Archives for posts with tag: prana

We all are familiar with the seven major chakras that are situated along the torso of our bodies, but would it interest you to know that there are many thousands of minor chakras all through the body?

The ancients knew, who developed their understanding of the subtle energy system known by the Chinese as the meridians and naddi by the Indians, that this system carried chi or prana. This subtle energy system also had the ability to record or contain emotional energy that would then serve to effect the proper flow of the subtle energy. This is the energy of both life and consciousness. Releasing this blocked energy helps to make for a more peaceful and authentic life (more naturally enjoyable).

In the Indian system, one worked to clear this material as a precursor to raising kundalini. Doing so, they contend, makes awakening the kundalini, our hidden energetic potential, a less chaotic an affair. As Westerners, though, we tend not to have these practices available to us, so we often have to go about it differently. Lucky for us, kundalini will help clear the stuck, knotted, or blocked energy (albeit in a more intense fashion for a time).

Most often when we speak of chakras we think of the major seven, but as I have pointed out here before, there are many others. The energy we call prana is itself conscious. The more that we tune that in, the more we can be enriched by its limitless knowledge and potential.

The swami’s of India teach about knowledge that does not come from the senses but comes through ones consciousness, which is itself a sensing means for the knowing that can come from “tuning in.” It makes sense, then, that clearing away the detritus within can help you to see and feel more clearly. As Westerners, we are catching on a bit late, but we are catching on.

I have known people who were unable to do this clearing work. Their minds are clouded by the material that masks their inner perception. I can say being with these folks is challenging because they cannot see what is truly there and they feed off perceptions colored by their innermost emotional baggage. Do you want to be that person? Many teachers point to this as an absolute necessity to do asap. I concur. It takes time and patience, but you also have all the time in the world.

What you do today stays with you as an indelible accomplishment. Plus, what you do not finish now can be picked up in your next life. If my experience is any guide, you will pick this work up again in another body and what you release now wont be there when you pick it up again (hint: this work is too important to the soul not to continue with!). If you begin and develop a strong enough interest, it will carry through. Plus, you may be reading this because an earlier version of you in time was involved in a similar pursuit.

I have noticed a keen interest taken in the posts I have done on leg chakras previously. We have them, but little is said about them. Because of how little they are covered, not much is known in a popular way about them. You can find several posts on this subject by using the search bar and it will take you to those.

In one post, I describe each chakra in the legs and what energies in consciousness that they align with. This post is for people who are used to meditation and are able to sit quitly enough to begin to feel into their energy that we call prana or chi.

I will point out for those interested that the points in the legs where energy can get stuck can often be effectively released by a good body worker or massage therapist very often. This is done by way of deep tissue massage along with the practitioner who can sense of feel where the stuck energy is. I have found some very accomplished energy workers in this field. There are othee methods such as Chi Kung (also spelled Gung), acupressure and acupuncture.

Not long ago I described a healing meditation that could be used to arouse prana for helping to heal blocked energy through a simple position of the hands together. You could say that the hands help to enrich and activate prana in the body when you can wuiet your mind and place your focus only on your hands (no “doing”).

In the meditation which I refer to as a foot “mudra” it is possible to begin to tap into the awareness that you have of the energies that flow through the legs along with the energetics of consciousness that reside there in feeling.

There is something that happens at the subtle level when we bring hands or fingers together from each side of the body. The existence of mudras acknowledges this. What happens when you bring your hands together like this on an energetic level is you are joining the energies, in part, of the whole field of your energy body in the upper torso part of the field. We call this Ida and Pengali, the masculine and feminine. While there is a large channel of these two running up the torso alongside the central channel called the shushuma, there are channels in the arms and legs that also have these lines or channels in them (because consciousness exists as a result of the union of these seeming opposites in ourselves, even at the level of the energy, which merge moment by moment to generate all phenomenon).

When we place thumb and index finger on one hand together in a mudra position, what happens is we are joining the circuitry from different parts of the energy body in that region together. If you can dial up your sensitivity to feeling your energy, you can feel a subtle difference energetically and in consciousness between thumb and index finger touching than, say, your thumb and middle finger. For those who try this and don’t feel anything, my suggestion is that you need to try tuning in more. Get quiet. Let your thoughts quiet down. Feel your energy. You may only feel the edge of something at first, but given optimal conditions of introspective curiosity and a receptive openess to feeling your own energy, you can tune this in like a faraway radio signal more and more. You accomplish this less by trying and more by allowing, letting down those noisy barriers you didn’t even realize you had. I know this is supposed to be about the feet, so here we go.

If you want to try this “mudra” as I call it, simply sit with feet uncovered and place them together. You might want to calm down and center yourself by performing some breathwork which is well suited for this. I have always found breathing like how we breathe when we are asleep to be highly effective because it signals to the body that you are relaxed. It is a great trick.

Slow steady breath in, hold it for a two or three count, and let it go in a slow steady exhale. Pause at the bottom for a second or two, and repeat a number of times. You will find yourself feeling much calmer in no time. You can keep a slow gentle breath throughout this exercise, and how long you do this is up to you.

There is nothing gained in feeling uncomfortable. I know some yoga practices teach you to deal with feeling uncomfortable in the hopes of your being able to stay in a given position for long periods, but my experience has shown me that you will be much more succesful if you can adopt a posture that you will remain comfortable in so discomfort doesn’t even enter in. There is nothing honorable in feeling physical discomfort. When prana flows at a high enough level, you will experience supreme bliss. This is what all methods are there for. There is no reason to climb a mountain in boots that make you feel like you are slipping and falling. The point is reaching this beautiful place as efficiently as possible. So be comfortable because you will want to keep at it more. When you realize that cosmic consciousness is for all of us as an aspect of what we are, you might begin to appreciate how we are all the same deep down. We are each like glasses filked with water. Qualitatively, what is the difference between the water in your glass and the water in the ocean?? The only difference is in quantity. You are a bit of the cosmic. All water knows itself and the drop knows it is also the ocean. It is a beautiful thing and it waits for when you are ready. This work can help you along the way…

I have done this posture before and I have had others who are like me in terms of their awareness of their energy in their bodies, and the results have been interesting when I have asked them to take this position. I discovered this position in meditation when my inner voice told me to place my feet together.

So sit like this, quiet mind, letting thoughts coming and going without getting hooked on any one thought, and feel your energy. Just feel. Feet together, breathe to calm your mind and body. Don’t try to do anything or force anything in your mind. This is all about checking in a little more deeply than you are used to. By not trying to make this into anything, see if any sort of impressions begin to arise without your trying to turn them into anything. Don’t judge, just observe. You can keep your breath gentle, deep and slow, if you want.

Take note of what you feel or what seems to express in your mind. You are just a reporter here, so you can take this time for yourself to simply observe.

In work like this it is sometimes possible to encounter the effects of blocked energy. You could feel the edge of an emotion that might get stronger, but let it come and don’t feel like you have to break through anything. Let them be like air bubbles that float up to the surface. Try not to react negatively to what you feel or may seem to feel; your emotions are like thoughts. Thoughts are the result of your reaction to something, but it may not be the whole story, so do your best not to get hung up on what you feel or see. Often just being aware can cause them to dislodge and rise.

I think of the legs as aligning to our most problematic emotions, but also to the simpler and more primal ones. They can be expressed in a positive or negative polarity and any energy stuck down there might be pretty hard, but this is why I am telling you to be as neutral as you can be. I think it is fair to say that many people have a hard time bringing the light of their awareness to this region both in their bodies and their consciousness because of this. Bear in mind that anything troublesome that you might feel is only energy which has gotten stuck in a negative polarity. That same energy is waiting to be turned to its positive pole through a simple act of forgiving yourself for whatever that energy represents. It is easy to turn hard into soft if you remain detached and keep your wits about you. On the other hand, you should always consider your comfort zone and know when enough is enough. That said, with each exploration, you can gently push the envelope bit by bit so that in time you make progress through this deep dive into yourself.

For those already familiar with energy and who may have awakened kundalini, it may be that this work may feel intense. I found myself wanting to turn away from what I felt the deeper I went, but I also found that by simply bringing the light of my awareness to this place that I shook things up, like how a spade turns old hard earth. Each exploration was a benefit.

I have also performed this posture with hands clasped together at the same time, which is akin to turning all currents, save the crown and root, into themselves. Since there isn’t a lot that seems to be taught on this position (one form of yoga expressly states not to use this bound foot position while others do), I would be interested in whatever it is that you find yourself experiencing.

There you go. I hope that this adds another wrinkle that you can try discovering. If you try it let me know what you think. If you liked this post, let me know by hitting the like button. I’m never sure if the things I find interesting get through the same way with others, so it’s helpful to get feedback.

~Blessings~

P.

Advertisements

My awakening came gradually. It came in somewhat measured steps. The first step clearly opened me to a strong flow of prana and my first experience of nonduality. Then, over five months, I began having innexplicable events occurring that led me deeper. A friend loaned me a hemisync cd for clearing emotional baggage. Another gave me a meditation technique I have detailed in the last post.

A Voice spoke in my mind telling me to close my eyes and focus on the center of my brow. Complying, I awakened my third eye, a process that expanded over several days once I focused my attention there and saw the fiery brightly lit eye emerge into my field of vision. Then I was taught or tutored in how to alter my consciousness to take advantage of the wave-form part of our consciousness, the part we call the feminine, the Shakti, the right brain and left side of the body. Everything was unfolding, gradually, carefully, as if by some plan. I wrote about it to close friends. I had no idea what it was leading to.

I had several events that all directed me along a path to awakening in a way that left me the last to know what all of these things were adding up to. Clearly, a higher intelligence was involved. This is not to say everyone must awaken the way I did. What is clear to me, because of my own experience, that at the base of awakening is an effort to break through a logjam of trapped energy to liberate or open a hole within us that will let the water of life stream in. First a trickle (for me), and growing stronger each day, each week, until my body was conditioned enough so the full rising event could come. A breaking through this logjam.

One of the events that took place in October of 2006 was a day-long acceleration of prana, which was a preview of what kundalini would bring. I had a vivid vision-a certainty in inner vision and through intensely felt feelings-about how all life feels prana or life force in the same way when it is felt abundantly (which is all kundalini really is—unusually high levels of pranic flow).

Getting ready to go home, this information nagged and pulled at me until I put it down on my computer starting at 7:30 pm and finishing at 7:34 pm (I had no idea why I should note the start and ending time but I did…now try and type what I typed in under four minutes).

This writing spoke of prana and how it was affecting both my body and mind. After writing this, I would find myself experiencing an odd synchronicity involving my finding the only magazine on a rack full of popular magazines whose content was uninteresting to me except one magazine I had to hunt for around a corner, blocked by a card rack placed in front of it. Without anything on its outside to suggest its contents, I would find that it had an article that read in bold: “When it comes to seeds, it’s all about sex.” Here is the piece I wrote to try and get that stuff out of my head, a first brush with a powerful burst of prana.


The Yearning

The fields are wet from rain after the corn has been harvested. Trees slowly turn from green to yellow, then gold. The air cools and the mind thinks back on days when life was brimming over and the air was thick with the smell of pollen. The same corn, now nothing but stubble, stood gold and green with tassels swaying with the breeze, releasing its sweet nutty smell. To some it was just a delightful thing that marks the passage of seasons. To me, its more than that. It speaks of life seeking its own, making itself over; a new generation. A yearning, a leaning toward the wind in the hopes that Nature will take care of Nature, and carry its life giving sweetness on the air to waiting seeds, waiting for that breath of life, that germ of passion that makes the flowers grow, and makes life turn ‘round once more in the endless cycles this world is known for.

Seeds and plants and pollen, all lean into passion in ways we can scarcely imagine. For this is the glue that keeps life going. For them, it must be pleasurable, a passionate act of giving, a release, an immersion into a mystery far older than our own known seasons, our own individual lives and experiences. For this is the gravity that pulls them, moves them to continue. How can it be any other? Why then would life seek to replace itself through an act as perfunctory as the dropping of an apple from a tree? No, the drop of the apple is not perfunctory, or a second thought, but part of a yearning to become, a part of merging with some larger dance. If trees can’t feel this, then why continue? Why go on? Perhaps in measures we can only guess or imagine, there is some divine spark of wantonness, of passion and pleasure bound up within their shells of being. How can it be any other? Perhaps there is a secret life these rooted beings feel that is beyond our ken, beyond our too quickened ways. We have been “beyond” these beings for so long that they are now “just plants.” And yet, they are more. They will speak if only you will listen, and they yearn to tell of this ancient dance, this incredible desire and passion bound up within every cell of their being, so it pays if you will only listen.

