Archives for posts with tag: enlightenment

serveimage-1

People talk about it, this veil…but the veil is in us, that is where it is.  It is made up of a bundle of our biases, the lies we tell ourselves or that have been told to us and we never bothered to correct them, taking them on blind faith. So is it any wonder we call it a veil?  We have blinded ourselves.

The act of removing the veil is a sticky one.  There is so much to release, to remove. So much of it is forgiving yourself just so you can be closer to the Source of all things.  I wish awakening was enough to rid you of all your masks, all your illusions, and all of the misperceptions and delusions….but it is a process and it takes time, commitment, willingness to help it along through a practice (even if its your own that no one else taught you but your own shining heart).  As the veils fall, the world becomes clearer.  We see the world more as it is and less as we are.

 

Blessings on your path….

Advertisements

They don’t tell you this in the sales brochure, but Awakening isn’t all sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes it’s you, marinating in some dank dark oil of your own indefinable misery as you tell yourself that this must be what they mean about “Shadow Work.” Sounded pretty innocuous at first glance. It didn’t stop you from rushing through that door, though, did it? And it hasn’t stopped you from reading this far.

It gets better. I promise.

Awakening for Westerners is proving to be it’s own unique kind of experience. In India, the culture has systems in place that have been developed over hundreds, even thousands, of years all for the purpose of preparing the individual for one thing: awakening. This is in a word, called yoga, a system with multiple rungs intended to somatically clear the naddis (our circuitry for prana) of stored emotional energy in preparation for the emergence of a stronger or higher energetic state which is called kundalini. The results, then, are different for those in India than for most Westerners (with every case being unique). I could say it’s good to prepare, but here we are, Westerners, blank slates where awakening is concerned, now thrust into this new life. It’s a birth that took only seconds in some cases where everything is changed…..irrevocably. Truth is, we haven’t a clue about the kind of prep needed for awakening. But then again, this preparation wasn’t a part of our culture unless you count accepting Christ as your savior or having a meditation practice.

It’s exciting to watch as it takes shape. It can also be a little terrifying. It’s because something quite large is within and it’s running the show. For as freaked out as I was those first few weeks, I came to realize that this force was not here to hurt me. It never has. It has always removed things that in the end really did me no good at all. I thought of it as a chef in the kitchen of my spiritual life, concocting solutions, changing the menu, setting things right. I learned to stay out of the way, watching a master at work.

I lost really important relationships. I was crushed by a woman I was married to and had children with who sought to turn my children against me. It never hurts nearly as much as when they succeed, though. I was taught that some things just aren’t my own, and never were. I was just there, and it could have been anybody, really, the same scenario was going to play out for them. I saw the kitchen door open as the chef showed me the back door. He whispered, “It will be safer for you this way.”

There is hurt, happiness, fear, joy, loneliness, love, and longing. It’s all lit up, incandescent, at least for a time, so you can see your issues and foibles and learn to let them go. Since the truth is that material things don’t ever buy authentic happiness, the shift is into real often “lonely ” joy. It’s this solitary joy that is like entering the Holy of Holies. It is what dying is like, too, which is surprising when death comes because it’s such an expansive process rather than the dark ending that our worst fears promulgate. It grows in freedom the further you go along with it. It has a swirling beauty that is sensual and orgasmic. It is, of course, nothing like the Southern Baptist minister said it would be like. It’s clear that you are blissful now for no reason except that this is what you know about yourself, and it’s unbelievably beautiful. You feel this way because of this realization that woke you and opened you to your true nature as a child of the one great Light.

Even as you know this, you go through bliss to misery, sometimes many time in a day, a sure sign that your buried bones in your subconscious are still there, rattling away, killing the thrill of your “be here now moment.” You wake up one day and you feel paralyzed. Unable to move. The next day, the energy is leaping around the room and you hear voices or see shapes, or angels in the wee hours, or a hundred other amazingly wonderful things. On this day you are a golden goddess or a god,but you do wonder when it will turn to rust. But wait long enough, and you suspect you will be on that train to Paradise yet again. Something in you screams that there is a reason for this rapid cycling, and you’d be right. You make a new promise to let the energy penetrate as deeply as it can, next time, even if it does uncover acts and feelings you are ashamed of or that you have loathed secretly about yourself for years. As a Westerner, you probably have to be brought to the furthest edge of your misery before you are howling in the night, praying for it to come take you from your fucked up madness. And it does. Honestly, this is how souls are saved more often than we would like to admit.

