

The intuitive right brain operates best when wide open so that it can be the expert channel that it is. It knows nothing and yet can know All. The skill in using it lies in knowing when it is being used then trusting that when the sand flows that it can see the one single grain that you wish to see. It’s intelligence is a mystery how it does what it does. When I use it to locate a friend, it shows me the scene where she is in this very moment. I note the time, I jot down the details, and I ask her what she was doing between 11:00 a.m. to noon EST. I never know what I will see or be led to. Sometimes intuition will work on its own. You pluck a book randomly off a library bookshelf, pop it open, and find the very page that answers your question from an hour before.

Putting my money where my mouth is, I did all my research for a chapter in a book using only the intuitive as the way. Instead of researching authors and finding dead-end after dead-ends after spending hours in the library, I instead would accidentally discover passages in books that contained the informatiin that I needed. People would mention sources without my hsving mentioned needing the source—this was all serendipity. This happened numerous times. I already knew the material but I needed additional sources more than just me saying it for the book. This worked beautifully. Intuition brought me to sources within moments instead of days or weeks of searching card catalogs or reading extracts, for example. This all seems impossible, but for the intuition, anything is possible (or nearly so). Anyone can do what I do. This is the entire point for me writing this to you.

The good thing about this is you can test yourself and work to hone your skill in this area. When you get a miss, it requires, for me, to go back and think carefully about what I was doing at the time. Chances are, I assumed something or thought something instead of abiding with the information. I inserted an assumption somewhere. It usually isn’t a mere miss, but because I inserted something from my mind into the flow of information.

There are many benefits to doing this work. It reveals how neurotic we can be in needing to know and to control our environments when the impulse to control is itself the antithesis of genuine knowledge very often. By clearing the mind you can enter into silent presence, which is a great way to feel the soul of the world or the presence behind all things. It leads to deepening relaxation and the untying of emotional knots within the self. It is an undoing that feels like a threat to the neurotic, to those who always needs to know what’s happening and how to manage it. It undoes the fundamental lack of trust in the world as a safe place to be. There is no need to rush—we have plenty of time (lifetimes in fact). It can lead you to your fundamental nature as a creative being, a creative energy felt as bliss.

You have to learn to trust yourself and to depend on yourself to do this work. Start simply, inquire, and practice. If you keep the findamental ideas in place, any practice (not built on belief) will likely work.

I had been telepathically connected to her, tied as it were, after an effort on her part to pull me into her field forcefully at the point of her awakening. This was all done nonlocally. Anyone who says “twin flames” cannot force you to do anything you don’t want to do hasn’t experienced what I did. It was the equivalent of having someone charge into your inner life unbidden, unasked, and insinuating themselves into your life.

You might want to believe that these connections are divine and predetermined, or the result of a process where there are no mistakes. I can confirm that the wild card is human will and when it is exercised unconsciously we want to call it “fate” or the “will of God.” I can say that it is possible for these connections to be forged without our consent and against our hopes dreams or desires. It’s one of the things that hardly anyone will tell you because most feel so caught up in the engine of bliss that it can blind them to a world of faults. I think that the bliss keeps one from critically examining the phenomenon. Perhaps that is part of the point, a cosnic stab at unraveling our own personal errors in the hope of returning everything back to love. “Shush….all of those things are details, all that matters now is love. Now comes the age of forgiveness” it seems to say in the light of experiences such as the one I encountered in early 2011.

I am one who tries to make lemonaide out of those lemons, so at one point after dozens of preturbations and freakouts and contractions on her part, I ceased trying to help outwardly. I just stopped. I then began speaking to her higher self. Clearly, for as upside down as this was, it must surely be an effort on the part of her self in time and her soul (unbound by it) to get the memo on her own, in a manner of speaking. Sometimes it is with the aid of angels whose unsung roles are at work in the bakground.

I got the idea of just speaking to her soul instead to the self after realizing that she was always locked in one drama or another. I sat quietly on my bed before sleep and focused my attention on her and I began to tell her how beneficial bliss is for healing, in the hopes that she might inquire further into the topic on her own. When I was stripping paint from trim outside my house a few days later, my mind would again speak to her, and it would be all about the power of bliss. I would do what I could to slip the idea in through back channels instead of telling her directly. If I told her directly, I knew she would resist it because of her egoic innability to accept what I offered to her as truth. Instead, I made it so it would seem it occurred to her herself. It turned out that it worked very well.

After a week of my daily meditations and inward sugestions to her about the benefits of bliss, she started asking me about bliss out of the blue. There was no better confirmation that something was working than this. Here was a topic we had never spoken about at all and now she was suddenly asking me about it. I kept quiet about my inner suggestions and began to tell her about the benefit of bliss. She asked me in a morning text exchange that first week, “So do you feel bliss?” I replied that I did feel bliss. She asked how often. I explained that it tended to be nearly constant. She responded as if she couldn’t believe that a person could do that. I assured her it was possible, and that I had reached that in my work. She wondered how that was even possible. It was here that I knew that a transfer was possible because I did truly feel bliss most of the time and that she was becoming open to the idea that this state was possible for a person. It had taken years for me to come to such a place (feeling bliss in this way).

Those with whom we share these connections can feel what we feel to greater and lesser degrees, depending on how the personality is set up. In her case there was a lot of resistance and fear which got in the way sometimes of an aligning between portions of the self that can benefit from this type of work. When I would think of her she would feel it but she interpreted it as my wanting to be involved with someone else. She once messaged me explaining how she could feel my desire for another woman, how I would kiss her, even. At the time I let her think what she wanted to think because it served to drive her away from me (I was stalked for years by this person), but the truth was, it was her that I was thinking about. This helped me to see how we can receive information very clearly, but we can step in a distort with our personalities the meaning of the information. There was an edge of concern that she might distort what I was sending her.

Being able to do the work completelly on the etheric or subtle level because of how much ego was present in this case was a good outcome and was probably the ONLY way she was going to learn how. It was better to let her think it was all her own idea…and the thing was, it was because she had to first accept the idea from me as if it was her own. You can’t make them accept an idea but you can use your telepathic connection to plant seeds. Just keep planting them and don’t need to be the one who gets the accolades. Most growth happens this way which is the result of seeds having been planted in this way.

