Archives for posts with tag: shakti

People say a lot about it…and for the most part, there’s a lot of good information out there. But there are a lot of things said that just aren’t so. Some say you must have a guru, receive diksha, and stuff like that. But they say it because that’s their only experience, so they can’t imagine it any other way.

I didn’t have a guru. I didn’t receive diksha. I didn’t do yoga. I didnt sit in full lotis with back straight, eyes on the nose. I did have a confluence of serendipitous events based on my singular intent to get to the bottom of a few things in my life. These were things that I had buried and needed to resolve that wound up being the switch that turned on the lights. I didn’t have a guide, I did what I was trained as an artist to do: I observed. I’m no different than anyone else except I have been seeking this something “more” that came crashing into my life like a cosmic visitor who made sure nothing would ever be the same ever again.

I see so many searches done on my page that show me that on a daily basis people are just trying to come to grips with their awakening. In the beginning it is a lot to take in. But I think that you were made for this. I also think that we all have existential threads that we need to learn how to cut while awakening is present and strong in us. Doing this will free you up to go from intense awakening to smooth flow. For as hard as it was for me at times, I always knew I was going to make it. I think I chose this at some level. Something in me has the resilience to get through the harder parts of the experience. It’s incredibly personal, so it’s a bit like being laid open like an experiment in dissection…and yet, if you notice, the things that are dissected are never a loss to you. I had this fear….like it was going to destroy me. It was really my fear of change. Over time I learned simple forms of surrender which took me twenty feet into my soul depths, then 40 feet…only to find there was a still deeper surrender as it took me deeper into my psyche to dig out the deeply rooted issues. Not happy with trimming my existential bushes, I dug deep and asked the energy to take me with it. It has always been my teacher and my guide. I am the guru…but that guru is mine. It is your job to recognize the guru in you, too. There is nothing wrong with seeking to figure out how you will do this. My words are just a reminder that you have this. Get curious about yourself.

Today as I was working, there was this channel of information streaming in. Normally I ignore it so I can focus on the busy-work of my day. But it comes, and when it does, when I listen deeply and give myself to it, I can later go and lay on my soft carpeted floor on cushions and give it my full attention. This makes a lover of me, I am not ashamed to admit, and it draws me closer, a great nothingness that is everything, that I am drawn to. And then, I am on fire again.

So as this comes in the moment, let me see if I can explain something that it’s telling me and if you can relate to it.

Kundalini is just an abundance of an energy we call prana, chi (qi), ka, or life force or vital force. It comes when enough blocks are removed to make it possible to let it’s flow increase. I know the Indians say you concentrate on it to imagine drawing it up from the base of the spine, but energetically something “gives way” inside of you that allows for this flow. This isn’t a physical change. It is a change in the structure of your thoughts and your feeling. It’s simple. In fact, way simpler than most people let themselves to be.

Since prana is a force that is also conscious energy, the “structures” that govern it is the subtle energy system. Normaly, we were made for it’s flow, but as humans, it’s stopped. In most people, its a trickle. Once it flows, little can stop it.

The one thing that can stop it is strong negative emotional energy and your thoughts. In the early stages of awakening it seems nothing can stop it, but I have seen that it can be regulated. So if this is so, then the way you can work with this energy is by learning how to be so that the ride is easy instead of hard. This is how it teaches you. You might want to resist it at first, but this is the universal intelligence in all of us, and it has no limitations. The only thing that limits you is you. And for a time, keeping a handle on it may be what you need before going deeper with it. Just follow your instincts and your comfort level. You can, though, go as deep as you wish with it. It is without limit.

Growing up, I had a lot of run-ins with energy. I could have awakened early in life, but the material didn’t move enough. I knew intuitively though that I needed to increase the flow of my inner energy. Interesting things would happen when the flow increased. I often missed what the trick was in increasing the flow. I didn’t realize how I felt was the valve that opened it up. I was too much in my head. I was shown that as this energy increased, my ability to be more aware of numerous streams increased, too.

In an experience at age 18 with a past life as a Native American man who was having a Thunderbeing vision, I found myself swept up into a high level electrical energy of the spirit that made it possible for me to be simultaneously aware of being in four places all at once. Without going into the experience in detail, as the energy rose in me during this vision quest experience in that past life, I was able to be aware that I was alive in numerous aspects or spiritual beings in the vision. I looked out through my eyes as the native man, my own eyes in 1984, the eyes of the thunderbird, and the eyes of the Thunderbeing who was in the storm. I was able to be aware of each location at once. There are exercises that yogis use that do the same thing, and I suspect it’s to achieve the same type of state.

I am telling you this to illustrate the point that as energy increases, so too does consciousness and it’s ability to perceive and take in information incredibly fast and on many channels at once. This only happens when there is enough energy present. I am telling you this to help you be aware of what your potential is and that you can use this to help yourself understand better what’s going on inside you. And if you don’t believe what I have conveyed to you is possible, try imagining the possibility that it is possible, and then do an experiment where you tell yourself that you will allow yourself to open up and be led. Depending on who you are, you might slip right into it, achieving what you thought you were not capable of moments before, or it might need to incubate in you for days or even weeks before you have that surprise “a-ha” moment. Could be, too, that you have it come to you in dream. If it fits you enough, it’s only a matter of time before you encounter it. It’s really about where you put your focus.

