Archives for posts with tag: Law of Attraction

It is so easy to wrap an awakening in myths and ideas about what we think it is.  There is a lot written about it from other times, cultures, mind sets.  All of it has a lot of good stuff.  Inevitably, though, even the awakened come up against the limits of what we ourselves can allow ourselves to know or consider.  It is a cognitive box. Breaking out of it is what this energy, this shift, can offer.  All of us.

In my awakening, soul connections have been part of the process.  I have karma to work through and this is the time that it seems it is going to get done.  The problem though is that in the community that speaks the most to these connections as twin flames and twin souls, there is a lot of disinformation.  I call it this because I don’t know what else to call it.  It is itself a cognitive box.  Lacking any better explanation, we come up with something that matches what it feels like.  Connecting in this way is pure bliss.  Yes.  But assuming it is because it is meeting the other half of you is a mistake.  What this idea does is it masks, I feel, what is actually at work.  Walk with me for a minute.

So if you have had this, you know how events have such a wild way of happening?  Where do you think those events emerge from?  Are they coming from God?  Or is it possible that they are coming from you?  I have had so many of these events happen to me, literally hundreds big and small that what I have been able to observe that when the energy, the bliss of this experience was at its peak, these synchronicities tended to happen in profusion.  Each and every time, this happened.  There is a correlation with the energy and my thoughts.  I do feel that what is happening is that we are dropping into a flow of energy, creative energy that is our birthright.  This bliss IS this creative energy.  We say it is libidinous, which is a fancy way of saying it feels sexual.  It does.  But it is more than just that.  It is sensual, lovely, freeing, and it is the very thing that melts us, that breaks up our inner blocks.  It frees us.  And isn’t this the essence of creativity?  Creativity almost always makes us see things differently.  Think about it.  Almost all new ideas shift how we see things.  It is not JUST what people are doing, it is the energy fueling it.  A product results….maybe some new discovery, some new form, some new piece of art, music, or institution.  Creativity is in every corner of our lives.  So this energy, expressed as bliss, which I say I experience as creative in its root, is literally making events all around me come alive.  But wait….if this is not being divinely guided, but is just my own ability to manifest supercharged, then it means that instead of it having some grand design, it could simply be what I feel in my heart as a possibility to happen, and carried by the energy, it does?  From thinking about something only to see a bumper sticker a second later that echoes it, ir I bump into someone who tells me about a story that helps to put me on the track of some new wrinkle in my work that I have been thinking about that day?  Over and over and over, these events all happen.  Some would say they are “fated” but they all cohere to my own thoughts.  If there is nothing blocking that block in me, the event happens. Simple.  So maybe this is just our normal ability to manifest now super-charged.