When she began asking me about this bliss, it was then a very simple matter to transfer to her the awareness the bliss field or bliss body to her telepathically while also using our verbal communication as one medium of focus and exchange for an event that was largely taking place internally or etherically.

I said that it was very easy to feel bliss and all she needed to do was to follow the steps that I spelled out to her which involved breathing and focusing only on the breath. I told her how to breathe and the breaths to take. I was breathing in bliss and breathing out bliss, transmitting outward as she breathed inward. Understand, I was not THE source for the bliss. I know that what I feel as bliss is just the awareness of a field of bliss that exists. I am a miner of gold that already exists, you see. I could hold my hands out etherically to her and have her respond because of the nature of our entanglement or connection. I didn’t need to say this was happening, and it it’s best that you do not mention it. Feel it, then transmit it directly through feeling. You become a lighthouse. Understand, this is only for things that WILL directly benefit them (not you). Anything less is manipulation and generates negative karma for yourself.

In the moments during my breathing suggestion, she very suddenly began feeling bliss run all through her. I knew at that moment that the door had opened for her and as long as she didn’t respond with fear, this state would grow and establish itself. It was so easy to do, really. She just had to be open to it Bliss is not what you do, it is what you are, so this is easy if the right things are in place. I explained that she had gotten it and that she could go back to it anytime that she wanted, another neat trick of suggestion, which forms the very useful belief that this state can he accessible at any time or in any place. From all accounts, it has been precisely this for her. It worked because it was all based in what is true. Bear in mind, it could have gone a different way, in which case I would need to have dropped the idea after a while. There is something important about not wanting it or needing it too much, or obsessing over it too much.

Sometimes it is easier for the egoically inclined to think they are doing all of this themselves, especially someone like the person I had to deal with for a time. Tricky? Maybe a little, but it wasn’t an effort to manipulate her but to provide for her something thst she sorely needed in her world as what I refer to as her role of “professional victim.” Its hard to know how dissempowering such a state of mind is to us when it is you who are buried in it. In fact, there is no use in even trying to explain it. It is easier to plant seeds in the hope that they will take root (all of this is done nonlocally).

I tell you this because you might be dealing with someone you are connected to that has been hard to deal with. This method or approach could be of some benefit. In order to feel it best, you have to feel it natively in your own skin first and then imagine whatever that state of mind is, being offered, not pushed, on the other over and over. Do this at various times during the day. Don’t be obsessive about it, treat it as a casual thought without a hope of an outcome. You do though, offer up the suggestion of its benefits as you feel them yourself (because through you they will feel it).

I later found out that gurus in India teach their students in this way by holding certain states in mind, which students will tend to pick up on in meditation. I thought how perfect.

In the Indian tradition they said what a great responsibility it was for the guru. I myself thought how easy all of this was, how this method made growth and healing much easier when I stopped trying to help outwardly and began working inwardly. Perhaps it can be a subtle way to help the other grow and heal. It is like osmosis.

~Nemasté

Boy, this has taken a bit of courage to post especially given my stance on using substances for altering consciousness in the past. Gulp. I am writing, though, to share an observation and point something out that happened in the event that you are interested in taking a deeper look on your end. Or not.

July 1st 2021 was the day that the prohibition of marijuana ended in the state of Virginia. Not long after that, a friend stopped by the studio after having obtained weed. All legal, now, and what a strange place to be I suppose.

If you read my blog you will see that I advocate natural means for reaching alternate states of consciousness. While Terrance McKenna didn’t believe it was possible to enter into the numinous without DMT or psilocybin, I know different. While I very much respect what these early psychonauts were attempting to do, theirs was just one path or road to “Oz.” In a way I would have liked to have spent some time with Terrance explaining to him how I came across this naturally. I don’t think it would have changed his mind, though. For his generation he had found a viable way of gathering knowledge and experience that in many ways is perfectly valid because of how broad and far-reaching consciousness is. My way took longer so it was not a path meant for the impatient. People get bored quickly.

While under the influence of a drug we say that our consciousness has been altered. Has it really been “altered” unnaturally? We have receptors for all kinds of substances that are found in nature that allow us to experience what those agents do to us. We also have bodies that produce many of those compounds naturally also. You can see that I might appear like I am hemming and hawing. The truth is, I think that plant agents can be very helpful if used judiciously and not used so they become like a crutch. That said, what I hear from friends who have used marijuana for years illegally, is that it is far superior for cutting anxiety and helping with sleep than drugs that leave them feeling out of sorts and with other unintended symptoms (“may cause intestinal bleeding, rapid heart rate, shingles, fear of the unknown, sleeplessness, and dizziness”).

Recently a friend offered some of the devils lettuce to me and I decided that I would take a very small amount because I was curious to see what effect it would have on me now that I have awakened. I decided quite unexpectedly that I would give it a go after many decades of having sweared it off. I explained to my friend that one reason why I didn’t smoke the stuff was because it made me feel like I could feel this immensely large consciousness very close to me and I explained that I could not tell if that consciousness was me or if it was something else. It made me feel very….self conscious too! My friend looked at me and just smiled. I realized she had no idea what I was even talking about, and I kind of felt funny even mentioning it. That’s one reason why I don’t talk much about any of this stuff because I inevitably wind up sounding like I am crazy. Or baked.

“I’m not baked! It just sound like I am!”

After my friend left to go home, I was free to turn my attention inward, which I was eager to do to see if I could trace the contours of my awareness and see if I noticed anything different about it. Obviously I felt different, yes, that was the drug, but what about whether it might confer something interesting in regards to awareness? It all happened quite quickly.