So the really great thing I was being shown today was a version of something I think about a lot because I find it so interesting. This is the energetic engine that keeps prana flowing. I’m being shown that it’s these two polarities, things I think of as a cosmic quantity that I might symbolize in my mind as the shakti-shiva or the divine pair. But when these “two” which are really just one wake up inside of you, it wakes up the rest of the cosmos inside of you, too, because this pair is seeded into everything, so it opens you up and gives you access to all that is.

The energy in you is moving through all other things, and since the energy exists outside of space/time, it is everywhere all at once. This means you are also everywhere, too, by extension. I know you aren’t everywhere physically , but take a moment to feel the “god” state alive in this experience and feel how the very fine energy within it is simply not limited. Do you feel that immensity?

Maybe you think you should do something with it. Maybe you think it’s just that way and nothing more can be done. What I find is that as I turn my attention, the energy can “fetch” whatever it is I want or need to know about a good many things. I also need only think about something and it winds up happening. I have been having some very nice adventures in manifesting lately. This reveals to me how the world is really creating using our thoughts. The world is not for or against me, it’s giving me what I am.

Imagination is the gateway for this experience. Beyond the most obvious use of imagination, which is the creation of things, is also the capacity in you to image things that you never knew about before. Imagination becomes a portal for direct knowledge, direct learning, and your ability to feel is what makes it possible for you to relate to whatever information you are picking up on. All of this is experienced not as concepts but as a living reality. Everything has a life. Everything is alive, sentient, even if it’s not physically alive. It is the aliveness of atoms that makes it possible for matter to evolve or to become living like we are.

This aliveness, this livingness is in everything, and it isn’t that our existence as sentient matter is the ultimate state, because it isnt, it’s that everything that exists exists because it is aware. Far from dead matter, atoms have an enduring life of their own, with subatomic particles making up the “cells” of each atoms “body.”

What makes this possible is the sweetness, the uncompromisingly compassionate and ever-present energy on which we are all riding. By sinking into it, you avail yourself of its healing as it straightens out the kinked and blocked places within you. It feels fierce early in awakening only because it’s like trying to fit a thousand gallons through a straw. This is due to the energy body still being restricted or blocked. The more you let it flow into you in your dark places, the more it removes and the more smooth everything within your body and mind gets.

This is to me like the biggest story around. It is for many, a secret. But hidden in your ability to feel (not your emotions…this is your ability to feel and to be more and more sensitive inwardly) is it’s “secret” revealing itself. The less you rationalize with it,the more it will unfold in you.

The more aware you are, the more capable you will be of feeling the remaining blocks in your energy body. As you turn your attention to them, the prana flows. It flows through your attention. This is why we can transmit energy through our eyes. It isn’t that the energy literaly flows through our physical eyes, but that it flows through our attention, and for this energy, a gaze is a form of attention.

It’s quite something knowing that your body is host to trillions and trillions of other lives existing in your body at this moment. It’s true; every cell has it’s own life, even if it lives for only a few weeks, or even days. Every atom, when you see it up close , pulses and vibrates in such a way that it’s a wonder that your body mass doesn’t just slip through everything.

The world’s secrets can open up like a beautiful mountain flower which only you are privy to in that moment. What would you like to see? Would you like to see how we were made, how we came to be here on this planet? It’s surprising to find out that human life as we know it was active long before earth was hospitable, existing in different genomes in different regions of this and other gallaxies. Sound impossible? Go look. Use your minds eye. Or maybe you ant to learn how other cultures existed, or how the light body works, or new forms of technology that use sentient energy as a way to interface with them without the use of dirty fossil fuels, or how you can cancel gravity through high frequency waves, or how some theories in physics only get it partly right. Or, closing your eyes, you can listen to the life of plants and read about their story and how their passions exist in differently seeded ways than our own, a realization that helps to open the mind to the possibilities.

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brain

This time of the year is hard on a lot of people.  I grew up with people who grew dark and troubled in the wintry months. Seems with the time change, then the bad weather, then all of those expectations surrounding the holidays….and…..and….

I know.  I get it.  And yet? Dining on ashes does not solve the depression or sadness conundrum.  What “wrankles” a lot of people is when I say that your joy or happiness is a choice.  But it is.  You have permission now to get upset with me. Go ahead. But keep reading.  It gets better.

The interesting thing is that a positive outlook has been linked to the left brain, while those deeper more blue feelings are tied to the right brain.  Who would have thought, right?  And yet, what I know about the left brain based on years of study both on a professional level and in observing myself in meditation and awakening, is that its a really simple hemisphere.  We know this now, which is that the left brain handles simple linear processing-type things.  Its good at lists, creating strategies, things like that.  Oh, and its also where our feelings of positivity exist, too!  The right brain sees a much bigger picture, but it also has a hard time feeling bright.  So we need to know how to give that side, which happens to bloom in awakening (the right brain-seat of kundalini shakti) a little boost. We might actually begin to feel like feeling good is just a simplistic way of looking at things.  And maybe so, but you know what?  It beats the heck out of the alternative, am I right?

Knowing your essential self is also knowing that YOU are in control of your feelings and not something that has been stuffed down deep inside of you.  Now it might seem that going about bright and shiny all day while feeling like things aren’t all just perfect inside is somehow dishonest, but I tell you that until the moment comes when you can solve whatever the wrinkles are within you, which would you prefer to do, dine on ashes, or be happy?  The reality remains that some things you cannot in this moment fix.  But really, does it make any sense AT ALL to allow whatever lies beneath that you cannot in this moment get to to get you down? If I did that, I would just throw my hands up because the truth is…..we all have piles of junk (some more than others) to deal with.  If we let that issue alone get to us…..why even go on? Why get up in the morning? Right?  A week ago I got down about something related to my family.  I found my body crashing and burning.  I felt through this hard place in me and I knew that in due course it was going to get healed. Everything like this has seemed to do so as if according to a given order.  I just let kundalini work its magic.  In the meantime, I wait.  I do!  I wait and I am faced with how to make this inner space happier and more enjoyable.  And it’s funny; when I do that, everything turns around for me!