And yes, you feel bliss with this Other, whom you call twin.  But have you ever looked into it to know why?  All of the universe, we are told, is about like attracting like.  When we attract along a certain vibration, those vibrations naturally reinforce each other.  And the flow of soul energy is increased.  Bliss results.  Over and over I have seen this in my life and I have seen it in others, too.  We are now awake, yes, the flow is now instigated.  We are forever changed.  Forever.  Get around more like-minded kind and the vibration naturally reinforces itself.  It is I think an important consideration.  What happens if there is something in that vibration that is karmic from the past.  It could generate really powerful fear too.  DO you think that this could be the concept behind the “runner” experience?  Honestly, I think so.  We feel this bliss, but we then also feel this fear….and this fear?  It is the karma we share and the bulk effect of what this karma has meant to use on a soul level.  And what is this karma except a turning away from all that is true in us?  Bear in mind, I am only talking about the negative karma.  Yes, there is also positive karma.  Yes!  Thank goodness!  But the positive karma does not trip us up.  In fact, it holds us up.  But the negative stuff can cause us to nose-dive, am I right? So until that karmic knot is resolve there will be challenges!  So we deal with them.  The knot is there in you and me because we have set it aside and not dealt with it.  We pushed it down.  What we ignore is what persists.  And sometimes, the knot is nothing more than a strong emotion that we did not feel or embrace completely.  We instead denied it and there it has lain since the beginning.  But when you release such a block…..WHOOOSH!  Boom.  Done.  Gone. And for me, when it is gone, it is GONE!  Whatever hung me up is just…..no longer an issue.  And it doesn’t make a lot of sense!  You would think that what we think and feel is so easy to access, sift and work through….but alas, our bodies show every sign of STORING this stuff in our bodies.  Yes, in the body, right along with the current of prana that makes up the sheaves or layers the Hindu call the koshas.  This is what makes us like a multilayered being and the clearing that happens in awakening sweeps through each of these vibrational layers so that there are up to, they say, five cleansings or total clearings of each chakra before the process is largely completed, removing all of this stored pent-up material.  But until these knots that tie to negative karma are resolved, they too draw us, attract us without being aware of what it is for the simple reason that this material is not always conscious.  It has been stuffed down, after all, right?  SO that gets hard to deal with, right?  Submerged feeling.  It means we have to learn how to feel DEEP and honestly.  And bravely.  For me, it is undoing all of this bent and twisted energy so that I can feel the free flow of the divine within me.  Unhindered, all of the things that caused the flow of energy to become turbulent…..just like how obstructions in a water hose will make the water flowing out of it spray and gush and behave erratically.  Energetically, these thoughts/feelings impede the flow of energy.  This is pretty huge, too.  Thought controls energy?  Well what do you think we could learn from that?  Could it lead us to a way of being where we could learn how to free ourselves from all sorts of limiting factors?  I recently watched a video of a man who had spent years learning how to clear himself and to use his energy for healing.  He demonstrated how he could shock people by touching them (no, not static, silly!) and inducing paper to burn using hot chi, something that I experienced in my body at one point that alarmed me but also served to heal and balance my energy.  And could it be just as simple as that?  Could it be as simple as clearing the pathway so that both the yin and yang channels, the positive and negative poles of our life force energy can better flow and merge?

So think about what it is that is drawing you and then think about how you feel when you feel scared to death when the draw brings you to that place.  What is that feeling you are seeking to turn away from?  What is it that your insides are trying to tell you?  It is creating a draw, yes, but look at what else it is doing!  It is serving to bring you to a place of honesty within.  Real deep kind of honesty.  And it can be messy.  Don’t be afraid.  We all shun these feelings because we think its not good of us.  I have spent years holding back some of this and I have during the last six months begun to really dig into it deeper and deeper.  Each time, though, the result has been the same; I release some deep hard knot in my being and the energy flows more gently.  I feel more peace.  And I am free from this feeling of impending doom or fill in the blank. We are, though, admittedly, perhaps unknowingly, addicted to our hard feelings.  It is the devil that we know.  It is time to let the tiger out of the cage!  Dive into that hardness and let this eenrgy flow into it and change it.  Just by LOOKING at it, it can change your life.  No, I offer you no methods because the “method” is the one that always brings you to the point of honesty and clarity.  I know that each time that I do everything I can to put my awareness on that shadow spot, I can feel how the light of my awareness and the divine energy that flows through the eyes of my own inner awareness that it is knowingly or unknowingly breaking those blocks apart, scattering the shadow and allowing it to transform, lift away, to go away for good.  And this?  It is not a rational process.  It requires you to just FEEL your energy.  FEEL it.

Wherever you feel a sense of tightness, there is something there.  Don’t try to wrestle with it.  Sit with it, FEEL it quietly.  Something inside of you KNOWS.  But this is why we meditate.  We do this in order to tune into the inner world of our energy.  This energy is also what is connecting us to the rest of the world. It can be beautiful once we have cleaned up the mess inside.  Instead of being pulled in different directions, we just feel acceptance, joy, bliss. And while I continue on this path, not pretending to be “done” with all my stuff, I have seven years or so of hard “work” of learning to let go, to surrender in ever deeper ways within myself.  As I do, I feel deeper into my resource field that makes it possible for me to move on to the next even harder spot.

It seems, for me, I have saved the hardest knots for last.  But you know what?  I am now very confident in my ability to just go ahead and face what I have seemingly denied for lifetimes.  letting go of this will free all my other selves, even those in the past, to know alternative pasts to follow.  I will indirectly be showing them the way.  It is such a personal and sometimes messy process, but we should never shrink back because of that.  So if using a technique works for you, use it.  ALL methods serve to help us FEEL a certain way.  Will it work for you?  Perhaps.  For me, I like a method-less approach because it leaves me with nothing between me and the thing I am facing.  A method is like a boat to get you there, but you have to abandon the boat once you get there.  This process demand absolute perfect and simple facing of whatever has not been faced.

Recently I faced a decision I had to make.  I thought about it and it unnerved me because my inner voice was telling me that I had to start doing the opposite of what I had been feeling I had to do.  So, despite all reason, I considered that there was a path to this that I had not considered, or that had been veiled.  I then did something I have not done in a long time; I picked up the I-Ching and threw coins asking my question about how I was to move forward.  What did I need to know about this?  What came up made me laugh.  It was “Abundance.”  You see, one of my biggest issues that crops up has to do with my relationship with women….and in this life it began with my mother.  I know that it has cropped up in other lives.  This has, at its root, something to do with the feminine force in things.  And abundance is deeply tied to the feminine.  It is the feminine that grows the new things within her.  There is an inception force, the masculine, which is necessary in all of this, but it is from this inception that grows miracles.  What comes from the feminine is larger than the sum of its parts.  This happens in physical life as well as in our spiritual life, too.  My journey has been in correcting my own inner glitch in how I am in relation to the feminine.  Something about my experience has put the breaks on my own ability to face my own ability to attract abundance into my life.  Don’t get me wrong, I have done well attracting it, but it is often full of hitches, what-if’s and a lot of turbulence.  There is a problem there.  The fear I have has manifested itself in abandonment in my early life, and this set the stage for always keeping people at a distance.  This emotional armoring has been falling away piece by piece over this entire process.  Layer by layer.  So to have abundance come up was very interesting.  To get to the bottom of it, I had to go forward, embrace whatever it was that was causing me trouble instead of resisting it and hoping it would just heal or go away.  Sure, given enough time, that old wound might scab over and fall away of its own accord.  Early in my awakening I had material like this that fell away in just this way; it was all very old material that had stuck itself to me even though it was no longer a part of my experience.  It was released when the being, an angel, who reached into my heart and pulled it out.  It was like a boneless dead body.  Gross!  I had been carrying that around all this time.  But what took its place was…..nothing.  It was a glorious emptiness that was now ready to be filled by this new energy filling my life. So just looking into it has shifted so much.  Where does it lead? I have no clue.  But you know, I know that the intelligence behind this energy, which is also the universe, I have no problem with.  I am connected to it…a cell within its body.  I trust this. It is not exactly God.  It is something larger than my own awareness….an awareness of what is.  If only it was so pat as a deity!

Then, a couple of days later I got a message from someone in my field of work who wanted to see if we could see if we could work out a working relationship that was beneficial to both of us. This had been something that felt being kept at bay.  I had been asking my inner self to show me the way with a larger community and perhaps a partner that could take my work to a whole other level.  I kept this neutral, not wishing to push it one way, I just asked that it be in the highest.  And then I got another call that had the power to move my work into another new direction.  Coincidences like these cluster around these kinds of shifts.  I once shifted some material and someone who had made a 100k offer on a building that was worth way more than that doubled their offer the very next day.  It had been six months since the last offer, and boom, out of the blue.  These have been so closely timed with these kinds of shifts that I have seen them as having a causal connection.  It is simply too coincidental.  These have always followed these releases.  Its as though events simply change or turn into something else, taking on an entirely different cast.  I have a number of cases like this where I literally bumped into someone who I didn’t know from Adam who was interested in something that I was trying to sell or move, and how it all happened was entirely “accidental.”  When you remove what divides you, the path opens up.  Mountain move. It is a potentiating of the waveform within the universe and within ourselves. I do think so.  When I can allow that wave to continue, interesting things happen, always.  Living on top of that wave is where things just happen like….magic.  Almost all of these things that happen are not the result of me doing anything….they just happen.  And this is so often how these things happen.  Events can begin to flow effortlessly, but it is we who need to do the clearing so the intention made has the ability to flow from us to the universe which will react, respond to that vibration.  The more open-ended you make the intention, the more freedom the universe has to bring you what is perfect.  That or its your higher self, which is what I am betting on.  We can go beyond just surviving.  We can thrive.  Instead of the law of the jungle, it can be the law of heaven.  Let’s give it a chance!