At first I thought it was my imagination. It seemed real, but ever the scientist, I needed some form of proof one way or the other. What had happened was my mind turned to my two children who live on their own now, having grown up. When I thought of them I had the distinct impression that my mind was locking into their own vibration and that I was seeing through their own awareness, something that had not happened before in the way it was happening on that day recently (I keep my distance so as not to spy on my kids). It was novel and different from what I have experienced in years past when I had a connection to someone or when I was running some strong energy that would have an effect on my awareness. I don’t mean to sound contradictory; when awakening came there was a slew of phenomenon that I was peppered with and they all seemed to just happen without knowing how or why. Yes, so I was psychic from having awakened. The Hindu write at length about this, it is a sign of attainment. And everyone is a little different, none of this is a competition. In those earlier cases, my perceptions would become more sharp or would open up more. This would mean I would feel what others around me were feeling. The difference between then and now was that back then I felt like I was tossed bodily into the experience. I felt like I had little say-so about it. I felt it bodily, but what I was feeling or experiencing recently was a lot more controlled. I felt it more as though I was in control of myself, and I had the distinct impression that something in my awareness was able to just slip into these thought-streams and it certainly had the distinct feeling like that was exactly what was happening. Still, maybe it was just my imagination, maybe it was the weed. I took a few moments and surveyed the landscape of the mind of one child and when I decided to pull out of it, it was like breaking the surface of the water and I was out of it. In fact, it was like waking up from a dream where it got to be a little hard to even remember what it was I had just seen and experienced.

Reflexively, my mind turned to my second child, and the experience was completely different. I experienced what felt like a panic attack, but it was unlike any kind I have myself ever experienced before. It came on very fast and then was gone very quickly. While I was experiencing this, it felt completely real to me. What’s more, it showed me something about my child that I had not considered previously. I had seen these sudden outbursts before and I had not understood them, two had happened just recently when I was helping with a move from one apartment to another. It had thrown me for a loop. It was upsetting, and I was left at a loss as to what on earth had just happened. Was it possible that I had gotten inside someone’s head? Was it possible that I was now seeing or experiencing what this child sometimes experiences? In similar fashion as the first experience, when I was out of it, it felt like popping out of the ocean, moving from one phase or mode into another. I was now back in my own local focus. When had that happened before the way I had just experienced it? I couldn’t say that I had experienced reading someone like that in the way I had just done. The difference was that I felt like I was in control of the experience. I was able to pull out when I was ready. I felt like there was this observer in me that was able to watch and then feel what this emotional and mental material meant (or seemed to mean). Still…was it just the weed that had done this, had created the appearance of this phenomenon? Like I have said, it felt like the real thing.

The memory of the experience kept at me the rest of that afternoon. By that evening, I resolved to call my child to compare notes. My only concern was there might be no interest in talking about any of this, but when I did call there was no resistance to discussing it. I was so relieved. I remembered what a psychic friend of mine explained to me many years ago who said that often when we read someone and really see them, when we see them next, they will often tell you everything about what it was that you had seen perhaps a few days or a week before. She explained that it was like some part of them knew that they had been seen, and this is something that sparks a response even if it comes from a more subconscious state. We know, but we don’t know that we know. Perhaps we suddenly feel like we want to tell that person our life story, or one part of it. I had experienced this before with a number of people who I had read in similar ways before, so I had seen some evidence of this being a thing. “Read them and then they will then speak back to you everything that you saw, which is a very good way to confirm without needing to ask that what was seen was accurate.” What was remarkable was how much of a breakthrough it represented in my understanding of another person. It became clear to me that what was experienced was in line with what my child experiences.

The feeling that I had when this scan happened was a sense that I was going deeper into my mind than I normally go. I don’t know how else to describe it than that. I had the distinct impression that I was using or utilizing a part of my brain that doesn’t normally get used and it felt like it was a deep innermost core part of brain and self. Each time that I had this experience happen, I was aware that I was in this very deep place within that had been made possible with the use of the marijuana. Maybe it is a little bit like what we do when we channel? No, strike that; it didn’t feel quite like that. No one was taking me over. I was slipping into a mind-stream and my own inner perceptions were analyzing and sensing what was taking place or what exists within their mind-field of thought and feeling. That is what it seems like from my vantage point right now. One outcome was that I understood a little better how my child might get triggered by me or something I say or do. It was helpful because by being more aware of what I say or do or how I interact, I can in some instances head the triggers off at the pass.

It feels like I have gone full circle in my work and my experience with kundalini. In the beginning, I was swept up by the force of the energy and I had all kinds of unusual experiences taking place that I seemed to have no control over, they simply would happen. I would know things, I would walk past someone on the street and I would feel their painbody or their load that they were carrying around. I didn’t seem to have any control over it or when or how it would happen. Now, though, it felt much more controlled. It felt like I had found that place in the center of my brain where there is this transceiver. It felt just like that. It felt like I went into a place don’t normally go that was quite deep and it was there that I could see in this “new” way. Yes, I have had experiences similar to this before, but now it was also different. Now, it was controllable, more intentional. At first, I felt like I was spying to be honest. But then I also realized, if what I was experiencing was on the mark and not just imagined, then this kind of insight could help me to better understand the behavior and reactions of others who are near me.

Clearing the inner junk is critical for being able to fine tune your inner senses. This is why doing the “work” not only helps you to be free from the distortive effects of your own repressed emotion, but it also can make you clearer as a seer or psychic. It makes your life more peaceful as you integrate the truth of who you really are in a concrete way in your inner sensory landscape. I have seen in myself how stored emotional material can get in the way of inner sensing work. I have also seen in another person that I knew very well who was constantly projecting her own mental illness onto me or others whenever she “read” them. The problem was how readily apparent she was drawing from her own inner index of past material but was unable to see how it was clouding her own inner vision. Another friend who is an established psychic with years of experience counseling others is someone who has worked doggedly most of her adult life to clear and cleanse herself of stored emotional material, and the result is that she can do cold readings that have an incredible level of accuracy. The only difference is one person has done the work and the other person still has a lot of work left to do. So let this be a lesson to you; do your work! One sure sign of what you are seeing is inner material being projected onto the other person is that fear is often involved. When I felt my child I didn’t feel fear, I simply experienced something on a visceral level but I can’t say that “I” was the one feeling it. I was sensing it, yes, but I knew it didn’t originate with me….and that is, I think, the small but significant difference. Mind the gap.