Having been in the depths of the Dark Night Of The Soul for an extended period some years ago, also, I am all for the buffet of happiness.  And the thing is, YOU can change your physiology so that you produce all of the necessary chemistry to allow that reality to come over you physiologically.  While waiting for your inner self to clarify and clear, it might as well be an order of happiness and joy.  And add a little extra love in your heart, too.

Today I had a critique with my students of their work.  While we were between pieces, I described how a woman learned that in order to combat her anxiety over performing or speaking in front of people, she discovered that in order to change how she felt, she could actually adopt a physical posture that told her mind that she was….confident.  And she found that whenever she was not confident or happy, she found that she could….fake it.  Even if she felt a certain way, certain body postures would counter the body chemistry that was being produced in her body. And it worked great for her. It was so good, she has gone on to tell people that you can basically, in the words of Susanna from art class, “fake it until you make it.”

Now I know that this can bring up the sense that maybe we are just being dishonest or  somehow notgenuine.  But look, its possible that some people can be so gripped by an emotion that they will do anything to get out of it.  Anxiety and depression have reached epic proportions in our country. And you know what?  I have found that our feelings are entirely a result of some condition that we have at some point made a choice about.  I know; you may not have chosen that shitty childhood. None of us feel that way, but I have had to face the reality in my spiritual work that actually, I really DID choose that shitty childhood.  I chose it actually to overcome something really important to heal and it seems that some of the early events in my life, I knew about upon entering this world. I’m not even saying that bad stuff is your fault.  I’m saying that if you could see and know the reason behind why some things happen, it would probably inspire you in the weirdest of ways to know that some of the hardest things contain the seeds of our salvation as human beings.  It really isn’t even what you thought it was….which is kind of like a wonderful surprise gift you get only at the very end of a hard feeling you are getting ready to heal.  It really only matters until it no longer matters, and when its gone, its gone.  Gone!  Now tell me, wouldn’t you like to get you some healing like that?  Well, its within the reach person on the planet.

I know though that many wont agree, and all I can say is that someday, somewhere, when you see into the layer I have reached, then on that day you will remember this little bit of writing that seemed so messed up and backwards and realize what it was I was talking about.  You see, until the error is healed in us, we cannot hope to extricate ourselves from it, not even a relationship which is the same as our last one. You have to heal that stuff inside…..

So I ask you, again, while you wait for the healing time to come, which do you prefer, hurricanes and lightening or something a little more enjoyable?

So given the mad ramble I have put you through, I will actually do something that I often don’t do, which is to post some great ways to deal with the winter blues and your emotions which might be a little on the hard side.  That’s next post.  For the time being, I wish you joy and happiness because….well….the alternative is really no fun at all.

God-dess Bless.

-P.

waterish

How do I tell them

that you dwell in all of the smallest

and thus through the All?

How do I tell them how You exist everywhere

in everything

utterly ubiquitous

seemingly silent

except for how present you are?

How do I tell them

that the path to initiation

is by way of joining the

Two Currents

of thought

feeling

brain

mind

and archetype,

and that nothing less

will reveal

your presence

to them?

How do I tell them

that their religions have been poor substitutes

to the glory

wonder

and awe

that is you?

How do I tell them?

How do I utter your secrets?

The problem

is there are no secrets.

We have chosen to close our eyes

our inner-seeing eyes

whilst looking outward

through eyes made

of gross matter only

chosen that as the truth

forgetting that it was the Creation

not the soul that inhabits that Creation.

Who can be bothered to seek deeply

only to find

everything is a prop

a stage set for a story whose plot contains

a diminished message

while a deeper truth abides

curled inside of everything.

It takes real inquiry

honesty

and so simply

the doors do open…..

To know the One

focus your attention

on the smallest place within you.

At the smallest level is where

the One rushes in

and inhabits all of us

quietly

and without our permission

or knowledge

like ancestral DNA

whose voice can be heard

beneath the soft sigh of imperishability.

It is below normal awareness…..

its power is so strong

that once awakened,

you should be ready

for a new life to form

filled with meditation and practice

to working to release your inner resistance

to the work it will do in you….

thus the old life can change so much.

With the two currents awakened in your awareness

you can join two “eyes” of your being

into the one eye

which initiates a flow all through you

and undoes you

that you might know

see

feel

and abide

in your riches.

It is near the third eye where the currents

flow one into the other

naturally

continuously

and the only one who has not known this

has been your concious awareness.

This is the point or merging

opposite forces

into one

for the sake of Creation

the Dance

that returns and supports

all creations.

This is the rebirth

the ressurection

the awakening

to a new life

as though the flesh were dead

and which is now alive,

more alive now than ever.

Here,

mysteries can be known

felt

experienced

like a contiguous map

or landscape

uncompounded

consistent

whose golden thread

runs through everything

and can be illuminated

when you bring

both sides

of reason

and irrational

imagination

concrete

the warm

cold

full

void

into unity.

When these twin forces merge

everyone experiences

what can only be described

as an extreme state of bliss

that is orgasmic

and which releases

this energy all through the body

to heal

cleanse

and return it back to love

so that this bliss

is used for larger purposes

like enlightenment

illumination

and ressurection.