I know that seeds seek and yearn and hope and dream; dreams perhaps that are so different I could never scarcely imagine or see them for what they are. And yet, it seems inescapable that these creatures, ancient as all of life here, yearn for the touch of pollen upon their seed pods and enclosures, waiting patiently for the bee to carry their spawn beyond them into other regions where others await the touch of the life giving sparks that enliven and awaken a new generation. Even the warming caress of sun and drenching rain is an act of divine providence, or giving in a wheel that knows no end and no beginning. Quiet and still, these beings mask their greater inner lives.

So even we do these same things, even we make this dance of longing and yearning, so old and ancient that its root can escape us as we are caught up as if in some whirlwind, some deeper dance both of passion and letting go as we give ourselves to life’s great mystery, to its passionate embrace, and longing that brings us to this place, this wonder filled state where our minds and bodies and hearts are excited beyond the normal trebling that life gives or provides.
To touch my eye with your eye, to touch smile to smile, or hand to hand, we join in this ancient dance, this passionate longing for life seeking to complete itself, and in so doing, complete ourselves. Round and round we turn, like stars upon an endless wheel that rolls and ducks and sways in the lost night of time. We are carried one by the other, some by our imaginings, some by the reality, but always by the same glue that keeps life turning turning back and forward at once, calling to the roots of what it was to the heavens of what it will become.

So as our hands embrace, our smiles merge, as face becomes face, and eye becomes eye; as flesh becomes flesh, we excite in this dance, this subtle movement first tentative, then more certain as we are gathered by the compass of its certainty, of its need to move as it moves, which is ever forward into endless days and tomorrows.

We came here as boundless beings who knew neither limit nor touch, and followed down into narrow pathways into minds of earthlings, like spirits on a cosmic voyage, we entered the world of limit and pain and loneliness, only to be called back by forces that were brought to bear in this world, moving us through realms of limit and bounding to that greater reminder that this is a dance of mystery, passion, and love. In this love we touch the infinite, wrapped in that which pulls and grabs us like hawk talons grasping talons in a spiral dance of yearning, moving us one step beyond this one, seeking the divine, seeking the infinite. 10/13/06 – 7:30-7:34 p.m.

IMG_6366

Sunset over St Marks Nature Preserve, Wakulla County Florida. Copyright Parker Stafford 2018

 

Several years ago I decided to interview people who had experienced awakening for inclusion on this blog.  This was an effort to help bring the perspective of those who have experienced the phenomenon to the fore in order to help others who have gone through this life changing event to gain perspective, understanding, and perhaps greater awareness. I have recently published two of those interviews and they have been given their own page which are located under the header at the top of the page.

 

It is hard to know how much awakening can change your life.  It is like a quantum leap into the unknown.  It is bewildering.  It crowns just as it crucifies.  Navigating it is at once easy, difficult, with old rules now completely out the window.  It leaves many feeling scattered to the four winds sometimes, and yet it is also a saving grace.  It is powerful medicine.  Many awaken without a background in any philosophy or religion to provide a framework for the experience.  My sense, as it was perhaps my own experience, that we have much more to learn from awakening when we don’t have those frameworks in place. This is for the simple reason that we face the phenomenon without preconceived notions of what it is that we are experiencing.  We don’t get “captured” by the “rules” of other groups who, I note, have been unable to glimpse the larger potential that awakening offers us. While the experience happens in every culture and corner of the world, there is also a rising tide within the Christian church, factions of it, who would paint this as an inauthentic experience, what is called a “counterfeit spirit.”  Sadly, there are those who would resist the universality of this experience and they do so out of nothing more than ignorance.  The only way to deal with ignorance is with education, with information, and with what we find to be true (rather than what we believe) from direct experience.

 

There are plenty of frameworks that do speak of awakening and many of them wind up, for me at least, to include just as much belief as they include factual information, which to my mind makes it a mixed bag.  To know the truth, it seems, we have to go beyond what the masses are saying about it in order to learn to trust our own experience.  This is a lonely proposition and can put us at odds with the mainstream (like Advaita or Neoadvaita for example).  While awakening has very specific symptoms and signs, it leads us to an awareness that places us in a whole new kind of mind and heart space.  This can be a lonely road for many of us.  The interviews reminds you that you are not alone, that you are part of what appears to be a growing number of people waking up all around the same time frame.  Curious, perhaps purposeful, we can each learn from each other.  This is my hope.

 

My hope,too, is that we can build a library of these interviews for the assistance of anyone wanting to learn more about the experience, be they curious or an “experiencer” themselves.  If you have had an awakening and would like to add your voice to the chorus, your interview is welcome here.  Interviews are kept anonymous if you wish, but very real people are behind them.  You can simply respond in the comments section and I will arrange to receive your answers to the questions (which are just a jumping-off point) for inclusion here.  I am interested in whatever insight that you feel that you have, regardless of what others may say about awakening (or even myself) because we all have a lot to learn.

Everything you believe is the world making you feel a certain way and is just you feeling and responding from a place that is constituted by your own inner dialog of beliefs about what you think the world is all about (and everything in it- people and their actions as well as events and everything else in the world).

I have spent a lifetime sensing energy. I did this as a result of an inner sense that awakened in me when I was much younger. Its been 35 years now, and I have collected a vast amount of observational data about this inner sense, and a majority of it has been checked to see if what was seen energetically has a basis in that person’s real life (the person being read). The result has been consistently accurate observations.

Through decades of this awareness I found that my gift afforded me an objective reality about how things were as it has been expressed energetically through people and their inner light. When I awakened two decades later, what I found was that while the feeling side of my inner sensing trebled with awakening, I was also reacting to energy in a much less objective way. A sudden turnabout!

I used to think that I felt everyone’s energy in the early days of my awakening when I was experiencing what I thought was a bewildering barrage of energy. What I found was that no, I actually was not doing that. I was only able to determine this through observing many cases of my own reaction to these energetic reactions. Most people I have spoken to about this topic of feeling other people’s energy, and its clear to me that everyone believes they are accurately feeling everyone’s energy. What’s actually happening, in my experience, is a large part of what this post is about….which is how subjective our inner senses can become.

Let me try and explain how this works. First, we do feel energy from others internally, brought to us courtesy of at least a degree of nonduality. Nonduality is what allows us to feel the energy of another person in my observation. Nonduality means “no other” and helps express a fundamental character of consciousness that allows us,to perceive life as utterly connected with everything. A result of this state is that we can feel the energetic state of another as if its our own. We may in fact be feeling the energy directly and even accurately at the outset. But then once that is done, everyone begins to distort that energy right away simply by adding their own reaction to the energy experience. I say this because I have done it and I have observed up close others I have known doing it also. In one case a person I knew who believed she was an empath described my energy in a way that it became clear that she was experiencing her own energetic state and not my own. How’s that for taking projection to a whole new level?

A person with a clear connection to high-order energy through the higher self can be picked up by another person and interpreted in highly distorted ways, such as fear-based reactions which is the most common reaction it seems. Yes, we can sense others’ energy, bit sadly most of my boots on the ground experience has shown me that a large part of it has been distorted or filtered through a persons own inner biases or worldview (yes really). Its a state that has led me to being single and uninterested in relationships with people who claim awakening. No thank you, not until you have your shit worked through.

I have actually seen a person try to make me into a stand-in for a person that the individual sensing me knew decades in the past who had abused that person. This then resulted in an assumption that I was also an abuser even though no abuse had occurred. This sounds crazy, but this gets even stranger, and it helps to show how a person distorts the truth that is right in front of them. Adding the idea that they are awakened only makes that person even more delusional. It results in those prone to emotional dishonesty to further delude themselves by thinking because they awoke no way their perceptions could be wrong! Right? These are the things train wrecks are made of.

This person went on to allege that I was assaulting my students sexually. I can’t begin to tell you how scary it is to be caught up in a lie like this. For men wrongfully accused, the public treats this kind of accusation as the truth first (its because people overwhelmingly have a bias that makes them think why would a woman lie about something like this?). Add to that that this person was involved in fielding complaints from students as well as faculty and staff at the school where I teach, and what you have is very effective cover for a person who is seeking to destroy someone, like me, for trivial reasons. Yes, it actually happened just like this. When I confronted this person she said that she had a right to free speech, effectively defending her supposed right to say anything she wanted to say…even if it was a lie as well as a subversion of an oath she made professionally when she began this type of work. Really. Imagine being railroaded by something like this! And no, the accusation was not true in the least. I have never behaved in a way anywhere near to approaching sexual harrassment or assault (her words were “assault”). If this had been the case, I would have been fired from my job years ago. Instead, I continued to teach and was kept in after the curriculum changed that ended the classes that i taught. I was told that I was an asset to the department and I went on to teach graduate courses and other course material tangentially related to my field. My evaluations from my students were all in the excellent range all but my first year teaching (I was a green teacher at first!). I continued to teach until voluntarily stepping down in order to pursue my studio business full time two years ago. I never once had a single discipkinary action taken against me related to sexual harrassment or assault as had been alleged by this person. Its hard, though, when people will believe a lie before the truth, but this is the unfortunate case in our culture. Women have and continue to smear men with accusations such as these. ..and we believe them. We believed the story in Rolling Stone a few years back until it was revealed that the story had in fact been made up. Meanwhile, the male students caught in this deception had their lives and reputations ruined.

One more aspect needs to be added here. I copied and archived all of these accusations when I began to see that they were happening. The accusation this person made stated that I was insinuating myself into others energy simply because I could and because of my being awakened. These accusations were full of paranoid suppositions and assertions that were designed to scare the crap out of a person reading it. It probably made for dramatic reading, but none of it was true.

The reality? The reality is that when I read an article that I think is insightful I often comment on it if I have the time to do so. At no point do I somehow glomb onto another person’s energy. In my experience, these kinds of energetic events that this person was saying I was engaged in were for me events that were rare and hapoened spontaneously (both felt the energy and both embraced it in a consenting fashion). In my life I have experienced the “twin soul” phenomenon and have experienced three connections that were of this order of magnitude. The person in question was one of these people.

The Take away from this experience was that people absolutely can, and do, completely get it wrong and do so on a regular basis. In my case maybe you could say God-Source was trying to get my attention with an uncredibly overblown example of just how far people can and do get tjings wrong that they “feel” about another person. And maybe, too, part of the take away was for me to be able to see the abuse of power that people engage in on a daily basis in state and governmental institutions every day. The pount here, this person backed all of this up with “I know this because I am an empath.”

When I look at the daily news about Russia-gate for example, I see this very same quality of human mayure at work. I was jyst watching interviews with Bill Binney, an NSA whistleblower who first revealed how the government was spying on the American peoole prior to 911. He has shown through careful analysis that all of the assertions made about the Gussifer attack is false. The consequences involve Mueller being in posession of classified documents from the NSA for which he has zero clearance for and which is a felony and may actually run afoul of the espionage act. Really. But where on the news have you heard this startling revelation? Nowhere except independent sources not beholden to higher corrupt powers. Meanwhile, people who believe that yhe msinstream media is an unimpeachable source to be trusted buy into the lie and we are carried along on the current, and consequences, of that lie. As result the lie has to be supported, told over and over, which naturally leads to still more lies (or you get found out as a liar). This is the problem; too much pride to admit you were in the wrong or that you sought to deceive.

All of this stems from energy a person feels and then turned into an elaborate and convoluted lie that went on for years. Can we distort the energy as we feel it inside of ourselves? Absolutely! There is what is andvthen there is our reaction to what is. Those, dear reader, are two compleyely different realities very often. Most often. In fact, im not sure I have never encountered a completely clear channel that didn’t “futz” with the data coming through them. We are like stained glass windows always coloring the pure white light coming through us. So yes, it happens. It even happens to me. But what I do is I try to learn from it by getting down into the underlying source of the problem. This is no mean task because it has taken me years in some cases to dig down bto the roots in order to reveal them and lay the axe to them.