So did weed make me more psychic? Did it open part of my mind in a way that it helped to catalyze this new shift into awareness? Possibly. I find myself having to admit that I will have to conduct a few more controlled experiments first to see if I can more completely confirm what it is exactly that has ben taking place. For all I know this might be something specific to me, but then again, it might not be. I think it is worth taking a look at, especially given how after decades of negative press about marijuana the results are showing that instead of being dangerous, that it has medicinal qualities and for this person, it is a great sleep aid. Much better than taking some complex pharmaceutical compound that might leave you with a host of undesirable side effects.

I’m not rushing out to buy and use. I am, however, quite keen now on seeing what else it might suggest to my consciousness as directions to go. Sometimes a compound in a substance will act like a trap door in our consciousness which we can then go back without the compound in us and recreate through our own native chemistry. How? We meditate on the state that the substance produced in us originally. Does that sound strange? Turns out, people describe how they can recall the states experienced with psychedelics in such a way that they don’t have to actually take the drug again in order to produces its effects in consciousness. THIS is how the plants can help us. We can recreate their effects in our bodies and consciousness if we simply focus on them and remember their effect so clearly that the body itself produces the effect that we are thinking about (which the body is expert at doing). It is amazing when you think about it: if you focus on feeling a certain way, your brain will see this and then your body will begin putting out the chemistry for the state you are imagining.

So? I guess my views on using substances has changed. There is nothing wrong with using them if you understand what you are going into. Psychedelics have been known to help people perform some of the same “exorcisms” of emotional material as kundalini does. There have been a lot of recent studies in this area that involve the use of magic mushrooms that have had some very amazing results for those involved in the studies who took the mushrooms, and were more positive in result than other drugs that are legal to use which can produce many undesirable side effects. That isn’t to say a psychedelic wont produce some intense experiences for the person, the difference is that often when faced with a negative experience, the issue is often being brought up to be healed. Just noticing and seeing that emotion fully for the first time can be enough to break the bonds it has in our subconscious. Ergo, it can be, however hard, a path to authentic healing. And no, it isn’t for everyone.

Absent the drug effects, it seems that all of the same requirements are the same: face the fear or the emotion, see it for what it is, let it play through you but remain dispassionate in relation to it (don’t grab back at the emotion in order to keep it) and it just goes “poof” and is gone forever. Ayahuasca does the same with a lot of vomiting and being led to facing old repressed emotions and fears in order to overcome them. DMT seems to offer some emotional release effects as well. But I think at what point do these things become crutches? No one will know except you. As for me, I am now a little more curious than before and is an old dog who is learning some new tricks.

Narcissism is a term used to describe an emotional dysfunction and personality type. I never knew what a narcissist was until I lived with one. What is so crazy about life with a narcissist is how they are able to operate for years undetected even by their victims. The narcissist is a consummate actor or actress. They don’t even seem to be acting, they appear to be completely convinced of the positions that they take. It is their apparently certainty that makes them hard to spot. They are highly functional people who hold positions often of power and control over other people. They can be leaders, authorities of some kind or another. For a narcissist to be successful there is one thing they need to make it all work: the victim. This isn’t just anyone. This person needs to be unable to understand how a narcissist could in fact be devoid of true feeling and proper emotional boundaries. To the victim the narcissist seems normal. In fact, the victim can often want to believe that the narcissist is a normal person. This can go on for years. I was married to a narcissist for 16 years and most of what she did to me and my children was carefully done behind the scenes, behind my back, so that I was left wondering what on earth was going on. I doubted my sanity, I felt like something was going on but I just didn’t know what. This ate at me, and it wasn’t until years later when family members began coming forward to fill me in on what she had been saying that the behavior all began to make sense.

My abuser was so successful because I was so unwilling to consider what it was she was doing was as bad as it was. No way she could be working against me. No way she could be trying to hurt me by using my children as pawns. I just could not imagine anyone doing that. I mean, who would do such a thing? After all, I had lived with this person and she showed no sign of being the kind of person who would do something like this. Get real, already!

This did happen, though. It was nothing short of a nightmare. After seven years of this kind of petty behavior that drew my children into an abusive spiral, my ex when confronted, refused to admit that she had done anything untoward or wrong. Standing outside my building which I had caught her breaking into, I asked her why she had said the things she did to my children. She looked me straight in the eye and said she had never said such things to my children. Ever. And if you didn’t know her very well, you might believe her, or want to. She sounded….wow, it was a great performance. I think people like this are missing something in their heads and hearts. They think what they are feeling is real but they just don’t know this level of real. it is like they have a reptile brain and they just go along and ape everyone else when it comes to the higher functions of being a mammal or a primate. I know that sounds hard, but after years of this I finally realized that people like this are fundamentally different from the rest of us….and most of us don’t even know that they are.

Years ago I had an old friend from high school who I remained friends with throughout my college years and into after I got out of graduate school. I noticed how she had a string of relationships that always started and ended the same way, over and over. I became her go-to shoulder to cry on when things went south. It wasn’t until years later that I figured it all out; she was having relationships with men in her life that were replays of her relationship with her father, which was strained to say the least. Because she was unable to get past her misgivings with him, she replayed that drama over and over in her relationships with other men in her life. Remember the saying “what you resist persists?” Well, it happened to my friend and later in my life it also happened to me. After I divorced my ex, almost exactly a year after we separated, I became involved with someone who was a carbon copy of my ex in many respects, but with a twist. In this case, this person actually tried to utilize my own kundalini to facilitate hr own awakening. This was something that was done in absentia, or through the etheric, but the result was very real. Strange, but real. A telepathic bond was created that was so strong I was unsure that I would ever be able to break it. My life with this person was an experience of their projecting most everything they suffered from being put onto me. The narcissist has no ability to truly self-reflect. But wait….didn’t she say how sorry she was? Didn’t she say how sorry she was, how horrible she had been only to tell me later how she had gotten better? Turns out this is another part of the abuse spectrum, which is saying how horrible they have been and then begging to be taken back or swearing how they will change even though the behavior never does change in any material way.