Here is where it begins

a fine thread

you grasp

that takes you through itself.

No images exist here

but pure spirit

will carry you to worlds

beyond this one

but straddles all realities.

The thread will take you to every answer

your mind seeks

all origins

and being.

A vast library is built of this thread

the one living invisibly within us all,

threaded through all thought,

all action,

all events,

all matter

and all that was

or shall be.

You shall inherit this

upon Initiation.

Touch this Presence at its smallest

within you

and you will know it

outside of you

through all things

for we are all connected by this thread

of golden awareness

linked to imperishability

and new life.

You do not need to believe anything.

This exists before all dogma

all belief

and will correct all wrong thought

when you submit yourself to It long enough

to wear away the stones cast into your heart

and sou…..

There are so many hurdles

Errors which we each have created

lifetimes of them

and yet

the world of them will come toppling down

when we each enter more deeply into this force

that is love

that is your emanation

your presence

your life

within us.

Join the two

open your whole being

let it invade you

and undo you.

You needn’t be afraid

for each of us who are already awake

will be standing silently within you

as your eyes open

to this new world…..

Your vision will slowly clarify

as you are healed

of your error

and you will see clearly

more and more

like swimming slowly

up from murky depths

to the light.

This can take a lifetime to clear

or only moments

and when the Two are joined

a current will begin to move in you

restoring you

to the original state.

Here,

you use both reason

and imagination

like a man and woman

hand in hand

in close union

with respect and care for the other

left and right brain

Shiva and Shakti

Yang and Yin

together

nonantagonistic

moving evenly in peace

which produces

immense pearls of bliss,

further healing you from past error

and illusions.

These things were once spoken secretly

behind stone walls

and only to the ‘elect.’

It is time

that we see

that it is time

for this teaching to be opened up for all to know

the good new spread far and wide…..

but who shall have the eyes to see?

Those who are ready

can inherit it

but only by joining irrationality

feeling

fluidity

with the rational

and solid

for the new Arrangement

to take form,

the mystical marriage

of the Alchemists.

This is the only Initiation

that has ever mattered.

Who then shall hear?

When then shall see?

Kundal goddess

She was taken out of the equation

a divine light

which darkened our spiritual skies

we called her presence pagan

or worse; consort of the devil.

Why did we do this?

What were we thinking?

We we mad?

Amnesiac?

Those dry canals

could not stand

to feel

the full force of their being

their intellect

along with their emotion

their physicality

love

their sex

because they were ashamed

and fearful

because when the goddess entered the house

it was lit aflame

and gave birth to worlds

We fear this in ourselves

until we do not.

How much longer will you hold back the force of truth

in your own body

your awareness?

The merging into the two

is an act so intimate

but is done without anyone there….

a great silence

an emptiness

full of fire and flow….

a mystery

I am here to initiate you into

a mystery I seek to show.

We will go mad without HER in our lives

look at the march of Christianity and Islam

they forgot their sacred feminine force

and have gone mad.

Its been one conquest after another

without her presence adding balance and compassion

We have invaded, taken, stolen, destroyed

all in the name of divine providence.

This has been done in the name of the angry

frustrated

lonely

man-god

and his clannish club….

I am bringing back her breath in me

I am bringing her breath back to the world.

I am turning back the great spring of our awareness

to bring back the old wisdom that kept us safe

sane

and sound.

Time to open the halls of heaven

time to bring the Goddess to her God

in the Bridal Chamber of the soul.

serveimage

You might think that my words on the sacred two are about tantra and are thus sexual in nature.  I have had friends make comments about my poetry and writing as being about sex.  But that would be  a mistake.

Most often, when I write about the “two” I am actually writing about the twin forces contained within awakening.  This was what Jesus spoke about when he said “I am one with the father and the mother.”  Problem is, mainstream Christian dogma wrote the “mother” part out so that the religious experience became an all-male club.  The Hindu, though, along with the Taosists, recorded it rightly: kundalini, or life force, the Tao, is known as twin forces that move through the body and awareness as a potentiating force of both healing and radical change.  To show how powerful this force is, it is possible to do more healing work in ten minutes with this force alive in your than in ten years of standard talk therapy.  Part of the energy is said to be sexual.  And here is what is so important, right along with the twin-thing; the force of awakening is like a carefully controlled stream of water being so carefully tended, is allowed to overflow its tight bounds and allows for other water and other new bounds to enter in.  The flow grows, the flow breaks down old barriers.  It is sexual, yes, but it is creative, it is mental, it is physical, it is emotional, it is ego, it is intellect, it is all that we ARE. By allowing our energy to flow as one varied current, we can actually catch a glimpse of what we can be if we become less compartmentalized and controlled.  We return to a primordial state which I describe as a return to the Garden.  This is us, you see….

All that we ARE.  So my poetry?  It is about THIS. And yes, it is cast in the form of pure adoration.  This is significant and important because the “two” are not themselves really separate.  They are in truth ONE, when you experience them within your awareness, but they pull apart to form what seems to be two in the etheric body structure of the Ida and Pengala channels, and in so doing, they become a powerful creative force.  This force exists in every single person on the planet.  So when this force is liberated deep within ourselves, the twin force of kundalini releases, it is said, the Shakti and Shiva currents through the body.