We are the ones who get in our own way, never realizing sometimes just how we sabotage ourselves.  So much of our suffering comes from looking outwardly and pointing to others, outside, for why we suffer, or why we have troubles or grudges or hurts or issues.  Year after year, layer by layer, I have watched as my life has changed right along with these changes within my own awareness…..old knots, blocks, samscaras, transmuted, replaced by the opposite the very next moment.  The very next moment.  I release a big old block from my heart and within hours the phone is ringing, resources of a different source pour in where before its shadow was all that could get through.  And it is why we feel the world is out to get us because these shadows are there IN us, and we do not realize its not the world that is set against us, but that a part of the world is its ability to mirror what we are, to follow our FEELINGS which are so often governed by our shadow or latent hurt or sense of somehow being limited…..but it isn’t the world as much as it is our impact energetically on the world.  The world, I know, is a chalkboard, a clean slate, a neutral slate, actually, upon which we write such permanent feeling things. It is only we who give them power.  But we shake our fists at this chalk dust and say how unfair the world is.  It is just chalk.  It is ours.  When we own it, we can release it. Face it, forgive it.

Every time I have ever sought to forgive another for the hurt done to me during this journey into myself has resulted in my becoming aware that it was not the Other that I needed to forgive, but that it was myself that needed to forgive itself.   Something in me seems magnetized, highly aware of the truth in this one shining moment of realization, as each time it was something I could not forgive myself, something that I held seemingly against the world that resolved all the way back to its roots into me.  Karma is never created because of another.  Never.  Karma is created by each of us on our own because of choices we each make in how we choose to respond, feel, or react. Choices that are based on how we choose to feel and react to the reality before us.  Many of these reactions aren’t even based on knowing the full story.  We assume, we let our beliefs or biases fill the gap in our understanding of what is true and then we MAKE that filling-in of that gap a reality, but all it ever was, was something based on HOW we were, not how the world was at all.  A parent, working long hours, is believed to be uncaring of his child because, after all, if he cared, he would be at home.  And yet, the bigger story is…well…much bigger than what the child sees or assumes.  We are all like this, misperceiving the world, seeing things as we are rather than how things are.  And this is how these misalignments lead us to karmic battles within us. We can spend lifetimes there running through the same cycles over and over until deep grooves are cut into our being which we carry over and over like old baggage from the 5th Century BC.  We go into it with our freewill and we get out of it through our freewill.  Clearing karma is clearing ones own soul.  I laugh when I think of some God judging us.  This sense of conscience exists in all things!  All things.  Even in the atom, even in the water that flows.  We each know what is right even though we have sought to hide the truth from ourselves.  But in pulling back the curtain with self honesty, these illusions cannot stand for very long.  Karma can be released quickly if you are ready.  Its is as easy or as hard as we make it. Being compassionate with ourselves and others is what most often provides the necessary sense of safety in exploring without fear of retribution, but in honestly and in our own way…..which often means going our own way.

And so, in this leg of the journey, I have found myself in a hard spot within myself.  I have realized that I have so many incredible resources that have emerged as a result of this journey, why would I let one old funky hard feeling trip me up?  Why?  No reason for that.  When I think of something, it comes to pass. Why not run with it?  Why not live abundantly?  The only thing holding me back is some old funky thing within….but even that has been only subject to a habit I have of reflecting on how others might see me or feel about me. Really.  What kind of crazy stuff is that? It is the last shovel-full of manure to be tossed from the stable of my soul.  And really, how I manifest has been pretty amazing……it is something we can all do.  It si what we are, what we each were born to do once we get out of our own way.

A few weeks ago as I drove out of my driveway it struck me that I really needed to contact a local news station to tell them about my efforts with my business, to help get the word out.  I knew that with what I did, they would probably be all over it, excited to do a story on a unique take on the holiday season.  But I stopped short.  I told myself that was too self-serving, too much….SOMETHING.  Maybe some misplaced voice was saying it was innapropriate somehow.  And yet, a story by them would have so helped me at a time when I needed it most! So I deferred.  In a few days, though, after announcing events at my studio through social media, I got a request from someone who wanted to come to my business to make some glass.  This person turned out to be a local news station meteorologist.  I again deferred saying anything that might seem self serving to this lady while she paid me to spend some hours making a variety of things she had always wanted to do with hot glass.  I knew she may have gotten pestered a lot in this way by the public.  She was at the studio to honor her Mother and make some glass.  I explained to her and her Mom what I say to most people; I am leveraging the resources I can to get the word out about my business locally, which means facebook and other sites.  If she wanted to say something about her experience, great.  I don’t twist arms, I want it to come in a genuine way, never forced.  When it is done in the right spirit, it just soars, you know?

So it came to pass that this lady could not get away to get her glass she had blown the week before.  For some reason my merchant account was not being agreeable about dealing with her credit card.  I was unable to collect payment for the private class she set up at the studio for that day when she came so I was eager to get her glass to her.  I was able to meet her to give her her glass and it turned out she took the glass back to the studio and showed some of the reporters what she had made (all of which was really great stuff) and I got a contact that same night from a reporter wanting to do a story on the studio.  So even though I resisted following through with my intention, my wish, my hope, the universe pretty well elbowed its way into my life and brought me what I needed.  Granted, it all came a couple of weeks late, it still came pretty swiftly for a guy who was resisting so hard!

Similar examples abound……events which were cancelled by others who withdrew support suddenly bloomed into the single most succesful weekend of the season…..a full two weeks past the Holidays!  Following in the wake of such hard changes, I dispaired over being able to garner the resources I needed in order to keep life and my business on a more even keel…..and yet….and yet….I felt within me this gathering storm of abundance that I knew could be tapped as though an endless spring moved beyond the small unassuming stop-cock that held back the ocean of energy and possibility, just waiting to happen, to flow into my life.  On top of this, people who had come out during Christmas were eager to come again. Others stepped in, bringing their friends and coworkers with joy and enthusiasm that quite literally lit up the studio.  On this visit one of the people who saved the day, pretty much singlehandedly, by being a supporter, said how he knew one of the anchors at another local station; he was close friends and suggested that I utilize this resource to help push the studio into a new level of exposure.  All of this coming all on its own, all stemming from an intention I have made, asking, “Mamma Universe, you are limitless even as I may think I am limited; bear to me your blessings and abundance so that I may bring my gift to my neighbors and community…”

It realy isn’t about money or things.  Its about feeling safe, about feeling supported by a force so large, it is all around us.  Had I not felt this abundance of soul come down around me that Summer night and heard Her voice speaking to me saying “Let go, let all of this hurt flow into me, let it go, let all of that old poison flow out from you into me; I shall transmute it by my blessings.  You do not know HOW to Forgive this and you don’t NEED to…you need only let go of it for a second so that it can be mine and then it will be gone….” I might not have fully realized the nature of this force….and like that, it was gone.  Like that, the tables turned from lack to greater abundance.  Abundance in feeling first.  The rest takes care of itself.  A clearer path for my own intention was what remained.  And really, that is all it is; getting the junk out of our own way so the magic  that is our own souls may better manifest as our hearts write new stories upon the chalkboard of the multiverse.  It sin’t the universe that judges us or decides.  It is in truth an inner authority, the divine within us, that does so.  When we can align to this, what I call Divine Alignment (it is also a blog by the same name), amazing things can happen for us, to us.