One morning you might look in the mirror and forget for a few seconds who you even are. The disorientation itself is enough to keep your brow furrowed. You might worry that it might be a brain tumor but you think, “No, I’ll just wait” because you dont want to tip your hat to the world that you might be hip deep in a shit creek. Sure enough, it passes, but you get a feel for what a real brain tumor might be like and tell yourself that you’ll have to give to cancer research because what you just experienced was its own special version of a bad morning discovery.

You are visited by angels even as you are haunted by your demons. Its how this is for us; we didn’t prepare. We come to awakening dirty as sin while standing in the temple of our greater spiritual light. Lucky for us, this light is just so glad we managed to show up. There is a bit of muddy water until we begin to get washed clean. It goes on for years, really, but you can’t help but clean a dirty garment of its filth when you live in the water of life.

Over time, and in direct proportion to the amount of material you have released (It’s all repressed emotion from one traumatic event in your life to another), it gets easier. Turbulent intense sexual energy refines into finer vibration. It’s smoother. There are fewer stones in the road. It all takes time, dedication, and a willingness to just let go. What feeds your purpose stays, what doesn’t, goes. The pendulum swings aren’t as great as they were before. You don’t transit from heaven into hell and back again from one day to the next. Swings come, they just aren’t as destructive as they seemed before. We each have much to learn from each other who are going through this trial by fire and water.

It’s just your baggage. Seems you can’t be in heaven with it, so we learn how not to accumulate it here. And awakening is the magical elixir that makes it possible to heal the impossible. It loosens your grip, allows you to fall, it let’s you see that there is nothing except this feeling which is a version of what the great Light feels. It too was once lonely, and it speaks through the very light of awakening in as unobtrusive way as it possibly can. It wants to be with us if we can let it in. Its like how the Egyptian god weighed hearts using the feather as the measure. It isnt that you are damned if you have a heavy heart; you just cant feel or be aware of heaven without that lightness of being. Which of course begs and answers the question all at once that heaven is a state of mind and not a silly tale about a gated community somewhere.

The earthly self is one rung on this ladder into heaven. The Higher self is the second rung. From there, ever higher rungs lead us back into our ancestry, our origins, back to a less complicated way of being, and back to something we call God (note to self: no description can ever describe it).

It gets better. You get to be whoever, but perhaps more importantly however you want…. just as long as it’s your highest. Anything else will always be hard. What is easy is the flow. I know; Westerners look at flow and think “lazy ” but this is in truth learning to partner with physical reality to bring about the manifestation of important events that reveal a hitherto unknown quality for consciousness to join with the physical universe to make small and big miracles happen.

Whoah! That was fricken incomprehensible!

How about this: we are suddenly magical and can make miracles happen when its needed. It’s just co-creation and it has everything to do with how you feel and how your mind has been unleashed. Yes, it gets easier. It takes dedication and a lot of self honesty. This is turning the light back on yourself. What do you see? Yeah, shadow work.

It is lonely. It’s lonely realizing how everyone is caught up in a world that has very little to do with what is here on this planet, or that matters. Sure, you can get people to care so long as you tie it to a 5k Run for charity or you can create a slick meme you post on social media so it gets gobbled up and digested for a few moments. You wonder how anyone wakes up at all.

Can you see how our desire has been eating our planet alive? Car trips spewing carbon just so we can satisfy our desire to see someone we love,or to go to jobs, to do all the things we say and see as important. Plane trips to visit coral reefs in decline. An addiction to plastic that makes eating our Little Debbies so much more convenient but also gets into our rivers and lakes as microplastic, disrupting the guts of fish and their endocrine systems. Yeah. Big buzz kill, right?