Like a plug into the cosmic, we plug into the universe with a blast up the spine. Never are we ever the same after this.  And I make them adore one another like lovers because of HOW closely they work with each other in the body when you become aware of them. You cannot have one without the other.  I found that I could allow the “two” to grow in strength by allowing them to come closer and closer to one another through nothing except my own focus and awareness on my own process of energetic flow through my body and upward through the chakras and my spine.  Out of these two, there is birthed an even finer form of energy that is the core of the Christ, or Cosmic Consciousness.  Awakening is akin to conception, what the early Christians mention as “begetting” as a spiritual practice (the only remnants we have of this teaching are extant in the gnostic writings of the Nag Hammadi).  For the bulk of Christianity, the subtlety of what Jesus had to say was largely lost where his core apex teachings were concerned.  He was a man who spoke in pictures and parables to people who were drop-dead literal in their understanding and approach.  But you think I feel the Christ?  I feel what HE felt in his life and what he sought to get his followers to know.  This is also the same force that all yogis and pilgrims have felt down through time.  This is a HUMAN experience, you see, not religious or dogmatic.

I pay homage to these things.  I pray, I look, I long, I breath, and I find healing through them.  Always always, as they turn turn around the other.  And yes, I am here to state emphatically that you cannot have God the Father without Goddess The Mother.  Anything less is ignoring the truth that will one day stare straight at you like looking down the barrel of a cosmic gun ready to shoot you through and through with truth, murdering your lies and your false belief.  We all hold lies in ourselves, and most of us do not know they are lies.

Strong words, I know.  But I am through pussy-footing around.

Time to bring back the Her to the Him.  And that is what I am doing.  My words. they are about the She as much as the He.  they are at once religious in feeling but shunning dogma and false belief.  They are also fanciful, playful, fun, and passionate.  Just like every good love story should be.  So there you go.  Sexual energy, along with the REST of your energy is healing.  Subsume or hide your sexual energy out of some feeling of shame or guilt and you lose a strand of your own healing.  And what does that get you?  More repression and sickness.

So why did we strip the man-god from his woman?  Why do you think we did that? I mean, really, what do you think was beneath all of that? Fear? Short-sightedness?  There may be many reasons, but in a moment we can change all of that by choosing differently.

The Goddess joins with her God right here inside of me.  It informs me, heals, and innervates.  It is for me the way Home.  And what is this?  It is merely a joining of all the opposite ends of things in the universe using a glorious and beautiful form of cosmic short-hand.  ALL opposites are thus strung along the invisible string of the Creator….IN OUR AWARENESS.  And that is the core of all religious feeling.  So back to the poetry….

IMG_1648

In it

lies

the three

potent

foretelling

compelling.

Two divided

return to union

creating a third

like some cosmic family.

 

Left brain unites to right brain

see how Shakti and Shiva are merged?

It is the same

the world bubbles up with this

the ubiquity of union

of disparate

becoming familiar

exploding in creation.

 

The distant stars draw us forward

into an ancient

but recognizable vibration

where the massive

unites with the small

where the dark joins the light

where the cold is embraced by heat

and the yin knows the yang.

Forever like this

for this is how all cosmic mind is and shall ever be.

Turning one into the other

within each and every single particle

that exists.

In you

in me

in all of us

as we make sense of this

and give up trying

and embrace the mystery

and thus sighs the universe

in its ecstasy

in our union.

7fb6b5d780adc694b4946978ea101bfbTwo currents reside in your awareness, your body, and the universe.  We call them yin and yang, Shakti and her Shiva.  This is so because when we let go and allow them to be in us, it results in bliss.  To do that means letting both sides flow.  Restrict one, you effect both.

So let me suggest very certainly to you that we humans do not realize just how much we have choked off the yin side, the feminine in us.  For centuries.  This has had a big impact on us, but like frogs which boiled in water, the effect was gradual and we just never noticed it. We do not notice it even now.  We just don’t know how things are changed by having more of the subtler and more fluid flow of the yin in us.  But when you do this, when you let this side flow in you, it has huge effects for you.  The feminine current in your flows up one side of your body, the left and then flips when it reaches your brain or crown.  This sends the current of the feminine flow into your right brain.  Learning about HOW the right brain feels is knowing this flow. the right brain is not the linear processor that the left is.  It is not limited.  It can take in VAST amounts of things and details.  Research into brain function has shown that when people have left brain functioning impaired, they experience mystical states, develop incredible visual memory and can do incredible calculations that are on par with “Idiot Savants” (and is a term I find distasteful).  It seems the left brain serves as a controlling filter for the right which has no such limits. And isn’t this so very feminine?  I mean, who else is able to take a spark and turn it into a world, a baby, in nine months?  Amazing when you think about it.  Well, in a very similar way, a conceptual and feeling way, the feminine or yin in you can achieve similar results.  To do this, though, you HAVE to let her flow. Balancing the flow can lead to orgasmic energy within you.  This is a very good thing because of how healing it is.

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Let yourself FEEL.  Don’t be afraid of your feelings.  Many people try to control their feelings for fear that they wont be able to keep a grip on themselves.  I say let yourself go.  Let yourself go some, and let the carpet unroll.  Sure, in the beginning things might feel chaotic, but a curious things happens when you give yourself the freedom to feel; you return to a kind of point of stasis.  For everyone this point is different.  After years of living a controlled rigid emotional life in some respects, you might need some significant unrolling. So let it go.  Eventually, once the rougher energy is worked out of you, a more peaceful land will emerge.  And the plus is you will most likely have learned how important it is to cultivate a more balanced self that includes this other side you have been ignoring.  The great thing is it can actually lead you when you are uncertain of where this will all end up. Really!  But allow yourself to flow.  Allow yourself to not always have the answers.  Allow yourself to FEEL the answers.  Some answers are arrived at through non-rational means.  Give yourself the opportunity to feel this and do this and be this.  Your mind wont be thrown into disarray, and if it does initially, the ship is merely learning to right itself.  Trust your process, and welcome the divine feminine, the yin, the right brain, into your life.  Sometimes the best way to solve a problem is through non-rational means.  Some things are just that kind of a mystery. the left side wont ever be able to work that issue out in any meaningful way because of how it is built.

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So instead of thinking it, you will FEEL it. It will tend to happen that you can do odd things like BREATHE in peace and contentment.  The left brain says “WHAT???”  but the right brain smiles knowingly.  “But of course, that makes purrrfect sense!” she says.  And it does.  No way you could ever really breathe in the universe through your nose and yet, it happens because with the feminine, these things are commonplace. Letting HER show you the magic way is one really great way to expand and potentiate your consciousness whether you are a man or woman.  As a man, just being near this kind of spiritual fire is real nice.  What will YOU discover with this world within your reach?

Lets get honest.  Even in the most illuminated and seemingly spiritually advanced traditions, there is still a great deal of male chauvinism.  I hear people say how lovely it is that Shakti is conceived as the force of kundalini itself and must slowly rise up the body, refining herself as she goes in order to ready herself for her union with her consort, Shiva, resting in resplendent perfection in the crown chakra.  Or how, in images of Yab-Yum the male figure is the deity and the feminine aspect is his consort.  If you go to Wikipedia you will see this expressed.  In one fail swoop, the cosmos is rendered an all-male deity club where women must refine themselves to be worthy and where the women are merely consorts.  It is a fact that both forces of masculine and feminine rose within me AS THE FORCE that IS kundalini when awakening took place beginning in 2006.  The intense energy living in me was the locus of the union of these two forces now vibrantly alive in my body.  I was one with the father and mother.  They were one within me. It was I who had to refine myself, to catch up.  Both sides of the energy cycle had much to teach me, both the north and south poles of the vibrant nimbus of energy now licking like sensual flames all over me.  But we speak of the feminine having to refine herself and no one so much as bats an eyelash.  Does anyone bother to stop and look at these stories and realize that all the god stories and goddess stories are merely stories about us written large against the spiritual skies of our inner world?  Who realizes that when we began looking to see a deity in the clouds or sky that we had defacto set that deity apart from ourselves, placing a VERY frustrated and angry and probably sexually frustrated bearded male god in a untennable situation. Well of course he would smite and destroy.  Who wouldn’t? And where on earth is the softening aspects of the feminine in all of this?  Without her we have had ten thousand years of stiffened hardened madness.  And look at how this has played out in humanity. So the feminine inside each of us, EACH of us, is vital but so is our awareness of them…..

As long as we continue to do this, we continue to turn a blind eye to our own divinity because what works here on the small level also works on the larger spiritual levels as well. The curious thing about belief (and its brother named bias) is that you wont experience a thing that you have barriers erected for. This is how for centuries people have seen women as lesser to men, essentially like cattle to be traded and sold in marriage.  Little more than slaves.

This is changing in a big way.  While change has been gradual and perhaps too slow for some, it has nonetheless created a change that does not show signs of changing back or reverting anytime soon.  Yes, we  still have the throwbacks, but on balance, things are better than they have ever been. And they can continue to keep getting better.

Here is my contribution….

Below is an image from the Hindu tradition of Shiva playing his flute to his consort, Parvati, a manifestation of Shakti.  Shiva has the nimbus around his head in green, but Shakti does not. Perhaps she is having to refine herself, her energy, before she has the same radiance as her consort Shiva.  As someone who reads auras, I can tell you that the energy surrounding women is every bit as brilliant as that around men. In some cases, it is stronger in women than in men. This makes sense since women will bear life and will have to carry this new life with its own energy sheath in a protective manner.  Having a strong bio-energetic field could have its benefits.  I show you the image just as I came across it and then the image that I changed to include a nimbus for Shakti. Hers is violet, which suggest intuition.  It is a nice warm color yet very spiritual, a nice counterpoint to Shiva’s halo.  I hope that you use this image to help raise awareness in a simple way that BOTH of the sexes are equivalent.  Please feel free to do so with attribution.  A nice remix of sorts.  It is a small thing, but is another drop of change that we all need if you ask me.

Shakti:Shiva

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I have written extensively about this on other blogs, and I am now putting it here as it is a very important aspect to where we are headed as a species.  This is not a spiritual thing, a nice idea to hold or to cleave to.  It is part of the inner workings of the divine cosmos, the air, the atoms, the vibrations of all energy. What we have come to call the yin and yang, the masculine and feminine seen in myriad forms from Shakti and Shiva to the Goddess and the Horned God or Cernunonos, these images express an infinitely broad aspect of all reality, all being, all experience.  What a physicist describes as an energy pattern of positive moving to negative, the Hindu describes as the natural continuum of energy between these seeming opposites.  The images, the symbols, are merely that, and yet, within the electromagnetic spectrum wherein our own experience rides, we feel these currents as the bedrock of our very experience.  You can make this as personal or as impersonal as you want to; the presence of these forces are so broad, they are simply everywhere and are everything.

 

The reality is that even as males and females are seen as distinct, they both carry the chemistry of the other within them.  the most manly of men produce estrogen and women rely on some testosterone for normal bodily function and the regulation of libido.  We all have oxytocin in our bodies, that interesting hormone that is known to play an important role in pair bonding and family unity.  It is also a neurotransmitter (true!) and we all have it.  In just the same way, consciousness carries aspects of both masculine and feminine perhaps in less rigidly formed ways within us.  When kundalini rose in me I was aware of two energies that were in perfect union and that the very force of this energy was not one of the other, but BOTH.  The bliss from this force was the union.  When I pulled awareness away from this perfection in union, bliss ceased and I became really quite ordinary. Luckily, it took a very strong emotional force or “constriction” to cause this to happen.  We are, whether we know it, top to bottom, operating on this seemingly “dual” energy which appears to be in all truth only workable when it is in union, when they work dynamically together.

 

So look at our cultures as a subset of this union concept.  If these “two” are everywhere, top to bottom, then you will see it reflected in everything, including a culture. To understand how this union of these opposites is at work at the individual level, you can look at the culture.  Look at the institutions, the laws, the rules, the taboos, the beliefs.  All of these will be a perfect mirror for the body of the dimension as a whole.  For this dimension, it is a culture or a group.  How we reflect or are aware of these two determines how they are expressed.

 

Step back and look at humanity across the globe and you will see a real slant towards paternalism that has been going on four many thousands of years.  The Goddess, the yin, has been swept under the rug in our awareness.  Women have been persecuted in big and small ways, limited, marginalized in big and small ways. This effect has happened on the individual level and it has happened to ALL of us.  Even women. Over time, even women themselves have come under the beliefs and biases that have kept them limited.  This, though, is beginning to change.  As each individual person, regardless of their own sexual orientation physically or psychologically, begins to step out of this old pattern, we will, and are, seeing change take place.  Yes, this change has been slow, and yet it has been steady.  People are waking up to how things CAN be and the Goddess is returning.

 

There is a ways to go.  We know this.  And yet, we will continue to get there and as we do, we will literally build a collective bank of energy that helps to bring the unfathomable force that is the feminine in the universe to bear in our world. You simply cannot believe the changes that will take place as we make the change individually within.  You may not believe that it is possible to change things in this way, that it is akin to thinking things into being, and yet, in truth, this is what we do all the time. All great movements begin as ideas. All creation begins with the act of INTENTION. I know that in my own experience, in my own life, post awakening, that the things I have been able to accomplish, the greatest of them, did not involve me lifting a finger.

 

It is interesting, as a side note, to mention the lesser-known Gnostic texts in which Jesus is speaking about a process that takes place that he called the “kingdom.” In it, he maps out the very process of awakening.  He didn’t use the Hindu language set, but he used one that is entirely consistent with kundalini.  But as those who know who are awakened, kundalini is not a religion or philosophy, but is a HUMAN experience that happens in every culture, we just have different names for it, a different language or vocabulary for it.  He explained that the singular self knows resurrection by way of the presence of the Mother and Father within.  This was also called Pistis, Pistis Sophia, and the Holy Ghost.  they were all used interchangeably enough in these texts that we know what it was they were talking about.  He described this as the one being two and the two then becoming one.  You begin as a person who seems to be a singular person but then awaken to the reality of these two forces within called the Mother and Father.  These then are in union and thus become one.  He explained that you resolve all division within yourself to achieve this.  To do that, you resolve any hitches in your awareness that are helping to keep the awareness of this subtle force at bay within you.  Then, after this, one enters into what he and others called The Bridal Chamber.  This was so called because of the bliss that the union of these two forces created in awareness.  In kundalini, this is the bliss of the union of Shakti and Shiva.  I feel this force everyday, all day, if I allow myself to simply remain perfectly perched on the crest of the wave that makes it all possible.  I remain in union with them, and their union creates a third force, the Christ.  And Jesus was very much about helping birth Christs.  And this Christ, while embodied in a man’s teachings, is not something that is male or female.  It is the very bliss of union that creates a transcendent state.  It is this transcendent state that he explained brought on something he described as “When you are destroyed.”  This is consistent with what the Hindus call ego death.  This is the severing of the head which is shown in many images in Hindu culture.  This is the loss of the usual sense of self as Kali severs the head and attains dominion over the self.  This is symbolic language for what kundalini shakti, expressed as the feminine force coming into awareness, does to us.  We become less mental, we become more like her; intuitive.  Yes, Kali is a severe expression, but it also expresses the inevitability of the process whereby a true breakthrough is only possible with the severe action that kundalini will bring to you as you go through the loosening of the bonds that you have to your old configuration…..your head….your ego.

 

Jesus then says something important, and key.  He says that once this happens, when you bid the mountain to move, it will move. You do not MOVE the mountain, you simply use your intent to make it so.  This sounds miraculous, and yet, miracles follow many who are awakened.  I know that for me, minor miracles follow me on a daily, weekly and monthly basis.  And it might seem miraculous, but in truth, it is part of a larger understanding of how the universe works.

 

So yes, we can sit still and bid great change to take place.  It depends on your capacity for knowing how to work with this energy, and the locus of its effect emerges from you through sheer will or intent and if nothing stands in the way (via bias or hidden belief) then it will happen. So yes, we have way more power than any of us might want to realize or admit.  But we do.  With it comes great responsibility because as the energy gets higher and knowing increases, there is a great potential for falling flat on your face and building huge karmic entanglements.  I know.  What I though was just the universe bringing me things I later realized was my own presence on this wave and I was causing it all to happen.  Instead of believing it was the universe, I had to realize the causal relationship between intent and event.  When we can get this honest, we can also save ourselves a lot of error.  Sure, it IS the universe bringing you this in a sense, but there is no one granting you something because some deity decides that it is right for you to have it.  It doesn’t work that way, and this is important to realize as we grow up energetically.  We were given this huge gift of free will, and it is this that makes us creators. Godlings. Now don’t let that go to your head, but focus on the important part, which is anything in life where there is great responsibility. With this freedom is also responsibility.  Now own it.  Owning it will also cause you, most likely, to look at your own shit.  I know that is a bit of an indelicate term, but it is one that hits it hard and clearly with no equivocation.  It is the dross that we need to remove.  And here we have great opportunity to make huge change in less and less time.  Like a snowball rolling down a hill, this process can gain size and momentum very quickly.  It is, I observe, growing day by day. Three weeks ago I was listening to a broadcast on women in politics at the state level and it was so hopeful to me to hear these women speaking about their concerns and how these were translating into shifts in policy.  These women were all looking at the big picture and asking what would the results be for everyone when a certain policy is changed.  they wanted to see the biggest benefit not to key individuals, but for the whole.  This is huge and can literally begin reforming our political landscape. Twenty years ago, the closest that a broadcast would come to actually covering things like this were when women would speak about what they would do if they ran for office.  Well, now they ARE in office in greater numbers and the change is taking place.

 

The entrance of the goddess in all her forms is coming, and we can give her a warm landing spot by simply holding her presence in each of us.  We all have her in us.  Me, a masculine man has learned that this force does indeed live inside of him.  She humanizes me both as a force that is part of my psychological makeup and also operates at a level that appears almost archetypal.  She has begun to turn around inside of me enough for me to experience her as a definite presence that has aided me in moments of great healing.  Without her in us, we are bereft of the very tools we need to become more whole. This, though, has not changed me into some sort of androgyne.  It has made me more aware of the importance of the feminine current in all things.  It has made me more aware of how she fits, how she works in all things and how important her presence is in ALL of us.

 

The biggest way to effect change is to simply BE the change.  How do you go about doing this?  You do it moment by moment.  Be aware of your thoughts and feelings.  Do you think first or act first? Which side of the dynamic are you working from moment to moment?  Are you overly harsh, do you plunge into things without exercising your intuition?  Or do you wind up feeling too observant of the range of possibilities and thus feel stuck unable to decide? Being able to balance all of these traits will bring you to a place of balance within….a kind of unbalanced balance.  If you are a male, being able to soften your edges with HER can be a huge benefit as it will make you more compassionate, and great leaders are also compassionate.  Despots have no compassion, and people fear them.  Do you want to rule in love or fear? The notion that a soft approach wont work because people only understand force is one notion that is erroneous. We are showing how this can change the balance of power over and over.  As countries seek the old paradigm to accomplish their political ends, more and more people will grow tired of it and demand a change.  Gradual at first, but the snowball grows.  As I soften, as I am more compassionate, I am able to relate to my children in an entirely different way.  I can now offer them opportunities that I could not just five years ago.  My daughter is now being nurtured by a man who is much more aware and cognizant of his actions, and she will grow up having known a father who is more considered, who is more balanced, and she will go on to year for a mate who will more closely follow the man I have become.  Because that is just how raising children works out.  Daughters often seek what is familiar from their early lives in some fashion just as sons do. As a result, I am rewriting the future not just for me, but for my daughter and for every person both she and I come into contact with.  Imagine if a million people were to do this.  The effects are huge.  A small pebble dropped in the water has far-reaching ripples.

 

Maya Angelou in a talk a few years ago spoke of how small things become big things and she did this by telling a story about her life growing up.  She was sent to her grandparents to live with them, and the small things they did for their family had long reaching effects later in those children’s lives.  It was really a beautiful story that only Maya can tell in the same way.  And she was then able to speak to others about the power of such small kindnesses and shifts that we make and inspired entire audiences to consider, if only for a moment, what their own individual actions might do to bring change.  We ARE the change.

 

So the answer, if there is to be one, is not in letting the pendulum to swing far into the goddess realm, but to once and for all seek a balance between the two.  Otherwise, we just keep the polarizing effect of the swing of energy to keep going on.  We do this by simply making the decision to do things differently and to not behave as victims.  It is easy to sit back and say how bad men have been to women as if the men now are involved in making the same inroads to persecution that have happened in the past.  As long as we put the sins of the past on the present, we merely carry those sins forward and keep the wounds fresh. Men will feel defensive and under the gun and be less capable of finding that shining self that is beyond all the dramas of the past.  Likewise, women will teach themselves again the way toward power is in using their prior victimhood as a source of power, a great shield against which they protect themselves from the world and for what is.  We all wind up poorer for it. For this to work, it requires honesty, bravery, and a lot of compassion and a willingness to let the past be the past.

 

 

When we are able to do this, we literally write a new script for the future.  NOW. We let the past feelings go and begin identifying with a new way to be. All of this takes great strength and compassion and bravery. And we wont be perfect at it always.  But in time, we will see women who are coming into entirely new experiences of the Goddess within simply due to the past limits they and the rest of society placed on them.  They will be less afraid, and will explore the great depths of HER more. As a man with the vision to see HER presence, I can tell you that there is so much more we have yet to uncover and experience.  The awakening of the goddess within will also serve to bring out the god within each person also. The frailties of the man will be healed at an ever-increasing rate as men also become less afraid to express their fundamental natures or essential selves.

 

John Farnham once wrote a song entitled “You Are The Voice” in which he explains that we have the power to write what we want to write, to change the world….the power is in our hands.  Yours. Mine. Hers.  His.  I promise you, as you step upon this path, there is no end to how deep all of this goes.

Nemasté

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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