My second narcissist told me early on in my knowing her that she hadn’t stayed in any one place for very long. She said she only stayed about five or six years in one place at a time, a pattern that had been with her her whole life. Before knowing me, she had been married for about six years. Before that, she had also been married prior to that. She wound up staying about 5 years in the area before moving on. Publicly she sounded like she had a great life, but privately she expressed how much she disliked her work and how unhappy she was. I saw how she would say one thing to one group of people and say something different to another group. Sometimes, these stories would grow or shrink in scale depending on how stressed or upset she was. It is never about herself, it is always about another person or some other source that is causing the problem. What happens when you combine kundalini with narcissism? Is it even possible? We are all human and the realm of spirit can be nuanced and complex. There are also levels to it. We all go at our own pace and we often get in trouble when we try to define their experience through our own experiential lenses. Fundamentally, there is a dishonesty lying at the base somewhere, a dishonesty with ones own self that keeps a part of the self in a broken and delusional state where these types of people seem to believe that the problem is with the world, or with some person or some other shadowy threat “out there” when in truth, the threat comes from within. Trying to redeem them never works because all of this is an inside job. So the empath can get sucked into trying to help this type of person. Round and round they go until the empathic person finally realizes that the same pattern continues to repeat. It only seemed like they were gaining ground. It was all a show. And the only cure is to cut them free so they can go on and continue their behavior until the universe conspires to reveal to them when they are ready to see the fatal flaw within and then set about healing it. it might not happen in this life, who knows when it happens. It is an inside job. The empath learns a great lesson that it is not their job to save anyone, only themselves. This is the lesson for the empath that will lead them to their own healing, which will take them out of the orbit of people like this in the future. The one thing I had in common with a narcissist was me.

It’s easy to point fingers, harder still to do the work inwardly to look good and hard at your own flaws. And yes, needing to help so much that you are blinded by who the narcissist is is a flaw. It is the one flaw I am working to give up in total. Sometimes the greatest act of compassion is letting go. It doesn’t come easily, but within it lies the greatest of lessons. To be able to cease seeing yourself as a victim in this is the next step. If you were pulled into this type of dynamic, you played a part. It was a great cosmic set up meant to help to show you where the flaws exist on both sides if you are ready to see clearly enough. The most important thing one can do is to forgive yourself for putting yourself through that. I have found that when I do this first, forgiving them comes naturally. This isn’t the usual perfunctory “I forgive you” but is instead a much deeper and ore substantive forgiveness that has the power to shift the draw that we have with people like this. The lesson is learned and when it is, these people lose all their charge for us. This isn’t something you can fake, it has to be done in an authentic way. In some cases, just being away from it long enough can help to create the contrast necessary to see just how bad it all was and how you never want to go back to that kind of madness again.

I was once told that the universe is neutral….but the forces in the universe are not. Whether you are drawn to someone based on negative or positive karma, the draw can often feel very similar….but the difference is what lies beneath. Being able to get to that deeper substratum within the self is where the work lies. It seems the way forward is in being radically honest with yourself. The draw can seem supernatural but the past can be marked by strife and trauma from other lifetimes. All of this is healed with love and that just lets all those threads drop away.

I was actively doing this with my first narcissist years ago in a period of rapid cord removal. It was one of the blessings of kundalini; I just made myself available. What I found that bothered me a good bit at the time was that many of the cords I was dissolving were cords that were tied to my ex at the time. I could feel these taut cords let loose, often in quiet moments, and moments after it was gone I could feel her presence on the other end pulling them back into a taut position. By then, it was too late. But what was so interesting was how she would go into a meltdown within about 12 hours or so after the release. I counted nine times that a cord was released that was tied to her, followed up with her going into an emotional meltdown, upset for some reason or another. It was very instructive to me because it showed me the etheric effects and presence of these lines of influence that work behind the scenes in our lives. Instead of my ex accepting the healing, she went in the other direction completely. She got worse. She got more angry, more mean, and poor thing, she didn’t seem to even know why. All of this felt very dangerous to me because this I knew would lead to her lashing out at me and my children. She was never able to see or sense more deeply to understand what was at the root of her own behavior. It showed me that at least in this life she was not redeemable. She wasn’t about to heal, she was going to hold on for dear life, and that was that. I had married someone who didn’t have it in her to heal in any substantive way, at least not with me around. Narcissist 2.0 was much the same except with the added quality of saying how she was changing while she in fact had not changed. The stumbling block that I had sensed in her from day one remains to this day. Some day she might get around to healing it. I hope she does because it will add a little more peace to the world somewhere, but luckily, it wont be anywhere in my sphere of experience. When I am able to give up these things, the universe has a very efficient way of clearing these people from my life. Thank goodness.

Acceptance is the most adult and most compassionate thing that can be done in my estimation. Narcissists only respect the authority like judges and police, never their victims. Until they can see what it is they have done will they begin to change. Only they can do this work, and who knows how that will play out. It has been incredibly instructive, just as my inner voice had told me it would be, which would be one of my greatest of teachers. It just wasn’t the kind of teacher I thought it would be. But that is fine, because the universe is neutral and sometimes we take the light with the dark and do what we can as we can.

What is interesting is how everything can change when I decide to no longer be silent on the matter. In the case of my first narcissist, writing to one of my children who was affected by what his mother had done was one important outgrowth of this process. It is hard to explain how vulnerable a child can be when their mother is so willing to lie and obfuscate the truth to a young child. What is a child to do? Whom are they to believe? Families can be torn apart by this kind of behavior, something known and parental alienation syndrome. Whether that child can take what I write to heart isn’t what is important at the cosmic level because that child will do what that child’s freewill dictates. However, just by writing the letter some things have shifted for the better. And for my second narcissist, just by writing to that person and letting them know some of the inconvenient truths which I never spoke about (what was the point I wondered?), that alone has begun to bring rapid change in my life at a material level. New people are beginning to filter into my life all with a very different vibe than from before. When we signal we are ready, that signal can often be honored. I think for me, it was long over due.

How To Deal With A Narcissist

But before you deal with a narcissist you might need to figure out if they are a narcissist or not. One thing that is helpful to understand is that when identifying personality disorders, you don’t need to have all of the symptoms present. People exist along a spectrum in all aspects of life. You can easily have someone who has borderline personality disorder who only has half of the stated symptoms as stated in the DMS 5, a guide for health professionals in diagnosing and treating personality disorders. My first narcissist was hard to identify because she had so many behaviors that looked like she was selfless, kind, and caring. When the gloves came off, though, the truth was revealed to me: a lot of this was an act. When she got mad enough, she would start telling me exactly how she felt, and it wasn’t pretty at all. It was in moments of stress that the truth came out and that was when I was able to see for certain that this person said a lot that sounded like she was a kind compassionate person but that these outbursts would show how she really felt. Was she an undercover narcissist? Did she submerge a lot of her behavior that was narcissistic unless there was stress in her life? With narcissist #2, some behaviors were easier to identify right out of the gate. I suspected that this was a replay of my life with the first narcissist, so I think I was more able to watch and observe behavior. With narcissist #2 there was more apologies but with the result of pulling me back into the web of manipulation and chaos. Being able to identify these types can save you from a great deal of strife in the future. Luckily, narcissists are fearful of being found out and will go to great lengths to keep that from happening. In my situation, I was told by my attorney to make notes of my ex’s behavior and to save all texts and emails. This helped a lot in helping to dispel any notion that this was just in my head. The same was repeated for the second narcissist. I saved posts and emails and texts and they helped in creating a library that revealed how contradictory her statements were and how much of a liar she had been. Because she tends to crave others’ attention and approval, having someone who can call them out is not someone who will stick around you if they know that this is the case.

Identifying A Narcissist

Good luck, and take my advice: there is not real dealing with a narcissist. They alone must reach a point where they themselves are willing to change (or an authority imposes it on them). It is better to step away and ask yourself why it was you were drawn to them in the first place.

~Parker

There has been and continues to be a significant amount of deceit and obfuscation in the arena of all things ET on the part of the government. It is amazingly easy to fool people to make them think that people who are working against their best interest and the interest of truth are for them. It is an exploit of a time-tested impulse that all humans have which is their natural desire to trust authority.

If you want to get to the bottom of the ET issue you will need to lay aside what you have been told by the news and the government and pay close attention to personal cases (your own are best or those of trusted friends). Learn to communicate with races who use telepathy as their go-to method for communicating between races. You can do this now. You can learn the CE5 protocols to begin initiating ET contact today. This is the single most powerful “weapon” for truth that can overturn what may well turn into the great deception getting ready to be sold to the world today – ET’s against whom we must protect ourselves. Bear in mind that the narrative has not gotten to the point of ET’s being a threat. Right now there are murmurings. This document is as much historical record as it is to show how the narrative will be rolled out (predictively so). Check back in a couple of years and let’s see where we are by then.

Steven Greer has been a lightening rod in the space of disclosure. There are those within the community of researchers and advocates for disclosure who don’t like the man. I have seen a tireless advocate for the subject who does not back down from a fight, and who has remained consistent for years. It’s very easy to spin stories in this world, there is so little requirement for proof. Greer seeks to provide this and his record has been very good. I, however, always have an edge of skepticism when it comes to ANYONE in the ET arena, but it takes the shape of me taking in vast reams of data and never buying into any of it 100%. Only what I can confirm is what gets slowly moved into the trusted column. Nothing is sacred, and no one is above being something that they do not appear to be. It’s not a fun place to be but there is a lot riding on the subject. Trillions, in fact. It is of utmost importance that everyone see this documentary.

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vimana#/media/File:The_Celestial_Chariot_(6124515635).jpg

Now for something completely different. Following disclosures by the U.S. government of some of what it knows in regards to the U.F.O.’s (rebranded now as Unidentified Aerial Phenomenon or UAP’s), it may help to learn of a project that was undertaken by a linguist that may have shed some light on our ancient past as it relates to the ET presence on the earth.

Mauro Biglino was tapped by the publishing arm of the Vatican to perform its most up to date translation of the oldest versions of the Old Testament in existence. This work, which took some years to complete, included 23 books total. Some books the Vatican decided not to publish since they went against long-standing beliefs concerning what people have long-believed to be the “real story”.

Biglino was familiar with the process that other linguists have performed when translating these documents in the past. A system is used that assumes that certain words in Hebrew result in specific types of translations. In Hebrew there are no consonants, which means that the reader must bear in mind the context of what is being said in order to arrive at the correct words intended. While this isn’t a problem for the bulk of Old Testament reading in Hebrew, there are instances where words can be changed. Biglino thus went to work making a literal translation rather than using the standard program for translation that had been in place for a very long time. While the Vatican approved and printed 17 of his translated books, there were others that they did not publish. In those unpublished works, our understanding of what was written is brought into question, with the result that the Elohim of the Old Testament reads more as beings that came from the sky, who mingled with people of the Earth, and who were involved in the affairs of humans for many generations.

Using his knowledge of other languages like Sumerian, he goes into the Sumerian creation myths and finds that the stories told are startlingly similar in them as those in the Jewish tradition, often bringing up similar people (sometimes with different names) serving the same roles from one culture to the others. In The Jewish tradition there are angelic beings called the Watchers that show up in the Sumerian tradition, for example. In some cases, stories in the Sumerian tradition do not show up in the Jewish one, but bear so many similarities as to the nature of the characters described that Biglino suggests that these may well be the same people, the same story, describing how humans were created by a race that came from the stars. Sound impossible? Judea and Babylon are not far removed from each other, and Jews were taken into slavery by the Babylonians during the reign of Nebuchadnezzar. But, we are told that the Jews had Genesis well before this time. Was it possible that the two cultures had previous contact? It does not seem out of the question.

When Biglino has debated Hebrew and Christian priests on this matter, many have agreed that his translation work is accurate, what they don’t agree with are his conclusions.

From a video presentation Biglino has given explaining some of these issues he says: “Actually the Bible says that we were made using a certain amount of material which contains Elohim’s image and that has been cut out. Now everyone today knows what we are referring to when we say that we take something that contains the image of an individual that has been cut out, it’s the DNA. With all probability this biblical tale is the summary of the Sumerian tablets tale, in particular the “Enuma Elish” that is when the Sumerians tell about the beginning, but where the Sumerians are much more precise than the Bible, because the Sumerians who never thought of creating a religion. They never built a temple, never talked of Gods,the way we mean it, but they spoke of those people….with respect because they were much more developed technologically.” (see video below) Is this merely a coincidence, an appearance, a conflation? If so, then in Biglino’s work, these types of things happen a lot. After a while, it can begin to strain credulity and it gets harder to not see that the Jewish stories and the Babylonian ones weren’t taken from the same root story, which describes how beings called the Annunaki came to earth, described the solar system and the planets within it, and where earth was located in that order (really!) and performed a process that sounds remarkably like cloning or a hybridization of earthly beings (primates) into the species known as humans.

It all sounds incredible, impossible, and this is why you should listen to Biglino explain what it was he found when he translated the Bible in a way it had not been translated before. Biglino suggests that the reason why we have the stories that we do is in large part due to how the translational method has hidden what may be the real truth which has been right under our noses the whole time.

In one tradition, they were beings that came and developed a breeding program, describing what sounds to modern scientific understanding to be a cloning process, or taking a primate and blending their own DNA to produce a being (human) who would be bred as a worker inside gold mines that the Annunaki needed for their home world. What is so interesting about the Sumerian stories of the creation of human kind that it is hard not to see it as beings from another world coming here for a mining expedition. What is curious is how in the Sumerian stories, they describe the use of the gold that they mined, which was suspended in their atmosphere to enact a change in their climate or planetary condition. At first the Annunaki were able to find gold easily, but later had to dig for it and this was where the breeding program came into play. In the Hebrew tradition, much of this material is left out. Biglino describes how the two traditions are describing the same story, with one being an abridged version. Biglino explains that once the literal translation was made, the story was quite different. Instead of one God who created humankind, it was instead a group of beings, and not all of them were on equal standing with one another. Yahweh, for example, was put in charge of a relatively fringe group in a desert region. He wasn’t given the best people or the best location. To hear Biglino explain it, the story takes on a very different implication.

When you read the Enuma Elish and see how similar it is to the Genesis account, what I came to realizing was that these two stories may well have come from the same earlier story which people in the region had been telling for many generations. What makes the Enuma Alish different from the Genesis story is that it includes much more detail. Same story, one shorter, the other longer. The longer story describes how these beings, the Anunaki, came to Earth and began to create a new species of creature on the earth. The story reads almost like a record of all of the failed attempts, pointing out that when the efforts at creating a being (a human) weren’t working, the head Anunaki offered his own (genetic) material from his body, thinking that it would somehow be the answer. But, this turned out to be disastrous. If the Anunaki were divine beings it seems that all of this fiddling would not be necessary. The account reads of numerous failed biological experiments: one being upon being made urinates constantly until it becomes dehydrated and dies. Another has its organs on the outside of its body. Still another does not have eyes. In each case the humans are created in what looks like a vessel like a bath which is situated in the ground. In all cases, humans are made using the blood of the gods. When you look beyond the talk of gods and goddesses, the story reads as a group of people who came who wanted a work force who would serve them. The deeper you go into the story, the more details that surface that look….well…consistent with physical beings instead of gods. Biglino points out how the Anunaki asked for humans to make burnt offerings because their chief god liked the smell, that it was favorable to him. He goes on to explain that during the Apollo missions, the material from the suits was used to create a scent that astronauts were provided with in order to get them used to the smell of space. It turns out that when astronauts were coming back into the capsule from being on the moon that there was a smell that was often described as smelling like burnt meat. Biglino asks the question, did these beings like this smell of burned meat because they were space-faring beings who had grown accustomed to it? In the Jewish tradition, the Elohim (which is plural not singular—itself a paradox since YHWY says that there are no others “beside me”) are told that they are the “Chosen” People. In modern day abduction literature the ET’s tell many abductees that they too have been chosen. When Biglino translates the encounter that Moses has with the Elohim on the Mount it begins to read like an ET encounter in which a heavy object which flies, comes up to the Mount and shows itself to Moses. Moses is told that he has to hide in a cleft in the rock or else he might die from exposure to something coming from the object. In the traditional translation this is because the glory of God is so great that it can kill a person. But how can a spiritual quality physically kill a person, Biglino asks? This reads as a physical effect that causes a physical outcome. What is interesting is that when Moses comes down from the Mount, part os his face is burned from his sighting and his close proximity to the craft. He has a cloth covering his head as it was in the full sun and he later felt poorly enough that we then went into his tent for the rest of the day. Moses sees the Elohim because he tells the voice in his head which has been speaking to him that he needs some proof as to the reality of the being and what it had been telling him telepathically. He explains that he needs to be able to tell the people below that this phenomenon is real and he isn’t just hearing voices in his head. You can perhaps understand his position: he is their leader and now he is going on about how he is hearing this clear voice in his head telling him what to do. Up until now the voice has led them out of Egypt, but humans are humans and require continuous proof if they themselves are not witness to it.

Here you can see his presentation from which the above quote is extracted:

The complete presentation can be viewed in the next video (below). It provides a lot of the background concerning the work that Biglino was tapped to do for the Church and how it proceeded. He also explains how he searched the roots of the words that he translated literally, which will help to explain how his translation take on a very different meaning especially the earliest books. If you would like to skip to the most relevant material, go to the 10:00 mark in the following video, which is where he goes into the translation and meaning of RUACH, the beginning of unwinding this translational tale.

It is worth mentioning that in India they have detailed descriptions of flying craft called Vimana. These devices are described not in a mythical fashion as one might expect with a chariot of the gods, but instead reads like a users manual. No allusions, no parables, no mythic language. One such vimana is called the chakra vimana. Chakra means disc. Flying disc. This is the same description made of ET craft. What gives? According to Biglino, similar craft are described in the ancient texts like the Bible but their meaning has been hidden behind the way in which the translations were made to turn ET’s into gods. If you watch the video you will see how Biglino dives into the device that David uses when he fights the giants. Biglino explains that this device is described as a communication device that brings the Elohim to David whereupon he is taken up into a flying object and taken to the Temple where others get out. Biglino goes to Ezekiel and the object he describes there is drawn by a technician at M.I.T. and the result? It certainly sounds and looks like a flying ship, and not altogether different looking than the description of the Indian vimana.

There is also very compelling evidence of early Christians being aware of an ET presence, which they called the Archons. This is largely contained within the mystic writings of early Christianity and were pushed out by the more exoteric wing of Christianity which would today be known as the Orthodox church. In 100 A.D to the mid second century, however, the mystics existed alongside the exoteric-minded followers of Christ. In their books, specifically The Hypostasis of the Archons (p.161, The Nag Hammadi Library, John Robinson, ed.) and the First Apocalypse of James (p. 265, The Nag Hammadi Library, John Robinson, ed.), the Archons are mentioned in some detail. In the Apocalypse of James, Jesus is explaining how beings called the Archons, Described in the Hypstasis as looking like an aborted fetus, come in threes and attempt to take souls by theft. Only by performing a series of declaratory statements can one escape their efforts to take the person. In the Hypostasis of the Archons it is explained that these beings exert a form of synthetic reality called HAL which makes it seem as though they are like gods (but they are not), and also that these beings are often involved in wanting to interbreed with human women. The Gnostic Christians, as may be clear, were not fans of these beings, but how they describe them suit the modern abduction literature in some pretty amazing ways. In the modern ET literature (Budd Hopkins, Whitley Strieber to name a few) it is widely known that the ET grays perform their activities in threes and are able to take a person “by theft” or, that is, against their will through a form of mind control. In the modern abduction stories abductions always take place with three of the alien grays (there are some instances where this does not happen, but the “three” grays are a regular occurrence in the literature).

It is worth noting that books like the Hypostasis of the Archons were scrubbed from any mention in ancient or modern Orthodox Christianity. It was only in 1945 that these and over 50 books from this line of early Christian thought reemerged in an amazing discovery in the desert of Egypt near the town of Nag Hammadi. This was the same year that a giant trove of Jewish scrolls were discovered in Qumran near the Dead Sea. What is so interesting about this mystic strand of so-called Gnostic writings, is that they describe the process of awakening and its many effects. What these early Christians caught onto was nothing less than what the Hindu describe in their own texts as kundalini. It is interesting how when given some of the most sophisticated documents pertaining to the process of enlightenment, the church has chosen to remand them to obscurity. I will also point out that there is a high correlation between awakening and encounters or awareness of ET or other intelligence which could be called “galactic” in character (not human) which those awakened report communing with or having a sense of connection with (some suspect that they have had past lives AS ET’s, and this turns out to be somewhat common in the abduction community, too).

Further, when the Gnostic Christians began to explore the spiritual dimensions which were opened to them with their practice of seeking, they found what many find: a presence which underlies all things, is wedded to every molecule and resides within it, and is a silent presence that observes creation. Encounters with this presence were described as a pure white light in which existed a consciousness of a being that was pure love and compassion. Just entering into this light in meditation would change a person. They then saw how the God of the Old Testament was at odds with what they had themselves uncovered. They then created a myth to explain why the God of the Old Testament was so different from the God which they had discovered and it played out this way: The world was created from a failed attempt at creation, what is called a demiurge. Sophia, the feminine aspect of the divine went off and tried to create a world on her own without the father. This explains why the world is the way it is, because it was “begotten” imperfectly. Sorry, ladies, it seems men from the past can’t help but heap blame on women. While the story of the demiurge seeks to explain why things are they way they are, I observe that this was done in order to make sense, to do what many people do when faced with contradictory accounts in Biblical stories both Old Testament and New, which is they seek to harmonize them in some way that then makes sense. In the early Christian harmonization the God of the Old Testament is jealous and wrathful because he wasn’t really God at all, but a being that arose from an improper creation. Well that explains it! The real God was there all along. Me, I see people who were looking at an imperfect being, which could have been a physical being, an Annunaki from elsewhere, who acted like a god or who was raised to that status over generations in the old stories. When I awoke and began feeling the presence in the Light, I had a similar reaction: the God from the Old Testament does not cohere to my own direct experience. Was that “god” in the Old Testament even a god at all? When Jesus brought the “new covenant” was this equal to his pointing to the old God as being at odds with the God which we find when we seek within and which other cultures might call the Tao or Brahma, The Great Mystery, etc.?

Could it be that in our past we had contact with races from other planets, races that took an interest in us, perhaps even creating us using local planetary stock along with their own D.N.A.? In the abduction literature, those individuals who claim to have been taken onboard ET craft to be examined and who had sperm and ovum extracted, among other things, have reported that the ET’s told them when their captors were told that they had no right to be doing what they were doing said, “We DO have a right. We MADE you.” Now a human living today, unaware of our ancient past as far as the Annunaki and the creation myths are concerned, this might be impossible to hear, but given what Mauro Biglino and others have to say on the subject, it might be a relevant retort.

It might seem impossible to splice D.N.A. from a completely different species from another planet to that on another planet. However, consider that the universe is a very old place and it is not out of the realm of possibility that life here could have been seeded not just by comets, but by space-faring civilizations with an interest in spreading the genome far and wide. In billions of years it is not out of the question that what we think of as our D.N.A. could be part of a much larger subset of a D.N.A. spectrum that has a lot more in common with life on other planets than we might want to admit. Just the fact that nearly all ET’s are described as a “five star” (one head, two arms, two legs) arrangement could reveal that evolution of life beyond our planet may well have proceed along more similar lines than we might believe is possible (either seeded far and wide or a factor present in cosmic evolution). All ET’s are upright humanoid looking beings which, in some cases, have very different features, yet they tend to have all of the same features that we do (but in different proportions—smaller ears or noses, larger heads or eyes, etc.), but it is this kind of similarity that poses a unique question. Are they a version of us, or we a version of them? Or, is it just possible that cosmos-wide, all of nature, terran or not, there might be a preference for advanced life to share certain traits that wind up being common?

Most believers recoil in the face of the possibility that their cherished notions might be part of a different story. I have always been interested in the “marginalia” of our world because as is often the case today’s myth often had a way of becoming tomorrows certainty. The universe is a much stranger place than we could ever imagine.

~Parker

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