My apologies for being absent. It has been a busy time as I begin to move into a much more active phase of my creative life. Much change is afoot as I seek to bring into my life a more sustained and substantive focus on the creative in my work. It isn’t that it wasn’t creative before…..I was more limited in what I could do. In some ways, I was making plans all along, but having to log those ideas until waiting was done and action could be fulfilled.
Last year I began a funding effort to bring a new product to market. I am now in the latter part of bringing this project to fruition with the creation of a new lighting innovation that I call the Gaia Lamp. This type of accent lighting will help to bring a new level of comfort and joy to those who know its glow in their lives. Because of what we now know the role the pineal has in regulating sleep cycles, the type of light that my lamp will produce will be perfect for helping people to better regulate their own production of melatonin, something that is secreted by the pineal. With so many people exposed to screens on phones and computers that put out a bluish white light, this type of light has had the result of tricking the pineal into thinking it is day time (blue light happens during the day by the way). The hope is that exposure to this artisan design will bring not just a sense of peace but an ability to feel sleepy and enter dream time more easily. And for that matter, ANY kind of warm light will do the trick. Mine does it in style. But by all means, if you can put a fire in the fireplace, enjoy the benefits that this kind of light has for you. Your pineal and your mind will thank you as you get better and more sound sleep.
Being able to do this project has meant that I have moved back into glass production. It has kept me busy, it has brought my body back to a better state of tone and my hands build in strength each day turning the pipe and hoisting the glass around the studio. I have missed this. So yes, my hands will look rough and feel rough, but my body will feel more alive and more focused on what I know and do best; bringing new glass designs to the fore. Now, however, perhaps for the first time, I will be fusing my design work with my spiritual work. This feels like the culminations of years’ of work. And now, I get to do so on my own terms without needing to filter or be concerned about how others around me will react or judge or behave. This is for me. Finally. And it feels great!
I have felt as though I have had all of this creative potential just locked up for the last seven years. Having gone through a series of disruptive events financially in my life from an injury in late 2007, to a divorce a year and a half later, to being unemployed, displaced from my home, and wondering just what on earth I was going to do, to slowly but surely working my way back to a new life, I can now see a light at the end of the tunnel and it turns out that it is not a train. I am now ready to begin the action phase of a dream that has been years in the making. So far what has flowed out of this effort has all been good and are getting better by the day. Normally, I am not one to brag. But after all these years, a few good things have happened, and it has been because something in me has wanted it more than I feared I might mess it up. We can self-sabotage to easily especially when we are unaware of the shadows that still remain to be scattered. The deep well of inspiration that has been with me since childhood now is put to the test, is brought back into a new context, and it is time. So many in my life I think have wanted so much to be inspired, creative, and have latched onto that glory trail in many ways. On the one hand, we all do this and benefit from it, learning what the inspired state is. On the other, there is also the shadowed side of it, which does not always benefit us and makes us smaller, instead of bigger. We all must learn to live by our own light even as we watch the lights of others until we can trust that, yes, we each have something important to contribute, to provide, to give, and to bring forth from within ourselves. All of us.
Some have questioned this inspired state, and I can think of nothing more distorting as any effort we make to try to turn or change what it is that we each natively feel and create. Think about suggesting that what Mozart wrote wasn’t really his own, that he doesn’t really feel what he created. Sometimes, you just have to let people be who they are, illusions and all. We are all contradictions, a patch work of full and empty pieces. We each are knitting this patchwork into something that is whole and complete……through the growing realization that we are all born perfect…..and then ego comes along and undoes that marvelous work and makes a problem where beauty and grace resided. And maybe we do this to test ourselves, to make ourselves into this concept that we are somehow broken and limited and unable to kiss the blue sky of heaven. To get there, you go. You do not look back, you get there by doing. From the heart of your intent action will flow. Perfectly? Probably not. But does this stop us? No, it doesn’t. So go with all the passion and grace as you can muster and don’t get down on yourself when you falter. Get back up and go!
I am getting back up and I am going. Blue sky of heaven awaits. Something in us, that little bit of heaven, calls to us even as we see just stormy skies. Behind them is that marvelous brightness that is at once who we are and what heaven is. I promise.
So I hope that this does not spell a silent spell for me. In some ways, I have more material to write about than ever before…..so many observations, so many experiences to put down, all crowding in for a voice. I just don’t know how much I will have time for in the days to come. Maybe someday WP will have a voice to text feature that works well so I can work and write all at once. Or maybe, I will just wait and write snippets. Such beautiful things slip through my days in those moments when I least expect it.
If our efforts are like particles racing to their destination, our intent acts like the power of the wave. It is this wave that is truly without limit. When you can let that wave move around the margins and plunge headlong into your life, you can know the true power this universe holds for all of us. Amazing things await each of us.