Just a few days ago I spoke to my daughter about the power of intention.  She has been able to see how this has worked, magically, for her Dad over the last few years.  Its not like it is a trick that I do.  I don’t.  I am not in control of what the universe sends me, but what it does send me is most often so perfect.  When I bought her a new bed, one that was taller than most beds, she said it would be great if we could find a desk that was flush with her bed so that she could sit on it and have her computer in front of her so she didn’t have to sit in a chair at her computer.  The following weekend we found someone had placed a wonderful oak desk by the curb, one that looked curiously close to what she had asked for in height.  Could it be?  There was also a desk chair that looked brand new, which was also one of the things on her list that she wanted for her room.  We set it up in the yard as we went on our errands and upon measuring it, it was the perfect height for what my daughter had wanted.  What were the chances?  This Christmas my daughter had mentioned that she wanted a very certain type of jacket for Christmas. Because of my lack of knowledge about how sizes are done with smaller kids, I was left guessing over whether a given size would be a good fit or not.  I needed to measure her to be sure, but I was never able to do this with how our schedule worked out.  I wound up with just a few days to do my gift shopping and had to pass on the coat.  This is a Navy peacoat, and her interest in it is based on how she had nestled into one of my coats which was a genuine peacoat style which she liked the feel of very much.  So this was a very specific style, not just any coat.  Last week I said I was sorry about not being able to get her the coat and suggested that we go down to the thrift store after making a clear intention to the Universe about having this type of coat.  I ended it with, “And we will know its being given when we ask that it be ten dollars!”  This was my way of adding an extra element in order to jack the odds.  We went down to the thrift store and lo and behold we found a peacoat in her size and color for $12.00!  I looked at her and asked her what the price was and gave her a sideward glance, saying, “Well, it was ALMOST the right price!”  Coats next to it were in the 20’s and 30’s.

Sometimes when I feel down, I shut myself off from these things happening…..I despair, or get down on myself, and forget that we are all this kind of magic, this kind of vibrant intention just waiting to leap out of the gate!  For my part, I feel a sense as though its just not my job to try and MAKE things happen, they come so naturally when I just step aside and trust in the universe.  And this is what I have been doing….I feel this massive abundance now that I know is just around the corner from me….why would I feel so impoverished with such incredible resources?  Why would I feel so limited when I have this father and mother who dwell within me, this yin and yang of the entirety of the universe that I can tap into with my own intention.  The purer and most direct the intention, the faster and more perfect the result!

The universe does not respond to thought alone.  It responds to FEELING.  Feeling itself is not some irrational thing, but it can have both negative and positive poles which we bring into the moment whether we are aware of it consciously or not.  This is why being in touch with all of your feelings and motivations are so important.  Do you feel worthy?  If you don’t, you will quite literally block the universe from flowing in an abundant way.  It is YOU who write  the story, so fill the story with the right feeling and it will be returned to you.  The WAY that you sow seeds is as important as the seeds that are sown.  Seeds sown in sorrow and lack tend to never even spring up and if they do, they can be children of the hand that scattered them.  So scatter your intention with joy and hopefulness and eliminate the feelings that say, “I never get what I ask for….” or “I am not worthy….” because regardless of the truth of this in the bigger picture (which is that you most certainly ARE worthy…we ALL are!), it is the picture that you are creating here and now. The problem with thought is that it can give you the grandest visions of how your life can be, but that is all it can ever be. You have to FEEL it all the way down to the bottom of your shoes and your soul before it can be something that will reflect this mental picture that you can see and know so well ….  BE it and it will show you itself AS you are.

We might appear to be limited finite beings, and in a very limited way we are….but just as a petal may think it is its own self, it is part of a larger body of being which is connected to a still larger being.  We are each multidimensional and the way toward glimpsing this is not through the rational at all, but through our one side that allows us to grasp the infinite; our feeling sides, our right brain, our boundless imagination, our own inner divine feminine, our Shakti who is the one who takes the masculine left brained intention (thought) and takes into her being so that this spark of thought is nurtured and  transformed  into an incredible miracle that is a new creation, a new life of sorts within our own lives.  This happens individually as it happens en masse.  We have an analog of the universe in us, a small mirror.  What do you wish to see in that mirror?  What brings you fulfillment?  What is in your highest to be, to do, to become?  Sometimes its the simple things….a desk for your daughter, a weekend at the studio helping people tap their inner creative fire, helping a friend selflessly, with full blessings and joy.  Sometimes its just getting the simplest of things for our most basic of  needs.  For me, I do not need much.  I just want to help change the world in whatever way I can that will lead to the highest.  Sometimes the highest is found in the simple things, which are  also glorious.

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