The shape of our desire has forced us to live easy but it comes with a price. Again, buzz kill, but it’s true. People who want things so they can feel a certain way….cars, houses, and relationships. We marry so we won’t be alone. We have children because we don’t want to die alone. We buy nice things sometimes to scare away a deeper sense of poverty or fear that we aren’t good enough. Once in a great while we get really honest about what is motivating us, but we usually want what we want. We will take dying rainforests and bleaching coral reefs just to get those Little Debbies and lifestyles born of a desire that is killing our world. And there you sit, on your own, watching this giant pooping machine of hunger turn and move. You are, afterall, a part of it, too, but maybe a little more aware of what’s going on because a channel was opened in you that let you feel the connection everything has with everything else as you can’t help but feel a sacredness about it which leads to grace. But it still won’t change unless we are it’s harbinger, it’s mover, it’s shaker, it’s champion. The loneliness might also come from knowing that the life of desire, the shape of desire as we know it now on average, is coming to an end as it pertains to what we think will make us happy…

Nothing, though, brings as much exquisite….feeling…than the energy in awakening, simply resting in the heart of the divine. And that too is a challenge because it washes away desire for the things of this world. Is it any wonder we demonized it back in the garden by calling it a deceiver who brings knowledge? But still, I challenge you to find anything as incredible as the light which confers a standing wave of orgasmic ecstasy pulsing through every level of body, mind, heart, and soul for days-months-at a time.

It does get better, but it’s a new world. Maybe we need this so badly that it’s coming the way it is…to people nearly unbidden and woefully unprepared. It’s a new orientation, a new world, if we can take it.

Namasté ❤

A little handmade humor for your day, courtesy of WTI! 

sahin-8

Artist: Hüseyin Şahin

 

What is the merit of holding on?

 

Fists of your heart

 

clinging since before your birth

 

to what keeps the rush of the real

 

at bay.

 

Just listen to your words

listen to the secret language of your heart

 

feel it deep

 

deep

 

the luscious words are there

like a bubbling spring

 

a creek

a brook

yearning for its ocean tide

 

as was ever-written

 

on this heart of mine

-on all of ours-

 

 

that it is time to just let go.

 

 

“It is such a lonely place!”

that false heart cries

your hands clenched tight

 

where do you think you will ever go?

 

the biggest lie you tell yourself

is never as big as this one

because it was born from the blindness

which will lead you to the blazing light

where nothing can be hidden anymore

 

Where is the merit in what has always been?

Where does the new get born in such a place as this?

 

Just let go…in everything….in all of it….because of it….for it… and be free.

 

You just gotta learn how to set yourself free.

 

 

 

 

by Kabir


English version by Andrew Harvey
(Originally Hindi)



The Lord is in me, and the Lord is in you,
As life is hidden in every seed.
So rubble your pride, my friend,
And look for Him within you.

When I sit in the heart of His world
A million suns blaze with light,
A burning blue sea spreads across the sky,
Life’s turmoil falls quiet,
All the stains of suffering wash away.

Listen to the unstruck bells and drums!
Love is here; plunge into its rapture!
Rains pour down without water;
Rivers are streams of light.

How could I ever express
How blessed I feel
To revel in such vast ecstasy
In my own body?

This is the music
Of soul and soul meeting.
Of the forgetting of all grief.
This is the music
That transcends all coming and going

getfileattachment-7

 

Your bag is packed

it screams to be released

how long do you think your hands can continue to clutch

the lie that we all want to believe?

We let go

bliss slips around us

a delicious remembering

amidst a cloud of forgetting

the ancients dance in us

as the shame that we have shackled ourselves with

falls in splendid beauty

wonder

and awe.

 

We make others responsible

for what we  cannot bear

what has been ours

and whose roots dig deep within us

and masters us.

We lie to ourselves

and forget

taking the mirror

for reality

laying the guilt

on the shoulders of the innocent,

a dirty inculcation

into what is untrue.

 

We are that mirror

and we are all it shows us.

 

Who is brave enough to turn it ’round

to see it rightly

or finally?

 

Do you know who you are

behind the lies you tell,

the lies we all tell others

and ourselves,

the lies that we each believe?

There is such sorrow in these lies

we cannot help but tell ourselves

and others

as though we can slip one more day

through the keyhole crack

and continue wandering like thieves

free from persecution

for one more day…

free and shackled.

 

Losing your head,

your drive to think,

you feel

but how deeply can you feel–

can you fall deep within the truth

or do you make deals with it

to pretty it up

or bend it to your will

or do you bend to it

and let it take you

like a lover

who seeks to destroy

all you held dear

and all that ruined you

for lifetimes

so that you might find yourself wrecked

in a new and beautiful way?

Who is brave enough to take such a dare?

 

The great magic is upon you now

and your thoughts are lost

and your being is emergent.

Who is the you that you are?

Do you know?

 

Will you fall into forgetting

trusting that love will support you

and take you down

into nothing

so that you may be remade?

No one sees more clearly

when these veils are lifted from  within

because there is a deeper veiling…layer upon layer of it…

and the only veils

are those that we each have made.

Can you be the agent of your own undoing?

From 2010….

 

Shame on you
you dry canals
you fearers of truth
you forbid the very essence of divinity
whilst in the same sentence condemned
and hid
the truth
of our greater being.

Some books
forbidden.
Long since the Master
had come and gone.
Who made you the expert on the divine cosmic
you whose waters were imaginary
entirely fabricated
and guessed?
Liars
fakirs
fearsome of the wholesome truth of your being
you stripped a promising tradition
of its true power
and sent the Master’s words into oblivion.

You hid half the divine under a bushel
but she is emerging
It is time.
Your high morality
imagined,
created,
showed at least
that belief
has its own power
we must be careful of the gods and beliefs we choose
they reinforce each other.

The tide is  turning.
Time to move with the tides.
Your centuries of hate and killing is enough.
Your power was entwined with blindness
your hands bloodied.
It is time to step aside
catch your breath
and consider there is another way.
Let the master in each step forward-
heresy is now the sacred.

image

The light which enters my room speaks to me. It is a brilliant presence beyond presence, a majesty beyond all majesty. All things are known through me, it says just now. It tells me with a smile to put away my old childhood things; our beliefs in a man-god, the belief that it wants to be worshipped. It was you who misunderstood, I have only wished that you know this love, a great liberator, which is the essence of worship.

The light first came in an entirely inconsequential way. It came as a brilliant flash, with no presence or meaning or grand pronouncements. I was not ready then, merely an initiate, unaware of what was to come. I even thought someone was playing tricks on me, but no one was there turning my night into day. The one clue was how I held myself, my awareness…it was awareness without looking, a gaze of mind that was without direct focus and held just long enough for the light to flood in. It is this gaze which can be taught to anyone.

It would return endlessly, making of me a lover of its flame. By then, the light was deep within and turning out all the things that got in the way of its revelation in me. This, first heavy, grows light as it does it’s work.

It has come bidden, always, ready to reveal mystery after mystery and turning all to light. And as each layer is touched, deeper and deeper still, more of what no longer belongs. The revealer frees those imprisoned by its touch. Ray upon ray the light has done this and dares do more.

In turns it seemed to come from without, but it’s presence becomes my own. The riddle of it is it’s own mystery. A light that come bidden, a light that professes to be what I will be in the future of my time, a light whose waves I ride and read upon it anything that has ever been. Like a vast nervous system whose story is written in its own essence.

This light which comes hence is not the light of this world, but the light which is in all things. It does not come, but has always been, and waits for us all.

A goodie….from 2010 re-published here from my sister site Divine Alignment on blogger…

As I align to HIM
I feel you
deeper
stronger.
more present
The truth of this
shimmers in the moment
as I round corners
faster
seeking it
every breath a reunion
as every pulse of its being
mirrors the multiverse
as awash we are
in locks and keys
each particle of our being
unleashing an infinite possibility
as the secret
the alchemy
is worked
and energy is released
and one more great lesson is experienced
in the moment
as the compass of certainty
turns us round the inevitability
of our becoming
and the certainty
becomes its own end
without an end.

I shall hold you
in this purposeful embrace
as secrets move
wordlessly
between us
as lips
sealed
but hearts wide open
speak of an unbelievable truth
felt as bliss
known as the love we have inside
love is all there is
after all
as end meets end
and the dawn of beginnings
rises
like the sun
scattering stars
in the lost night of soul

%d bloggers like this: