Make No Excuse

We don’t need to make excuses for ourselves…..nor for what we suspect or feel is the right thing for us.  You don’t need to make excuses for why  you march to a different drummer or why your karma is one color while your best friend is another. It’s okay to wear what makes you happy and others not so happy.  It is their issue, not yours.

Be yourself.  This is what I am actually telling myself.  Over and over for all of the times I shrank back into myself afraid of how someone would actually react or feel or say or be in the wake of me gloriously free within myself.  I am here to clean up this shite!  Old stories, old hurts, old loves, old knowing, old mysteries…..all of them, a virtual horde of mysteries from other times that my soul now says ENOUGH!  Let us now get this stuff straight!  No more bullshit.  What if the things that seem are my weakness is what will make me the strongest? What if someone being so different is what makes them fabulous? I think about growing up with closeted gays in high school…..closeted out of FEAR of being bullied, or worse, maimed or even killed.  I think about the lynch mobs….all because people are different….blacks growing up angry because of how they and their families have been treated by ever sector of the world….things are turning around some…I see it…I was walking to the tech center today between classes and thinking about how my male students are no longer afraid to be openly gay.  I say “Hooray!!!”  It makes me so happy my heart weeps.  That we have reached a place where people feel safer then they have in a very long time to just BE themselves.  What if BEING who you are has a sacred DIVINE purpose?

That is because it does.

So some do not understand nor relate to mine.  They don’t have to.  It really isn’t their job to.  It is mine. The lifetimes of junk ends in this life….this I am clear.  So I am sorry, I can’t go to your party or be a part of your golf game or polo team.  I have stuff that is mine to work through. Selfish?  You better believe it!  Maybe for the first time in a while I do for me what me needs most.  Lonely?  It is.  But I think my soul knew that.  We are such social creatures….we really are.  And when we awaken, the thin invisible lines of connection become so much more apparent, don’t they?  The world resolves into this amazing thing turning in our heart and in the soul of the world….

The last dragon is being slain….transformed….turned…healed….I cannot say what will result..I have remained as open as a window because I want this done as quickly as possible. The Cleansing!

Don’t make excuses for you. Love yourself.  Cherish yourself. You have all the time in the world.  People who are no longer available, well, were they really EVER available?  The only person who can truly go the distance with you is you so being on good terms with that you is pretty big.  Are you happy?  Are you at peace? Are you learning what the universe is throwing your way? Would you like to swim more and talk less, hum more and read some books?  Would you like to pick up a new hobby or read about bonobo’s in the wild or how it is that there are more neurons in your stomach than in the brain of a cat?  There is so much to know and experience for no other reason than to have been here now in this time and place, which is itself utterly unique.

Like you.

Enjoy the ride!

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The Great Wheel Has Come Full Turn

When I was eighteen I had a spontaneous memory of a past life as a native american man who was sitting having a vision of the Thunder Beings in the grassy meadows atop a hill in western California at a time when some of the first encounters with White Europeans were taking place.  The experience was extreme for me in that it was as though I had been placed into a culture completely foreign to me in some ways.  I felt familiar, yes, but it was hard to understand what was happening.  I was being told about the future, about a life when I would be reborn as a new person.  The being in the storm explained that I would know when all of these things would come to pass because I would remember the vision in this future life.  That future life is this life, now.  The being spoke of earth changes, about a need for the earth to cleans herself.  I was shown a form of cleansing enacted by the Thunder Bird, something that involved its merging with me in my body so that I became one with this bird.  The heavens or sky was connected to the earth by way of a thunderbolt. This merging of heaven and earth changed the energy of the earth.  The earth lit up with a supernaturally bright light; the light of the lightening bolt.  The earth was then cleansed.  I was told that the Great Wheel would come full turn in this day.  I had absolutely no idea what that meant.  I spent years reading up on native culture and customs and belief.  I found that I only discovered the tribe when I gave up looking.  I also found that the vision was itself a story about how, in our age, in OUR day, we would witness a fundamental shift in our world energetically and that we would see a return of the feminine in each of our lives.  This is itself the balance that the Hopi speak about, a balance that has been lost in the Western world, that has been systematically destroyed in the aboriginal cultures.  It may have been nearly wiped away, but it is not gone.  This ancient knowing and reverence for the Two-As-One remains.  And I am here to tell you, remind you, how important it is.

Its really simple, and yet, it has been forgotten and shoved under the rug for so long.

It is the return of the divine feminine.

The return of the divine feminine is something that will be on offer to all of us.  Her presence in each life, not just a woman’s life, will be potentially life changing.  Men are softening.  Women are noticing this.  Women are reclaiming their power, discovering their deep current of feminine energy and presence.  As we all do this, as we all soften and are changed by the presence of Her on the planet, we will continue to learn and see more through those eyes than ever before.  Not to worry; her presence does not make a man any less of a man. In fact, it makes a man far more sensitive to what a woman needs and how she feels.  Its just that as a collective, we are now ready for her after centuries and centuries of not having her all that present.  IN the warming days that face us, she will offer up new discoveries about what we are and what we can become.  She will have a humanizing effect upon us.  She already has.  We have a long way to go, but I tell you that this movement of the wheel is so strong that while you can resist, the most natural current will be to follow it.  It will be like fighting an undeniable current.  And she will teach you how to flow.

The presence of the divine feminine will teach you how to surrender, to allow, to receive, and to let go. She will be a presence whereby she can take any spiritual poison into her and transmute it through the power of her womb, through her natural ability to receive and treat all things in her own uniquely alchemical fashion.  For ages woman has often been forces to take poison into her womb and her heart, but the tables will turn and she will discover what she can do when she is in full possession of her powers individually an en masse.

The one experience with the divine feminine that I had most recently was how she moved down all around me and then said “let go.  Let all of it flow into me; this is what I am—a great engine of transmutation….just let go…” and in that moment, tears streaming down my face, I felt Her all around me, like this giant presence, a womb of the world and instead of holding on to this ancient poison in my soul, I let it go.  It streamed out of me and rippled out all through her.  It was as though it was nothing for her; snake bit turned to gnat bite.  I felt nothing but love.  Within my own heart I feel the dual current of kundalini and She resides within one of them.  She exists as the divine template, literally the feminine guru within.  I don’t need a teacher to tell me how she needs most to be, she dwells in me.  Touching another with Her in my touch reminds them without words of what they have been missing, craving.

She has been away for a very long time. She is gonna come back with a vengeance (but without vengeance).  How will it play out? What will it look like world wide? This, I cannot say.  But what I know is that it will help soften us.  What we do with it will be up to us.  Perhaps this is the universe’s way of planting a seed for us, amongst us.  Or it is us, yearning so much for this worldwide that She is returning.  The Mother of the World.  Certainly the Father as God has been locked up in that cloudy heaven for far too long!  I mean, who wouldn’t be an angry father god in a place like that!  Mother and Father deserve to be next to each other (I think it would be a lot more peaceful, too!).  So let’s give them some space in our own lives.  You have nothing to lose!