Over the years I have found that in the three cases where I had a strong connection to other people, there were patterns related to how we were drawn together. Some were karmic but one was not. When I feel the energy of another person I can now learn a lot about where I am in my own inner process by how I respind energetically to them. To do this requires me to be aware that there is even a reaction going on. Its actually very easy, deceptively easy, to miss the part where you are creating a reaction. This reaction turns into a feeling and the feeling gets turned into a judgement. All of this happens so fast, so effortlessly, that its seemingly impossible to catch that its even happening.

The best way to tell if what I’m telling you is the truth is to do the work and see if you can catch what I have caught in upur day yo day interactions with people or events. You have to be able to bring the Observer or Witness self into the equation in order to properly observe this tendency in us. This is a very neutral part of yourself. Highly mental people have a harder time getting to open to it than others who are more intuitive. It might also be achieved by asking simple questions of people who all saw or experienced the same event. The key is in asking non-leading questions that elicit honest responses and then look at what you get.

This is a bit of a digression, but its important to show how our individual belief and bias forms our reality inside our heafs and even our hearts.

I only responded to energy that had a ressonant frequency that was either the same or opposite of my own. I could turn on my inner energy sensing of the human energy field, read an aura, see all aspects present in a person, but all of it was without feeling. I saw as one would see a bird, a tree, or a stone. Simple. When I felt like I was really feeling another, I was mostly responding to something similar in myself. In other cases, I would feel an opposite or complimentary energy of feeling. The issue that I never saw at first was that I wasn’t really responding and feeling their energy, I was only responding to how I felt about that person and their energy…or even sometines only one small element or aspect in that person.

Lets say I had a bad experience with a person whose energy feels expansive. After that, I might haveca bad association to anyone whose energy is expansive, say. But all of the people downstream from that initial event may in fact have been perfectly fine people who dont show a disregard for others, say. In my mind, though, my fear takes the day and rules over it. I feel fear and it makes me think I am feeling genuine fear about that person in my presrnt moment who just reminds me of this person from years ago. At this point, Im now caught in a feeling and because I believe my insights are always right, I buy into my feeling. I might buy into it so much that create lies that i tell about a person much like happened to me. Since this kind of behavior is hard for me to relate to, its hard for me to always understand what the motivating factor is for some people. Maybe its because the motivating factor is always different for each person….and that makes it hard for me to relate to or to understand? Perhaps.

So in my experience, whenever i was engaged in this type of interpretive behavior, I effectively was cherry picking what I was feeling….and my own response to another person was only my response. I brought my own judgements, ideas, and biases about whatever it was into the moment. I have had conversations with healers, some quite gifted, and while they have picked up on a host of very valid things in regards to their clients, choosing to feel a certain way has always been a very personal affair. What Im saying is we can’t ever really know how a person feels about what it is that they might be feeling. You might think that no, we all feel the same way, but you would be wrong I think.

I have had feelings picked up by healers or empathic people that didnt bear on me at all….but they picked up on it not because it was a prominent aspect of my own inner landscape, but they were picking it out from a lineup of many other elements because it stuck out for them.

Its hard to be completely clear as a healer. A number of years ago I had a reading by this man who said to me that I came here to go into the healing arts. I said that my inner guidance had told me that I needed to work on me first in order to be as clear and thus as neutral as possible before I did healing work.

In Native American healing arts the most healed person in the tribe was the healer most often. They were a healer for the very reason that they were neutral. Because they didn’t carry a wound like your own was precisely the reason why they were so good at healing you. They were able to go right into the energy and supplant their own energy as a ressonant field or realm of influence that the patient’s own energy would naturally atune itself to. This is what I call entrainment. By holding a vibration strongly and clearly enough, others naturally come into the same vibration as you…provided that they consent and are open and ready for it.

Bring an unhealed energy into the same healing session and its probable that nit only wont you heal that person, you will only make their issues worse by sending them into the wrong direction. As a result, its very important to either be a clear channel or use healing methods that don’t even bring feeling into it. You could very easily be injecting what it is your thinking about a client rather than what is. The man conducting my reading went on to explain that I would achieve this clarity by beginning to learn methods for healing. Perhaps he was right, and as a result of this I decided to learn about a healing modality called Reiki Tummo.

I found after years of digging deep and systematically clearing my field that some things eluded me. Reiki Tummo provided a timely method for reaching into a place that I had felt stuck on in my clearing process. I also found that people who I thought the universe had sent along the way as teachers or catalysts usually only served to bring up old junk that could best be healed in a solitary way. Some people even served as a retrograding force. Some woukd call these people mirrors but what I found was that no, they were all seeing their own junk in their own way, often while wanting to project the stuff that they couldn’t face up to themselves onto others. This is like being in a tar pit and not really wanting out even though you are thrashing around acting like you are. Instead, the person just wants you dragged down into the tar with them. They just need love and some sympathy but they also need a good dose of self reliance, a belief in themselves instead of relying on others to do the work that is only theirs to do. Beware the tar pit people!

Do your work, remain humble, seek what is true and expect to be human all the way…but also expect the higher self to have more and more purchase in you for helping you to move mountains. It is possible if you cultivate a sense of devotion to those forces in you that can bring powerful healing much like how a miracle comes. Sudden…almost unexpectedly.

Everything you feel about others remains full of your own inner biases. It isn’t as though you can’t know things, it’s that in such close quarters its hard to see what is truly theirs and what is yours. So be slow to judge, and be observant. Sometimes it is more about you than you might care to admit. I’ll admit that this is so for me. The yoke will grow easy.

I am a work in progress. Will this observation be superceded by a still clearer version of the truth…time will tell. Until later….

Here is a draft from a few years ago, part of my backlog of posts that I am bringing forward so it can be out there for what they are worth. This is a very busy time of the year for me, so it is nice to have this backlog….


440px-ecstasy_of_saint_teresa_september_2015-2a

I came to awakening without having been raised in a tradition or philosophy. Yes, my family went to church for a time, but I didn’t join when it came time to do that (and luckily I was allowed to decide for myself). I was always listening to the voice in my heart that tended to caution me about buying into a religious or philosophical construct.

I spent my life in a solo singular approach, seeking out those sources that reflected back to me what spoke to my own growing body of inner truth. In the 80’s I heard the album by Van Morrison “No Guru No Method No Teacher” and found a common sense of belonging to a path that comes from within.

The advantage, to my mind, of this “path” is that we learn to rely on our own inner compass point instead of relying on dogmas from other outside authorities. There is so much in our world that has distortions. Most every philosophy and religion has them. I would be called a nit-picker to point out some, but others are quite big and substantive. This is not to say that there aren’t traditions that aren’t good or useful, it is just that my inner guidance kept me from buying into any one of these paths. Along with this resisting joining or buying into a religion or school of thought was the feeling or expectation of a ‘big reveal’ that was going to happen further down the line. That inner voice was telling me that all of this was building to something.

….And then awakening came and so much was made plain to me about religion, spirit, the world….

It feels like to me that in many ways (not all, but many) that I have been called to seek the light within in order to bring forward the perennial teachings. Now, I know what this might sound like, but I do this for myself. I know growing up, the one thing I was most interested in were the “secrets of the universe.” I also realized that no one else was interested in these things like I was. Not many, anyway. So it isn’t as though I do this for an audience of any kind….I do it because I want the truth. I know; and now I’m writing about it…doesn’t that suggest that I am all about the audience? Not like that.

I share what I come across for anyone who cares to read…so in this way, I very much keep away from the teacher and guru model. Over and over people want a link, a book, a teacher, when the real rubber- meeting-the-road moment happens within. I understand, but enlightenment is waaay simpler, way more foundational an event within the self. No methods, no postures. It is so simple but hard for most it seems. So simple it can be transmitted by a look, a breath, a sigh.

I prefer to be an example for a way to be. It turns out that others have done this also and it is Jiddu Krisnamurti who espoused the “Pathless Path” in his own work. So my impulse or inner directive is not a singular one since there are others who have done the same thing. So with that bit of babble, what I am saying here is something that I came across from what I would call an inner teaching has helped me to understand desire in a way that isn’t often talked about and is also often misunderstood.

In most religions and philosophies, there is a strand or need to describe desire as something that is bad. In other traditions, desire is considered a bad thing, something that is meant to be eschewed. What I have found, though, is that this is actually being filtered through a bias that serves to cause a good deal of misunderstanding about the natural path through the self as a way to work through the issues that remain.

These issues are stored emotions that are contained not just in the brain, but are all throughout the body and is contained and recorded from life to life through the pranamaykosha or the sum total of what we think of as the Light Body.

The “problem” with desire is that what we call prana is itself full of desire. EVERY SINGLE PERSON who has ever been touched by high levels of prana has felt how desire has been intensified. Now you might think that this is just a reaction to an outside stimulus, but in the world of the nondual, any belief about the seperateness of phenomenon quickly is dismissed when you experience how all phenomenon is connected (like Dr. Bronner used to say: “all-one”).

This is one reason why awakening bears with it considerable desire of all kinds. Now, this is not just because when you awaken that prana is stirring these desires (of all kinds), but is the very basis of prana. Yes, personal desires are stirred, but this isn’t all that is at work. The crux of this is that there are issues that we each have that result in desires that are distorted.

Imagine a pure light streaming through a window that is colored with stains that distort this pure light. This is what I am talking about here. We forget the nature of prana and thus also kundalini as being full of desire. Who doesn’t see the stimulating effects that kundalini has on the body who has gone through this? I saw effects of age slow, then reverse for a time before age continued forward more slowly than before.

This desire, though, is a perfected light that does not have the same distortions or blocked forms within it. We are experiencing this advanced energy in our bodies and consciousness while also experiencing what happens when that light strikes our own light bodies, which are most often chock full of blocks when awakening comes (because in the West we do not have traditions that properly help us to prepare for awakening—at least not yet). But we often hear about how bad desire is and how many monks will spend their lives eschewing desire. This leads to all kinds of problems.

One problem is how in Christianity we have shunted aside women as active participants in it (there have been no female popes and no female cardinals or priests (or priestesses)). In Islam, it is much the same. The covering of the feminine is considered a form of protecting modesty, but it is actually doing something else, which is holding back men from learning how to deal with their own energy in such a way that they can work on their blocks and move into this purer kind of light. This is simply one example of how this state of being has been distorted and so misunderstood. The path through desire is not to resist, but to work through it and you cannot do this without facing all of your junk. If you think desire is some bad thing like I have described, then you are hobbling yourself. You will find that your capacity to bring heaven on earth will be greatly limited. But the question naturally arises, does this mean that we must embrace our desires in order to work through them?

The answer to my mind is no. However, it does mean that you do need to raise your awareness about where you are in your development. To do that, you need to be able to see how your desires are causing you problems.

Can you ask yourself if your desires are causing you problems? Can you observe the truth in this by observing what happens in your life? If you are experiencing awakening, you know how powerful this desire can be…and you can feel both this higher desire, which is this light that is moving through you, but you can also feel how this same light of prana is also activating a slew of other lesser desires, and it is natural for us to be drawn to our earthly desires. This is about learning to align to a higher vibrational state. When I hear about people seeking to “ascend” I wonder do people really know what this even means?

Sometimes I see people who are trying to ascend the hardest are the ones who are suffering the most. Simply, this is just holding onto blocks that keep these lower vibrational desires activated. So here’s a secret; if you respond to the reaction that you get from a block, you will never dig that block out. What you need to do is to actually find the stored emotion, not what that emotion is generating. Address that, and you are at the source. Blocks can fool you. You got hurt and you have been placing blame on others ever since. The problem here is as long as you are doing this, you are NOT addressing the initial reaction that you had that causes the block to begin with. I know people who are still going around in circles with something from childhood that they are too invested in how they felt they were hurt by others. This is the trap, you see. The universe does not give a whoop who did what. The only thing that matters is your reaction. You can let yourself be stuck in your reactions. You can be stuck for your whole life, even.

I say this as someone who has known this all too well. We hold onto these things because they feel so wonderfully strong and when we feel something that is so strong, we naturally get drawn to it. What I can tell you is that there is a higher power, a higher vibration that is available to us when we can do the work to cleanse the pranamayakosha (or Light Body).

Early in my awakening, when I began to really get involved in figuring out ways to help assist in releasing these blocked energies (which are often traumas) I began to be visited by higher vibrational beings. They came after awakening ramped up and began to accelerate, which made awakening difficult for a time. One of these spiritual visitors was someone whom I learned was my life guide, someone who revealed himself over twenty years ago to me, but who seemed to disappear for a long time.

When he showed up, he explained who he was. This turned out to be an angel from the Old Testament, called a Seraphim based on what it was he said to me. I never knew much about the angels, so I had to look his history up on the internet. It’s strange to find that the things that I saw about him were actually described in his description in the Old Testament accounts.

He showed up in my room at about four a.m. He walked over to my bed and explained that he needed to take something out of me. In a very matter of fact way he said “You are much more beautiful without this…” and he reached into my heart chakra and removed a dark body from my light body. This was itself amazingly vivid and it felt as though an inner body was being pulled out of me that had no bones. It was pulled away with a feeling of tearing at two points at the top of my lungs, up in the shoulders. But the moment that he reached into my heart center, I had a pulse of energy that was beyond anything I can even begin to describe. I was completely awed by my ability to experience this energy. I had never felt anything like this. It was like bliss X 1,000.00. This was a transformative experience in that I was able to see what is possible for us resting in potential. I wondered how on earth I was able to feel this, it seemed so beyond anything in our world. What this did was it showed me what I had to do in terms of work.

Needless to say, this has served as a kind of peak to look for within myself, to know that as I release more of the hurdles that are in the way within me that have accumulated over this life and other lives, I know that with dedication to this way of being that I can attain this pure light that is known by others seemingly more advanced than we.

You see, these blocks are tied up in beliefs that we have about ourselves that serve to hold us back. These are big and small and very often they are almost always limiting us. When you think about this energy of prana as a sentient energy (which it is), you are dealing with an energy that is limitless. Is it any wonder, then, that we experience synchronicities and perfectly timed events when kundalini (prana) begins to flow so strongly? When we are aligned within ourselves without limitations, what we wish for is unimpeded in its movement through the pranic field. When this happens, the field responds and it begins to create with us. Well, it is actually always creating with us, but the problem we so often talk about is how some of our wishes don’t come true. Instead, we have other things happen that hold us in a state that is “less than.”

The reason this is happening this way is because there is a competing belief that literally cancels out the signal of the wish that you wish could come to pass. Remove or resolve/change the belief and you open the flow and path for this wish to come true. To do this requires honesty and surrender.

Now bear in mind that I am not espousing some materialistic angle on spirituality that will bring you your wildest dreams for the sake of greed. Instead, when aligned to the highest within you, and when that alignment is not being cancelled by competing beliefs, that energy will flow in accord with how clear you are and the result that you get wont be filled with glitches like they so often might be. For example, here you are, you are finding you can wish for things and they happen. Great. You land that job you really needed in some new part of the country for the next leg of your journey and it is just what you need. That is one hurdle removed. But once you get in that job suddenly you find people emerging from the woodwork who seem to be the same color of some past experiences that you thought maybe you had dealt with, but obviously not because here they are causing you trouble. These people are part of a pattern from your past and they remain for as long as you have this belief still within you because that belief about yourself is actually activating physical reality along those same lines. The universe is super intelligent and it will bring you things that are bizarrely perfectly aligned with your stuff that you have not yet dealt with. Its like God is sending you something. But you are doing this. You. You are working with this amazingly creative force that is forming the physical and supporting it and bringing you all of this energy. It is up to you how you use it. If you are holding limiting beliefs, the universe dutifully brings you limited results.

We live limited lives in part because we believe that we are limited beings. We think we are just this one body, and we have created both consciousness and culture to close our larger being down, but we are much more. Being able to tap into what we truly are, which is a vessel for this shining light, is a very good first start. Only then can we know what is possible.

You can begin to taste this by removing the blocked energy in your field. As you do, you will find gradually, that things will get easier and easier. In fact, desire itself will change. It will get better, stronger, more cosmic, but also more peaceful. I think we all know just how chaotic awakening can make us feel especially in the beginning. But this is not because of our upbringing or because of another person making us feel a certain way or any of that. We feel this chaos because we are the chaos. Work through it, and it will go away, never to return.

The thing about doing this work is that desire does not go away, it get better. The thing about this work is that we realize over and over that no one else is ever the problem, we are. When you can turn the lantern of your awareness into yourself and dare to see all of your broken places and roll up your sleeves and ask the universe how to heal it, it quite naturally will begin to show you ways to do that. When I said I wanted to clear away the dross, my awakening accelerated because I had someone telling me where the blocks were and who to go see to take care of some of them. I had books and I had dreams, I had realizations in meditation or throughout the day, all showing up in amazingly perfect timing over and over. These things were not based in the old way of doing things but of being willing to finally be really honest with myself about my own shit.

The other side of desire that limits us is our shame. It keeps us locked in a prison most often. We don’t want to be seen as “less than” so we put on these masks or we try to hide in order to get through our days. Someone once said that we should be as children and we will know the kingdom. We need to return to a kind of openness and innocence in our work I think in order for it to go more smoothly. We might need to get used to the idea that things are going to change and that the intense current we are feeling in awakening is likely coming from holding our fingers over the end of the hose. No, more energy is not flowing, it is being impeded. Impeding the light will make everything seem intense and strong, but it is holding back the flow. This happens the first five years of aeakening for most people (some it can take much longer, some, fewer, for less time).

When we hold back, we are also holding back or denying what we are destined to be. There is no reason to feel shame that you have not reached perfection. The truth is, no such perfection exists, we just keep getting better and better. I mean really. if you think of the supreme consciousness and how advanced it is and how it interpenetrates the entirety of all things and knows each sparrow that falls, then that is a pretty high bar to set, don’t you think? So don’t be silly; ascension is simply a process that goes on and on. Maybe its even a good idea to let that old husk of an idea go because at some point all that striving will actually serve to limit you. There is no arrival, there is no real ascension save for a continuum of becoming and improving ourselves continuously forever. When we can be like children, we are no longer impressed so much by big productions and hunger for the really simple things…like play (creating).

So I say this to speak to myself because I am telling myself what I need to remember. Since I have experienced this, I have no hesitation sharing it because when you share what you know and what has served you as genuine, it will work for others too. Our fields are part of the same field. All are connected. Our consciousness divides “this” from “that” creating arbitrary and sometimes not too arbitrary divisions. Some are important for a time but fall away.

Even as I am writing this, I can feel the presence of the future and those who will be reading it. I know that my own energy will meet the reader, you, and something in me that is entirely without word will remind you of what it is that you are and what you are capable of. And this happens all the time. It is only a reminder.

The goal of desire is to teach us about our need to create and how central this is in our universe. We create all the time and we do so out of desire….desire of all kinds…and those creations are a mirror for where we are in our development like how children are a biological mirror in part of who the parent are. As you clear desire of the blocks, desire will grow ever more powerful and it will be….simpler, less impeded, and it wont trip you up as much as it did in the past. it wont be that you will feel any less desire, it is that the desire that you feel will be free from limiting ways of getting energized by things that aren’t good for you. It isn’t that desire is bad, it is that so many people can’t get over the hump of their own junk enough to see that desire actually changes and does so in a wonderful way. No, this is not about denying desire, and if you do, you will forestall your development, I promise you that. If you release fear then you might find yourself more easy with others so your own energy can just fill a room without any hesitation. You wont be afraid of somehow being captured by another person’s energy because you are so sure of your own. You will be more easy in yourself and desire will simply be aligned to a higher purpose. This wont be something that you think with your mind, it will be something that you feel all through you. And even then, you might still have things to work on…like all of us.

But the homework for today is; what is the source of desire? What IS desire? if prana IS desire-filled, then what is its parentage, its origins? What is animating prana?

I think desire is here to help us to refine the way we feel. It is to help us to feel. Most tend to pooh-poohs feeling, but the truth here is in order to know peace and contentment, we first need to understand all of the things that color our feeling. When the consciousness is clarified, we don’t get tossed about by our knee-jerk and hot button issues all of which are being driven by the result of the repressed emotions, the blocks I have been discussing all along here. I’m talking about a version of you that you were always meant to know. Now isn’t this interesting, a great mystery to help yourself unravel.

If you ask the question how do I do this work, the first and most important step is to learn how to help facilitate the release of stored energy in the body. Kundalini helps immensely with this, but you can also facilitate its removal greatly with a variety of methods. Qi Gong is very helpful especially in the first five years, but so is a method called TRE which uses tremor movement (shaking) to tap into an ability that we have to release stored trauma. It can work remarkably well. There is body work or deep tissue massage by an intuitive therapist who can feel blocks in your body. There is also forms of yoga that involve helping to clear the energy channels in the light body that hold these blocks. Being creative is itself very helpful also. There are many methods that can assist you in releasing this material.

~P.

serveimage-2

As I look over our history as a species, from the Middle East and the religions it spawned, to the East and the philosophies, the almost-religions that stopped short of being those because they do not espouse worship of a deity or a god of any kind, I see a pattern emerge as it relates to our creative energy and all of its relatives; except under very specific conditions creative energy is only allowed to be expressed in certain ways.  I am dealing with creative energy in a very broad sense here, so if you thought creative energy was that part of us that solved problems or helped create new things like cars or rockets to the moon or music and art, hang on.  Creative energy, I have come to see includes all aspects of our being, from our desire to create art to our desire to build bridges and civilizations.  Our creativity also includes the forces that maintain our bodies and it also includes our capacity, our ability, to create more of ourselves through sexual intercourse between men and women.  All of this to my mind and experience is part of a cosmic strand that divides out in numerous ways in our consciousness but has at its root an energy that in its origin is wild and free.

The problem in our world today is that except as noted previously, creative energy has been tamped down, controlled.  Churches have done this by instilling a sense of shame about our sexuality. We were to not trust our sexuality or our urges least of all so we relied on our religions to tell us what was what.  And you know, I am not convinced that it was for good.  Look at the scandals rocking the Catholic church and they don’t seem to stop. The Pope speaks out about it, but its like it is some monolithic structure with little accountability or willingness to change.  If you doubt what I am saying here, just do a historical church of the scandals that have taken place with the Catholic church over the years and you will begin to see how difficult this issue is.  Part of it stems from requiring priests to be chaste.  I am just going to say that when our creative fires are so narrowly focused there will always be trouble. Creativity was meant to be wild and free, not tamed, and here we are with our religions trying to tame what really was meant to set us free.  And instead, we are prisoners.

I will admit that what I say about prana is my take.  People are keen to try and point out that our perception is just perception, so human, so frail, so likely to be distorted.  But you know, this time, I don’t think so.  As I read about the hundreds, thousands, even, of experiences describing the bliss of the flow of prana, I see the same thing. It’s seen as a goddess, perhaps, wild and free, powerful.  But this energy is in all of us, the place where our inner man and inner woman meet, the explosion of opposites.  That is the definition of kundalini….which is nothing more than this: prana in supreme abundance (finally!). What I observe is what everyone else observes.  People may have different reactions to it.  Some might close down, some might open up.  Some might open and close in turns.  Some will be highly insightful, some will realize there is more to their ability to plumb their depths.  All through it, prana is the wild child to me, a liberating and spiritually lubricating force.

20180723_224032-2109998378.jpg

Torus form with multiple sheathes/fields

Prana is creative.  It stimulates all centers of the body when there is an abundance of it.  The ancients described bliss that was off the charts due to the increased flow of this energy.  As I sit writing this, I feel a steady-state experience of bliss.  I came to this level of bliss as a result of a lot of inner work.  I instinctively knew that if I followed what kundalini was doing that things would get easier.  They have.  I still have my challenges that I deal with, but they change with every realization or inner breakthrough.  I know that in my case that prana has fueled wildly vigorous creative energy.  In fact, I had to be creative in the arts in order to build enough of a flow in my body to sustain the current level of bliss that I feel.  When I go into the energy I can feel its wildness.  I can feel that it was never intended to be tamed.  yes, it is like water and will flow into any container in which it is poured, but the vessel itself is what limits or allows the flow of this force.

As someone who deals with awakening on a daily basis for over a decade, I luagh at the videos of teachers telling people how to awaken the kundalini.  The “Sat Nam!” breath that is one part hammer and one part release into the Mystery.  i know that if I had to depend on an exercise like that to awaken I think I should wait a very long time.  Maybe someone figured out that it worked for some folks, but I direct the flow of prana by way of feeling only.  This has always been what has opened the gates….always.  Even teachers who say prana is breath are wrong; prana is a fine energy that is in no way contained in the air.  No, prana moves by way of feeling. In fact, feeling is how we actually communicate to the cosmos. it is how the dream is made manifest (I write about this extensively in the blog so do a search to find out more).

The chakras are energy centers and every one has an emotional vibration connected to it.  This “emotive power” inherent in the chakras is born out of this feeling quality I am talking about.  No, people shut down their chakras and thus prana when they feel a hard feeling instead of a soft opening feeling.  And even if a million teachers say prana is breath, it does not make it right even once.  It just means that they themselves do not understand prana or have not been able to stimulate prana with anything other than breath (and this tells me as the observer that they may be lacking in their ability to connect with their feeling side of themselves to boot!). I know it might sound pedantic, but I promise you that it isn’t.  When we understand something so simple as prana responding to feeling, we can get ourselves on the right track in our own work for bringin in more of it so that its flow can heal (which it does).

Breath, when properly used, has a stimulating effect on the body which in turn stimulates prana. It isn’t even that the chakras respond to thought, it is deeper still than that.  Feeling….the whole world is lacking in feeling and awareness of their power to feel.  People who are not awakened will laugh at this, but trust me, the world carries a level of numbness in them…..even awakened people.  The journey to full feeling can take some time.  I know that I have been gifted with a kind of energetic “reset” by a healer who revealed the true depth of my woundedness, which sent me into a very real sense of physical pain (which was itself emotional/spiritual but now boosted by the presence of prana so it feels physical), so I know that we can go merrily along with the work of awakening only to find, “holy bejebus! there is so much more!” even years later.  So this is why all of this can become such a journey for people.  This is a journey to realization.  Realization comes about as a result of awareness.  Sometimes, once in a great while, we can meet people who we connect so deeply with that they share something about themselves that can spark all sorts of realizations within ourselves.  Some are direct, some tangential.  Some are unintended.  But this is why relationship has been so important in awakening and is also one aspect that is largely denied by the world’s religions as a bona fide religious or spiritual “practice.”

Yes, prana is creative. There are stories of how women who have undergone awakening have experienced a sense as though they were pregnant, that they were going to birth something. A close family friend confided in me during one of our talks about her awakening process that she went through a period of time when she could feel her body wanting to physically birth something. She sensed that this was part of her awakening process, but it was a curious experience to her.  When I explained to her that many other women have reported the same experience it made her feel a little less crazy. The experiences have all been extremely similar and I think that it points to powerful energies that are creative in nature but that operate at higher dimensional levels and are having their effect in our day-to-day lives (because it’s all connected now).

So I think that when we are faced with the spirit and the higher self, it is quite natural for higher-order experiences to be transmitted into the language of the body, to be related to our bodies as well as all other levels of ourselves.  I have noticed that at a certain level the self knows itself to be One with all things, so naturally the creative energy of prana is the same as the creativity of our personalities, the same creativity of our physical bodies in making babies, and who knows what other forms of creative output there are in other realms of experience that we have yet to discover as sentient beings. What is universal is that creativity always feels blissful.  When we create babies in the physical our bodies provide us with an orgasm to make the experience that much more filled with reward, but creative energy also brings chills and goosebumps to creators of music and art.  It at once expresses and evokes powerful feeling. People who have awakened almost all go through intense creative bursts.  As an artist I can say that my awakening has fueled a number of new directions in my work that would have never existed before.  It’s a little crazy in a way just how crowded my inner landscape is with ideas.  My only challenge is in bringing these ideas to fruition.  And, in the way that prana also works, it speeds up manifesting many-times over.  For example, when I began thinking about how close I was to reopening my studio practice after teaching, without saying a word, but thinking how I would like to have some good assistants, I received one highly qualified request for being involved in some part-time capacity at the studio making work as well as two beginners who expressed a sincere desire to learn the discipline.  The interesting part of this is how well-timed it was.  By now, I am not surprised by any of this, but I know that when my prana flow increases, it accelerates manifestation of desired outcomes.  That said, it might bring me a person who WANTS to work in my field, but it does not guarantee that they will be excellent or that they will decide to stay with it a year or even a week later. Sometimes, you have to dig deeper to find where these glitches exist.  But that is for another time.

But here is the problem as I see it, at least as it relates to many of our institutions on earth,  which is that our creativity has been hijacked.  It’s not some demonic conspiracy to enslave humanity, just a desire to tamp down creativity because it scares people who are in positions of power.  One thing I know about power is that the vast majority of institutions and the people within then have a great need to control.  This control on the one hand may have been intended to keep people from killing each other or behave badly, but the other side of the coin has been that it also limits freedom.  It limits our creativity.  When I look at what I have seen in my meditations about creativity and how wild and free it is and when I look at the human race, I see a big disconnect.  And the problem? Here is your problem…..

We value war and destroying in the name of greed and the usurpation of land and wealth through military invasions and keeping our race held hostage by the fear of the next fabricated threat that the military industrial complex decides to come up with next (read your history on this—most of our wars have been coups on the part of the CIA or an effort to fool us into war, this didn’t start with the invasion of Iraq, this has been going on for a long time). We are taught that to be a man we must be warlike, unfeeling.  Women have their place, perhaps one of the greatest fonts of creative energy alive on the planet and our women are shut down to such an unbelievable degree. Their thought process mimics men in their rational approach, with that fabulous intuitive and feminine character of soul nearly gone.   Really, you have no idea.  But so are the men shut down.  We all are, so don’t think I am picking on anyone in particular.  But men are shut down in such a way that it creates this rage and it just keeps feeding their desire to go to war so they can just kill something.  This, my friends, is creativity turned into itself.  This is the dark side of the creative force.  Do I really need to point this out to you? Men who don’t know how to command their sexual energy, women who are afraid of these men, and then women who aren’t in command of their own sexual energy too, and use their emotional forces of manipulation to work things in their favor.  It is a crazy mixed up mess if you ask me.

Our institutions by and large forswear sexual expression as a necessity to make babies, but by and large, we have incredible taboos placed on our sexuality.  While there are good reasons for governing behavior in theory, my observation is that our attempts to govern sexual energy result in greater dysfunction than ever.  Men pitted against women, the war of the sexes, men not in possession of their source of power and women not in full possession of their source of power either.  All the while we are taught that our sexual nature is dirty, that lust is not redeemable, and forget having sex if its lustful.  In fact, most of our institutions teach us how to sublimate sexual energy as a convenient way of side-stepping the issue altogether. In many parts of Asia its as though the teaching of Zen Buddhism and Taoism and other strands of Buddhism would rather deal with packaging bliss so that its no longer sexual as their axis mundi for solving the problem.  Women no longer in possession of themselves will never engage a man at the level of his divinity for very long, but the exact same can be said for men with their women.  I ask; how did we get here? I feel like I am in that video by the Talking Heads for the song Once In A Lifetime where a clearly out of control David Byrne seeks to illustrate the chaos of our lives as controlled beings while desiring finding the flow of life.

When I step back from this madness, I can feel a world within me swirling with the forces of creation in a way that I had always hoped to be able to feel, actually.  I had always hoped prior to awakening that creative energy was this vivid and strong (and it is). But when I look at the world I see we have a long way to go, baby.  We have a long way to go because we have squashed the creativity of the feminine and masculine both.

It’s interesting to me how as men begin to soften, kundalini is coming onto the scene also as women are learning how to find their own strength and their own sovereignty.  I observe that on a collective level humans are reaching across the aisle and integrating more of their opposites into their lives especially over the last twenty years (which also corresponds with the sudden increase of awakening (I could be wrong, but I don’t buy that these awakenings are due to someone decided it will be, but are the result of a myriad of factors all resulting in the changes we see today.  If you know how awakening is itself defined by the fusion of opposites in consciousness, then you can perhaps appreciate how it is that we now have a mass awakening taking place on the planet. Right. Now. And honestly, I observe that the progress we have made not just for hundreds of years, but especially during this last century, just happens to be of a kind that favors the fusion of opposites.  What if instead of this being some grand cosmic event as many want to say it is, we are simply glimpsing the natural result of people having reached a kind of threshold point in their development with awakening being the result.  This period has shown us more possibilities and people have been able to shrug off the control of their institutions just enough to begin to evolve in new directions, directs that favor awakening.

I think we need to be less concerned about how others will react or treat us.  We already are made into a kind of outcast by the differences in our experiences moment by moment from the average Joe and Josephina.  I mean, admit it, even as you go through your life undercover as the awakened being on the planet, you also find that this makes you feel so singular and lonely.  Social things for social creatures.  I think that the teachings of Tantra have a lot to explain about bliss.  While tantra is itself not necessarily sexual, the parts of tantra that are do not seek to shy away from confronting issues in our consciousness (well, it is the same with white tantra or black, both head straight-away right into the center of the fire which is how all emotional release work is done in fact).  The lesson is that you never skirt the briar patch, you head right into it and liberate it of whatever hitches that reside within the self.  Free yourself from shame, guilt, and repressed emotion. I know that in my life I have worked to dissolve as much of it as I can.  I have more to go, but as this last block rears its head I am reminded that if I am to be able to hear the voice of my intuition and my inner guidance as clearly as possible, I have to continue to be clearer.  Don’t be tamed, friends.

Torus Field

I’m going to share something with you, something I have not discussed on this blog before. I haven’t shared this because no matter how I would think of telling it, I kept hearing people in my head saying how it was a boast and not paying the heed to it that they ought to. I’m over this and I know that in just writing it, it opens a causal pathway that others can use. It’s nothing fancy, it’s simply awareness. Just knowing about something is enough to bring focus to it as a possibility. This experience involves how I experienced being in multiple locations (and time-lines) at once. What I found most interesting was how I was completely conscious of each location, each vantage point throughout the experience.  I am certain now that I know what the key was to my being able to be aware in the way that I was.  I think that it has important implications for others of you out there who are interested in the outer limits of consciousness (I say this knowing that there may be no limits to consciousness).

Before I do I want to tell you how improbable I once thought this experience was, just months before experiencing it.

Somewhere I read about a meditation practice used in India. It went like this: you hold in consciousness the thoughts or actions of something fairly simple, like a chant or counting of different objects. The object of the exercise was to hold numerous different things in consciousness, paying equal attention to each, thus allowing the mind to process many streams of awareness all at once. Call it a cosmic game of patting your head, rubbing your tummy, hopping on one foot, and whistling a tune all at once. This was thirty years ago so while the exact details of the exercise are a little dusty in my mind, this was the gist of it. As I contemplated this, I thought how impossible such a feat was. I really couldn’t believe such a thing was possible. I also wondered what the point of it was. That is, until I had an experience that came completely out of the blue that showed me that it was possible. Instead of having to practice this for months, maybe years, I was able to do it right out of the chute. What made it so easy is an element of consciousness which I am going to share with you.

Consciousness is not a finite quantity. Consciousness is energy. It also has the ability to turn itself into anything, to be large, to be small. When we project consciousness, you are able to find exact locations based on thought alone. The laws of physics are upended as light years can be traversed instantly.  Through a complex series of lightening fast calculations, consciousness is able to expand itself to any location, enabling you to see the location as though you are there. You are in truth at two places at once; in your body and in the travelled-to location. When we feel others, our consciousness has the capacity to recreate what they feel in instances of empathy as though we are the ones experiencing it. Healers can pinpoint disease or blocks in the body, mind, heart, and more, helping them to release just by using energy. Beyond our conscious awareness, behind this “veil” everyone speaks about is a soul that is able to make endless versions of itself and be in all places at once.  Why?  Because the idea of time is largely that, an idea.  We seem to be experiencing a sequential ordering of events, and it seems perfectly reasonable that we grow up, grow old, and then die.  Caught in the stream of energy that is time, this seems certainly so.  However, in accelerated states of consciousness, time can be experienced as an expansive present.  This enables the old idea of time to be collapsed and awareness of a multidimensional present to emerge.  But just as all-time represents a multidimensional experience, so too is consciousness multidimensional.  It’s just that most people never experience events all at once, or multiple streams of events going on at once and find that they are able to follow all of it perfectly fine.

But we can.

The trick to expanded consciousness is opening up to more energy. There is one experience that people have that while rare, often happens to enough people that they can relate to the experience because it has happened to them.  This experience the phenomenon of simultaneous dreams.  In the dream, there are multiple levels or multiple dreams happening at once.  The dreamer is aware of the levels all at once, and while the information is often processed as one dream following another, the dreamer knows that the dreams were happening all at once, but often have difficulty trying to recreate the effect of what it was like to be in two dreams at once.Outside of dreaming, there are cases where the shift in energy allows for multiple perspectives to exist, either in the same reality or in multiple realities.  Realize, too, that the oversoul is doing this as part of its normal operations, looking after hundreds, perhaps even thousands of lives in any given reality, for example.  As a result, I do think that we have these same abilities or characteristics….we just might have to dig deeper for them or shift awareness in order to realize that they are there.

When you enable this level of energy, consciousness can process more and more information. It’s like upping the voltage and giving a computer more processing power. When you are aware that this is possible, you will begin having events that make it possible to experience precisely this, provided that you remain open to it as a possibility. When you catch on to how to bring in more energy, it is like your awareness suddenly taking on more dimension. It is an experience that must be experienced directly.  Intuition is increased, awareness changes, things that seem impossible happen as if there was nothing to them. Greater levels of energy allow us access  the higher self as a natural consequence of handling more energy (we will see how this theory holds up).  It can often feel as though some hidden hand is controlling or orchestrating things, and then humans set about trying to create a narrative about this hidden hand and what it is that they think it is.  Some folks will say its the “will of the universe”  but my sense has always been that this is an aspect of the higher self, which we, the little self,  hardly ever experience. I think the same thing is done when people say that it is the will of God.  In my experience I have not found a deity that looks or behaves like a person at all.  Its existence is so incredibly large in consciousness that relating to it as though it were a person seems highly improbable.  It isn’t that this force can’t be related to, it can, and incredibly well, its just that in terms of intervention, this being simply stays out of it completely.

The point is that we just are not as aware of the higher realms as we think we are, and when we do we often carry our biases and beliefs into them and interpret what is happening in those terms.  I have found that by divesting of what it is that I think I know, the universe opens up in a fashion that is too amazing to be believed, but has very important implications for us today.

I had an experience when I was 18 where I was conscious and aware of being in four locations or focuses in a scene all at once. I was equally aware of each vantage point while this encounter took place. I was not specially trained. I hadn’t awakened, and I only knew that some yogis develop this sort of awareness to expand the mind. For me the one thing that made this possible was a very high level of energy. I learned that as we learn to handle or manipulate more energy, consciousness can be better understood. Imagine running a factory on 120 voltage when it really runs best on 240 volts. That was my experience. Normally we experience a very low level of experience, but as more energy is brought in, consciousness blooms and is capable of so much more. We are each this.

The way to learning how to handle more energy is simple, you expand your capacity to feel. The Secret to this is you let yourself be open. You allow yourself to be receptive, ready, and aware that all of this is possible. By doing the things that soften you and let’s your body and awareness to become a conduit for more energy, you set up the ideal environment for this type of experience. Breath work might help if you are new to this, and knowing how to breathe can make all the difference. By quieting the mind and being powerfully present, your energy is focused and not bled away. When you look within you conserve the energy of consciousness. When you focus outwardly, energy is blessed outward. This is a very simple principle.

 

The reason why this is important is that it can reveal to you the capacity that you have as a sentient life form here. Before you try splitting awareness, try increasing your energy first. You can feel your chakras opening and being active because you can feel them develop a sense of floating and spinning. This is increased pranic flow. Instead of trying hard, going about it as an allowing is the best way to bid the energy to flow. It may seem nonintuitive, but in not trying you open the path for aspects of the higher self to play through. I know this because I practice it, finding it not by a teacher but through direct practice.

The first step is in knowing it’s possible. I am no different than you. But in knowing, you also know about the multidimensional nature of consciousness. The first step down this path might be a meditation practice, becoming involved in seeking out what this consciousness of yours is all about, and then observing its changes objectively as you travel through this world.  And the way there is often through meditation, but there are practices such as projection of consciousness which can tell you a lot about the nature of consciousness, time, and reality.  Projecting consciousness is not easy though, but it can be done with a great deal of practice. Meditation, while easier, can offer important clues, too.  Practicing a form of meditation I always thought of as inner energy work was one very interesting way for me to activate the chakras and then observe them.  The only problem was that for a long time I lacked a good enough sense of awareness or perspective necessary to really fully understand what it was I was looking at or experiencing.  If I had, I would have not just felt the energy in the innocent way that I did and thought, “My how neat it is that I am feeling this really groovy energy in my body” and went to, “The chakras are activating, turning, and I can feel the energy massing in its core, with numerous blockages there, all having to do with stored trauma…. I have some work to do; I think next time I will begin to send my energy into those center and  try to dissolve a block or two.”

You see, as humans, lacking awareness of these things, we make up stories about them.  Sometimes the stories hit it close, but sometimes the stories are just distortions that do little to help us to relate to material that at the end of the day has no words, has no dimension, and has no real way to truly describe it in physical terms as it relates to the physical world.  And yes, this means it is very difficult to describe this stuff and very often, I don’t even try….but I think that from time to time I do need to try in order to cut through the distortive material. This experience asks of us more than we are used to….but I think we each have the innate capacity to relate to it because it isour birthright to do so.

C6921237-8F89-4F0F-BA98-8D30E7BD52C9

Long before awakening came along for me, I had been seeing energy, called auras, for decades. I had studied energy and how it works in us for some time before awakening came. When awakening came though, there emerged a more complete and perhaps more direct and intense awareness of energy in all of its forms. Instead of just seeing the energy as I had done for years, I was feeling it, inside my own shell of perception. This is a perception that the late Jane Roberts trance personality Seth described 40 years ago as “Inner Vibrational Touch.” * Simply put, the sensory abilities that I had prior to the awakening event caused my inner senses that had already been used prior to be tripled in their strength at the least.

 

Some of my earliest perceptions as a consequence of my awakening was of an aspect of energy bodies better known as the meridian system. I saw these in others as well as myself (I had only seen a kind of fibrous character to the aura in the halo in the years prior to awakening with my ordinary energy sensing but now I was sensing the inner core of energy of all kinds). I didnt know at first that what I was glimpsing were meridians. I was doing this not with every person I saw. I was able to glimpse this through a particularly intimate or close connection that was forged as a facet of many awakenings that are referred to as the Twin Soul phenomenon. These are marked by a feeling as though one is sharing the same space as the other, that two consciousnesses are occupying the same psychic space even though they might be seperated by vast distances (in my case I had never met my “twin” in this life and she lived in another country).

In our encounters, which were less a willed process and one that simply was, I found  that my own inner proclivity to want to explore and discover manifested itself in my usng my newly enhanced third-eye perception to explore the physics of our bond. I wanted to understand why we were joined at the hip, so to speak, and why was it that thousands of others were also reporting the same phenomenon. I think I was able to see these meridian lines because of her and my initial close bonding.  Part of the experience was that the force of the draw was simply much too strong to resist, so instead of resisting, I went into it as deeply as I could in order to find out as much as I could about this experience (this blog is an outgrowth of those earliest of discoveries)

Very recently I realized that this perception of the meridians in the human body has a tie-in with what people describe as the “grid” or patterns in the universe. I was so not getting or even relating to all of this “grid” talk, mostly because the universe isnt a grid. I mean, if you look at it energetically, it isn’t. Instead, at the nano-scale, there are strands connecting everything to everything else in physical space, but this is seen at the subatomic scale mostly. The strands are so many that they wind up creating the appearance of a coherence…a glow rather than individual strands. Yet, this is the fundamental reality underlying this energy which is the necessity for a strand is based on laws related to physics (albeit energetically).

Since our bodies are made of matter and matter is energy, and because our consciousness is made up of aware energy (prana or qi), it makes sense to understand what we are dealing with here. I’m a guy who really loves to know how things work. I love how things work because I really want to know how I, a human, can co-create with the creative energy that pervades the whole universe ( and I know the energy is matter at a different vibration). That is it in a nutshell.

That said, the path to clearer seeing and perceiving is through a clarified self. To see clearly, the mirror must be polished, the glass must be cleared of its stain, the lake must be clarified of all of its muck to not only see into its depths, but to also see out of it. As a consequence, the inner work of clarifying, cleansing, and healing the distortions in the self are critical for a self that itself becomes the clear lense of inner sight (“insight”). The self must be cleansed of the forces that bias consciousness and misdirect attention. It is interesting that the force of awakening itself actually serves the purpose of helping to cleanse the self in this way. Followers, pilgrims, monks, and yogis through the ages have utilized the power of awakening to help cleanse the apparatus of perception so that they might see more clearly. The self, consciousness, becomes the telescope and microscope through which we can examine the world (and this includes the inner senses as well).

Doing this work leads to learning the difference between what I call the ego-compass and the soul-compass, which tends to point us in different directions (with the soul compass always getting us to the right place and cutting through the bullshit even if its the bullshit we have created for ourselves). We often tend to pick up the ego compass because it was such a central part of our thinking for so long, even if it led us into ditch after ditch. This is how we begin to adopt cosmic consciousness or cosmic mind. We learn that this so-called “false self” (boy I dislike that term!) is the same as this false or egoic compass. It is filled with things we desire, but those desires are driven by our distortions carried in our light body/consciousness . A real conundrum. Learning to detect the soulful compass from the selfish one can be a real challenge, but I have found that there are signs that help to identify it (both actually).

In the realm of energy, my eyes really were opened to a level I hadn’t quite experienced with seeing energy for years before awakening came. One of the first things that I found while existing in a state of union most of the time with a “soul twin” or “twin flame” experience was that I found that I would routinely use my inner sight to see her energy body. In truth, I coukd not always tell which was hers and which was mine sometimes.  I found that my consciousness would get very small and be able to see these strands of energy that moved through her whole body that looked like these white stands of light that looked a lot like nerve fibers. In fact, when I moved my energetic hand through them, I could feel them give and pull against my hand. They were kind of rubbery to my inner sense for energy. I also found that when I combed my hands through her field, it did two things. First, she would go into states of ecstacy, which she would complain of as being too much to take, to be able to feel, and still stay focused in the physical. Second, she would also go into opposite states that corresponded to what happens when we resist letting go of blocked energy. We have emotional meltdowns. I was there, combing her energy with my energy because I could feel how the interaction was so healing, but that it also was not the heady healing she was ready for. At this time, these meridians looked like white fibers. I was able to do this combing, a healing kind of massage, I guess, that I layer found was much like Reiki for how it was higher order energy and because I could do this from many thousands of miles away while it felt to her as though I was nearby The picture above is a poor representation of the strands I later saw, and how in earlier perceptions they were like veins or nerves, albeit energetic in nature and seeable only through the third eye. They were everywhere, down to the smallest level (cellular and subatomic) and up to the largest size along the torso.

If we fast forward a decade, we get to a point in my healing process where I have released a significant amount of material and I am finding that things are looking more and more different to me. What things, you might ask? Well, a lot of things really changed. For example, the release of so much emotionaly distorted stuff led me to understanding peoples’ behavior in relation to me in a much different way, which is that so much of what people think they see is the result of the distortions present in awareness. We assume so many things about how we think the world is or why people do what they do when in all truth we are judging based on each of our own inner rule book, which has nothing at all to do with what might actually be happening to the people in the world that we are seeing and judging (unknowingly). Our own inner distortions keep us from seeing things as the are, you see. That said, I am not suggesting that I am completely clear. I still have my work that I am actively engaged in, but increasingly, as I go from energetic event to energetic event, from one clearing to the next, my inner sensing has become much changed.

I knew that these white strands I had seen corresponded to the meridians in Chinese medicine. I saw that where each strand crossed another strand, ormwhere a branch moved into a central a channel, that there was always this little…chakra there, a vortex of energy. As each strand joined to still larger strands, these points got bigger and bigger, these chakras. Long before I knew anything about the fact that there are hundreds of thousands of chakras in the body, I was seeing many many of these points in the bodies of people who let me see them. I looked at my own, too, and it was when I was able to do this during a body work session with my healer that I was able to see something that I had never seen described in any of the literature….anywhere. Looking down at my body, I was able to see how each accupuncture/pressure point was actually made up of many other points all inside this one point. I saw in each strand also that the strand was not solid or monolithic but was instead made up of thousands and thousands of strands all within the same meridian itself. It was not unlike how it might look to see a bundle of fiberoptic fibers upclose. I could see some fibers within the meridian that were colored more darkly and I could trace that fiber back to a chakra point or meridian point down, say, into the leg or near the back, even though I was looking at the meridian going up the torso before it moved into the heart chakra, for example. I was able to see that everything in this meridian system was related to everything else and that all ofmit was delicately, masterfully, created as a portal for bringing in energy from the universe and spirit into our here and now. This energy could be for healing, for creating new technologies, for any number of things.

What came next was the realization that what was in us was also in the universe. Now, I knew that the torus field exists around every atom, every living being, and is also surrounding the earth, the sun, and also the galaxy, but so too is this thing everyone has been calling “the grid.” I just wasn’t making the connection! Tiny little torus’s that make up ever subatomic particle on up to living things, planets, suns, the whole shooting match. Making this connection helps to explain why it is that we feel everything as sentient and alive (because this living energy that runs through everything sentient and nonsentient is alive even if its in nonsentient matter….(as if THAT now makes ANY sense whatsoever!) It also shows that just as we have blocked energy in our bodies there can be blocked energy placed in the physical system, too. This manifests as troubled areas in the world where mostly humans fought or hurt each other and got energy stuck in the area where things took place. This can be released in the same way that we release stuck energy in ourselves.

I noticed that when I saw these energy points or chakras with all of these other smaller points from other strands or meridians within them, I realized that this was probably what was behind the depiction of chakras as many-petalled flowers. What I saw was a disc with many other discs within it. Each smaller disc was a strand from another chakra in the body, which means that our energy body is this interconnected, redundant system that takes the idea of connectivity to a whole new level. To say we were made for connection is an understatement! I had not read anywhere that a petal on one chakra corresponded to another chakra…but here I was seeing how these little ringlets or sphericules surrounding a pressure point were relating to a point in another chakra. Have you ever touched a point on your body and felt as though it was also touching another point further away?…as if you were touching two points, one physically and one energetically? It is very much like this in a way.

Now hang on: I want to stress something and I hope you can get what I am going to say. Inhave enough observations in thenworld of energy to know that since energy rides between one dimension and others, trying to get it to fall into neatly defined catagories is probably foolhearty to do. I have noticed that my perception will sometimes offer me something that is more like a hallucination, or an inner sensory creation in order to provide me information about the truth of what is going on. Many people who see auras describe them in a fairly uniform way despite the fact that the eyes cannot really see into that wavelength of energy! So what gives? The deeper truth here is that seeing auras is not a physical sense…at all. It is an inner sense. It appears that one is actually seeing this halo around the body when in fact, this is all just a seeming. Wait!! What?!! It is now widely known that when the brain is confronted with information that does not come from the five senses, it will plug that data into a sensory slot that makes the most sense to it at the time. Physiological psycholgists are familiar with this spectrum of behavior and itnis now well documented tha this does indeed happen. In  the case of seeing auras, the brain is aware of all of this information and it puts it into a visual center to be processed, even though it is not coming in from physical senses (this is how psychics can report hearing voices-claireaudience-as a means if speaking with thise who are no longer physical, for example). It seems that we are wired or designed for psychic senses.

As long as we carry powerful enough distortions in our fields of awareness, we will mistake our distortions for the truth. This is the risk we take. By learning how to FEEL fully and more deeply, we can begin to feel the deep innermost compass in our soul that will not err in directing each of us to the right place for our development and fulfillment.

I have also noticed that we can’t really examine these points beyond a third eye awareness and make much sense of them. Yes, we can objectively see where a strand or a chakra is blocked, but the path to unblocking is one that is not done objectively, but rather, subjectively. Subjectively how? By feeling, of course! By letting that rip-tide of near-orgasmic energy that is the bliss field pouring through us illuminate the blocks and push them on up and out, effectively transmuting the blocked energy into bliss energy! This is irrational. Forget your need or ability to control-like Shakti this is wild and free. This is through feeling that we do this. When you let this bliss flow and then shine that bliss into the darker corners of yourself or another, it begins to break up the blocked energy right away….unless the other resists it. And sometimes when we turn it on ourselves, we can actually feel the resistance building in us. But what I have found is that this is not cause for upset with ourselves, just see the resistance as a sign that points directly to where your next challenge in healing lies. A problem thus becomes your teacher….not just a problem to be solved or set aside (or worse; hidden). Some people have an amazing ability to hold onto old junk and keep from letting go their grip on the familiar in favor of the new human experiencing the cosmic (I count myself as one of these people with an extraordinary grip!). Anyway…

So we can use the rational mind to see things as they are if we can clear the third eye chakra. But seeing is not feeling, so be ready to feel the issue full-on with your whole energy body. But to feel clearly, I have found we each need to be clear….and to be clear, we really need to be honest with ourselves. I have seen how others have fooled themselves into thinking they were further along then they really were because of how their own work was used to fuel their often brutalized ego, which soaked up all the love and turned it into more of itself (which was ego-energy).

If you want a quick way out of the path of progress, just feed that ego. It will tell you all kinds of things, some completely true, but some remarkably distorted, about how things are. This is in large part because the small individual ego onlynhas access to your own localized belief systems that you have adopted in this life, it does not access as a matter of course the information from the superself or cosmic consciousness (which is where an even more expansive sense or superego resides that is involved in touching the others in cosmic encounters beyond ordinary consciousness) This is why it is so useful to be able to step outside of ego and into that silence of the self where the eternal stream of pranic bliss can be met and felt. It isn’t that ego is bad or evil. It is in fact completely necessary as a filtering device for phenomenon (trust me, feeling your neighbor stubbing her toe isn’t always the great experience-we are individual for a reason). Without ego, you would be completely overtaken with the flood of information flowing through the whole of the universe, which happens to also be flowing through you as well (we just feel it as “flow” instead of the gazillions of feelings thoughts and bitsmof information from everyone and everything else in the universe). Haven’t you ever felt that stream of energy-as-information? Have you sensed how it would be just too much for any one person to be completely aware of? Have you felt that overwhelming immensity, knowing that you were standing off to the side, like a person looking at an immense vista rather than merging with its totality? Well, that is what we do each moment of the day. It is also why the energy is orgasmic…it carries so much creative energy, which is naturally stimulating in nature. And by orgasmic, I mean energetically orgasmic, what the Buddhas have all known as bliss. To handle it all, and to experience individuality, we have the marvelous filter called ego. But we also have to be careful that it doesnt get inflated, right? By learning to side-step ego, cosmic consciousness can be experienced without it getting in the way. Some want to call this “ego death” which, having gone through what this is supposed to represent, I can say that ego does not die…only our dependence on its filling a central role in our lives dies or is refigured. No death, only life. More and more life!

I observed that the meridian system connects everything in the body, along energetic lines, together. This means that I saw how these lines exist all the way down at the subatomic level. This is what I mean when I said in the beginning that I explored the energy body of the one I was connected to at the early stages of my awakening. AsmI delved into the energy field, I saw that these lines went to finer and finer lines until the lines went into subatomic particles. Its really wuite a fascinating thing to see. At the level of the atom, these lines look different than the main meridians do. At the level of the meridians that travel along the trunk of the body, there are so many strands existing there from all the other things that the energy is connecting, that it looks like an artery when it is in truth made up of millions of individual strands, much like fiber optic cables that are bundled together. Further, the way a strand or “artery” feels in the torso is different from how it feels at the subatomic level. At the subatomic level,the force is very weak compared to the force of the overall auric field. Still, though, there is nothing quite so joyous as feeling what the “subatomics” are feeling every moment of the day. The capacity might be small at the subatomic level, but the force it connects to is very strong (the universe). When I have seen the strands at the subatomic level, they are much like spiders webs, except that the strand is made up of extremely thin strands of white light that has this slight glow around them. The glow from a distance in perception can be read as the strand itself, making it seem bigger than it is. Look closely and I saw that the energy was both field and particle all at once. It was hard for me to divide this perception…it was simply…both all at once. It had magnetic properties that made it possible to disrupt the flow while still maintaining the overall structure of the energetic field. If you cut off a finger, the field is not cut off, it reforms itself like the body does in order to heal.

Whether or not our own chakras corresponds to chakras that are in the physical system, like the earth or cosmos, I can’t say. I haven’t looked into it like this yet, but I am interested in doing so. I am also very interested in anyone who might have some observations that they have made along these lines. I do know that I have felt the energetic lines of the earth every day, and I have felt the energy of the sun and how it interacts with earth. I just haven’t sensed into these bodies or fields for the presence of these transit lines or points where they cross (aka chakras). Maybe in the universe it is on a different scale than our own bodies. I’m not sure that our chakra system is a carbon copy of anything except the human being. Maybe the transit system for energy is what is common, tying everything together regardless of how things connect together. I would love to hear your thoughts because you know how meditating on and noodling these things are…

 

* While in trance, Jane Roberts personality Seth described a series of inner senses which readers ofmthe Seth books could discover and use for better understanding the world and their place in it. Inner Vibrational Touch was described as picking up where empathy leaves off. Empathy suggests an ability to reflect on ones own past experience and infer what someone must be feeling. With IVT, it is possible to feel as the other person is feeling in that moment. One is able to tune into the specific vibration of emotion and replicate it within ones own perception. It thus feels as though one is experiencing directly what the other person is feeling (this is also consistent with the majority of people and their experiences with awakening).

For perspective, the Egyptian culture brought us the description and detailing of hundreds of inner senses, of which IVT is but one of many.

You can’t see a chakra, so how is it that I am using a term like ‘anatomy’ to talk about it?

Invisible to the naked eye, the chakras are beyond visible perception but have been studied for thousands of years. Chakra is a word from Sanskrit that means ‘wheel.’ While the concept of the chakra never entered into the lexicon of Chinese Medicine, the Chinese mapped the lines connecting the chakra system with such precision that their maps are used to locate and identify the gateways or points in the subtle body system that can be pressed or “needled” by acupuncturists to help release the blocked energy the Chinese call qi and the Hindus call prana. The specifics differ due to cultural inclinations, but they are both describing the same thing, as well as different parts of the same system of energy.

The anatomy of the chakras has been done by those sensitive enough or those most willing to tune into them using energetic awareness and the third eye. For as ancient as the knowledge is, there is still more to discover.

In 2009, I was visited by an angelic being who placed his hand into my heart chakra in what I describe as a form of “surgery” where he pulled out a “skin” or body of old psychic material that I had in my energy body. As this was happening, my system went from feeling like it was running on a 220 volt system to a 10,000 volt system. Everything lit up, my entire being was suffused by a love of God so incredible I had no idea such an experience was even possible. During what only took a moment, a series of extremely rapid communications took place. I realized that I had entered into a superstate. I am telling you this to point out that whenever I have had these transcendent experiences (I actually don’t go beyond—I feel that I am enhanced or consciousness has accelerated), my perception and awareness also is enhanced right along with everything else. 

One thing that I noticed was that I was focused on my heart chakra and saw what appeared to be a beautiful thousand-petaled flower form that emerged into my mind’s eye awareness. As I watched this flower that I knew was my heart chakra, I noticed that behind the flower was yet another flower. As I looked at this, information streamed into me letting me know that the flower in the front of my chest coincided with yang or positive “male” energy in consciousness while the other flower or chakra corresponded to the yin or “feminine” qualities in consciousness. I use quotes because this has nothing to do with gender or sexual orientation, just a quality in all of us. It is also what connects us to the divine, to superconsciousness which is native to all of us and not separate from any of us. It is the yin/yang and the father/holy ghost. These two build the full compliment of superconsciousness also known as cosmic mind, the Christ, and others (described in every major culture).

This second flower was guarded, protected, really, or so it seemed, by its masculine counterpart.I thought how lovely that was, but I also thought that this idea seemed new. I had never heard of two heart chakras before (and I’ve studied energy for years), so what was going on?

This experience led me to inquire more deeply within to see if I could find out more.

What I came up with from my inner study was a little hard to grasp on the surface but easy to grasp in totality. So here goes…

Since the chakras correspond to the physical body, they have the appearance of a given location and form, with two complimentary channels of energy moving through and aiding in the activation or flow(yin and yang). At the same time, the chakras channel this energy called prana which appears to not be tied down to a regular 3-dimensional structure only. As a result their placement in the body, while consistent, also has a few odd inconsistencies attached. For one; it exhibits nonlocality. This means that a discrete particle of energy can be anywhere, or, theoretically, everywhere simply because while it is here in space/time, it also exists outside of it. This correlates with some theories in quantum mechanics which give physicists a hard time sometimes.

In the body there are Ida and Pengali channels in the nadi or meridian system. The Ida carries what is generally thought of as a negative charge with the Pengali carrying what we refer to as a positive charge. These run in parallel along the spine. While this is so, the feminine aspect of the chakra appears to be situated towards the back side of the body. It seems as though this might be an odd bit of “spooky action” at a distance.Perhaps when the energy from the Ida and Pengali enter the chakra it gets “turned” somehow so that this orientation is perceived as being front to back.This is the forward edge of energetic understanding since no one that I am aware of has delved into this issue. It’s curious and I’d like to understand it better because I think it could reveal a hitherto unknown characteristic of the energy that might provide us with a new wrinkle in also understanding ourselves and the super consciousness that “invented” all of this.

Now as I say this, I know that it could also be that nothing is as simple as it seems. It could be that we only feel this orientation due to how our own personalities or Psyche’s are structured. It is possible that I feel the receptive energy more in the core of my being because I am a heterosexual male whose sexual alignment is masculine/hetero while I have a non-dominant series of feminine traits that are more subtle in their expression. Would a woman feel an inner masculine that resides within, situated so because those traits are not dominant? Or is this just how I am oriented? I do note however that the Seraphim when telling me his name showed me his nature in a visual image. It consisted of a tall masculine man with a softer interior. Hard on the outside, soft on the inside. This is very much like how I feel myself to be…so I do wonder how others experience this….

I also found that what I was feeling was that one side of the chakra turned one way based on its polarity while the other side, to the back, turned a different way. That is, the movement felt like it was opposite or complimentary. This created the feeling of two lobes of the same object turning together but using or being affected by different “ends” of the energy. To be more accurate, there was a feeling of this being a torus form where energy would flow out and then back into the center which is the “zero point” where all energy reached no-charge. Positive would turn into negative and negative would turn into positive. The torus itself maintained a magnetic alignment that gave it a sense of solidity, form, and consistency…much like how the physical body maintains consistency even though it is made entirely of energy (E=MC2)

I was pleased to find that the drawing I made back in the day to illustrate this is a nearly perfect representation of images Barbara Brennan has had illustrated in her books about human energy and healing. 

Don’t take the drawing as literal, however. It leaves a lot of subtle material out and is meant to present the idea. It is highly simplified in order to make some principles clearer. The image is below.

And for that matter, this image of a torus viewed on its side (think of a donut shape) could be used (below).

For those interested in learning by doing, or helping to expand our knowledge base, I encourage you to use the minds eye to see the energy body. I know that what I have done is the same perception used by the Chinese that led to their meridian maps or the Indian system of the basis or energy channels.

Once when I was in a deep restful state with my masseuse and energy worker, I found my third eye activated and I was able to look at my body as though I was looking down from my head to my feet. I saw how along one meridian there were a cluster of other points, each coinciding with a chakra in another part of the body. What’s more, my masseuse was about to press her finger on that meridian line and as she felt for it, I saw one of the dots around the meridian was dark. I told her what I was seeing. The point was so small, her finger covered the cluster of points but the very center of her pressure in her finger was about an 8th of an inch off. So I told her which direction to press into, and as she pressed, she also moved her finger over the fascia of my skin just enough to reach the one point exactly. She pressed and I howled in pain; she was worried and I said to keep pressing harder. And boom, just like that, two memories popped into clear view that involved my trauma with the ocean-once as a child in my life now and as a Polynesian. While the details aren’t important here, the fact that I saw something that had never been described before in any manual on energy medicine sure seemed very important. Instead of viewing the energy system front-end, I was looking “down the pipe” (top to bottom) as I call it and saw this cluster of dots that when pushed, cleared energy from another chakra in another part of the body. The pressure point was in my shoulder but the center that released was down in the hip or root chakra region. When I guided her finger to the exact point, it was like releasing a long forgotten memory and the emotions that went along with it.Interstingly this cluster of points looked just like a flower with dots for petals. Each petal, a channel for bliss-filled energy. The implication in my vision was that each chakra is energetically present at every other point. Let that sink in for a while.

You might think if you see a chakra as a flower that this is its literal structure. It isn’t. A chakra might feel like a flower but look like a cluster of meridian lines. But the chakra feels like a beautiful unfolding flower. It’s poetry, you see, a way to tell the truth when faced with something in our world through colorful interpretations based on the association’s we have with objects in the world. The image tells the truth through dreaming.

Dream imagery achieves the same thing; it conveys how we feel about something because our response and our experience are in no way separated from the phenomenon. When someone misperceives me,f or example,  I feel it as a tightening, almost always, because the channels of energy are being affected in that person and I can feel what they feel when I tune them in.  But it is they who are shutting down their energy, not me. I can still feel it. It might seem real to them, but is not real beyond what the energy is doing (constricting) and I know that it is in this constriction that people pull into their own limited story lines about what they think is true instead of what is. So they dream a story and believe it to be real. I do not dream, but feel the restriction. So likewise I saw the chakras as like a peony with endless petals. Beautiful and poetic, with the male “covering” or protecting the female. But this was just an image that I saw that sought to interpret what I was able to grasp in the moment. It was beyond beautiful… it was cosmic… so a peony with its riot of petals opening helped to convey this opening that happened in me with the angelic seraphim. 

To that end, it is an image that describes a spatial and non-spatial phenomenon all at once (something both physical and nonphysical all at once).

What am I saying? I am saying that truths use images to express themselves, but we are the ones choosing the images. The clearer you are inside, the clearer the transmission is. Don’t take images in the mind as the literal truth because there is more for all of us to learn and know (myself included). I’m just showing you whatI have seen, hoping others will get curious and want to do their own inquiry to help move all of us along in our understanding. 

A large part of what I write about on this blog has been about how to release stored emotional energy that is in the body. I do this because of its connection to our ability to know the deeper self. It also is work that can make an awakening experience far less chaotic or difficult. Some people who either awaken without preparation or do so spontaneously can wind up in a state of psychosis. While I speak and write glowingly of awakening, it is our own backlog of stored trauma that causes great difficulty with so much prana (which is kundalini) now animating the good and the not-so-good within.

There are numerous ways to assist in releasing stored emotional trauma. One of the ways that I have been exploring this has been a direct result of earlier releases which have made an awareness of how fundamental the hips are in aiding in clearing trauma that is stored there. This is where the root chakra rests and it is also home to a set of muscles yogis have dubbed “the seat of the soul.” These muscles make up what is called the psoas (pronounced “so-as”). These muscles are where the most basic and earliest traumas in life are stored. Without proper care, this muscle group can not only store trauma, but can also lead to a number of lower back problems that include a weak, unnatural, or shuffling gate,  and body pain that radiates down to the knees and up though the hips into the lower lumbar regions. Knowing how to stretch and tone the psoas will leave you feeling as though you have a new lease on life. While Voltaire claimed the pineal the “seat of the soul,” the psoas is in my experience the real honest to goodness seat of the soul. This region will impact your self worth, feelings of abundance, and creative fire, to name a few.

The psoas is so basic and foundational a muscle group that it governs our most basic of emotions and feelings in our bodies. When this muscle group is stressed our whole being feels out of place. When this muscle group is cleared stretched and toned you can go from feeling trapped and oppressed and full of pain to feeling light and like a child again.

I’m going to describe one of the most effective ways to begin to release stress from the psoas. There are also some stretches that are used in yoga that have been used for centuries for stretching and toning the psoas.

To understand how foundational this muscle group is,  you need only look at the illustration below to see that the psoas is the bridge between the legs and torso. Like back muscles, if this muscle group doesn’t get  enough stretching and toning, it can develop soreness and rigidity that telegraph’s that pain and rigidity throughout the body making you feel “yuck.”

Trauma Release Exercise (TRE) is one of the most effective ways to release stored trauma in this muscle group. A quick look on youtube will reveal countless videos that reveal how this method works, and I also have a detailed post that delves into this extremely simple yet effective method (search on my blog “TRE”).  It works by causing the body to go into tremors which help release stored emotional energy that is in the body (who knew, right?).  Humans are the ONLY mammal that does not have the instinct to shake after a traumatic event has occurred. In fact, more often than not humans will freeze when trauma is experienced. This is how trauma is stored in the body, and it will remain there as an energetic and physiological imprint until it is removed or released. By inducing shaking in this important muscle, everyone can utilize the therapeutic effect of shaking as an effective means for releasing trauma from earliest life.

This method, which I have detailed before (search “trauma release” in the search section) involves lying with your back on the floor and your behind lifted up about six inches off the floor, doing so until the leg muscles become fatigued so they begin to shake. This shaking begins to help release stored emotion. You might find that a lot of hard emotions come up, and it’s important to not hold these emotions back. You need to let them flow without “grabbing” for them. If you adopt this approach, you will find success with this method.These emotions are in the past and there is nothing to fear.

In the illustration above, a large pillow can be used to rest as needed. The lifted position of the pelvis is very helpful in getting the stress to move deep into the hips.

Next, stretching the psoas is very helpful. In fact, if you do it regularly you will feel as though you have a new lease on life. Believe it or not, this very simple act can lead to releasing karma. The one way we release karma is by forgiving ourselves (not others, although this is indeed helpful and an important prelude to self forgiveness when it comes). Feeling the weight of past “debts” bearing on you is not how karma is ever released. Once you shift how you feel deep down, it is easier to reach into the light that is the new life that comes through this work. It might sound unlikely that such a simple thing as stretching can shift and evaporate karma, but it is in fact an important run-up to getting into the right space where these debts can go forever.  It always involves a deep recognition of forgiveness.  No God or outside agency can do this for you; it is an inside job.  Winks.

auraspa.net

This stretch, shown above, is very helpful. Start off slow and don’t stretch beyond your comfort zone. Over time, you will loosen the psoas more and more.
If this stretch is uncomfortable  at first, you can lie flat on the edge of a table or bed and let each leg dangle over the edge, allowing you leg to flex at the hip. This is a little lower impact than a full stretch. You can detect imbalances in your energy field by way of tightness, muscle pain, pressure, as well as issues with balance while performing this stretch.  As I have gotten into using this stretch I have found that I am increasingly more off balance, which might not seem correct at first.  The nature of releasing blocks is that as the block begins to let go (this can be of short duration while stretching or it could occupy weeks or months of time as you work this block out), unsteadiness can often be a symptom of your becoming increasingly aware and present with the block.  This is not a bad thing!  It is a wonderful sign that your body is beginning to “speak” to you to let you now that something big is up. It is also possible to feel a range of sensations from a liquid-like feeling of motion in the body surrounding the block, heat, cold, electrical shocks, and waves of emotion.  Don’t let a strong wave of emotion stop you; this is where the best work is actually being done!

Next, lying flat on your back, bring each leg in turn up to your chest, which will also stretch the “glute” muscle group in the behind. This will also stretch the psoas where it ties into the lower back, an important place for releasing stored stress. Take it slow. Hold this for many minutes. Begin holding one minute and slowly extend it into the three to four minute range. In time, you will be able to naturally stretch into these deep positions naturally. Go slow; this is not a race and your muscles groups, if they have blocks in them, may also be very tight, so you will need to move slowly but persistently over time to help loosen things up.  This will help release body armoring (also called emotional armoring) when you bring thought, feeling, and body together as one in these movements. In fact, as I do these exercises, I will often begin getting intense sensations related to the psoas that in the past might have made me wonder if I should continue, but don’t let feeling emotionally rough stop you; this is a sign that the healing is happening.  Continue with it until it is stretched, massaged, and released. Wait for it; it will come, simple as sunshine.

One final note: stored energy isn’t just in muscle. It is also in the interface between tendon and muscle. By holding a stretch long enough, you give the time needed for the stress to release in the tendons. During a therapy session recently, I had a body worker releasing stress in my elbow, something that had developed as a result of over stressing it in my work. By pressing down and stretching the tendon in a hold, I was able to feel the tension/stress release which felt like water pressure leaving a tube. Once this happened, the tension bound in the tendon was gone for good.

I found that the tension went deeper into the tendon where it connects to the bone. Having learned the technique for release, I pressed deeper and closer to the bone. Once clear, the memory of the trauma was released. While the stress in my elbow and forearm wasn’t emotional stress, the body responds to it the same way. When stretching, let yourself stretch deeper as you go, gently but persistently. You do not want to create tears. Slow and gentle is better than being overly aggressive.

So there you have it: practice this and you will find immediate relief from stored emotion in the hips.

%d bloggers like this: