Archives for category: Chi
Copyright, Parker Stafford

I was given weed recently as a result of my describing what took place this Summer where weed had made me more psychic, something I wrote about here at WTI.

Alone finally last night after the holiday goings-on, I decided to get ready for bed and go through a meditation after using the weed I had been given.

I used a very small amount, about a pinch, about 3/4 the size of a pea (if that). This amounted to two regular puffs and one fraction of a third. This was a very low dose, although the version I used was described as being a strong hybrid version. I put on my headphones, pulled up a Monroe Institute Hemisync program from the Gateway Experience, and listened with headphones. This particular audio helps to induce deep Theta states, and while there are directions for relaxation and breathing, most of it is designed for your own inner work. The audio lasts about 45 minutes, just enough to get you there.

Everything happened very quickly. Before the narrator/guide began his first comments, I already felt a presence of a male who was speaking to me in this bright excited voice who seemed to be positioned above me who extended his hand saying, “Take my hand and I’ll show you all the places you can go!” At this point I was already dissociated from my body and traveling through what looked to be outer space. I remember having an experience like this before many decades ago where I moved out of my body and began seeing a starry sky and feeling that the stars were actually consciousness. The sensation at the time was overwhelming and it put an end to the projection because of the state of overwhelm I invariably would fall into that kept me from further projecting. This time, I thought about this and as I saw all these stars, I didn’t feel overwhelm but instead felt a stirring warmth in my core where there was only love. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, I acknowledged this love as the next step in my evolution and the evolution of everyone on the planet.

I was interupted by the narrator of the audio a number of times as he made suggestions for how to breathe and relax. I was there in seconds, I was ready instantly and kept having my meditation interrupted by this voice. It didn’t trip me up completely though, it was more that I paused my meditation and waited for the voice to complete what it had to say since it pulled me out of the “broad mind” state as I felt pulled into a more linear language-based state (rational left brain). I’ll have to work more on that in the future. I found myself back at my body after expanding outward through both space and dimension, which all took place very quickly.

I noticed during this whole experience that my third eye had become very active. This time, though, I could feel the third eye pressure at the bridge of my nose. My third eye is now a vertical band that goes from my nose all the way up to my hairline. When it activates, it is usually felt as a large dot on my forehead with a sense of energy and even something that feels akin to tightness of a sort. This tightness isn’t inhibiting in any way, it signals that my third eye is activating in a strong way. It is more that this tightness is the result of these bands of energy that flow around it and out of it. When this happens, it is a sign that I can begin to see clearly beyond the physical if I focus my mind correctly with the third eye center. The two work together in bringing information through. I was aware of information streaming into different parts of my brain which would get routed to the third eye as the lens used to see into the realities that these intuitions represented. Likewise, I was aware that the third eye could see into the mind to pick these things up. It was a fluid dynamic system where informatiin flowed both ways.

As I thought about this, the third eye energy shifted up into its usual place which was mid-brow up to the edge of my hairline. The whole area constitutes the third eye for me, which is akin to a long extended flame of awareness and sensation. The Hindu seers who paint the tilak on their foreheads are using an image of how I experience the third eye. Two vertical lines with a cental line in the center all corresponding to the Ida, Pengali, and Shushumna nadi. The Ida and Pengali merge in union and balance in the Shushuma, the place of boundless bliss. Below is a photo of the tilak as it is worn by mendicate monks. There are variations of the tilak, so the one shown below is just one of a handful of versions used.

I was also met by a small presence that I can only describe as dwarfish that spoke and moved excitedly as it began showing me the energy lines in my legs. I had gone from standing on a beach to being up in the hills in a tropical location atop a flat-topped roof of someone’s house, which was where this being began pointing out the energy lines in my legs.

I was in this kind of environment because the hemisync audio uses ocean waves as part of its audio. I naturally found myself standing on a beach, and later moved from the beach uphill into the mountains above where I landed on a slightly sloping rooftop. The being was showing me where the energy lines crossed in my legs when the narrator broke in and it made it hard to continue. I will see about going back to this in another meditation. I knew or could feel how others had mapped the energy body in not too different a way in the past in meditations much like this one, and I thought how easy it was, not the arduous task as I had originally had thought it was.

I was keen to get into the leg chakras because I could feel how there was some blocked energy that resided at the junction of the torso and the legs. It was curious how this energy trailed off behind me, right around my behind and extending out like coat-tails behind me. This awareness has always been one of the great gifts conferred by awakening, and the awareness itself has been enough to dissolve countless blocks in my field. At one time many years ago this awareness would make me feel defeated by the sheer volume of material present to still clear. Now, though, it existed more as a remnant, a trailing bit of material near my lower back.

What is worth mentioning is the back trouble I have been having since November. The week of Thanksgiving was where it came to a head after driving to see family. It was so bad I couldn’t move from a sitting to a standing position without the use of a broom handle which I used for about a week to get up from my couch. Luckily, I somehow managed to keep working even though all I wanted to do was to lie flat on the floor. I have been slowly rehabilitating my back muscles so I can move more freely. What would have taken weeks if adjystments by a chiropractor I was able to do on my own and now the sore muscles are in a much better place with slow and gentle stretches. It was I think not a coincidence that I was having this tightness along with the enhanced awareness of the stuck energy near my bottom in this meditation.

I soon decided to drift off to sleep after this took place. I revisited the idea of telepathy before going to sleep but every person who I put my mind to seemed much too vivid and in a tangle for me to even try another experiment along these lines. I did however find a part of my mind aware of one person who I kept feeling like I was communicating with during the meditation, like a quick check-in contacted me and there was an important message waiting for me from tat person when I checked messages this morning.

I say this only as a reminder about the things we can explore, learn, and discover. We are all inheritors of a noble light that is supportive and loving. We go and experience things that are part of our present “set and setting” and experiences are part and parcel of where we are at any moment in time.

I will note that up until this summer, I have only ever used natural methods for reaching accelerated states of being and awareness. I have also been an advocate for this approach for many decades (using it myself exclusively) since my early twenties—in the late 1980’s. My experience this past summer made me rethink this approach. After being able to reach these ecstatic states naturally, I have considered what some substances might do to help further expand both awareness and experience. While I have no interest in being a heavy user, I am considering this as one wrinkle among many in this entire process.

If weed helps me to hone in on the remnants if blocked energy, then I will consider future meditations using very small amounts to assist in sharpening that awareness. I don’t sense that weed opened my third eye, that initiation took place in a meditation in late 2006. Rather, my intent to do this meditatiin was set on “finding out what I might see ir discover” with my third eye dutifully responding to that intent and also aided by the much more fluid state I found myself in as the weed began to take affect.

The goal for me is to learn how to emulate these states without outside substances. I will mention though that even the food that we eat can have a significant effect on our physiology not unlike weed has done. I have found states of bliss after eating cantaloupe and other melons because it served to modify how my body responded to the energy of the awakened state. Just being well hydrated can change how I feel. Taking vitamin D has had dramatic effects on how I experience bliss, for example. So weed? It may well be one of many plant helpers that I can use to help open up my cognition and awareness to valid physical and nonphysical states, not as a distorter of experience, but as a liberator from an inhibited state to one that is not as inhibited.

I hope you are getting a break and have enjoyed the holidays. If you don’t hear back from me, happy new year!

I am a guy who is fascinated by how things work. Most of all, I have had a long-term interest and study of consciousness, brain/body connection since I was an adolescent. Once awakening took hold, I felt like I was gifted with insight into the potentials we have as human beings which the process of awakening conferred. While I knew little about the phenomenon before this happened, the returning mind we are gifted with in awakening gave me what I thought were important insights which very often wound up being supported by recent discoveries in neuroanatomy, physiology, and physics. Sounds like something someone who has no idea would say. But hang on..

One of the common sayings or thoughts centered around kundalini is that it is a sexual energy. Not wanting to ever dismiss things out of hand, I have rolled this around in my present experience for years now, and often with changes on how I think I relate to that energy. I have thrashed through this before in previous posts where I thought I had it figured out. Understanding, along with awareness can evolve.

I feel lucky to have a “lab” (my consciousness) where I can go in and run experiments whenever I need or want to. I can ask questions, and sometimes I get answers. I don’t always get it right, though, because as has been the case since day one, my awareness and knowledge keep changing.

To summarize my past writing I would say it goes like this: “It’s an energy alright, and while it may feel sexual, it is much more than that. I’d say it is a creative energy and as a result, anything that involves the creative tends to shoot the energy to the moon. Sex is creative since it makes babies and it can serve as a deep linkage point for people in relationship. But is it primarily a sexual energy as some seem to assert that it is? I don’t think so.” I just saved you many posts and years worth of time searching my blog.

One interesting outcome of a recent meditation that I wrote about related to my relationship to abundance, seems to have cleared a path for relating to kundalini differently than before. To be clear, I had known that this energy kicks off very strong sexual energy, but after the meditation and release work something appears to have come into view more clearly than ever before. Let me see if I can explain it! (It’s really simple)

Instead of prana or chi (qi) being the force that brings bliss (orgasmic sometimes), it is instead a new “arrangement” whereby the body is experiencing a higher than normal level of electrical activity. How this actually happens isn’t completely clear, although we do have very good observations written about by many who experienced it directly over hundreds of years. It seems the simplest explanation for prana and chi is the way consciousness helps to shift how the electrical flow moves through the body. Until awakening (kundalini specifically), how the body handles its electrical energy is limited. I don’t think prana or chi is supernatural, but is instead natural and can be understood naturally. Our electrical production is what plugs us into the universe, which, I will point out, is energetic. Most of us are plugged into our world and don’t even know it. This is a huge story, with mindblowing implications for those who are awake and aware of this energy. I will add that the way you become aware of this isn’t through the rational mind but through the feeling or intuitive mind. But I digress..

In both the Indian and Chinese models, this energy runs through nerve-like channels that aren’t actually physical but are more like very consistent circuits that remain in place with every person (such that it can be mapped either as the naddi in the Indian system or meridian in the Chinese). These are energy channels that currently have not been studied to any significant degree by Western science that I am aware of. In the East, it’s a different story. When you look at an accupuncture chart you can get an idea as to both the sensitivity of the seers and the awareness necessary to draw the lines and the many points that make up the system. It’s a significant kind of work, to identify the points and lines of flow. Invisible, these seers had to use multiple testing methods to identify all of the points including understanding what opening or activating each point brings. Additionally, this system is tied to our emotions as the “gates” or meridian points can become blocked by emotion. When you can master your emotional state through cleansing the system of blocked emotional energy, the system runs much more effectively with greater vitality and physical health resulting. You can’t achieve this state through the rational mind but the feeling state or side. This is why I insist on the importance of being in touch with the feeling self. It seems many try to control themselves via the rational mind, but since it has no real emotional intelligence, the best that can be done is akin to keeping a lid on the garbage within. This is a poor excuse for dealing constructively with this stored emotion. But as this material is seen for what it is, the electrical body begins to operate more efficiently and with less emotional strain than before.

I keep coming back to the electrical hypothesis because it seems the simplest one. I also keep going back to it because of some interesting evidence that points in this direction. My question along with my thesis is does a low level of electrical potential, but higher than among those not awakened, create the bliss effects that are tied to kundalini and other “transcendant” states?

Just recently I heard about a device that a Doctor Maloy used on patients in North Carolina for moderating pain with electrical currents which was found to induce instant orgasms in women. This device has been dubbed the “orgasmatron” and it works by placing electrodes at the base of the spine to stimulate the body’s electrical network. Here we have a low level current that causes orgasm in women (sorry guys, I haven’t found whether this works on men). An article in Wired describes both the initial device as well as a newer one made to stimulate women by adding a low current at a known accupuncture/meridian point: two different devices using electricty that has similar outcomes. The original device involved electrodes to stimulate the spinal cord while the other is at the ankles at an accupuncture point. The article does read how you might expect news of a new sex toy might in the popular press, unfortunately. I’m interested, however, in the coincidence of electricity and sexual energy. This article covers the device originally designed to relieve pain by Dr Maloy.

There is also an account of Nicola Tesla meeting Mark Twain who visited him in his lab near Colorado Springs Colorado where Twain reported how Tesla showed him a new device that Twain was able to experience. When he stepped into the device he felt an extremely pleasant bliss move all through him. The common thread? Electricity. While we don’t know exactly how the device worked, what we do know is it operated on electricity and very likely used a specific electrical potential (volts) most likely in a specific frequency (although we don’t know this for sure). What we do know is that Tesla understood frequency to create a broad range of effects (even antigravity using electrogravitics since his assistant Carr went on to test antigravity devices in California).

There is also a healer who works with sexual energy to help women to heal from past trauma. His method has been to use his own field of energy to induce states of orgasmic bliss in women. He moves his hands over his clients but the effects are felt without any touch. He trained a woman named Sasha Cobra to do the work with men for the same purpose. Nityama, the originator of the method, has stopped giving healing sessions explaining that he was coming under fire by people who have tried to paint his work as somehow taking advantage of women. Sasha continues her work without so much as a blink from the public. What is interesting to me is that both healers agree that it is their energy that does it, that and knowing how to charge and stimulate the field of their clients, a process that leads to release work. I suspect kundalini achieved similar results IF the individual learns the art of surrender. It is interesting that Nityama’s work came under fire while Sasha’s did not (they are the same modality). It seems for now women will have to do the work on their own.

When you consider the power of the energy of awakening to clear blocked emotional energy through a process involving surrender I don’t think it is hard to see the role our sexuality can play as a potent healing force (if you avail yourself to it). In my experience when sexual energy is sublimated or used for healing in higher order energetics, the results can be dramatic. Refined sexual energy? Or is it creative energy that can be turned to a variety of purposes?

Unfortunately for some, the association of healing and sexuality brings up shame and guilt. But when these issues are surrendered, the power in awakening can be used for curing a broad spectrum of blocked emotion (in my experience). We need only learn how to drop our role as victim and embrace our own native healing potential. All of this can be done alone with the presence of the energy as the main catalyst and change-driver.

Huh…

While these examples would not rise to the level of evidence for peer-reviewed research, it does seem to point in the direction of how the body interprets and responds to electrical activity within the right range.

How Electricity Is Made In The Body

Electricity is created at the cellular level through a process called cellular respiration. Ions of sodium and potassium pass each other, respectively, as the cell “breathes” in nutrients and expires waste products, with a small microvoltage resulting. This electricity is used in the body for the neurological system for information processing.

Bruce Lipton recently famously asserted that this means that the body has trillions of volts (because the average potential for cells is about .46 volts) because we have trillions of cells in the body. The problem though is voltage in this case is not cummulative. It’s goid that it isn’t because in Lipton’s model with that much voltage the body would die very quickly. No, the body doesn’t have trillions of volts, but it doesn’t need to. All the system needs is what it is designed to handle. My guess is that what we call kundalini is a relatively small spike in our normal electrical function. Not enough to fry our bodies, but just enough to create stimulation that some of us interpret as sexual. The electrical potential is quite low, but the electrical potential that exists in the physical universe on average is often low also (except for planets with atmospheres generating electricity and stars producing charged plasma). Empty space itself carries a charge, something which Tesla proposed tapping into for energy. I propose that our weak field interfaces with another weak field which is the universe.

But wait, there’s more….

It appears that we can to a certain extent regulate this energy with our consciousness. Awakening is the switch that gets flipped that causes a range of effects from light, sound, or vibration being very common in the initial “rising” event of kundalini awakening or activation. What follows are classic symptoms ranging from joy, fear, bliss, and even depression (depending on how the person responds to the energy and the clearing or cleansing that begins to take place).

I will add one observation that was part of my awakening experience that shows evrry sign of this being an electrical phenomenon. When I awoke I felt a serpentine energy that felt just like a snake moving up through the trunk of my body. I can very easily see this effect as a kind of mild electrical seizure where the energy tightened and released alternating muscle groups up through the trunk of my body. At each center there was a curious sensation of the energy piercing and opening chakra centers in the body, which seemed to open my energy system to carry a new flow of energy.

I will finish with a quote from Jane Roberts who was one of the most well-known mediums for a personality named Seth:

“The universe actively loves itself and all of its parts. The world loves itself and all of its parts. It is not true that energy is neutral or indifferent. Energy is active, positive, propelled by what can almost be called an instantaneous pleasure with itself and its characteristics.”
—The Way To Health, Chapter 3: March 20, 1984

image of the human brain with strands of electricity on it.

So every now and again, this inner Presence does its thing when I am in the right kind of mind space. It always feels like someone is asking me to become part of a partner in crime….to go on this thought adventure….

So consider what it showed me. I have been writing about, as have others written about, how kundalini is at least in part the union of the opposites, two opposites that move into union. These opposites may very well be reflected in the two hemispheres of the brain as channels for cognition and then explode into something more when the two become-one, an idea that is pretty big amongst those who experience awakening and the resulting near-obsession that we can tend to have with inner union…divine union. But this little rascal in me opened a door recently and flashed that mischievous smile at me that told me I just had to follow it.

It showed me another dimension of all of this, which has had to do with research I have done over the years of the connection that exists with stored emotion being let go especially after kundalini is aroused. It’s as if the emotion is being released from the body. A close friend and massage therapist who knows energy work has many times worked on me and by pressing a spot on my body, caused an emotion to lift and release, gone forever, leaving me with a little blank spot and a little less reactivity or one less trigger. Okay, so this energetic presence is saying to look deeper at this quality. I’m not getting what it is pointing to, so it says, that as we wake up and as the two hemispheres activate in this new arrangement we call cosmic consciousness or what I used to call meta-mind (before I even knew this thing I had had a name), but that it then activates the body consciousness or intelligence that exists in each person. We don’t think of the body as having intelligence within materialistic science, but it turns out there is a LOT of information about it written in the East. In Zen Buddhism they say “the body thinks.” We say “What does your heart tell you?” and “What does your gut say?” All of these are a nod to body intelligence. Now we might at this point kind of roll our eyes a bit with that suggestion, but hang on a moment.

In recent research we have found that the human gut has as many neurons as the brain of the average house cat. Now I ask you, what is the gut doing with so many neurons? What’s more, the heart has them in a high concentration as do all of the major organs. The body or viscera has its own neurological system separate from the one that goes from the brain to the rest of the body that is called the vagus nerve. Researchers have found recently that there is more signal activity going from the brain from the heart than from the brain to the heart. Signal means information, and information implies intelligence. What gives?

So this presence is suggesting that this other “brain” is linked to the brain in our cranium during the process of awakening and that one reason why many report feeling these energetic blasts up the core of their bodies (raises his hand) is because this is the moment when this brain is brought along with the other two hemispheres into a greater unity. Then conversations I have had with people who have described their awakenings begin to make a kind of sense when they almost universally use terms to describe the experience of feeling things all the way down to the cellular level (some say atomic, but close enough). Is it possible that what we are experiencing is the linkage of this third brain into a larger consciousness and that this ties us more closely to our emotions which may well have some of their origin in the body itself? For as crazy as this may sound, we do have both anecdotal as well as established evidence that this may well be true.

In my hunt years ago for this intelligence I came across the work of researchers who gathered data from hundreds of organ recipients and found a high correlation of the recipients having what could only be described as the memories of the donor. In fact, in one case a child was able to identify the person who had killed the donor, which triggered the organ donation. The child was able to name and describe the person who had committed the murder. There are all kinds of stories similar to this one (okay, this was one of the most dramatic illustrations of memory retention in the organ) that researchers had collected. Now it is worth noting that some scientists view this area of study as being pseudoscience, but I find it to be something worthy of more study. I know for myself that my body has certainly exhibited and still exhibits some form of intelligence and awareness that is structurally different from what the brain offers, but still may make up part of our overall intelligence. If it does indeed do this, then it would be worth tapping into it for a host of reasons, many of which we might not even be able to anticipate at this point what they might even be.

My question then is this why those who awaken are able to “shake” off the trauma from the past because we are now more intimately connected with that part of the body, that the whole neural network is now aligned and “connected” by way of this inner alignment that pushes consciousness into a whole new arena of awareness? I ask the question. I’d be interested in your thoughts and experience pro or con. I don’t know what to think of this impish presence that takes me down these rabbit holes. Just had to put this down so I could get to sleep tonight.

Sweet dreams…

if you search articles in neurophysiology or neuroanatomy, you will see a raging debate about something called “hemisphericity” which implies that you can have one hemisphere more dominant than the other. Well yes you do, in some ways, and in other ways, no.

THIS article explains that you CANNOT train one hemisphere to be more dominant since the brain is so involved in cooperating between its different regions and “sides” that such an idea is impossible (and debunked in the 1980’s).

Everyone, from winners of the Nobel Prize in physics to the artists behind the Archibald Prize, used both sides of the brain when performing any task. In fact, the idea that people can be classified as left- or right-brained was debunked in scientific literature in the 1980’s

https://theconversation.com/mondays-medical-myth-you-can-selectively-train-your-left-or-right-brain-4704

The problem, I think, is that we are dealing with an incredibly complex and also nuanced biological machine we call the brain. So many regions responsible for different functions, we think, based on the data so far collected. Something gets lost in translation, I think. And while you might be using one part of your brain for one type of function, you might also be using other parts as well. If your body is in motion, well, you have the motor cortex in on the game, too. Lot’s of busy-busy. And to my mind, based on the research I have been doing over the years on the brain, I think some scholars and researchers tend to get lost in the details….because let’s be honest, there are a lot of details when it comes to our grey matter.

The same source goes on to say:

Despite this, left/right-brain training programs appear to be gaining popularity. This is puzzling because there’s no evidence indicating that you can train just one side of your brain. Such attempts are doomed because the two hemispheres are heavily interconnected and constantly communicating.

Ibid

Again, there is truth in what the writer is saying, but there is another side to all of this and it has everything to do with how we do indeed train ourselves how to utilize the abilities that appear, thus far, to be seated in one hemisphere in the brain. You might wonder where I am going with this and how this is tied into kundalini, but give me a minute.

When I was in art school, I was keen to be the best that I could be as an artist, and part of this was to learn how to use my mind to its fullest as it related to the creative process. Betty Edwards had come out with a book entitled Drawing On The Right Side Of The Brain a decade previously, and we were beginning to know a few things as it related to the (visual) arts where the brain is concerned. In this seminal work in the field of art, she explained how many people often use the wrong side of their brain when creating artwork, or in creating likenesses of people in portrait work, sculpture, or landscapes, for example. The problem, she explained, was the left brain is reductive in its approach, meaning that it tends to create abstractions and stores “ideas” of what an object looks like, not really the real thing. The left brain is great for making cartoons, but it’s terrible for creating real-life likenesses (“abstraction” means to take those details that you feel are the most important and isolate them—such a left brained thing to do). This is one reason why many beginning artists are so bad at making a realistic likeness, which is due in part to their drawing on an inner image of what they think something looks like rather than what is in front of them. It is a very difficult habit to break in our species it seems.

Over and over, Edwards showed how art students would draw an eye and a mouth all in the same stilted manner, making almonds for eyes and sardines for lips. But look more closely; do they really look like that? “Draw what you SEE!” was the admonition by my teachers. Of course, do that, but you have to get out of the part of your mind that tells you what it is that you THINK that you see. And what are the implications of being in that abstract left brain process? You are in fact living in the past. You are drawing on an inner image of what it is that you think you are looking at. You wont EVER see what is in front of you so long as you let the left brain continue its dominance in your thinking and doing.

This has everything to do with enlightenment, I promise, and it can show you the folly of trying to use the “rational” left brain in the process of enlightenment. But hang on, I am going to string you along a little longer!

By the way, you can pick up a very inexpensive copy of Edwards’ book here at Thrift Books in case you would like to be better at drawing. The book has a lot of very good exercises that actually work if you want to be better at art.

There was something about art making that I always found curious, and it had to do with what we call inspiration. It was always this elusive thing. I knew enough about it that I could lay my hands on it when I needed to. I understood it intuitively, but it wasn’t like it was something that I could force. In fact, it was the opposite of forcing. I had to bid it come. I had to be receptive to it. And that was the point. Inspiration, I found, was not something that happened in the way the logic circuits of my left brain worked. What was even more interesting to me was that I often bumped up against a very interesting outcome of the inspired state when things got really intense, and that was that i often would wind up feeling sexually aroused when things were really cooking. I can remember staying up late into the night working on piece after piece. Inspiration would breed more of itself in those solitary hours as I worked in the studio. I felt funny because I had never heard of this before. Was I weird? Was it just me? I later learned that I wasn’t alone, that a number of other artists and writers commented on the coincidence of the sexual with the inspired state. The writer Anais Nin wrote about it a good deal, as did other artists. Maybe it was natural. I felt like it must be. I suspected that the channels that carried creative energy and sexual energy might not be all that different. They might in fact be the same. Our idea of creativity might actually be the stumbling block. Some of the great artists had a charisma and were notable in their sexuality often (although not always). I always felt like there was a connection here even if I was too young to know enough to say definitively.

Fast forward twenty-five years or so, and I wake up after using a meditation technique a friend I met through an online forum who had passed it on to me. I have yet to meet him, but we had a lot of very lively conversations through email back in 2006. The result of my using this meditation method was that I inched closer to awakening with it. Suddenly suffused in a brilliant white light during meditation, I was flabbergasted, and after which everything picked up steam in the strangeness department and in a few months I “popped” and the cosmic egg was cracked. I didn’t go into this thinking that I was going to try to awaken. Back then “awakening” wasn’t that much of thing, not like it is today.

I had no idea what it was that I had. I considered I could have had a brain tumor (yes really). I didn’t speak about what happened to me to my family for close to a year. I was concerned that I could be carted off to the hospital or institutionalized. As a result of this, I spent a lot of time observing what was taking place inside of me with this new energy. I had a keen sense that I had stepped into something entirely new and I was very much on my own now. It was exhilarating and lonely all at once. I sensed that whatever this was that had happened, it was permanent. there was no going back to Kansas, there was no putting the genie back in the bottle. There was no being normal again. I felt like a stranger in a strange land. It was both death and rebirth, caterpillar and butterfly. I had no resources upon which to refer to. I studied the phenomenon closely as it unfolded within my mind and my body. I wanted to know as much about as I could summon so I could take my notes and see if they compared to any other experiences other people had had so I could get a better understanding about it. It is interesting what happens when you rely on yourself in this way. As you ask, so shall you receive. Miracles tended to happen, small ones, inexplicable ones, sometimes on a daily basis. I would later learn that these were called synchronicities, a term coined by the Swedish analyst and researcher Carl Gustav Jung.

One of the important aspects of the awakening process for me was how I felt like some new state was being brought online, activated, and it was different from the way I normally had felt. I also saw how similar the awakened state was to inspiration, something I was very familiar with. In fact, I would say, they were identical in terms of how they felt and behaved, the only difference between the two was a matter of degree. One was much stronger than the other (can you guess which one?). I wondered if this wasn’t me shifting into my right brain more, or that perhaps what kundalini amounted to was breaking the bonds that kept the right brain constrained because this unrestrained portion seemed to emerge almost out of nowhere (“almost”). I began to feel that human beings were in fact left-brain dominant by nurture, even artists like myself. I suspected the entire race was this way, that we simply had developed this way as a means of survival. Linear logical things are extremely good for getting stuff done, no doubt about it, but I think that we as a race were (and are) moving out of that old paradigm so things are shifting now.

When I learned that what I had was kundalini, I saw how the Hindu’s use the imagery of the man and woman, how one side was depicted as the feminine, and the other masculine. These images were created for a reason, and I had already felt the twin energy of what felt masculine and feminine rise up through my body. They were speaking to me about my condition.

I got to watch this curious phenomenon in myself for months, close to a year, even, before ever cracking a book on kundalini. When I saw the merging of the masculine and feminine and on the correct sides of the body, I realized, they were describing the same thing I had been experiencing. They had images painted on the foreheads of yogis called a Tilak and it was shaped exactly in the same way as my third eye awakening proceeded. I actually can feel when my third eye opens, it creates a force of pressure that is exactly like the Tilak. They were on to it, and while I searched article after article, no one really was able to explain why the Tilak was shaped this way. I knew it was shaped this way because that is how it FEELS when the third eye is fully activated (more than just a small round dot in the forehead—this was a process that proceeded over a three day period in order to completely open the third eye, a chakra that spread all the way to the back of my head in bands horizontally and in a dual-forked energy vertically moving upwards, corresponding to the Ida, Pengala, and Sushuma nadi (energy channels — the feminine, masculine, and cosmic, respectively).

They say kundalini is the coming of the feminine Shakti. When I felt this take place, I recognized it as the part of my mind that I often used when making art. It was the same, but it was also much much more present, more powerfully present once the cosmic switch was flipped. Before all of this, I had to search for “her” and then I had to wait quietly, in a receptive state. I had to become that feminine trait that was in me in order to reach the inspired state. I began to consider that the cosmic light switch was using the mind to overcome the resistance we all seem to have to shift out of the logical confines of the linearity of thought that have so predominated our thinking for so long. To open up to the right brain was like a revelation. It felt like letting the genie out of the bottle, literally, as if it had been held in such tight confines for so long. And why does it feel like that? Because everything in the left brain is small, it is highly focused, linear and logical. We just don’t realize how caught up in that part of the brain that we are. The more that I slipped into this very large space that was the “feminine” I felt like I was set free. I also felt disoriented for a time, and sometimes would go scurrying back to the familiar prison of the left brain. This is most popularly called a “contraction” in awakening circles. Every time I did this, I felt a strange pain, the painbody so many were talking about. I made it my mission to break out of painbody once and for all. It took great effort, an effort at letting go of so much that I thought was important (but was really useless baggage).

I didn’t have any proof that my theory was correct, though, and to be honest, it seemed like the whole of science pertaining to the brain was against me. I went searching, and what I found was one brilliant gem, the work of Doctor Jill Bolte Taylor who, in her now famous TED talk, described how as a neuroanatomist, she realized one morning while getting ready for work that she was having a hemmorage in her left hemisphere. She knew it was her left because her language centers began to shut down. She had trouble understanding English, she had trouble even reading the keys on the phone to try and call someone to help her. This took her about 45 minutes to do, to call out to tell a friend that she needed help. As she recounts her harrowing ordeal, she found that another brain state started to come online, one that she had never experienced before, a mystic state where everything was connected: samādhi. She stood there, tears streaming down her face, describing how incredibly beautiful the experience was. She also proclaimed that, because of the shut-down of her left hemisphere, she was able to have a unique view into a state that is normally only experienced by yogis or gurus or by people like myself (and perhaps to you if you have experienced this). Her talk, entitled “A Stroke Of Insight” was the last nail holding down this idea that I had based on little more than my own observations that this comes about by way of letting go of the tightly held control that the left brain has, probably has had in people, for centuries.

Not long after this, I looked into the concept of the left brain acting as a brake against the right brain, and as if on cue, researchers were finding new evidence for this in fact being the case in the months prior to my thinking about how this appeared to me to be at play in the awakening process (how it overcomes this left-brained dominance). I read about people whose corpus collosum, the nerve fibers connecting the two hemispheres of the brain, which had been damaged in utero through disease, exhibited some unique traits of superconsciousness, but which also kept them from being able to fully participate in society because they had limited communication between their two hemispheres. It was amazing to watch and to read how these people have incredible genius and yet had trouble tying their shoes are making up a grocery list or coping with the rigors of linear life in our world. I saw an analog with their ability to calculate numbers; I had answers come into my mind with lightening speed often, vast amounts of information, a storm of it, processed in fractions of a second. I sensed that my experience was tied to their same abilities, except because I had two intact hemispheres that could “talk” to one another, I could call on both sides of my mind, not just one.

When I began to catch on to how early Christians were talking about a unitive state that caused something to “rise” (see the gospel of Philip) and how people would go from being “dead” to alive, I felt like I was seeing how they were describing awakening. The more I read, the more I saw this pattern in their language emerge. It was curious, too, because these Christians were branded heretics and stamped out over a period of about two to three hundred years. In truth, the effort continues to this very day, but the main part of their work was done between about 200 to 400 A.D. more or less.

In their earliest writings these early Christians spoke of the “left and the right” of the “father and mother” coming together in the bridal chamber and out of their union came the Christ. While Christianity and Judaism before it had a notable and solid use of “left and right” meaning the goats and the sheep, the bad and the good, it certainly appeared that these Christians were turning these old conventions on their head (in the same way that they were turning the creation of Eve from Adam as that moment when our whole being was cleaved from its primal natural state into one that was responsible for our Fall even further because of some bite into Knowledge). Further, in the Gospel of Philip he goes so far as to say that those who do this aren’t just Christians, they are Christs. Whoo boy, nothing gets the Orthodox in a lather faster than insisting that the Christ dwells in all people and that this state of being comes about through the feminine and masculine coming into union with one another (the father and the holy ghost or sprit). Further, the feminine was revered by this group because it was she who brought so much wisdom, the ability to see deeply into things, to know (gnosis), not to simply believe (which is a poor substitute for knowledge) and to even heal.

Ideas like this sound strange to us today because we have about sixteen hundred years of entrenched belief behind the notions that we think of as Orthodox (a compound word from the Greek meaning “right thought”), but for those early Christians whom we call Gnostic, this was the authentic path to becoming Christ. And precisely because of this constellation of the feminine, masculine, and the indwelling Christ (which was treated in the same way that the Buddha is in the East which is to say that the Buddha is not a person but a state of mind that each person has within them, but is in slumber…..or more accurately, the person is slumbering before their own inner Buddha), was why this was too much for the Orthodox wing of the church to handle. Hadn’t Eve been the one who brought down the whole house of humanity? Hadn’t it been Lot’s wife who turned to look back even though she was told not to? David can go on for chapters in Psalms about how many people he has killed and no one bats an eye. Never mind that he was transgressing against the Law of Moses.

When I felt this triadic quality in myself, I thought how perfect that was: as above, so below. We make babies through union physically and we make a new level of consciousness inwardly with the two like-male and like-female parts of ourselves, an engine for enlightenment, with these two qualities which are in ourselves. This was much more natural than the Orthodox way which was an all-male club. It just seemed more perfect, more in keeping with how we are actually composed esoterically. And what better way to fold the feminine into our spiritual lives here on earth by making her the mother? The Gnostics believed that two people so awakened to this inner seed of light in themselves should have babies because that light be would all the more be kindled in their progeny, the result being an elevation of the spiritual quality in humanity.

If you want to see mysogyny in motion, you need only see how Christianity stripped itself bare of any kind of decency in what it did with the early Christians which we now call the Gnostics. To do that, you have to dig into the texts (history) because you wont see any evidence in today’s church save for cries of heresy whenever such a thing is brought up. You have to look at what the heresy hunters had to say about these people in order to know what they were fighting against. It all sounded strange to them because they didn’t understand, they didn’t have that seed of light in them which would grow like a mustard seed. And yet, traditions throughout the world describe a means of reaching an exalted state of being that required no belief, just a few very simple methods for turning the attention inward and which often involved the union of opposites within. Meditation techniques work as well as they do because it is there in such a place of quiet mind that you can begin to glimpse the lightening strike that is the realization of who you really are inside. No two worlds could have been more different though: one was literal and linear and cramped and stuck-up sexually and the other was ecstatic, vibrant and full of inspiration and light where the masculine and the feminine merged in order to form a “ladder” by which your own consciousness could ascend into the heavenly states simply and in a natural organic fashion with those two working together, not against one another. This is the core of the secret, and the mystery of the divine marriage within. The failure of the Orthdoxy was one of awareness, knowledge, and imagination, three elements crucial for navigating the numinous.

When you make the two one, and when you make the inside like the outside and the outside like the inside, and the above like the below, and when you make the male and female one and the same, so that the male not be male nor the female female; and when you fashion eyes in the place of an eye, and a hand in the place of a hand, and a foot in place of a foot, and a likeness in place of a likeness; then you will enter [the kingdom].

The Gospel Of Thomas, James Robinson ed., p. 129

I use the above quote because during what I later learned was a temporary “kundalini flash” a few months before the full rise of the energy, I wrote a piece that contained a passage nearly identical to the quoted passage in Thomas above. I posted it online on a forum. My friend who gave me the meditation technique pointed out how it was similar to Thomas. The only problem was I didn’t know that Thomas even existed. I really didn’t know, and I read it for the first time in the Fall of 2006 online. My jaw dropped to the floor. They were describing an arrangement by which one reaches a state of inner unity where the spark of awakening is kindled. I would later realize that none of this was an accident, and it had unfolded in the way that it had in order for me to realize something very important about earliest Christianity (and my role in it in the Fourth Century). It was known that there was a quality that was like a man and woman, and that they were arranged as if one was on one side of the body and the other on the other side of the body, very much in keeping with how the Hindus described it. This wasn’t an article of faith, but was instead the very thrust of the Gnostics which was they knew. They didn’t need to believe because what they had was the indwelling awareness that made union with the divine possible. And you know what? They were right.

Today as I worked in the studio, I entered into that familiar place I go where ecstacy waits. Nowadays, I don’t have to be deep in meditation, all I have to do is open to it and there it is. I have learned that this state, like the inspired state, is one where I let myself be seduced, to surrender to something higher where I then rest in a state of deep devotion and love as I go about my work. I can listen to a radio show, I can get distracted, I can even get frustrated now and it comes right back. It didn’t used to do that. All of this took time to cultivate, and I have largely done it on my own. No guru, no teacher, but a series of events and people who all had something to teach me as they came and went. Others are also doing this in their own way all across the world as more and more of us continue to awaken all on our own. Ripe. Vibrant. Alive. Awake.

What the Orthodoxy failed to see or grasp was how important our sexuality is spiritually. The reason why it is important is for the same reason why awakening happens in the first place, which is a union of opposites brought together in a rare moment where often there is a roar of sound, a sudden riotous vibration, or a flash of light (as was in my case). When I give myself completely over to this ecstacy, my mind opens like a flower opens and new faculties show themselves. I do not have to have any article of belief, but I know something divine is at work. Yes, there is nothing that compare to it except the orgasmic, but with a difference; it is as if the electrons go into a glorious precession that acts as a waveform that unites my being and in a state like there, wherever I put the beam of my awareness, impossible things begin to happen. I might think of someone and know something I can only know was true only later, or I might peer into the core of matter, or I might gain insight into something that I need to do, this insight being like a vast bundle like how a dream is often untangled or remembered after a night of dreaming. People call this today a “download” and certainly the term is apt because sometimes it can take hours for me to feel the bundle unwind. I often will remember that I had had a dream about this issue years ago, different state of mind are touched on, and none of this process is in the least logical but is driven instead by what I sense is a superconsciousness and intelligence that I rarely possess in my day to day except for when I am in love with the universe and it is in love with me. All of this sounds like what a mad person might say except that as a practical mystic, I have always sought to try and note my experiences, jotting them down when I can, to see if there is any correlation later with something in physical reality. Many times I have seen things there was no way for me to see and known things that had I told a physicist, they would just assume I was lying, that I had read a journal somewhere. I know that this experience, this ecstacy, opens us to our greater potential. And while I really take no joy in writing about it because of how it is often frowned upon because it seems boastful, I only mention it here because doing so is like me shaking your arm and pointing to the phenomenon because I know that it is possible for you to do the same. “What I do you will do also, and you will do even greater things…”

Kundalini has been described as a “libidinous” force, sexual in character, and while this is true, that it sparks sexual energy, that isn’t all that it is. I have found that everything that we have in the body exists first in spirit, that everything we are emerges out of consciousness, not the other way around, and as such, what we think of as sexual energy here on earth, which makes new life, there is a higher dimensional aspect of our sexuality which is connected to our spiritual selves, that part which survives physical death and which exists in all time. It is this aspect, which we call “sacred sexuality” which is, to my mind, nothing more than the spiritual compliment to our sexual selves. It is this part of ourselves that allows us to have union with the divine. And while some will cry heresy, I can tell you that when the moment comes when you do reach union with the divine, it will be that part of you which surrenders like one surrenders to a lover, that will make such a union possible. I can also say that when you do touch the divine, the divine will have zero shame about any of this, unlike ourselves who try to point fingers and try to make a beautiful thing an object of shame. Some of us, it seems, have a lot of growing up to do. This isn’t a mental exercise, but is instead something that encompasses parts of yourself that you may not have even known existed before. Instead of feeling shame, you will come out of that cloud of light renewed, healed, revived. Each time you step into that state, it seems as if some bit of the hard crust falls away and the mind is opened more and the logic centers go quiet because none of this is the domain of the logical. The only thing it can do is to write down what it is that that happened to you, and it will always do so poorly because language exists in the left brain and this experience cannot be contained or compassed by words.

In awakening, it is known that those who are too logical have a very hard time of it. Taisen Deshimoru, the Zen master, who taught in France said in The Ring Of The Way that monks who are “mental” were the ones who had the hardest time with Cosmic Mind. You just can’t get there with the left logical mind. You have to use the part of the brain that specializes in the holistic, the nonlinear, and that is the right brain. In fact, Dr. Taylor came back from her stroke describing the brain in just this way, despite what all of the researchers might want to say (she was there, she saw it happen in motion as a trained researcher in the field). The biggest lesson that I learned was how to stop trying to understand everything logically, to learn how to FEEL (this is not to be confused with emotion—feeling is a capacity that we have like intelligence is a capacity that we have intellectually for example). When I did this, I shifted more into the right brain process and moved into the much larger realm of awareness. The logical mind was never intended to grasp the mysteries of the cosmos. It’s job is to learn how to build a ladder to the stars, not contemplate the meaning that is behind them. It is the feminine in us that alone has the wisdom to open us to ever-larger realms of awareness. And to be clear; the two work best when the feminine is given the room she needs while not being silenced by the left brain. The feminine must now find her voice in all of us. In the process, we will all grow wiser because of it. We might even help stamp out mysogyny and begin to craft a new way to be in the world. The Gnostics had a word for those who had discovered this inner feminine and masculine trait in union: syzygy. Some have referred to it as an androgynous outcome to enlightenment, but I have not seen it this way at all. Instead, I experience it as a highly cooperative and dynamic state where two rely on each other for what it is they themselves do not possess, and which, I will point out, is very similar to what two people fall in love do, which is to admire and even lean upon those opposite traits in their beloved which they do not have. In the process of this that is spiritual and individual, it fuels the outer process as well (how we relate in the world). I know what it is like for a woman to love a man and I also know what it is like for a man to love a woman. My own gnosis has shown me in those moments of ecstacy how it must be or can be if we just learn how to develop or cultivate this form of inner and outer cooperation. I can dream.

The left brain reflects on what is known or what it think it knows. The right brain does not, in my experience, have this facility. Instead, it does the opposite; it looks much more impartially at what is happening in the present. There is a reason why so many, since Buddha first mentioned the power of being fully present, have gone on to write books about the awareness that happens in the present moment. Ram Das wrote “Be Here Now” and Tolle wrote “The Power of Now” and they are both saying the same thing that Buddha said first. This is a right-brained activity, this ability to be in the present. But more: quiet the mind so that you can begin to sense what is beneath all of the mind-chatter. It is there, they all insist, where the greater awareness lies. It is not something that you do, it is something that you are and which your thoughts keep you distracted from perhaps ever finding. The left brain will always be in a prejudiced state, and it is this part of us that seems to be running so much of the show when it comes to awareness. It think it knows, but it is only basing its thoughts on conjecture based on what has happened in the past. To know this new state you must be open to what can be, not what has been. I contend that when you can reach into this silence in yourself you are quieting the mind and that this allows you access to the parts of you which are not wed to time and space. This is the same space that is written about by the Gnostics, the Pleroma, the fullness. We are all related, we are all family, from the largest to the smallest. It is an unimaginably large family, but knowing your place in it will forever alter any sense that you have that you are ever alone or set adrift or singular only. Even in the synoptic gospels Jesus reminds the Pharisees that their scripture did say “ye are gods.” What the Orthodoxy could not imagine was that we all are. Did they just want Jesus to be that beacon of a light on a hill that we all seek to give ourselves to? Was it all just a way to herd the sheep into an ever-tightening space spiritually for control? Or was it just a conspiracy of ignorance, a failure of imagination?

Contained within these two parts of us is all the wisdom and knowing that we need to navigate them. You literally have access to vast amounts of information that is part of what the Gnostics called the Pleroma (Koinē Greek: πλήρωμα, literally “fullness”). It is here that the sacred marriage of takes place. It is firstly within, and can be bolstered by others who are likewise centered and known to themselves. Staring into the awakened can be like staring into the same infinite that one feels within ones own self. This is also where the “deficiency” that the Gnostic Jesus spoke about was resolved. This idea that we are not good enough, this feeling that we are set adrift, sinful, bad, and unloved. All of this is washed away or redeemed in the Pleroma. And Jesus was showing the way.

Even as I say all of this, you cannot get there simply by becoming more aware of what the right brain can do for you. Something else needs to happen, and unfortunately, even the yogis of India, for as good as their systems are for explaining all of this based on numerous observations by monks in the past, cannot explain what happens when we awaken. The energy rises, they say….it is aroused, they say. But by what means, exactly? The Gnostics explain this simply: by becoming one with ones self, to become known to one’s self, and then by going as deeply as one can in silence, you can then touch on that place where the union of the opposites creates the spark that cracks open the wall separating you from a super-conscious state. “Remove what divides you” said the Gnostic Jesus, something I read six months after I had done exactly this very thing which I knew at the time was the first step into self-initiation into the mysteries of the kingdom. Once there, it is a self-sustaining font of energy which gets busy clearing the “knots” of emotion, the samscaras in the Sanscrit, of the stored emotion which is out “baggage.”

It is a quantum leap, but once you reach it, you have it forever. Its power may wax and wane over time afterwards, but its force will purify and clear you so that you can be a vessel for both the divine and who you really are. In many ways it has felt like my whole body became a sensing organ, a body of awareness. Was this new mind tapping into the wisdom of the body? Do all of the neurons scientists have found existing in our organs also provide thinking potential, as vessels for awareness also? I am afraid we don’t know yet, but I have a sinking suspicion that there is a connection whereby what we think of as the brain extends itself in awakening to include the body, and expresses its twin character of like-male and like-female qualities of what the Gnostics called “the left and the right.” When I say all of this I also know that awakening itself is a fairly simple thing, but it can take years to get there. It seems you have to want it badly enough, because who else could stick with its relentlessness, its intelligence, long enough to allow the changes to take place that makes a broader awakening possible?

Achieving this state could be done through years and years of preparation. What I know is that it is possible for it to happen much faster than that. I would suggest that you don’t do that, though, since getting yourself ready for it can be of immense importance. It is true as many in India have suggested, that this is in all truth, a more deeply fundamental state which is less something that you reach for but is instead something that you already are. It seems to be activated, but it is more like waking up to what you already are. It is your get out of jail free card. I ask; are you really ready to be that free?

What happens when you begin to develop a capacity to recall past lives? In my case, when I had enough details from some lifetimes, I began to see patterns from one life to another. Normally, the lives I have lived are of people unknown to history. Over the last few years I have had clear enough recall to be able to pinpoint two lives known to history. I include this post for those of you with an interest in this type of inquiry. It is possible, with some research, to sometimes find lives that have been known through historical accounts.

A few years ago, after having a conversation with someone who I didn’t know in this life but who I had had a dream about, someone who I had correspondence with, I later experienced seeing a scene emerge that I knew was from a very ancient lifetime that involved this person. What was interesting about this experience was how clear and crisp the images were. I was able, by feeling into it, to tease out details that I “just knew” about but didn’t know how or why I knew them. This experience was a lot like putting together a puzzle. Instead of trying to “push the river” on digging stuff up, and risking possibly making something up in the process, I found myself just feeling into it and then letting myself being led into the experience.

When I say I was “feeling into it” I will explain that this is a particular form of “thinking” that requires me to be (1) very honest with myself and (2) careful that I am truly feeling instead of fabricating something. This isn’t about using emotion though. Instead it is based on the awareness that our capacity to feel can lead to realization. I think many people might have a hard time with this because most tend to discount their feeling side, or think it is inconsequential. It isn’t. Also, the more clearing work that you do, the more you open up this side of your preceptual awareness in order to better see just what is there. That said, on to what I first began to see.

I stood in a room that was a bedroom chamber. The room was made of stone with hewn timbers in the roof. Near the head of the bed there was a window. I looked out with wooden shutters which were pulled to the side that opened to the bright warmth of the day. Looking into a courtyard I saw flowers and shrubs below. This was, though, desert country. I knew those plants were there because water was fed to them. They would not have survived without daily care, not in that sun, not in this dry land. Looking out that window, I saw I was at least two stories up from the ground. I knew that this building belonged to someone who was of high status because the homes for most people were single-story buildings, made of brick or stone.

As I stood in this space, I was immediately aware of a woman who was my wife. She was tall and willowy. Her hair was kept and fell around her shoulders in tight curls. When I saw her I recognized her as the person who I had had a series of conversations with previously. She wore what looked like a dress, but this dress went from shoulder to foot and it highlighted her height. Me, on the other hand, was another story. While she was refined and well kept, I was stocky, short even, with dark curly hair and beard. The word “bull” came into my mind. I was, I knew, much like a bull. I was strong, stocky….and as I saw myself, a clear realization came into my mind: I was a general who served a king. I was aware of my “office” which was a hive of activity. It was located a ways off from where I stood. A general….but who?

I thought about how this man looked. He wasn’t Egyptian. Not Greek. Not Jewish. Not Arab or Turk. Not Persian. I kept going through my mental rollodex and ended at Babylonian. Over and over it kept coming back to that. Babylonian? Huh….

Fast forward a couple of years, and as a result of having had an experience that emerged in the wake of my having had a regression this past Summer which I wrote about several months ago, I had an unexpected outcome afterwards. This gets a bit unusual, but hang on for a bit. In this experience, I was having a conversation with an ET who I had a dream about in the early 1990’s. In this case, the ET was unlike any ET I have heard any description of. It wasn’t the typical “grey” or any other ET race I have read about people describing. While the being was the “five-point star” configuration of two arms, feet and a head (humanoid), her skin was not at all like ours, but had the look of burnt marshmallow. Her eyes were golden and the pupils were of different shape. Her head had a curious extrusion-effect along the forehead that made her head like that of a hammerhead shark (but nowhere near as much as a hammerhead). We had been talking and she was sitting in my living room, pointing to the sky explaining that she had to return from where she had come. I was hoping to get into this dream during my regression this past Summer, but it turned out we were only able to cover one early dream during that first session. As a result, my mind thought about this encounter because I wondered what the source of that dream might have been. Having read a few books on the abduction phenomenon I was aware that many abductees first had dreams as a clue that something larger was happening in their lives.

It was a curious time because not long after this dream encounter, I awoke one morning to find that my feet looked like I had been taken out of the house at night. My feet were visibly scratched like I had been dragged through a gravel parking lot. I had grass stains on the sides of my feet. The stains were fresh. The nails on my toes had also been scratched. I sat on the edge of the bed, my heart racing, wondering what on earth had happened. There was no memory of what had transpired. I searched my memory and knew that I had not been out the day before or even weeks before barefoot. I had showered the night before. Seeing this was one of those very odd things that didn’t fit and that odd puzzle piece kept screaming at me as if it didn’t belong. It was also one of the chief reasons why I decided to see a trained hypnotherapist. There was no blood and I wouldn’t say it looked like a struggle. I began to attempt contact not long ago in my present day to see if doing so might yield some answers. It was a bit of an experiment, but I considered that in all of the ET lore, beings who have become interstellar all seem to communicate through telepathy. This was a very easy way to get around the issue of different languages and since telepathy has shown to not be held to the same laws that a radio signal has (going at the speed of light and taking tens or hundreds of thousands of years to reach its target), I considered that this was worth a try at least to see if anything came of it.

It was quite the surprise when I tried this, because I was immediately in a space with that being again and what took place was…bizarre. Instead of it being a case of a cagey alien keeping its cards close to its chest, this being was incredibly forthcoming. She immediately recognized me when I reached out to attempt contact, and as I found myself suddenly in her space, which looked like a giant hangar, she did this thing where she looked down at the ground, stopping dead in her tracks, and took in a deep breath and then looked straight at me. It was just like how you might expect someone to react who hadn’t seen you in over twenty years. The reason why I am mentioning this encounter is that this being said during our conversation that she had a counterpart alive on earth and she said that I even knew this person. Now I had a moment where I did a double-take. “On earth?” I asked. “Yes…” and she brought up the image of this person and it this was the person who I had been in contact with about two years ago and who I had remembered I had had a life in Babylon with. While our exchange was not pertinent to the Babylonian life, what the being told me I passed on to my friend later, contacting her after a few years of having been out of contact. This was the bizarre part….The being explained that she was a “commander” of a small fleet of ships and did a number of different things that involved trade and shipping, essentially. When I told my friend about this she said that she had a memory of having been an ET in another life who was a “commander” in just the way that the ET had described. So it seems once you go down that rabbit hole, it gets a bit unusual.

Time had passed, two years, and since then I have had a number of releases take place. I think as a result, one night not long ago when I walked into the studio, I found the same scene of that bedroom rise up around me, probably because of our conversation two weeks earlier. This time, as I looked at that same window and the bed nearby, I heard clearly….”He was a general….who became king.” A flurry of thoughts played through my mind at this point. I realized or knew that whoever this man was, his being crowned king after being a general made the events surrounding his ascendancy to a throne a rare one….because when have you heard of generals becoming king in any culture? Most cultures with kings meant you had to be in the family. This man wasn’t. Now, two years later, a whole new wrinkle emerged that wasn’t available to me previously. I mention this because it may help you to see how “doing the work” can have other ramifications, like better recall.

I had several more details stream in in the wake of this new realization. I saw a wrought iron “keeper” that was used to hold the shutters open. This detail was in the shape of what I recognized was the seed of anise. Additionally I knew that we were involved in a practice known as Heiros Gamos, the union of God and Goddess. This practice was understood by the people to be tied to our own creative energy and when this union took place the opposites merging resulted in powerful and potent forms of manifesting. In this culture, they used this for good crops. It was desert country. These people understood creative visualization taken to a high level, essentially. I saw just how ancient all of this was. While this may have been what the kings and queens engaged in, this was part of our own individual personal power. Back then it was about the authorities doing this for the good of all the people. This was a way, if you were successful, of holding onto power. Your ability to bring good things to all of the people was what cemented your rule and position with the people. All power comes from the people even if the kings would be the last to admit it. After all, I knew that this man was able to come to power because of the backing of the people. How this happened, I was not entirely clear on. I realized that it might be possible to find out who this person was because it was very likely that his rise to power was a unique event and might be mentioned in history.

During preparing this post I did more research into the details that I saw and I found some curious things. The wrought iron detail that I saw on the wall that held the shutters open, this star-like wrought iron form I thought originally there might be no way to know for sure whether it was correct or not. What was the chance of finding a wrought iron detail in an archeological dig of the same object to show that it had indeed been used at all? In watching a video of historical accounts related to Babylon I found that the older friezes and bas reliefs found in museums showed that many of the rulers had a floral design both on their headdresses and on wrist-bands. This same design shows up on the Ishtar Gate, which was built at about the same time. While this design looked similar to the anise design, I knew that it was not a direct hit. But while watching a video of images in the natural history museum in Iraq, I saw another image that was also in some of the images, and this image showed up a number of times, and it was a six-sided star form that has the same look as star anise. While this is itself probably not strong enough evidence and it could not hold up in a court of law, it is itself a tantalizing clue that I will continue to follow to see if archeologists have ever unearthed wrought iron forms or “keepers” for shutters, for example. Could it have just been the shape for a star and not anise? Yes, it is possible. At this point in the digging I have done, it can also possibly be anise as well. I wont know until I dig further to see if I can find more details related to this. But it is a clue and when you go looking into the past, it is details like these that you have to look for to see if history offers anything tangible or directly related to your search. The fact that I saw so clearly this design in the way I did deserves a second look. If I do dig something more up I will include it here in future edits of this post. Images of what I saw are included in the images below…

What I saw was very similar to this, but there were too many “petals.” So I looked further.

Here you can see the same floret, but look to the left and another image appears…

This is a closeup…

And there is another…

This is anise. It is described as having 6-10 points depending on the variety and development of the plant. A star? Or a plant that looked like a star? Perhaps they were used interchangeably…it was grown in the region.

While I regarded this scene again, feelings flooded in that filled in some of the spaces. I had known this person before and in a myriad of ways. I felt the love, the care, the admiration this man had for this woman. I felt how something would rise up within me, that ancient knowing of how we were whenever we came into each others’ presence. It was because of other pasts that this unspeakable familiarity came. I felt the rush of feeling, I felt how unapologetic I was about who I was…how direct and how utterly unashamed I was of how I felt because of its depth and vividness. Something in her brought something out in me. It is true that some people will do that to you. For me now, it was about the creative power within the opposites as one. And yet, this was simple in so many ways, effortless even. I stopped contact with this person initially because it was often too clear, too strong, and vivid. But this recent conversation, as unlikely as it was, with an ET millions of light years away, brought it all back, nudging an orbit back onto an ancient path….With all of this and the new disclosure that this man was not just a general to a king but a king himself, I took to the internet to see what might be there.

I didn’t have to look very far. When I entered “Babylonian general who became king” the result was a singular one. There was only one general of the Babylonian army who rose to be crowned king. His name was Nabopollaser and he reigned beginning in 628 B.C. His son was Nebuchadnezzar II.

Most of the lives I have lived have been of regular folks, many who were anonymous to history. This man, though, was able to rise to power, replacing the Assyrian king Ashurbanipal not long after his death, when there was a power vacuum involving his sons who clearly were having a struggle with holding onto power and even deciding who was going to succeed him. It was a coup, but one that involved wresting power back to the Babylonians, something that the people were behind him on. That, and he had an army who would fight for him if it came to that. I was aware that here was a man of Babylon who had served under an invading king who had been part of a dynasty that had been an occupying force in the country. In a way you could say it was not unlike what is happening right now with the U.S. as an occupying force in Iraq. He chafed under this rule, but he also was offered a better life by serving this king. His own loyalty to his own people won out, and along with his tenacity and courage, he took advantage of a situation that he saw develop after Ashur’s death. Also, years ago I awoke from dream with this very strange name in my head: Ashurbanapal. I didn’t know what it meant back then, didn’t even know that it was even a name. Where had that come from? I looked it up and saw it was the name of an old Babylonian king. It went no further than that. there was no memory back then, no sense of being on to something. It was like a curve ball from out of left field.

Here is where things get interesting. This life mirrored another life that I had with numerous memories from that took place in the Yucatan in Palenque. This was itself as much of a rabbit hole as the Babylonian life because of how many details that I recalled that wound up being in line with what we know about the ruler there in South America. In both cases, these men were involved in major building projects. Now you might think, “But a king would be building stuff, right?” But if you look at the history, some leaders undertook building projects and others did not. For example, Ashurbanipal allowed his kingdom to go into ruin to a great extent. Buildings were falling apart and he just let it go. Nabopollaser came along and began shoring up the old buildings and then began building new ones. When we look at the Yucatan in 600 A.D., it was one king and his son who were largely responsible for not just building projects of significant scope, but an attention to art and decoration for those buildings. This also happened in Babylon—his son built the Ishtar Gate and while it is “just a gate” into the city, it is considered by many historians to be one of the great wonders of the world for how beautiful it was. Both used nationalistic pride to get the cooperation of their people behind these construction projects. It took time and money, man and woman power, to get it all done. Stone had to be quarried, laid, and carved for decoration. Tiles were fired in bright colors, paintings were done on temple walls and bas relief which stood the test of time even as the murals have faded were part of both lives One was alive in 600 B.C. and the other almost exactly one century later in 600 A.D.

Both built water works. In Babylon, this makes sense because of how dry it was, but in a rain forest country like Palenque, the waterworks that were built were underground and archeologists are to this day still scratching their heads to understand what the purpose of that extensive building project was even about. Both built ziggurat-like buildings (ziggurat and step pyramids). Both had sons who followed them in their reign and in their building projects. Both leaders would not have ordinarily risen to power on their own merits or based on their lineage. In the case of Nabopollasser, he filled a power vacuum after an Assyrian king died by having the army in case he needed to use them, but more by having the backing of his own people who were eager to also throw off the influences of a foreign dominating power (the Assyrians). Once crowned, he pushed out the Assyrians (an invading force that also happened in the case of our king in Palenque). In the case of our jungle king, his mother essentially created a narrative that placed him within the royal line of kings even though this narrative really didn’t exist. Both led their people to a new zenith in their culture. Both were fierce in war. Pacal fought alongside his army to push out invaders from other areas and Nabopolassar pushed out the Assyrians, both in the early parts of their reigns. What I saw in Palenque was they literally scared the poop out of the invading forces. He explained that they had to appear as savages so that it would cement in the minds of the invaders that no one should even bother setting foot into their territory again. “Don’t mess with them, they are animals, they will eat your ears off!” As a result, there was peace during his lifetime. Both were involved in using spiritual energy to help bring abundance to the people. With the Babylonian king it was through the ritual of Heiros Gamos and with Pacal, it was his sacred blood which he shed ritually. In Mayan culture the king shed blood from his penis. Patterns, anyone?

So what happens when there is so much information through recall on crossing lifetimes from such disparate times and places? Does it forge the basis for a “new” way for us to be, based on the work done in other lives? What I know is that now I am not interested in the least with looking to authorities for the source of power. Instead, the next new wrinkle is the realization that we all have this inner authority and that we each have this gift, this ability to reach into the numinous. The keys to this realization were kept away from the common people for a very long time. Even in India and in other areas, the priestly caste kept the knowledge away from people because they knew that if not trained properly, it could lead to madness (which may have been legitimate to a certain degree but they also perpetuated a kind of infancy state in humanity at the same time not realizing how important it is that we experience what awakening is).

What I see as the biggest hurdle for us now has to do with our tendency to fall for the victim meme, which is all about the past. There is no power in the past, only in the present. We can learn things from it and in terms of reincarnation you can feel into what one person was able to feel back then that might help you with how to feel into your own issues facing you today, which can be helpful. If you are unable to see how this victim energy emerges, which is the connection between how you choose to react to outward events, events that are beyond your control, and how you then choose to make those events a problem….. is a very disempowering place to be. Trust me, I know. I had to dig myself out of that trap. It was one reason why once I awoke, my marriage came to an end because I could no longer play along with what I knew was a dysfunctional way of relating with another person.

What is so interesting, though, is this man knew power….but the way he wielded it was done in a singular way and not for everyone. Likewise, Pacal was also looked to as the source of divine power to his people. It is now time for us to grow up. Our channels for creative power exists just as powerfully in every person. One of these channels is our sexuality. Everyone says that kundalini is sexual energy. I don’t observe that this is the case, not completely, and it misses a critically important point. It isn’t just sexual energy, it is that our creative energy is not divided out into discrete streams but is felt in its truest way as uncompounded and undivided. It has long been seen and known as a path to God or the Source of All Life. When we reach that level of spiritual bliss our consciousness opens like a blooming lotus and as this happens the numinous emerges and union with the higher powers naturally rises up all around such a person. Here words fail, but you wind up in a place within yourself that shows there is this capacity to know realms that your physical senses will never show you. By letting this energy in and wash through you, your own inner lotus will bloom and so much of the past junk will naturally fall away. Nearly every tradition on earth has something to add to this understanding, and as a result it is not something that is an article of faith or belief, but can be understood as any other phenomenon is understood. Those wedded to a religious belief may not like this, but in my experience it is just another reason why we should begin the process of not allowing the limits of belief to limit our experience any longer. Central to each of these traditions is a release of that which limits us. In Christianity, we speak of baptism as a ritual for washing away sin, the blocked material from our past. In the Hindu tradition they describe this as the cleansing of the nadi channels in the body where it is now shown that the body stores this repressed emotional material from the past. In the Taoist tradition ego is superceded by a larger awareness that serves to heal false beliefs. The Tibetans have much the same practices all done through their own cultural lenses. The Native Americans have the “inipi” or sweat lodge where fasting and prayer go together to clear a person of the ghosts of the past.

In some cases, to do this work, you might need certain techniques to help the cleansing along because of how hard you are holding onto it. It is one reason why some people who have awakened can still remain blocked. I was like that at one time, and I had someone more aware than I was to set me straight. It represented a turning point in my awakening process. There is way more there if you can be humble enough to be led (by the cosmic mind or higher self) or to admit that you still have a lot of shit rattling around inside of you. In every single case, instead of a rational step by step formula meted out by some teacher from centuries ago (or from now even), the most immediate one is learning to surrender and to allow yourself to feel deeper and deeper into yourself. Using this very simple way of working, you can go deeper and deeper to pull up the whole place by its roots. Feeling. But many people still think that you do this by way of the rational. The problem is, you didn’t get there by feeling rational. You got there through feeling, but broken feeling. Still, people want techniques as if those things will magically transport them out of their problems. Sometimes those things can serve to be way of keeping people walking like an ox at a mill wheel who walks all day, getting nowhere. That is because many techniques are used to get you to feel a certain way….and it worked for one person in time and everyone else followed it. This is why so many people who do yoga or meditation will sit just as the Buddha was sitting when he had his awakening. There is no magic involved in sitting like that. I awakened without doing this and while I have used it, I have found no particular benefit from it (although I will say that the “mudras” do move energy through certain parts of the body that are beneficial). If you can learn that it is all about how you choose to use your consciousness through feeling, you really have a large part of it wrapped up. All techniques, save those that manipulate the meridian system manually, are based in getting you to a certain state of feeling and thus realization. The rational mind is entirely outclassed by the quantum leap that is cosmic consciousness and can only serve as a servant and not the master.

What I have observed, too, is how we can miss past life recall. I think how we do this is critical in order to ferret out accurate details. I was able to come to it to greater and greater degrees not by seeking it but by allowing enough barriers to perception to fall, and this took a good bit of time to do. Sometimes with each release, I can often have a new memory that was tied to that block emerge and sometimes it can have its roots in another life (and in this one too).

I once knew someone who tried to claim that she had known me in a past life, which she went on to describe in some detail. What she didn’t know was that the time period that she was claiming that this life took place in was already accounted for. I had at that time a growing level of recall of my past lives. I was living in Tibet during the end of this supposed time frame she was mentioning, and before that (in the earlier portion of this time period), I had one of my first detailed recalls living as a native American living in California. This life in my past simply didn’t exist as she had described. I did consider that I might have somehow missed it, but further investigation never brought it up. It also didn’t fit me, didn’t fit how I felt about family or the other aspects which she described, and if this post is any indication, patterns can reign supreme in this work. Having that life was like a curve ball, something that did not fit in my growing landscape of past lives whose patterns could be seen in my present life. I came to see that this was about telling a truth for her, but more in a mythical way. Instead, I began to see how the details, which didn’t fit any of my past life (and present life) patterns, were instead her own. It also revealed to me the issues that remained for her to clean up in her own life, some of which dog her to this day. A quick scan is enough to know what is up on that account. As a result, we get people who believe that they were Cleopatra, or some other figure in history who is well known. It turns out that thousands have claimed having been Cleopatra in a past life.

Truth be told, we live much more significant lives spiritually often when we are just the regular person on the street. But once in a great while we wind up in a drama that is recounted in our history. With this woman, the only life I had where she showed up was in a life in Spain during the period when the Inquisition was taking place. I was a magistrate and I had to pass sentence on a host of people who had gotten snagged by the Church. In it, this person came before me doing what she wound up doing in her present life. It won her no support to my mind. Yelling in court, she (as a he) had been caught defaming people and defrauding them. My karma was that I showed little mercy when I could have spared him (her). Just from that one forty-minute exchange we wound up with this pretty difficult karma that played out in this life. It didn’t take much, really. It wasn’t life after life after life, constantly seeking and not finding, but still trying. No, it wasn’t like that at all. I think it was that way for her, though, because clearly she believed she had known me many times before. But that “many times” was really about how invested she was in her own shame and hurt, which she had created as one of the most difficult emotional traps I could think of. I ultimately had to do what I could to let her think what she was going to think because that would wind up serving to distance her from me, and it did. It wasn’t the most honest thing to my mind at the time, but correcting her own narrative was not going to happen. She was dug in. And a lot of people are dug in in just this same way. Perhaps you have been much like this, caught up in things that you believe rather than truly know about yourself. I was. I hid out for decades, hiding the true me for fear that I might be held up for ridicule. And in the end, it happened anyway, and in letting it happen I learned that how those people act is their karma and how I react is mine. I had to simply exit that burning world. And when I did, I moved into a place of peace…..my own peace….on my own terms…and this led to a much better life for me. It allowed me to get back to square one and then reorient myself to my own inner truth and not the “truth” someone else was seeking to insert into my life simply because it felt so familiar to them even though it was a broken picture of their own work that remained to be done. Projection anyone?

Delores Canon, who spent decades doing regression hypnosis into past lives, found that the details that she uncovered during thousands of sessions could be cross referenced with other regression subjects who had been regressed to the same time periods and cultures to reveal a remarkably consistent story line that tended to agree with one another. When she took people back to the building of the pyramids for example, different people would describe the same things, some of which were quite unusual and not easy to just guess. As a result, it is important to have ways I think to cross-reference your details in cases where there are historical accounts available. I was able to find an account that was identical to a memory that I had as a Californian native American man that lined up perfectly with a written account in an old Army report in a case where the natives had tried to steal horses from an Army fort in the area. This case aligned with the same time frame as my memory (which I was lucky enough to be able to place on a specific time line based on what we also have in the historical record of these people) and involved details as to the number of people in our party as well as the number of people who were wounded (I was one of two who had been fatally wounded). This kind of historical evidence and detail isn’t always possible, though. In such a case, remaining open to more details coming through can sometimes help to flesh out more details. This can take time. It took me two years before I got enough information that I was able to locate myself in history where our Babylonian king was concerned. It may not be the kind of evidence that would hold up in a court of law, but it can provide important clues in helping to lead you to a fuller understanding of what was taking place and how this applies to your own spiritual development over time.

In my case, two years went by with releases of what are called “knots” or repressed stored emotion. Once you have gone through this enough times, it gets easier and more common. A full flow of prana or chi does help, but there are methods that can assist and many involve physical movement that unlocks emotional armoring locked into the body as well as manipulating the energy centers throughout the body. All are pretty simple methods. TRE, which I have written about before, is one very effective method along with body work involving acupressure with a practitioner who understands energy. Chi Gong is another very useful modality that when applied consistently over a period of time can result in significant releases of material, especially at the earlier (first two to three years) stages of awakening (although it could also help later as well). Sometimes even reiki can help. As the energy body clears, awareness also becomes more clear. A deeper understanding can result and a better understanding of your truer nature emerges to the degree that there is a greater awareness of the unity of all things and this translates to behavior changes that are permanent. Until that happens, these states are more like places that you can visit for periods of time as a kind of taste of what lies ahead. Until embodiment takes a greater hold, you can use these visits as a way to draw you forward. Things get easier, the self trusts in its ability to more consciously co-create with the universe.

Sound woo-woo? Well, that was what the ancients were doing, and tantra does just this, a tantra that isn’t rooted in just sex. Tantra is the direct path through, not around, problems. The only problem is the trouble that you have within yourself. This is what I have found. Any problem that you seem to have with the world has its root in you. That doesn’t mean, though, that you don’t seek to help bring change to those things that appear to be bad for people in the world. But the path to real change means being clear-eyed and honest about how the change needs to happen. Then you have to help with that change.

For me, the great interest facing me in coming back again in my next incarnation is in how differently I will be creating. In personal relationships, the way that a couple creates together is limited by the karmic threads that bind them. What is their character? What I know from experience is that as a couple become parents, the karma that those two hold together attracts the consciousness of other lives entering our reality, hopefully as the very means of working through that karma. But what happens when a couple creates without the kind of karmic load as that of a generation before? Does a new kind of person begin to make itself be known? What we each are doing in our own lives, waking up, has very concrete effects on the future of the planet even if you live your life in a solitary way.

No longer do we need the kings or priests. What they did, we can do. And in the Gospel of Philip, he explains that Jesus was teaching people how to BE Christs. How could Orthodoxy manage to have gotten this so wrong? This is the danger of this old way of thinking which is that only the kings and queens can do it, or the priests and priestesses or a church or government or an “outside” institution. We literally give up our power and give the institution our power by being a follower or adherent (and it also includes our money as well). It is less doing as allowing, a very feminine trait in all of our consciousness.

I know that I have made deals and resisted the hardest of blocks. I also know that as they go, I find greater and greater peace. There is this marvelous understanding of what these blocks do that was written in the Gospel of Philip from the Nag Hammadi Library which I include here:

That is why the word says, “Already the ax is laid at the root of the trees.” (Mt 3:10). It will not merely cut – what is cut sprouts again – but the ax penetrates deeply until it brings up the root. Jesus pulled out the root of the whole place, while others did it only partially. As for ourselves, let each of us dig down after the root of evil which is within one, and let one pluck it out of one’s heart from the root. It will be plucked out if we recognize it. But if we are ignorant of it, it takes root in us and produces its fruit in our heart. It masters us. We are its slaves. It takes us captive, to make us do what we do [not] want; and what we do want we do [not] do. It is powerful because we have not recognized it. While [it exists] it is active.

The more private teachings of Jesus and the ones which were hidden away for at least 1600 years and recovered in 1945 show a sophisticated understanding of how important it is to do release work. We might call it suppressed emotion today and they might have called it “evil” back then, but it is clearly the same thing. They saw this work as leading to “life” instead of “death.” I can tell you that when you do this work that your perceptions change simply because your beliefs that you hold that are part of the blocked emotion limit your perception and understanding of many things in the world, you see through a distorted lens, which then falls away (and “everything” about what that belief did to you changes). I have known people entirely caught up in their own inner story which had little to no relationship to the outside world. I was one of them, too. For myself, I see that all of this was a doing based on limited understanding, a growth through lifetimes, chapters in a larger book of life. Then later in time, there came a life that was made to open it all up. If you are awakened, then you are this life, made perfect for this work, so don’t doubt yourself. Step back and let that master within you show you what can be.

If you thought this was an interesting dive into reincarnation, you might find an associated post about how to navigate the professional victim worth a look..

https://wakingtheinfinite.wordpress.com/2016/03/29/the-victim-mentality/

I will be putting up a new installment in my ongoing effort to provide information about awakening (in the context of kundalini) through interviews. Being my busy time of the year for me at the studio, I am happy to be able to get this next one out to you in the next week.

I decided to create a battery of basic open-ended questions a few years ago for people who have experienced this phenomenon. While the questions ate limiting on the one hand, they serve to build a reference source because as each new interview is added, the same questions get asked. My hope is that the answers from my interview subjects will begin to create a spectrum of responses that may help illuminate in the mind of the reader the degree to which this phenomenon can vary from person to person while still standing under the big tent cover of awakening.

I am happy to include anyone who would like to participate in this project. You can choose to be anonymous if you wish, but I am happy to link to any web sites that you might be involved with so others can read your blog, or learn more abput what you do or up to our there in the world. Stats show a steady review of these interviews on weekly basis. Each interview is first posted and then a dedicated page is created where the interview remains at the top of the WTI blog so it remains easily accessible.

For inquiries about participating, you may reach me at info@staffordartglass.com.

Have a great day!

Chi or Qi is seen as a function that has many benefits in all parts of the body. This function is broad so it is possible to know and experience chi in many aspects within the body. QiGong means “energy work” and if you begin to practice it, you can begin to develop a greater awareness of and control over your own chi. When I say control, I mean learning how to channel chi in a manner so that it benefits all systems within the body, from bones, to muscle, organ, lymph, as well as the vascular and nervous system. Chi can serve to invigorate all aspects of your existence when it is channeled and used in a conscious and beneficial manner. It is at once meditation and low-impact work out. It also allows you to learn how to tune into your own energy field. It can lead to peace, joy, and bliss.

The path of tantra is the path of bliss, which uses an aspect of chi to “burn” through karma quickly (by always “going through” not around) The Chinese were introduced to tantra by the 4th century through Buddhism. Tantra did not begin as being about sex, but since tantra is based in bliss, sex soon became one of several branches of tantra. This system has its basis in understanding how energy flows can be sustained in order to bring healing and transformation.

I began practice with QiGong in late 2008. I learned White Crane QiGong. This is the same method of QiGong taught to the Shaloin monks who were tasked to protect the emperor of China. Many movies have been made that have turned these men into mythical creatures. While I cannot say that I learned to fly (like so many fictional characters are made to do) by learning White Crane, I did learn how to learn to tune into my own energy in a more deep and contemplative way. It led to removing many blocks, which is stored emotional energy that every person has and is the genesis of many neurosis’ that people suffer from.

QiGong is made up of a series of movements, each with a name to identify them. I noticed when doing certain movements that I could feel my energy either being spread out or pushed down, or moved around in a way that I could notice and later feel more and more. By having a quiet mind listening to the right kind of music, you can wind up in an almost trance-like state, one in which you are as calm as a quiet lake and moving slowly, gently, but purposefully.

I found that I could relate to QiGong without ever knowing precisely what the movements were for. It was clear to me that by practicing this discipline that it was having beneficial effects and I could feel Qi flowing in a way that it had note done before.. I think that Westerners do well with QiGong because before you can silence the mind through meditation, you can find a deep state of calm and alertness while keeping your body busy with the movements.

QiGong has the benefit of helping to release stuck energy. If you are already familiar with energy or are in the midst of a kundalini awakening, you might find this practice very helpful in helping to speed the release of blocked energy. I have mentioned QiGong many times in my blog but I have not gone into it in any real depth. It is one of only a very few disciplines that I have practiced in my life. It helped release many blocks in my body, mind, and heart. It is the path by which silence enters you and makes of you an even greater silence. It can open your experience to the mysteries of the world of energy.

The method that is being shown in the video is nearly identical to the QiGong that I practice. It is being called Shaolin QiGong. I suspect, though, that this is used in order to capture an eager Western audience who knows about the Shaolin monks. This is White Crane. The wonderful thing is that you can set up the video and follow along in front of your t.v. or computer. It is helpful to make the movements as graceful as you can. It is not forced, but is a mix of attention, purpose, force, and response. You will begin to feel effects, which are subtle at first, but as you go along you will be better able to tune into the silence and the energy that awaits you. Instead of expecting any effects, just wait for them. If nothing emerges, just keep going and don’t worry about it. In time you will grow to become familiar with what it can do for you. In China is was felt that this movement was a way to gently tone the body without wasting energy and it was possible to slowly begin to store chi in the body through the bones and marrow. This might be true, but I think what is certainly true is that it leads to a calmer and more peaceful state of mind where you can meet the chi and see what it is doing. One imporrant tip: in most movements it is important to watch the movement of your hands. Doing this does something akin to helping to complete an energetic circuit. In the video, watch for when the monk looks at his hands for certain moves (but not all). These are important.

All of the movements have a purpose. A lot is done through the hands and arms as a way to move your energy around you. Some movements are like raking through the larger energy field while other movements are there to help compress or pull in the energy. I think it is very much like a massage of the energy body. If you find yourself feeling uneasy, nauseous or clammy after practicing for a week or two, consider that the energy is working very well for you. If this does present itself to you, keep going because a lot can be done in a short period of time. Additionally, if you go to Yotube you will find many videos on QiGong and they can help you to understand what this very old method can done for you. Happy Qi travels…

This video will explain the effects of Chi and the benefits of QiGong on the body and mind

A friend sends me a link to a documentary called Earthing. The documentary describes the relationship between physical health and how we are able to actually ground our bodies for a host of health benefits. The documentary explains that since the advent of synthetic rubber soled shoes, the human body is unable to establish a proper ground with the earth. We live inside of houses that also keep us from becoming grounded. With our shoes keeping us insulated from the earth’s own field, humans spend most of their lives now ungrounded.

Turns out that this lack of grounded has a known effect on the human body. The documentary traces the need for grounding back to electrical devices which always need to be grounded or else voltage spikes can happen. Turns out that there are a lot of problems associated with electrical equipment that is not properly grounded. The human body, though, is also an electrical system and it turns out that it too needs to be grounded regularly. The effects of not being properly grounded are broad. While it is foremostly electrical, this buildup of electrical potential has, in turn, an effect on how the body regulates itself even at the cellular level. In fact, with over twenty peer-reviewed papers on the subject, the growing knowledge base related to grounding spans the spectrum from a reduction to inflamation in the body, hormonal output and regulation, sleep cycles, and even to certain cancers and other conditions related to how improper grounding can affect the body. Vagal tone is improved in premature babies, blood clumping is reduced significantly resulting in a host of physiological effects. There is also a modulation of glucose and erythrocytes metabolism in exercise. It is certainly worth a look-see to appreciate how this fairly new-found effect has on the body. I will link to this documentary at the end of this post. There is a link below to the studies that examine the effects of Earthing (or grounding).

So I begin right away to ground myself. Each night, before going to bed, I ground myself. I find right away that sleep very well. Then I go ungrounded for about a week and find that I have insomnia. Hmmmm. In addition to this, during my experiment, I experience no restless leg syndrome. Coincidence? Time will tell. However, tonight I will be going back to grounding again before going to bed to see if my bout of insomnia last night was a coincidence. I often find insomnia happens in clusters. Will it clear it up? We will see. Now, to make clear, while I did have trouble getting to sleep, I still was able to get a full eight hours. Yes, my cycle is a bit off, which should mean that I should expect to have trouble getting to sleep at the usual time, if anything. In addition, I will be paying attention to whether I experience any restless leg syndrome.

In the meantime, I will say that this might be something that you should try to see if you notice any differences. The technique is simple: you take off your shoes and you stand on earth. You want to make sure that you are standing on the ground, not concrete or anything that might disrupt full contact with the earth. This is important because within seconds, the body begins to ground itself. The process is pretty fast, but many people will keep themselves grounded all through the night or during the day throughout the day. I found that I could feel a difference within several minutes of standing on bare ground at night. I do this about an hour before going to sleep. I am barefoot and simply stand on the ground.

The concept is that our field equalizes with that of the earth’s own field. Our bodies are designed or have evolved using this baseline electrical potential. Without it, we wind up with a host of illnesses, all of which are ameliorated with this simple technique. I can remember many years ago a native medicine man explained that part of the problem that most people had was they didn’t go barefoot on the earth. He explained that every person needed to ground themselves to the earth, that it provided a host of benefits. I will admit that all those years ago the idea sounded a bit odd. I knew the body was an electrical system, I just never made the connection between our energy field and the field of the earth. The benefit is well more than just how good it feels to have your feet in the grass or on the ground.

UPDATE: So I grounded again last night for about five minutes. I could swear I could feel the change as it rose up my legs and into my torso. It kind of felt like I was powering up from the soles of my feet all the way up through my body. But instead of powering up, it was more like I was becoming more balanced. Nice effect. Then I went to bed about half an hour later. I was able to go to sleep without any nagging insomnia like before. Give it a try for a few weeks and let me know what your observations are!Do you have inflammation? Restless legs? Energy off-kilter? I’d love to know.

Also, in my next post I am going to give you a little awareness about the power of breath work. It is simple and it can make huge changes for you, especially in meditation and any kind of inner work you might want to do. I often see it as the first door inside. I think you will like it because there is a fun exercise that the presenter will provide you with!

To see the studies conducted on Earthing go here:

https://www.groundology.co.uk/scientific-research

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I was searching kundalini awakening on Youtube today, a first for me in quite some time. I didn’t know what I would find or even what I was looking for. Then I found her there in India….she has this hard unyielding way, but she is also able to express what I might need to thrash about in a poetic trance to spit out. Any insight is always appreciated. More about her in a moment.

The questioner asks her how to deal with the issue of having the feeling of the other within…even though it has been a lot of time since they parted ways. I am reminded of how these “twin” or soul connections work and how people I know even years later are still affected by their other. I know how I have been affected.

So I came across the work of Maharishikaa on kundalini. She helped a man who was really having a hard time in one video. Then quite by surprise there was this touching video about a woman who was trying to move on when her soul connection abruptly moved on without her. She came trying to find a way through this. The response I found to be unique, novel, and beautiful. Watch what she says. I think maybe the way through is not to go away but to go through. Step into the fire, do not run around it, ask what remains and be ready for what might come. For me, the answer was so simple, really. So much fuss over such a little hitch in my heart and ego.

Some put so much on these connections. More than they deserve, in my experience. At the same time, though, they help to show us what love can be, how we are the love instead of that moment of dissatisfaction that then fuels a connection later, in another life.

I find the arrangement to be paradoxical once you see what happened (in another life). It is like bread dough left to rise too long; it winds up much bigger than it ever was in that last life. Perhaps it is the effect of letting karma go for a single life – it grows bigger than it was when first minted.

Except no one seems to know this. That, or all my searching has somehow led me astray. Aren’t we passionate about getting it right? Could that be enough to open such a vibrant portal to the soul and it’s love?

We only see the large loaf and surmise it is more than it is. The paradox is…..that it is more than it should seem. Perhaps that is what these connections do; they open us to the love shining in the soul. For the soul, it seems that this is an everyday thing, completely common. But here on Earth, it seems singularly unique (which of course it is). It remains enigmatic to me. I wish I could go back to those simpler days of believing that it was a twin. It is, tbough, more mysterious than that. Perhaps it is enough that it moves us as it does. For what else makes us examine so much over something we might not have ever known that much about?

I know it may not make sense, but I think there is something here for those who need it. We let go of our need for it to be a certain way. When we do that, there is a greater peace and this cosmic presence expands and it’s one less thing that creates pain. We think it is about them when it’s just about our reaction to something that we think fell short of expectations. This is, I think, the genesis of these soul connections.

I want to take a moment to tell you about someone who has figured strongly in my awakening journey.  I want to mention her because of how much experience she has in the arena of energy, consciousness, and awareness.  There is the saying that when the student is ready, the teacher arrives.  For me, this was true.  I wasn’t going to find a traditional teacher, though, this much is true, but at a very specific point in my awakening when I began questioning what it was that I was reading and hearing about the phenomenon (Twin Souls/Flames especially), she came along at just the right time. We struck up a friendship and would have conversation about the process of awakening, consciousness, and how we can recreate our lives to find a better way.

My friend is a professional psychic intuitive and has worked in the field for decades.  She is not a fortune-teller but is someone who uses her gifts to supercharge change for her clients.  She has worked with individuals, couples, groups, and businesses large and small.  Her gifts have been used on start-up projects that have gone on to do big business, to couples who are wanting to get married.  Big or small, Ali has helped people from every walk of life.  She is like a big fish that you would never realize is the big fish because of how humble and soft spoken that she is.

My friend and guide was born with gifts that were off-the-chart incredible.  Talking to her at first, it wasn’t readily apparent just who I was dealing with, but as time rolled on I began seeing the evidence of her gifts.  I have been lucky to have known her since 2008 to the present day.  I have gone through my own contortions and difficulties during that time, have remained dedicated to pushing my own envelope of understanding and find that my friend is still there as brilliant and as insightful as ever….and forgiving of my own difficulties when I try to push them onto others (we call that projection!).

What is so amazing about my friend and her gifts is that she was not born with the “veil” that most have.  If you ask me how this veil works, I will tell you that I think it is very simply a process related to our development here. It is also how our brain works in consort with consciousness and the way that some parts of the brain actually “brake” other parts that have the ability to process information that doesn’t come from the five senses. I say this because I have had my own forays into this realm, perhaps just enough to get me into trouble.  But in truth, Ali is like that person who didn’t get programmed to be like everyone else and the barriers that most people have, she doesn’t.  I know for my friend, based on having known her over the years, living this way can be very hard because you feel EVERYTHING.  The other side is super crazy and over-the-top psi ability. My own sense is this is part personal interest that accrues over lifetimes, but can also be a feature of the awakened state.  Kundalini, after all, is said to bring many abilities, and Ali has had this since she can remember.

I think most people who have done the work like she has simply are at a place where they no longer need to reincarnate here, so perhaps this is why we don’t see a lot of these types of people. People like her are rare.  I know in my own experience that I am showing evidence of pulling back the curtain through a growing memory of past lives both here in this reality as well as others. Perhaps you have also been experiencing this very thing yourself, so you might know what I mean firsthand.  I know that along with awareness there seems to be a willingness or ability to begin using our minds in ways that are contrary to how most are taught here on Earth….all of which contributes to enough of a difference that we begin to see more and more open windows through consciousness.  At least, this has been my observation thus far. But the point is, my friend is so clear she can get to the crux of a problem so fast that you will be left wondering what just happened.

I am writing about my friend because I want you to know her.  I am telling you this because more people need to know about her because the gifts she has are remarkable.  While she is a healer, her healing work is so incredibly versatile that she can do her work over the phone and literally work a miracle for you inside of twenty minutes if you are ready.  These things happen so fast that I am left wondering what just happened sometimes.  It’s hard enough living in a world that wants to pooh-pooh these things as it is, but if you suspend disbelief and go into work with her with an open mind and a ready heart, there is nothing that you can’t do with her help.  I know I am waxing grandiose here…but let me explain…

A number of years ago my friend came to visit my home in Virginia.  While she was here I had been invited to a gathering by a family friend and I took my friend along.  A lot of the people there knew me and were curious about who she was and why she was there with me. My friend explained that she is a healer and an intuitive.  In minutes, she was in the next room conducting impromptu sessions with people whom I have known since I was a kid.  My friends looked at me before we left to go home, “Where did you find her?  Oh my goodness, she is the real deal!” I have watched my friend as she has held healing sessions with friends, and I have seen what she has been able to do for me over the years.  It has remained consistent in terms of her level of ability. Yes, she is the real deal.  My friend is remarkable, a real talent, and I feel fortunate to know her.  I feel fortunate because for so long I didn’t know anyone who liked to talk about the things I like to talk about in terms of our hidden potential as beings here, or how to tap into alternate layers of consciousness, or how events begin to change as consciousness is used differently.  When she does work with her clients things can change on a dime.  I don’t know why she shouldn’t be a household name.

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My friend is Alison Neville.  She lives in California and she has the gifts of clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience, and an ability to read and heal energy.  She has had these gifts her whole life.  She began to learn to use them in her twenties and has been doing so up to the present.  Her “toolkit” is so inclusive that there isn’t a situation that she can’t work through with aplomb.  As a result, Alison doesn’t employ methods or scripts, she just goes into a session and uses what needs to be used at the time.  Each session can be wildly different one from the other.  It is because of this that her work is so beneficial.  You aren’t getting a script, you are getting real boots on the ground work. It is why sometimes when I start a conversation with her I might wind up completely surprised with what comes up because of something that her inner guidance says that puts us on an unexpected trail.  More about this in a moment. I will say that if you find yourself wanting her help, all you need to do is to be clear about what you want to cover because she will do that so long as you are honestly seeking to get to a better place.

You don’t have to believe in this phenomenon in order to benefit from what Ali does.  But what Ali does is not some cute parlor trick.  I have spent sustained time with her over the years and there was no way that she was able to gather all the information beforehand just in order to make it seem as if she had a gift.  You know what I am talking about here; the cynical skeptic, who, no matter how much proof they are shown, refuses to concede that there might be something to what she does.  This is probably an occupational hazard for her, but either you want help or you don’t….and even for  cynical skeptics Ali delivers in spades.  It makes you wonder why someone would fake it if they were so incredibly good at bringing solutions to your life that work so well? I guess I don’t think about those things because I have been around Ali so much over the years and I know that it’s real.

In the beginning of our correspondence and discussions, Ali helped me to remove or heal a long-standing issue from my childhood as it related to my Mother.  It was a thorny problem that had eluded me for about forty years.  It had developed at a time that was so early in my life that I had lost all hope of being able to use memory as a doorway for getting to it and healing it.  Ali showed me that these kinds of things are always accessible and so we used feeling (instead of memory) as the doorway.  One moment I was talking to her on the phone in my car headed to the studio and the next moment I am settling down in a chair in the studio, the lights off, with her speaking and taking me into a guided meditation.

The effect of healing this issue was like correcting something that had been wrong for years inside of me that I had been projected outward as something that I believed was a problem with the world, or my Mother. Gently my perception was turned ’round so that I was able to see it in the right way.  Once seen in the right way, once truly heard and examined without the distorting lens of my beliefs about it, this healed very quickly and righted itself.  That was in 2008 when that happened.  It changed my relationship with my Mother from that day onward.  Having been in the mental health field as a counselor for years, my Mother wondered how on earth I was able to heal something from such an early place in my life.  I had help from Ali.

That experience is emblematic of the huge leaps forward I have been able to make.  The truth is that the vaulting would not have been possible without her help.  When I write in my blog about having had an energetic “reset” years ago that helped my energy field become many times more sensitive, it was Ali who helped with that.  Yes, it was hard to deal with, but just when I thought my sensitivity had gone through the roof in awakening, what she was able to do for me showed me that there was no ceiling on our roof at all as my energetic system was put into orbit.  I’m not exaggerating, here.  My being able to understand how grace is tied to creativity, that was Ali.  My being able to step into my authentic self in many important ways, it was in that time when she and I were conversing and she was sharing her insight with me. I had simply manifested the influence that my soul needed most for that time.  Now I sense that there are others who also need it.  They might not know it is so, but that is how these things happen.

Just last week I was visiting her helping her with some marketing work for her business (and going to visit a regression hypnotist/counselor) and while talking one morning before breakfast, we wound up in a healing session. This wasn’t something we had talked about, it just happened.  A block that had eluded me my entire awakening was resolved inside of forty minutes.  Just like that. I could feel into my own field in a way that I had not felt before….maybe ever.  This was so important for me because I knew that if I was ever going to do any healing work myself, I knew that I could not be working with people unless I myself was healed….that was my own bit of guidance.  So this outcome was really important for me on many levels.  How I feel and relate to my energy now is very different.  Wow.

When I went out to swim in the ocean later I began hearing a voice speaking clearly within me that I had not been able to hear before. The block in the root had kept me from being able to hear clearly something that has been a part of my life and my soul existence for a very very long time.  It was like the cherry on the top hearing and feeling this presence that I simply could not meet or feel or hear until I did this work. As we open and clear ourselves we are more able to use our innermost senses in a more dependable and less distorted way. At least, that is how it seems to me.  The clearer we are, the less invested we are in an agenda.  The source of all life is supportive and free from agenda beyond that of love.  I find that as I go through this process, this is what I am moving into each day. How do I learn from Source?  How do I learn from Ali?

Some of what Ali does is energy healing.   How she does this from a distance over the phone is the remarkable part.  While much of what she does can be understood through the lens of known healing modalities, Ali has explained that much of what she does is the result of her own inner connection to what she calls her “guidance” which always seems to know exactly what needs to be done at just the right moment.  So it might be energy healing on the one hand,  the next minute it might be reading an ancient time line, a past life, or speaking with a relative that has passed.  She might do something completely unexpected, even for her, within the span of a session.  In short, there IS no pattern, every single session is unique.  If you watch true pros you will find that they don’t have scripts that they speak from.  They embody what they do. Ali is one of these pro’s.  It’s what made our talks so interesting.  Maybe someday she and I will put our heads together and do a book about these talks. It would be so interesting I think for the very reason that none of it would be scripted, not even once.  You just have no idea.

There is sometimes this freewheeling feeling in a session with her where you are asked to consider what life might look like outside of your own perceptual box.  Now she has you beginning to set up the very conditions for transforming your life, maybe without even realizing it.  By helping to surrogate the energy necessary for rebuilding the conception of what you think your life could be, she serves as this bridge to what your life will be once you decide to take that one little step into what seems like a vast cosmos. It can happen so fast you don’t even see it coming.  You might not even realize that she is holding you in that place, holding the seed of it and waiting it for it to germinate and to find it’s root in a new level of your life. You can actually root yourself in what seems to be a new cosmic place…..maybe it was just a place you never thought was even possible for you. We have chosen all of this, our choices are just that; choices.  Those choices may have represented the very best thing you could imagine.  There was a time when we built rockets that went up only thousands of feet and thought that was an amazing feat, but within a decade we were sending rockets into orbit around the earth.  Then we went to other planets.  You see what I mean?  Working with Ali can be like this.  The limitation is that you think you are limited.

And that is just it.  We each stand at the edge of a limitless cosmos and all along it is we who are limiting and choosing what we will experience.  Yes, you are in a body.  Yes, you are focused in this reality with a set of senses physically.  You are also more than just this one body.  So I ask, what on earth are you waiting for? 

As a result, Ali is one of the most innovative healers ever.  Missing a loved one who passed?  She can tap into that person right now and help fill in any gaps that you might have.  Have difficulty with your supervisor and don’t know why? Ali can dig into that and help to explain what is at work.  Not only that, but she will take your hand and show you how to heal it.  Poof!  Now everything has changed for you with your supervisor and anyone else after that who is like that supervisor.

Maybe it is a challenge with a relationship.  Maybe it is with a parent (like me) or with a spouse, a child, or a friend, it really doesn’t matter, that is how flexible her gifts are.  Maybe you can’t quite understand why the relationship dynamic is the way it is.  Not only can Ali help shed light on it, she can also help you to change everything about it on a dime if you are ready.  Maybe you are starting a business or you want to take your business to another level–Ali can tell you exactly the things you will need to work on in order to manifest that type of abundance in your life and to make it work with the fewest hangups as possible.  You of course need to be ready and you need to make yourself available. But if you can be as innocent as a child, you will not only change things for good, you will have great fun doing it because that is just how Ali is.  Ali is remarkable.  I want you to know about her gifts because I have been helped so much, my friends have been helped, and people that she knows have also been helped. I was able to do in half an hour what might take people years using traditional talk therapy.  I actually think therapy has its place, but what Ali does is she cuts out all of the preamble and gets right to the issue at hand.  The only problem with this might be that you might think that there is no way that she can cut to the chase so fast.  Way.

There are no accidents.  You are the one who needs to hear this right now.  Her gifts are amazing and more people need to know, and now I am telling you.  I have nothing to sell and nothing to gain. If there was a time when her skills were needed, that time is now. If you do get in touch with her and work with her, come back here and leave a comment  about your experience. I want the world to know. I want you to know.

To get in touch with Ali start here:

https://www.alisonneville.com/

 

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