Archives for posts with tag: enlightenment

All throughout this blog much of what I have written in regards to my personal experience related to the phenomenon of awakening has been to suggest directions in which we can all go, or consider as areas of inquiry about the unfolding nature and emergent nature of our consciousness particularly as it relates to “enlightenment” (for as much as I dislike the term) or awakening (which is much better I think since it more accurately suggests what is happening in the process). This is something that you have yourself. You only need enough interest and passion, to investigate it seriously enough to begin developing your own natural abilities.

Many masters who teach about the nature of enlightenment warn against filling the mind of the student with too many ideas about what to expect concerning any number of different facets of the journey to enlightenment. What often happens is, by not knowing, the student or neophyte builds up in their mind what they think the experience might look and feel like. By doing this, the mind creates an imagined image of something that in all likelihood is innacurate. The problem with this is that it represents a journey away from what is most essential. These things are so simple even a child knows how to relate to them. Be ye like children!

The other side of the coin is that as sentient beings, we have the operations for enlightenment already within us. The Buddha sleeps in all, and when it awakens, it reveals what is most essential or true when the personality can listen to it with the innocence and open curiosity of a child (with no assumptions taken on). If one does what was prescribed for reaching the awakened state, there is nothing else to teach because the innermost knowing, the cosmic consciousness of the Hindu the Tibetans, Taoists, or the gnosis of the early Christians, is revealed or made manifest. Even as I say this, though, there can be the expectation that awakening is an arrival, suggesting to some that upon awakening I will know all that needs to be known when in fact this knowing operates more like an onion that we peel back layer by layer to the degree that the personality (and ego) are ready to examine and be open to this new knowledge. It is possible for the personality to be resistant to an important truth in the process, and as a result, the information or awareness of that information can be kept out from personal awareness and ones experience.

In reality the ordinary person is laboring, unknowingly, under the operatiom of countless inner programs which directs her attention which we call beliefs. It is hard to know or to realize the degree to which these beliefs govern perception or awareness. All who labor under them do not know that they do so, and are completely unaware that belief is governing them.

When I say belief, I mean any number of ideas which a personality can hold. It can be beliefs about how the person thinks the world works, which can include beliefs from the culture (often reflected in words like “values”), politics, and religion or spirituality. The hardest beliefs to identify are the ones that don’t seem to be beliefs at all. There is a very neat trick we play on ourselves sometimes when we tell ourselves that we don’t believe in something. “I don’t believe in this Judeo Christian concept of God” and the self then thinks it is being naturally innoculated against belief. In truth, this is itself a belief, one in which the world is devoid of a superconscious whose existence gave direction or form to the worlds we know today. What results is an end to any meaningful investigation along these lines of an inner direct manner.

What this belief does is it builds up an artificial wall within experience and perception that then says (without pronouncing it loudly), “I will disregard anything pertaining to the existence of a divine presence!” The self perhaps believes this because the stories written about God strike them as preposterous or unlikely, maybe more reflective of our ideas of what a God might be like (which of course many stories about God do contain). What is lost is the path to what a god might actually look like or be beyond the world of built-up ideas, legends, myths and tales (i.e., beliefs).

We all have the ability to know just about anything about the universe. I know that may sound impossible to some, but one thing I learned early on in my awakening process is that beyond the island of our carefully managed beliefs is an ocean of knowledge just waiting to be tapped into.

It’s interesting how a belief, which we tend to feel is so completely true can in fact misdirect us so much. The reason why it does this is how belief requires the mind to stop probing and sensing inwardly. This probing is called the intuition, and part of it involves the nonlocal or universal mind. Some call this the higher self. In truth all designations have truth and each are connected to the other so that yes, it is universal mind AND it is the higher self AND it is the accumulated wisdom of the self that you are right here, right now.

Belief involves a suspension of critical examination, part of the logic process, that shuts down any effort at questioning the belief. Belief has at its core a circular motion whose only purpose is to perpetuate itself. This is how silly ideas have been perpetuated for thousands of years largely unchecked.

As humans, we are so used to using the rational mind as if it is the end-all and be-all of intellectual determination, when in fact logic only plays a very limited role in this process. The part of the mind and brain that handles logic has no intuitive capacity. Logic is a tool that was designed to be used by the intuitive self for testing its knowledge. It isn’t the knowledge itself, but is a process by which things can be known experientially. Logic, then, would be the discipline that would allow you to properly investigate the evidence of God existing in all of matter, for instance. How that is done is an investigative process when the intuition either does not know or knows so well that it gives up its knowledge so clearly that the logic-driven experiment is simply known without needing trial and error to reveal the correct steps in the experiment. Both instances are possible but it seems that unless a person is clear or knowledgable of the steps required that some trial and error is required. Einstein knew in an intuitive flash the ideas behind Relativity but spent years working out the math to explain it, for instance.

It sounds impossible that the mind could know what the self has no experience with, but this is precisely what intuition can do. You might be like Einstein and see the core of the math as phenomenon without knowing the math at all. It is instead experienced directly as a felt experience. Feeling is operative in having intuition work well. It is the opposite of logic.

The most important part in learning to cultivate intuition is being alright with having no formulated ideas about how a given inquiry will go. Will we find God lurking in the subatomic particles? Who knows, it’s a mystery. Let’s keep our mind completely open.

The mindset most necessary to nurturing intuition in my experience is this attitude. It assumes nothing at all. In fact, the more you can learn to let the mind be a blank screen, the more likely you are to catch glimpses of what is actually out there. In this case, the radio is not talking to itself but is in contact with the multiverse. I am trying to show you how to be a gifted channel for the universe. Intuitive is receptive and has often been seen as feminine while logic is more masculine. These are qualities every person has, so everyone has an equal opportunity to be able to develop it if that is their interest.

The more you can completely suspend belief, the better you will be at receiving, like a radio, the information that exists “out there.” While this has been central to the investigative and psychic method known as remote viewing, it is also how many of the most gifted psychics operate: completely blind. Doing this, while disconcerting for some at first, is the only real way to go when doing this work. It requires a suspension of ego, and self as the judge of experience. There is a lot of very neurotic habits tied up in needing to know to the point where one becomes rigidly fixed in ego and the personality and all of its previous experience, now controlled and filtered by its conglomerate of beliefs, traumas, and habits, so that the deeper truth may have no hope of ever emerging. There is simply too much competing material.

This also suggests that releasing stored emotion is another strand in the path to becoming more intuitive. Experience has shown that the best intuitives are those who have been at this work for lifetimes and is often an outgrowth or consequence of a deep abiding desire to know the truth and not a version of it. This is most often driven by a great love within and a devotion for truth. It often means stripping the self bare, often of cherished notions, just to know what is real or true. This forms itself into a multi-lifetime journey that takes time to develop and mature into. It may be that you have done this work before and are reading this now because you need to be reminded. If you have no experience with this, this might be the catalyst that starts the process. It isn’t like you will have to wait lifetimes because its capacity is already in everyone. You need only to know how to bring it out. Experts may have been at it before, but this is a capacity all humans have.

To cultivate this in your life requires practice. Most assume that the logical part of the mind is superior, and so always grasp for that reflexively. Can you differentiate between logic and intuition? Do you know it when you feel it?

In truth, logic is inferior to the part of mind that can know the cosmic, which is a completely different part of the brain from the logical linear left hemisphere. It isn’t that the brain creates or generates these experiences, but more that they both receive, like a biological radio, signals from the nonlocal consciousness that exists outside of time and space and is thus transcendent by its very nature. The personality thus does not realize how naturally psychic that it is.

The most uncomfortable condition for many along this path is being okay with not knowing. The most important skill to my mind in this work is getting used to not knowing, or being a blank slate. When you can do this, you do not engage the part of you that grasps. This is always the logical side of self. It thinks that is the path to success. Only in its limited way is this true.

What I want to point you to is how to not grasp, instead, holding your hand (your mind) open. When you do this, all the sands of all the deserts flow through your hand. Try and grasp it, and you only get a bit of grit.

The intuitive right brain operates best when wide open so that it can be the expert channel that it is. It knows nothing and yet can know All. The skill in using it lies in knowing when it is being used then trusting that when the sand flows that it can see the one single grain that you wish to see. It’s intelligence is a mystery how it does what it does. When I use it to locate a friend, it shows me the scene where she is in this very moment. I note the time, I jot down the details, and I ask her what she was doing between 11:00 a.m. to noon EST. I never know what I will see or be led to. Sometimes intuition will work on its own. You pluck a book randomly off a library bookshelf, pop it open, and find the very page that answers your question from an hour before.

Putting my money where my mouth is, I did all my research for a chapter in a book using only the intuitive as the way. Instead of researching authors and finding dead-end after dead-ends after spending hours in the library, I instead would accidentally discover passages in books that contained the informatiin that I needed. People would mention sources without my hsving mentioned needing the source—this was all serendipity. This happened numerous times. I already knew the material but I needed additional sources more than just me saying it for the book. This worked beautifully. Intuition brought me to sources within moments instead of days or weeks of searching card catalogs or reading extracts, for example. This all seems impossible, but for the intuition, anything is possible (or nearly so). Anyone can do what I do. This is the entire point for me writing this to you.

The good thing about this is you can test yourself and work to hone your skill in this area. When you get a miss, it requires, for me, to go back and think carefully about what I was doing at the time. Chances are, I assumed something or thought something instead of abiding with the information. I inserted an assumption somewhere. It usually isn’t a mere miss, but because I inserted something from my mind into the flow of information.

There are many benefits to doing this work. It reveals how neurotic we can be in needing to know and to control our environments when the impulse to control is itself the antithesis of genuine knowledge very often. By clearing the mind you can enter into silent presence, which is a great way to feel the soul of the world or the presence behind all things. It leads to deepening relaxation and the untying of emotional knots within the self. It is an undoing that feels like a threat to the neurotic, to those who always needs to know what’s happening and how to manage it. It undoes the fundamental lack of trust in the world as a safe place to be. There is no need to rush—we have plenty of time (lifetimes in fact). It can lead you to your fundamental nature as a creative being, a creative energy felt as bliss.

You have to learn to trust yourself and to depend on yourself to do this work. Start simply, inquire, and practice. If you keep the findamental ideas in place, any practice (not built on belief) will likely work.

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vimana#/media/File:The_Celestial_Chariot_(6124515635).jpg

Now for something completely different. Following disclosures by the U.S. government of some of what it knows in regards to the U.F.O.’s (rebranded now as Unidentified Aerial Phenomenon or UAP’s), it may help to learn of a project that was undertaken by a linguist that may have shed some light on our ancient past as it relates to the ET presence on the earth.

Mauro Biglino was tapped by the publishing arm of the Vatican to perform its most up to date translation of the oldest versions of the Old Testament in existence. This work, which took some years to complete, included 23 books total. Some books the Vatican decided not to publish since they went against long-standing beliefs concerning what people have long-believed to be the “real story”.

Biglino was familiar with the process that other linguists have performed when translating these documents in the past. A system is used that assumes that certain words in Hebrew result in specific types of translations. In Hebrew there are no consonants, which means that the reader must bear in mind the context of what is being said in order to arrive at the correct words intended. While this isn’t a problem for the bulk of Old Testament reading in Hebrew, there are instances where words can be changed. Biglino thus went to work making a literal translation rather than using the standard program for translation that had been in place for a very long time. While the Vatican approved and printed 17 of his translated books, there were others that they did not publish. In those unpublished works, our understanding of what was written is brought into question, with the result that the Elohim of the Old Testament reads more as beings that came from the sky, who mingled with people of the Earth, and who were involved in the affairs of humans for many generations.

Using his knowledge of other languages like Sumerian, he goes into the Sumerian creation myths and finds that the stories told are startlingly similar in them as those in the Jewish tradition, often bringing up similar people (sometimes with different names) serving the same roles from one culture to the others. In The Jewish tradition there are angelic beings called the Watchers that show up in the Sumerian tradition, for example. In some cases, stories in the Sumerian tradition do not show up in the Jewish one, but bear so many similarities as to the nature of the characters described that Biglino suggests that these may well be the same people, the same story, describing how humans were created by a race that came from the stars. Sound impossible? Judea and Babylon are not far removed from each other, and Jews were taken into slavery by the Babylonians during the reign of Nebuchadnezzar. But, we are told that the Jews had Genesis well before this time. Was it possible that the two cultures had previous contact? It does not seem out of the question.

When Biglino has debated Hebrew and Christian priests on this matter, many have agreed that his translation work is accurate, what they don’t agree with are his conclusions.

From a video presentation Biglino has given explaining some of these issues he says: “Actually the Bible says that we were made using a certain amount of material which contains Elohim’s image and that has been cut out. Now everyone today knows what we are referring to when we say that we take something that contains the image of an individual that has been cut out, it’s the DNA. With all probability this biblical tale is the summary of the Sumerian tablets tale, in particular the “Enuma Elish” that is when the Sumerians tell about the beginning, but where the Sumerians are much more precise than the Bible, because the Sumerians who never thought of creating a religion. They never built a temple, never talked of Gods,the way we mean it, but they spoke of those people….with respect because they were much more developed technologically.” (see video below) Is this merely a coincidence, an appearance, a conflation? If so, then in Biglino’s work, these types of things happen a lot. After a while, it can begin to strain credulity and it gets harder to not see that the Jewish stories and the Babylonian ones weren’t taken from the same root story, which describes how beings called the Annunaki came to earth, described the solar system and the planets within it, and where earth was located in that order (really!) and performed a process that sounds remarkably like cloning or a hybridization of earthly beings (primates) into the species known as humans.

It all sounds incredible, impossible, and this is why you should listen to Biglino explain what it was he found when he translated the Bible in a way it had not been translated before. Biglino suggests that the reason why we have the stories that we do is in large part due to how the translational method has hidden what may be the real truth which has been right under our noses the whole time.

In one tradition, they were beings that came and developed a breeding program, describing what sounds to modern scientific understanding to be a cloning process, or taking a primate and blending their own DNA to produce a being (human) who would be bred as a worker inside gold mines that the Annunaki needed for their home world. What is so interesting about the Sumerian stories of the creation of human kind that it is hard not to see it as beings from another world coming here for a mining expedition. What is curious is how in the Sumerian stories, they describe the use of the gold that they mined, which was suspended in their atmosphere to enact a change in their climate or planetary condition. At first the Annunaki were able to find gold easily, but later had to dig for it and this was where the breeding program came into play. In the Hebrew tradition, much of this material is left out. Biglino describes how the two traditions are describing the same story, with one being an abridged version. Biglino explains that once the literal translation was made, the story was quite different. Instead of one God who created humankind, it was instead a group of beings, and not all of them were on equal standing with one another. Yahweh, for example, was put in charge of a relatively fringe group in a desert region. He wasn’t given the best people or the best location. To hear Biglino explain it, the story takes on a very different implication.

When you read the Enuma Elish and see how similar it is to the Genesis account, what I came to realizing was that these two stories may well have come from the same earlier story which people in the region had been telling for many generations. What makes the Enuma Alish different from the Genesis story is that it includes much more detail. Same story, one shorter, the other longer. The longer story describes how these beings, the Anunaki, came to Earth and began to create a new species of creature on the earth. The story reads almost like a record of all of the failed attempts, pointing out that when the efforts at creating a being (a human) weren’t working, the head Anunaki offered his own (genetic) material from his body, thinking that it would somehow be the answer. But, this turned out to be disastrous. If the Anunaki were divine beings it seems that all of this fiddling would not be necessary. The account reads of numerous failed biological experiments: one being upon being made urinates constantly until it becomes dehydrated and dies. Another has its organs on the outside of its body. Still another does not have eyes. In each case the humans are created in what looks like a vessel like a bath which is situated in the ground. In all cases, humans are made using the blood of the gods. When you look beyond the talk of gods and goddesses, the story reads as a group of people who came who wanted a work force who would serve them. The deeper you go into the story, the more details that surface that look….well…consistent with physical beings instead of gods. Biglino points out how the Anunaki asked for humans to make burnt offerings because their chief god liked the smell, that it was favorable to him. He goes on to explain that during the Apollo missions, the material from the suits was used to create a scent that astronauts were provided with in order to get them used to the smell of space. It turns out that when astronauts were coming back into the capsule from being on the moon that there was a smell that was often described as smelling like burnt meat. Biglino asks the question, did these beings like this smell of burned meat because they were space-faring beings who had grown accustomed to it? In the Jewish tradition, the Elohim (which is plural not singular—itself a paradox since YHWY says that there are no others “beside me”) are told that they are the “Chosen” People. In modern day abduction literature the ET’s tell many abductees that they too have been chosen. When Biglino translates the encounter that Moses has with the Elohim on the Mount it begins to read like an ET encounter in which a heavy object which flies, comes up to the Mount and shows itself to Moses. Moses is told that he has to hide in a cleft in the rock or else he might die from exposure to something coming from the object. In the traditional translation this is because the glory of God is so great that it can kill a person. But how can a spiritual quality physically kill a person, Biglino asks? This reads as a physical effect that causes a physical outcome. What is interesting is that when Moses comes down from the Mount, part os his face is burned from his sighting and his close proximity to the craft. He has a cloth covering his head as it was in the full sun and he later felt poorly enough that we then went into his tent for the rest of the day. Moses sees the Elohim because he tells the voice in his head which has been speaking to him that he needs some proof as to the reality of the being and what it had been telling him telepathically. He explains that he needs to be able to tell the people below that this phenomenon is real and he isn’t just hearing voices in his head. You can perhaps understand his position: he is their leader and now he is going on about how he is hearing this clear voice in his head telling him what to do. Up until now the voice has led them out of Egypt, but humans are humans and require continuous proof if they themselves are not witness to it.

Here you can see his presentation from which the above quote is extracted:

The complete presentation can be viewed in the next video (below). It provides a lot of the background concerning the work that Biglino was tapped to do for the Church and how it proceeded. He also explains how he searched the roots of the words that he translated literally, which will help to explain how his translation take on a very different meaning especially the earliest books. If you would like to skip to the most relevant material, go to the 10:00 mark in the following video, which is where he goes into the translation and meaning of RUACH, the beginning of unwinding this translational tale.

It is worth mentioning that in India they have detailed descriptions of flying craft called Vimana. These devices are described not in a mythical fashion as one might expect with a chariot of the gods, but instead reads like a users manual. No allusions, no parables, no mythic language. One such vimana is called the chakra vimana. Chakra means disc. Flying disc. This is the same description made of ET craft. What gives? According to Biglino, similar craft are described in the ancient texts like the Bible but their meaning has been hidden behind the way in which the translations were made to turn ET’s into gods. If you watch the video you will see how Biglino dives into the device that David uses when he fights the giants. Biglino explains that this device is described as a communication device that brings the Elohim to David whereupon he is taken up into a flying object and taken to the Temple where others get out. Biglino goes to Ezekiel and the object he describes there is drawn by a technician at M.I.T. and the result? It certainly sounds and looks like a flying ship, and not altogether different looking than the description of the Indian vimana.

There is also very compelling evidence of early Christians being aware of an ET presence, which they called the Archons. This is largely contained within the mystic writings of early Christianity and were pushed out by the more exoteric wing of Christianity which would today be known as the Orthodox church. In 100 A.D to the mid second century, however, the mystics existed alongside the exoteric-minded followers of Christ. In their books, specifically The Hypostasis of the Archons (p.161, The Nag Hammadi Library, John Robinson, ed.) and the First Apocalypse of James (p. 265, The Nag Hammadi Library, John Robinson, ed.), the Archons are mentioned in some detail. In the Apocalypse of James, Jesus is explaining how beings called the Archons, Described in the Hypstasis as looking like an aborted fetus, come in threes and attempt to take souls by theft. Only by performing a series of declaratory statements can one escape their efforts to take the person. In the Hypostasis of the Archons it is explained that these beings exert a form of synthetic reality called HAL which makes it seem as though they are like gods (but they are not), and also that these beings are often involved in wanting to interbreed with human women. The Gnostic Christians, as may be clear, were not fans of these beings, but how they describe them suit the modern abduction literature in some pretty amazing ways. In the modern ET literature (Budd Hopkins, Whitley Strieber to name a few) it is widely known that the ET grays perform their activities in threes and are able to take a person “by theft” or, that is, against their will through a form of mind control. In the modern abduction stories abductions always take place with three of the alien grays (there are some instances where this does not happen, but the “three” grays are a regular occurrence in the literature).

It is worth noting that books like the Hypostasis of the Archons were scrubbed from any mention in ancient or modern Orthodox Christianity. It was only in 1945 that these and over 50 books from this line of early Christian thought reemerged in an amazing discovery in the desert of Egypt near the town of Nag Hammadi. This was the same year that a giant trove of Jewish scrolls were discovered in Qumran near the Dead Sea. What is so interesting about this mystic strand of so-called Gnostic writings, is that they describe the process of awakening and its many effects. What these early Christians caught onto was nothing less than what the Hindu describe in their own texts as kundalini. It is interesting how when given some of the most sophisticated documents pertaining to the process of enlightenment, the church has chosen to remand them to obscurity. I will also point out that there is a high correlation between awakening and encounters or awareness of ET or other intelligence which could be called “galactic” in character (not human) which those awakened report communing with or having a sense of connection with (some suspect that they have had past lives AS ET’s, and this turns out to be somewhat common in the abduction community, too).

Further, when the Gnostic Christians began to explore the spiritual dimensions which were opened to them with their practice of seeking, they found what many find: a presence which underlies all things, is wedded to every molecule and resides within it, and is a silent presence that observes creation. Encounters with this presence were described as a pure white light in which existed a consciousness of a being that was pure love and compassion. Just entering into this light in meditation would change a person. They then saw how the God of the Old Testament was at odds with what they had themselves uncovered. They then created a myth to explain why the God of the Old Testament was so different from the God which they had discovered and it played out this way: The world was created from a failed attempt at creation, what is called a demiurge. Sophia, the feminine aspect of the divine went off and tried to create a world on her own without the father. This explains why the world is the way it is, because it was “begotten” imperfectly. Sorry, ladies, it seems men from the past can’t help but heap blame on women. While the story of the demiurge seeks to explain why things are they way they are, I observe that this was done in order to make sense, to do what many people do when faced with contradictory accounts in Biblical stories both Old Testament and New, which is they seek to harmonize them in some way that then makes sense. In the early Christian harmonization the God of the Old Testament is jealous and wrathful because he wasn’t really God at all, but a being that arose from an improper creation. Well that explains it! The real God was there all along. Me, I see people who were looking at an imperfect being, which could have been a physical being, an Annunaki from elsewhere, who acted like a god or who was raised to that status over generations in the old stories. When I awoke and began feeling the presence in the Light, I had a similar reaction: the God from the Old Testament does not cohere to my own direct experience. Was that “god” in the Old Testament even a god at all? When Jesus brought the “new covenant” was this equal to his pointing to the old God as being at odds with the God which we find when we seek within and which other cultures might call the Tao or Brahma, The Great Mystery, etc.?

Could it be that in our past we had contact with races from other planets, races that took an interest in us, perhaps even creating us using local planetary stock along with their own D.N.A.? In the abduction literature, those individuals who claim to have been taken onboard ET craft to be examined and who had sperm and ovum extracted, among other things, have reported that the ET’s told them when their captors were told that they had no right to be doing what they were doing said, “We DO have a right. We MADE you.” Now a human living today, unaware of our ancient past as far as the Annunaki and the creation myths are concerned, this might be impossible to hear, but given what Mauro Biglino and others have to say on the subject, it might be a relevant retort.

It might seem impossible to splice D.N.A. from a completely different species from another planet to that on another planet. However, consider that the universe is a very old place and it is not out of the realm of possibility that life here could have been seeded not just by comets, but by space-faring civilizations with an interest in spreading the genome far and wide. In billions of years it is not out of the question that what we think of as our D.N.A. could be part of a much larger subset of a D.N.A. spectrum that has a lot more in common with life on other planets than we might want to admit. Just the fact that nearly all ET’s are described as a “five star” (one head, two arms, two legs) arrangement could reveal that evolution of life beyond our planet may well have proceed along more similar lines than we might believe is possible (either seeded far and wide or a factor present in cosmic evolution). All ET’s are upright humanoid looking beings which, in some cases, have very different features, yet they tend to have all of the same features that we do (but in different proportions—smaller ears or noses, larger heads or eyes, etc.), but it is this kind of similarity that poses a unique question. Are they a version of us, or we a version of them? Or, is it just possible that cosmos-wide, all of nature, terran or not, there might be a preference for advanced life to share certain traits that wind up being common?

Most believers recoil in the face of the possibility that their cherished notions might be part of a different story. I have always been interested in the “marginalia” of our world because as is often the case today’s myth often had a way of becoming tomorrows certainty. The universe is a much stranger place than we could ever imagine.

~Parker

Lao Tzu once said that men, in order to know the Tao, needed to cultivate a receptive feminine quality in their minds, in their consciousness. It was this quality that open men up and allows them to relate better to the feminine principle so that they might better understand and appreciate the power that exists in yielding and receiving. It is all too easy for men to exaggerate or emphasize their masculine traits as a kind of emotional armor against which they protect themselves from what the world might seem to throw at them. Really all this ever has done is to insulate men even further from their natural selves. While seeming to protect them from the world what men might fear, what is really at work is how men have chosen to feel about the world and how that world might be at odds with their truer nature. So then the armoring really only serves to shield you against yourself, or your truer nature. A lot of this is learned behavior, so it follows that it can be unlearned as well.

A lot is thrust upon us here on earth, man and woman alike. We are taught from early ages how to be, what to like, and what we ought to believe. All of this is the product of culture, and culture is not the self, but a kind of collection of many selves that have gone before us that chose or valued things they thought were important. That is all. As a result, we take what others have fashioned and we try to make it into ourselves. The result is that some things work, and others do not. One thing that is becoming clear is that a lot of these cultural beliefs don’t suit us, not always.

I will point out that these learned behaviors are being instilled in us, supported, by men and women alike. I was once in a marriage where my wife, when hearing me express myself emotionally, would chide me saying, “This isn’t about you…” It was a quick way to express her discomfort at a quality that she believed was not a masculine trait. It is interesting because it was always okay for her to express how she felt without any pressure from me to do otherwise. But more importantly was how my son was raised up. She called him her “protector.” This is similar to calling a small boy a “little man.” We say these things often with swelling pride because we value certain qualities and want our children to take those on. We don’t understand sometimes how destructive these expectations are to children. A child does not know how to be a man, he is only three or four years of age and does not have the emotional means to handle what an adult does, nor should he. In the case of my son, when he was drafted into his protector status, when all you have everything is a nail. It turned out to be a quality that served to blind him in his life about the true nature of the relationships around him and how his Mother would later abuse his trust in her for less than noble reasons. The relationship fell apart with my then-wife when I stopped behaving in the old ways and simply was myself. Yes, it was a loss at the time, but it also meant that I gained my soul. I can’t tell you how difficult it is to pretend to be something that you aren’t. A large part of this had to do with a fundamental shift that was happening where I began to see the value in this receptive quality within myself. Not everyone is going to value it, and if they do not, they might just be the wrong kind of people to surround yourself with. It’s a hard lesson sometimes, but once learned you can do better and be with the kind of people who do value what you value as well. In fact the Law of Attraction will see to it that this happens, but only after you have changed your beliefs surrounding these programmed behaviors. You have to be aware of what is driving you if you are ever going to attract something different. We are all involved in our culture so by being aware of what we are doing to instill what anthropologists call “cultural knowledge” (or values) we can choose to do better in our raising of children (and ourselves).

For men, there is this particular idea that they have to be strong, and that means denying certain emotions or feelings. If you don’t believe this, just notice how often you ever see a man weeping over the sight of a puppy or a baby. There isn’t a lot of that kind of thing going on. You see, we have been taught as men that this is a sign of weakness. In fact, we have been taught that whatever a woman might experience or express is what a man ought never to engage in lest we become weak like women are weak. That of course is an assumption, a bias, a belief, that women are somehow weak. The problem with this way of thinking is that we know that women aren’t weak at all. The story is much bigger than that. Emotionally, women are much healthier in many ways than men are because they have permission to express and emote. Men do not, except for those emotions that are considered to be more masculine (aggressive ones usually). Now of course I am making a generalization, because not all men are like that, and the tide is indeed changing in a favorable direction currently, but there is more work to be done, and more to be aware of. I can explain this by asking the simple question: how many women in the last ten years have been involved in mass shootings? What do you think is at the root of the fact that men take guns and go out and shoot as many people as they can? Of course it is wrong to go out and kill people, it is a terrible thing to do to another human being. What I suspect is at the core of this kind of behavior is an inner rage, an inability to be seen or heard or to emote while at the same time the belief that the only way a real man can express himself is through aggressive behavior. These shootings are a manifestation of the most exaggerated qualities in male nature, but they do help to prove a point. Instead, expression is limited to violence because being tough is the only thing left for men. It doesn’t need to be this way.

Cultivating an ability to receive, to have a certain feminine quality in your awareness does not make you less of a man, it makes you more of a man. It allows you to relate to women better and it also allows you to feel your emotions instead of denying them. It is unnatural for men to deny their feelings. It is as unnatural for a man to deny his feelings as it is for a parent to call their two year old boy child their “little man” which is, of course, how these values are passed down to male boys who then grow up thinking that they have to be like men. The problem is that boy doesn’t really know how to be a man. It is unnatural. And yet, each year, there are parents all around the world who are calling their boys their “little men” and they do so with swelling pride because we have been taught, programmed, to value these qualities. So what the culture does not provide for you, you must learn to provide for yourself.

In all change, there is always the “threat” of not being accepted. We are all so programmed to value and to be triggered by certain behaviors that we see. Our bodies will respond to our inner beliefs about what manhood is when we see the programmed behaviors in others and ourselves running on automatic. We all have this programming, what it is the culture has told us masculinity and femininity is, and it all works automatically. You can change all of that, of course. You start by changing it in yourself. If you are a man, you begin by being courageous and cultivate this inner sensitivity. You learn to become a channel in your thinking. To know the greater mysteries of the universe you must receive. If you do receive, you can learn a lot and you can also appreciate the tenderness of women, the thoughtfulness of women, and the vulnerability that women can feel. Woman may be weaker than men, but it is not emotionally, but only outwardly. Weakness in this way is not a fault, not an article of shame, it is just how we are made and how we are made has a great purpose in a life so it should be respected, revered, even.

One thing that all of this does is it begins to erase in a man fears of incipient homosexuality. When this evaporates, the self is more open to acknowledge the larger truth of the self. This in turn can open you up to a still larger truth about all humans on the earth who are coming and going in this grand experiment in learning and growing here on earth. It can lead to a respect for all people and it begins to erase the divisions many people create that separate human from human.

It isn’t that masculinity is to be distrusted or torn down, but that in our past certain qualities have been exaggerated. You don’t need to exaggerate, you need only to explore and feel as fully as you can and allow yourself to go in feeling in places where perhaps you felt you weren’t allowed. You can begin this on your own as a kind of experiment. Consider that feeling is itself not weakness, and when you do that, you might actually see how you begin to dismantle a belief that might be within you without your having realized it. What I found when I did this was that there was this truly amazing amount of energy in consciousness that was now available to me that had not been available before. It was so good that I just never went back. I told myself that if someone tried to pull the old cultural strings on me, I just would not respond, I would resist being activated by that kind of cultural value which was outmoded and which tries to keep men in the old mode. The only way they have you is if you let them shame you or trigger you. The trigger only ever has power if you give it value. Leave it alone, let it be, let it fall away as you experiment with feeling and receiving. I can tell you that it will help you in meditative work and it will help in your life in surprising ways. There is nothing to be lost in doing this kind of thing inwardly.

When we are young we are soft and supple and as we age we often grow hard and stiffened. We aren’t made to be that way, and often beliefs about ourselves will stiffen us into unnatural postures and ways of feeling. Take what Lao Tzu said to heart. In Eastern practice the power in their martial arts is the degree to which they use feminine-like principles to overcome an opponent. You literally can use the force of another against him (or her) so that their force works against them. If you know the power in such things, you can begin to learn to cultivate an appreciation for the “other” which is also who you are because we are all just one family here when you get right down to it. There is nothing to oppose, and everything to nurture and build up. Men would do well to do more of that in themselves than the other things which have kept us locked in personal and mass conflict. There is no power in control, only brutality. There is no strength in war, only destruction and theft. These are not noble qualities, they are those of lower life. The masculine can be tempered with understanding and I suspect that this is what the world needs right now. And if a woman rejects you for being sensitive, take that as a sign that she herself has been programmed into a belief system that wont serve you. Just walk away. Do you really need someone to approve of you? Do you need love so bad that you will become someone else’s puppet on a string just so you will get showered with love? What kind of love does such a thing? It is surely a very pinched and distorted form of love.

When you cultivate this inner receptivity you can begin to see just how little as a man, as a person, that you really know. It makes a person humble in such a place as this. Don’t worry about others, just tend to yourself. You aren’t here to make the world into your image, you can just let the world do what it is doing. Live by example. If more people did this, the world would change in the right way, without coercion, without force, using only inspiration as the way that change takes place. This is the softer hand at work and it gives freewill its proper voice in the world. If something is worth doing then it will become apparent, you don’t have to force it. You inspire the change, and not everyone will be so inspired by you. This is natural. If your ego needs validation so badly that you must force your ideas on another, it might be that those ideas aren’t worth adopting if they must be adopted by force.

There is no loss in masculinity in doing this kind of work, nothing at all. What we might lose is the bias that exists against others different from us. It could soften chauvinism, and a sexist outlook. This alone would make the world, at least your corner of it, a better place. It might even make you into a better version of yourself, someone the world might just be in need of.

image of the human brain with strands of electricity on it.

So every now and again, this inner Presence does its thing when I am in the right kind of mind space. It always feels like someone is asking me to become part of a partner in crime….to go on this thought adventure….

So consider what it showed me. I have been writing about, as have others written about, how kundalini is at least in part the union of the opposites, two opposites that move into union. These opposites may very well be reflected in the two hemispheres of the brain as channels for cognition and then explode into something more when the two become-one, an idea that is pretty big amongst those who experience awakening and the resulting near-obsession that we can tend to have with inner union…divine union. But this little rascal in me opened a door recently and flashed that mischievous smile at me that told me I just had to follow it.

It showed me another dimension of all of this, which has had to do with research I have done over the years of the connection that exists with stored emotion being let go especially after kundalini is aroused. It’s as if the emotion is being released from the body. A close friend and massage therapist who knows energy work has many times worked on me and by pressing a spot on my body, caused an emotion to lift and release, gone forever, leaving me with a little blank spot and a little less reactivity or one less trigger. Okay, so this energetic presence is saying to look deeper at this quality. I’m not getting what it is pointing to, so it says, that as we wake up and as the two hemispheres activate in this new arrangement we call cosmic consciousness or what I used to call meta-mind (before I even knew this thing I had had a name), but that it then activates the body consciousness or intelligence that exists in each person. We don’t think of the body as having intelligence within materialistic science, but it turns out there is a LOT of information about it written in the East. In Zen Buddhism they say “the body thinks.” We say “What does your heart tell you?” and “What does your gut say?” All of these are a nod to body intelligence. Now we might at this point kind of roll our eyes a bit with that suggestion, but hang on a moment.

In recent research we have found that the human gut has as many neurons as the brain of the average house cat. Now I ask you, what is the gut doing with so many neurons? What’s more, the heart has them in a high concentration as do all of the major organs. The body or viscera has its own neurological system separate from the one that goes from the brain to the rest of the body that is called the vagus nerve. Researchers have found recently that there is more signal activity going from the brain from the heart than from the brain to the heart. Signal means information, and information implies intelligence. What gives?

So this presence is suggesting that this other “brain” is linked to the brain in our cranium during the process of awakening and that one reason why many report feeling these energetic blasts up the core of their bodies (raises his hand) is because this is the moment when this brain is brought along with the other two hemispheres into a greater unity. Then conversations I have had with people who have described their awakenings begin to make a kind of sense when they almost universally use terms to describe the experience of feeling things all the way down to the cellular level (some say atomic, but close enough). Is it possible that what we are experiencing is the linkage of this third brain into a larger consciousness and that this ties us more closely to our emotions which may well have some of their origin in the body itself? For as crazy as this may sound, we do have both anecdotal as well as established evidence that this may well be true.

In my hunt years ago for this intelligence I came across the work of researchers who gathered data from hundreds of organ recipients and found a high correlation of the recipients having what could only be described as the memories of the donor. In fact, in one case a child was able to identify the person who had killed the donor, which triggered the organ donation. The child was able to name and describe the person who had committed the murder. There are all kinds of stories similar to this one (okay, this was one of the most dramatic illustrations of memory retention in the organ) that researchers had collected. Now it is worth noting that some scientists view this area of study as being pseudoscience, but I find it to be something worthy of more study. I know for myself that my body has certainly exhibited and still exhibits some form of intelligence and awareness that is structurally different from what the brain offers, but still may make up part of our overall intelligence. If it does indeed do this, then it would be worth tapping into it for a host of reasons, many of which we might not even be able to anticipate at this point what they might even be.

My question then is this why those who awaken are able to “shake” off the trauma from the past because we are now more intimately connected with that part of the body, that the whole neural network is now aligned and “connected” by way of this inner alignment that pushes consciousness into a whole new arena of awareness? I ask the question. I’d be interested in your thoughts and experience pro or con. I don’t know what to think of this impish presence that takes me down these rabbit holes. Just had to put this down so I could get to sleep tonight.

Sweet dreams…

This. From Alan Watts. From me to you. I don’t always agree with these teachers, but Alan gets to a state of mind necessary for beginning meditation and how to get the mind to go calm so you can go deeper. It’s also an easy thing to listen to because of the imagery and music. Nonduality is for all of us. Let it happen…

Alan speaks about a type of consciousness that I have written about as a result of having experienced it directly without a teacher or a book to tell me about it, and it’s an important part of what awakening is. I say pay attention. I call it “particalized consciousness” and “waveform consciousness.” Alan calls it “spotlight” and “floodlight” consciousness. Bring that forward, focus more through the broader and you will begin to experience it if you learn how to emphasize that part of you. Now go watch that one, too!

Today we have a little-known document that describes what many scholars in the field of religious studies regard as an initiatory rite attributed to Jesus. It describes something that is being spoken of widely today amongst many who have themselves experienced awakening, which is the Ascension of Gaia. In this remarkable excerpt of the “Hymn of Jesus” it shows that in early Christianity they were describing a nearly identical phenomenon in operation within human consciousness in our present day amongst many (although not all) who have experienced awakening. From Chapter three of the Hymn of Jesus:

“The living Jesus answered and said : “Blessed is the man who has known these things. He has brought heaven down, he has lifted the earth and has sent it to heaven…”

What I find so interesting is that virtually no one that I have spoken to about the Gaia Ascension mythos today (most commonly described as “ascension”) knows anything about this obscure, but incredibly important document. Nor are they aware that we have been here before, talking about the same phenomenological concept separated by close to two thousand years.

The document in question is the Bruce codex which contains Coptic, Arabic and Ethiopic manuscripts and was found in upper Egypt by a Scottish traveler, James Bruce in about 1769. The first translations of the text began in the mid-1800’s. The passages I include are based on the translation of Carl Schmidt, and republished with additional contributions by Violet MacDermot.

This edition of The Bruce Codex is long out of print, but may be found in research libraries. It is also included, with material related to the find and its translation and other particulars HERE.

What interests me so much about the Hymn of Jesus is how it is clearly a series of initiatory rites with words spoken much like how a mantra is used, which is used to alter consciousness in order that one may move into that state where one awakens or is open to the same level that the Master has achieved. Indeed, the codex is consistent in how it is structured in this way.

Without getting into deep theological debate and the history associated with early Christian belief, most scholars see works of this type as not having been written by the actual witnesses themselves and that they came later as a result of stories that were told about Jesus and his life. This is as true for the “Gnostics” to whom this codex is attributed as it is for the more literalist Orthodox wing that ultimately won the “war” of ideas and belief to become the one that was most widely accepted. It is worth pointing out that all of the synoptic gospels were written not by witnesses but were in their earliest form, anonymous. The church later attributed them to certain writers, and they all were written some time after Jesus was no longer on the scene. Also, there are synoptic gospels that do not agree with one another also on some very important points. Discrepancies, yes, and most are small, but others are bigger and they affect how scholars look at these books in terms of the belief that these were eyewitness accounts (which they were not despite how the Church has represented this point for centuries now). We know, for instance, how certain conversations could not have taken place in some gospels because of how Aramaic was structured and used, that some word usage was specific to Greek as a language, which is what was used to write the first gospels (instead of Aramaic, which was the native tongue of the people involved in the Jesus stories). We have no copies of these Gospels in Aramaic.

We know stories were added to the synoptics gospels (most likely by scribes) and we also know people were forging documents, like a number of letters by Paul for instance, all of which remain in the New Testament to this day. Everyone was taking the Jesus story and running with it and inserting their own ideas in order to push this movement in the direction THEY wanted, and this is true for ALL branches of Christianity. In fact, as writings get farther away from Jesus’s life tend to have the biggest and hardest to believe miracles in them (and are not included in the New Testament). They just kept getting bigger and bigger as we go along. All of this to say that what was once called “The Way” was subject to interpretation with all comers. What is interesting is the depth and the truth realized in writings like what is found in the Bruce Codex, as they are themselves depictions of real human experiences that do describe aspects of the enlightened state. Different perhaps from the New Testament that you grew up with, but at one time were treasured by early Christians (and bear close similarities to other traditions that had some of the most sophisticated understandings of enlightenment in the world despite the fact that these early Christians had no known contact with those other cultures from the East).

With that, and against that backdrop, the first chapters of the Hymn of Jeou (Jesus).


The First Book of JEOU

I have loved you. I have wanted life to be given you; the Living Jesus, who knows the truth.

Chapter 1


This is the book of the gnoses of the invisible God, by means of the hidden mysteries which show the way to the chosen race, leading in refreshment to the life of the Father – in the coming of the Saviour , of the deliverer of souls who receive themselves the Word of life which is higher than all life – in the knowledge of the living Jesus, who has come forth through the Father from the aeon of light at the completion of the Pleroma – in the teaching, apart from which there is no other, which the living Jesus has thaught to his apostles, saying:  “This is the teaching in which dwells the whole knowledge.” The living Jesus answered and said to his disciples: “Blessed is he who has crucified the world, and who has not the world to crucify him.” The apostles answered with one voice, saying :  “O Lord, teach us the way to crucify the world, that it may not crucify us, so that we are destroyed and loose our lives” The living Jesus answerd : “He who has crucified it is he who has found my word and has fulfilled it according to the will of him who has sent me.”

Chapter 2


The apostles answered, saying : ” Speak to us, O Lord, that we may hear thee. We have followed thee with our whole hearts. We have left behind father and mother, we have left behind vineyards and fields, we have left behind goods and the greatness of kings, and we have followed thee, so that thou shouldst teach us to know the life of thy father who has sent thee” The living Jesus answered and said : “The life of my Father is this : that you receive your soul from the race of understanding mind, and that it ceases to be earthly and becomes understanding through that which I say to you in the course of my discourse, so that you fulfil it and are saved from the archon of this aeon and his persecutions, to which there is no end. But you, my disciples, hasten to receive my word with certaintiy so that you know it, in order that the archon of this aeon may not fight with you – this one who did not find any commandment of his in me – so that you also, my apostles, fulfil my word in relation to me, and I myself make you free, and you become whole through a freedom in which there is no blemish. As the Spirit of the comforter (Parakleiton) is whole, so will you also be whole, through the freedom of the spirit of the Holy Comforter.”

Chapter 3


All the apostles, Matthew and John, Philip and Bartholomew and James, answered with one voice, saying:


“O Lord Jesus, thou who livest, whose goodness extends over those who have found thy wisdom and thy form in which thou gavest light ; O light-giving Light that enlightened our hearts until we received the light of life; O true Word, that through gnosis teaches us the hidden knowledge of the Lord Jesus, the living one.”


The living Jesus answered and said : “Blessed is the man who has known these things. He has brought heaven down, he has lifted the earth and has sent it to heaven, and he has become the Midst for it is nothing.” The apostles answered, saying :   “Jesus , thou living one, Lord , interprete for us how we may bring heaven down, for we have followed thee in order that thou shouldst teach us the true light.” The living Jesus answered and said : “The Word which existed in heaven before the earth came into existence – this which is called the world – but you, when you know my Word, you will bring heaven down, and it will dwell in you. Heaven is the invisible Word of the Father; but when you know these things you will bring heaven down. As to sending the earth up to heaven, I will show you what it is , that you may know it : to send the earth to heaven is that he who hears the word of gnosis has ceasedto have the understanding mind of man of earth, but has become a man of heaven. His understanding mind has ceased to be earthly, but it has become heavenly. Because of this you will be saved from the archon of this aeon, and he will become the Midst, because it is nothing.”   The living Jesus said again :  “When you become heavenly you will become the Midst because it is nothing, for the .. . .. rulers and the wicked powers (exousiai) will you and they will envy you because you have known me, because I am not from the world, and I do not resemble the rulers and the powers (exousiai) and all the wicked ones. They do not come from me. And furthermore he who (is born) in the flesh of unrighteousness has no part in the Kingdom of my Father, and also he who me according to the flesh has no hope Kingdom of God the Father.”

Chapter 4


The Apostles answered with one voice, they said : “Jesus ,  O Lord, are we born of the flesh, and known thee according to the flesh? Tell us, O Lord, for we are troubled.” The living Jesus answered and said to his apostles : ” I do not speak of the flesh in which you dwell, but the flesh of and non-understanding which exists in ignorance, which leads astray many from the of my Father.” The apostles answered the words of the living Jesus, they said: “Tell us how non-understanding happens, that we may beware of it, lest we should go . . . . . . .” The living Jesus answered and said : ” one who bears my virginity and my . . . . . and my garment, without understanding and knowing me, and blasphemes my name, I have . . . . to destruction. And furthermore he has become an earthly son because he has not known my word with certainty – these which the Father spoke, so that I myself should teach those who will know me at the completion of the pleroma of him who sent me.” The Apostles answered and said : “O Lord Jesus, thou living one, teach us the completion, and it suffices us.” And he said : “The word which I give to you yourselves….”


Chapter three is, I think, incredibly relevant to the Ascension mystery as it is being spoken and written about today amongst those who write about the “ascension” phenomenon. Is it not true that this is being seen by many people today as a global phenomenon in which the earth, we sense, is being brought to a finer vibration, with the implication being that Gaia itself is being transformed as well as life upon it? Or is it just us? And how far removed is this idea with the ideas contained in chapter three which describe the process of bringing earth into heaven and heaven into the earth? What kind of change would this represent? Is this simply too big of a leap for us to even imagine what a world like that might look like so we speak about it in mythic terms, long on theory but perhaps short on facts? Perhaps new turnings are always like this; it cannot be known until it has been created because so many factors depend on what are selected which will determine what that recipe ultimately brings us. While some argue against freewill, perhaps this is our one possible proof of that freewill, which is that the outcome might not always be foreseeable until we have acted, something that is an act that is collective, a collective leap into the unknown.

Scholars will likely point out that this writing was created some time after the death of Jesus since the argument can (perhaps rightly) be made that it was possible that Jesus himself did not know while he lived that he would in fact be crucified. While modern Christians would argue that through the prophetic tradition he would have known all along that he would come to be a sacrifice on the cross, careful examination of the Old Testament documents suggests that the passage in Psalms which most point to as evidence of a crucifixion show evidence of having been altered (Psalm 22:16). The issue at hand with this passage is that the Jewish version of the book says “lion” where the Christian version says “pierced” which results in a completely different meaning. In the Jewish version David is surrounded by “dogs” and “lions” who are at his hands and feet, but the Christian version reads that dogs compass him, they pierce his hands and feet. Lion was changed to pierce and, as the argument goes, it completely changes the meaning of the passage from David being savaged by his enemies to his waxing prophetic. The result being, that someone forged this passage in early Christianity in order to support the appearance of prophecy from the old tradition to the new. There is a lot of disagreement on this one point, however, as one document in the Qumran discovery in the 1940’s (and which scholars think were just prior to Christ’s ministry) has “pierced” in one version of Psalms. But, as Rabbi Singer has pointed out, this passage is not mentioned in any of the synoptic gospels nor is it mentioned by Paul not even once, who was himself often quoting Jewish scripture, and if such a prophecy such as this existed, he would undoubtedly have been mentioning it as proof of Jesus being tied to Messianic tradition. This only comes along later, Singer argues, probably in the second or third centuries. At any rate, as a result, this may mean that this hymn as written probably was a later creation. It may or may not have been directly tied to Jesus. It is possible that there was an original document that then got “embroidered” with the crucifixion story added in. What it does show is that these ideas of how we can bring heaven and earth closer through an inner act of inner transformation or awakening were present at an early phase in the development of Christianity. While these particulars are not themselves clear, what is clear for me is that this concept of bringing heaven and earth together was in development and it shows a keen awareness of how an aspect of evolution may very well operate when dealing with human consciousness. I take this side track into the architecture of the Christ experience to point out that for the Gnostics, while Jesus was incredibly important as the way-shower, they took the ball and ran with it. For them, the apostolic age did not end as the Orthodoxy had decreed, after the first initial group had died out. A gift had been given in the form of awareness, a form of knowledge called gnosis such that what they were calling “Christ” could be conveyed to others who then would become Christs (this was the case made in the Valentinian School and the Gospel of Philip spells this out unambiguously). As a result, the gnostic production continued while the Orthodox became static in the sense that no new documents were produced (after Act, some letters, and John’s Revelation).

In my personal experience I was aware of acting as a channel for a fire from heaven which was conducted by the masculine while the feminine acted as the receptive agent which was involved in the other side of the creation of phenomenon which is the nurturing side, the “bringing forth” of the resulting mixture which comes about as a result of “the two” that actually create the divine third, or Christ. One could not operate without the other, and while the masculine could be seen as initiatory, the feminine also was initiatory as well in that without her, the process of synthesis to a higher awareness was not possible. The two existed as a single unit, a co-creative matrix where one is not above the other, but each were co-equal and necessary.

I will point out that the Gnostics spoke of the trinity as a family unit consisting of a masculine and feminine quality that met and came into union “in the bridal chamber” and it was out of their ecstatic union that a third quality, a child, was produced. This was the Christ. The upshot in all of this was that this was an inside job, not something that one seeks outwardly. Even Paul, who describes his encounter with the light on his journey to Damascus says “when it was the good pleasure of God … to reveal his son in me” he does not say “to” but “in me.” It was a quality that was already there. He also says that he was anointed (initiated) by the “Christ that liveth in me,” he does not mention Jesus (he didn’t meet Jesus in the flesh). This was not something that he was given, it was something that he was made aware of. This, by the way, is how most of the Eastern doctrines treat enlightenment, which is a state or potential that is in all people. The Buddha, which we often tend to think of as a person, is in fact a term referring to a quality that is in all people. “Buddha” is a field of awareness and everyone has a Buddha within, slumbering until awakened. In like manner, Paul associates this quality with Christ as something that is revealed as existing in him. “For neither did I receive it from man, nor was I taught it, but it came to me through revelation of Jesus Christ” (Galatians).

Gnosis.org has an excellent collection of writings on the topic of Gnosticism. It represents the “lost” story of Christianity. While the orthodoxy will say otherwise, the information contained in these old texts supplies insight into the nature of enlightenment and forms the body of knowledge that always seemed to me growing up to have been missing from the church, which is how to achieve union with the divine. Hard to read, the writings were shrouded in language intended to obscure their meaning, these were texts intended for a select audience, for people who were being “perfected” or “prepared” or “the elect.” This is what both Jesus and Paul referred to as “maturity.”

When Jesus speaks to his disciples about not speaking to Gentiles and others outside their group, we may well have been seeing the secret doctrine at work. What I wonder is why is it so hard to consider that this indeed may have been the case? With so many awakenings today which often include the elements contained in those secret teachings, it’s hard to see that this wasn’t happening and that the new generation of Christs today have managed to achieve something that in the past took years to achieve, if ever.

Hemeticism most likely was developed during the first to third Centuries A.D. It is an outlook associated with the Hermetic writings which are writing in Greek. Much of the work is concerned with alchemy, astrology, and occult sciences, but there is a philosophical Hermetic literature as well. The writings appear to be an amalgam of Greek philosophy, particularly Platonic, with other elements. As a result of this, Hermeticism tended to gain broad interest among numerous groups in antiquity, such as the Arabs and Persians, and early Christians as well. Among those who believed that the works were much older, those include Lactantius, who, writing in the forth Century taught that the writings belonged to an Egyptian seer who lived after Moses and who had visions that improved on the Genesis story and that anticipated, prophetically, the coming of Jesus in his story of the “son of God.” Augustine, while he did not approve of the “magic” of the Heretic tradition wrote that he believed that they belonged to antiquity (and, it could be argued he did so because it lent power to the idea that Jesus’s rise was foreseen, even if by other than the Jewish prophetic tradition). By the time of the Renaissance, Hermeticism and its books were being widely translated, read, and commented on. It has had a strong effect on Alchemy and thus, on the rise of Chemistry, too, although it can be well argued that the point of alchemy was not to truly make lead into gold but that this was an effort to forge a new level of awareness in humankind, whose effects were analogous.

I find the work tied to Hermes Trismegistus to be very similar in some respect to the phenomenon of awakening, which involved meditation, a sudden breaking through the sensory barrier into a numinous state where a deeper knowing is attained. Additionally, it is interesting to see how the soul is described as containing both aspects of male and female in them, a strong marker in the awakening process.

The work begins with the following series of passages:

1. It chanced once on a time my mind was meditating on the things that are, my thought was raised to a great height, the senses of my body being held back – just as men who are weighed down with sleep after a fill of food, or from fatigue of body.

Methought a Being more than vast, in size beyond all bounds, called out my name and saith: What wouldst thou hear and see, and what hast thou in mind to learn and know?

2. And I do say: Who art thou?

He saith: I am Man-Shepherd (Poemandres), Mind of all-masterhood; I know what thou desirest and I’m with thee everywhere.

3. [And] I reply: I long to learn the things that are, and comprehend their nature, and know God. This is, I said, what I desire to hear.

He answered back to me: Hold in thy mind all thou wouldst know, and I will teach thee.

4. E’en with these words His aspect changed, and straightway, in the twinkling of an eye, all things were opened to me, and I see a Vision limitless, all things turned into Light – sweet, joyous [Light]. And I became transported as I gazed.

Later in the work the following observation is made:

24. Well hast thou taught me all, as I desired, O Mind. And now, pray, tell me further of the nature of the Way Above as now it is [for me].

To this Man-Shepherd said: When the material body is to be dissolved, first thou surrenderest the body by itself unto the work of change, and thus the form thou hadst doth vanish, and thou surrenderest thy way of life, void of its energy, unto the Daimon. The body’s senses next pass back into their sources, becoming separate, and resurrect as energies; and passion and desire withdraw unto that nature which is void of reason.

This passage is interesting because it is similar to what many works within the Hindu tradition that state that upon awakening the awareness pulls away from the physical sensory awareness to that of an energetic one, those inner senses which are part of the larger or higher self.  Here, a relationship is set up where the physical senses appear to be described as being a subset, or a deeper root of inner sensory awareness, which is where the root of being can be found or known.  One of the notable outcomes or symptoms of awakening is the rise of those abilities which are called siddhi.  These are described in a number of Hindu texts including the Panchatantra, The Yoga Sutra of Pantanjali, and others. 

In IX On Thought And Sense, the following statement is made which those who have experienced awakening might find common ground: 

For this cause they who Gnostic are, please not the many, nor the many them. They are thought mad and laughted at; they’re hated and despised, and sometimes even put to death.

What is most apparent to me when reading this body of work is how it varies in many ways with other traditions, yet contain elements that are often very common.  It is what you might expect when reading about the same observed phenomenon when it is taking place in a different culture or time. It can help to add breadth to your understanding while also providing new thoughts in a Hellenistic/Judaic amalgam with roots about as old as Christianity (and most notably Gnostic Christianity which shows clear signs of being aware of this body of work. You can study this body of work more by finding them on sacredtexts.com

 

Cosmos Composite

As a Westerner who had no goal of awakening kundalini, I came to it without the underpinnings of belief or practice beyond my own self-fashioned meditation technique I had practiced for years. No guru, no teacher…

I remember reading somewhere that upon awakening one becomes a yogi. The first awakening dream that I had had me taking a shortcut through a town which I took and found a house that looked like a cross between a Shinto temple and an arts and crafts style house. House is for me, the self. In it sprang two streams of water in the main front room, one on the left and one on the right. The waters were, I would find, the “two” currents within consciousness that would later merge into one, via the sushumna nadi. Water which had light within it. I would see the three people who would be part of my first four years of my awakening journey there, bathing in these waters. Once awakening came, it was as though I was opened to a stream of inner knowing about just about anything I was interested in. As I got situated in this “new normal” and began to learn more about my new state, I would from time to time find things that felt like they were….off about the subject that some teachers had addressed. It was interesting to see how ideas would emerge from the popular culture about the phenomenon, too. They sounded good, but they didn’t land well with me (but what did I know, right?). Of course, these people certainly knew what they were talking about, but an inner prompting said otherwise to me. As I began to question these things, I had someone enter my life who was both friend and teacher. Her approach was different from just about everyone I knew who was on to awakening. She had counseled hundreds of people in her practice, helping people overcoming some of the greatest challenges of their lives. She literally worked miracles with her clients. Some of them were impromptu meetings with neighbors who had come over to say hi and there we would be in a healing session involving a woman releasing a past trauma that had kept her unknowingly tangled in herself. And just like that, she trotted off into the night, ready to take the ferry to the mainland the next morning, transformed from a hurdle that now no longer laid in her path. “What just happened here?” I would ask and she would smile and say, “Welcome to my world.”

In another situation while over the phone she performed what I have called a “reset” of my energy. Up until this time I had familiarity with the phenomenon of “painbody” but after the reset, it was as if I had not known the degree to which I had this in my system. While the effects of this “reset” were pretty miserable, it also made me more aware of my own energy. It was as if I was gifted with a keener awareness of my own inner system than before. While I winced through my days, this new awareness also focused me on my own challenges in a clear-eyed way. It also put a fire under me to learn how to make myself more available to the energy which was there remaking me. It worked: I entered into a period where I released hundreds of blocks that had been driven down into my subconscious. It also accelerated changes in how I acted, reacted, and felt. I was returning to a truer version of myself. While this meant for me that some of my relationships would go away with a fair degree of malice on the side of those who rejected this new me, it also helped to illustrate to me what happens when we think we can make deals with the world that go against our deeper more authentic selves.

She was the most gifted person psychically I have known and when she explained her gifts she said how she was not born with the filters most have in place. She said that she had to feel her way through her life. When she did that, she was always guided to just the right place, the right situation where she needed to be. It seemed to me that it left her without an idea of a plan in the day to day. She emphasized to me how important it was to learn to feel, to be more aware of how to feel more deeply in one’s life than to be so rational in it. She explained that by being both clear within and being more connected to feeling, one could navigate this new kind of life much easier. By remaining stuck in the rational mind, all sorts of ideas a person could glom onto and take as true because the rational doesn’t have the same capacity for emotional intelligence that the feeling side of the self has. The problem, though, we look askance at feeling as some kind of emotional wilderness.

I have seen how the rational mind is that part of our brain that has specialized for all things linear and process-based. Language emerges there, the ability to identify the things that are most immediately important in the moment or the process. This is where abstractions emerge, and for as helpful as they are, abstractions are one step removed from what is real. The left brain, lacking feeling, can draw from larger concepts smaller subsets for use outside of a larger context. It isn’t that this isn’t important. It is in fact what has given birth to language, to logic, and to all kinds of technologies all dependent on process-based methods, including knowing order and placement. Language makes no sense when it lack order and strict rules. The same is true for many computer languages, mathematical processes, for example. We made it to the moon using this part of our minds. What it does lack is the bigger picture. This part of the mind we call masculine. Concrete, linear, rational, and largely unfeeling. I saw how the ego that we tend to know best springs from this part of the mind.

When we awaken, it is said that kundalini is a “goddess” a feminine aspect within ourselves, regardless of whether you are male or female. It is less a literal feminine aspect as it is a quality in all of us, be we male or female. We do, though, connect into the feminine through this aspect in each of us. It brings all of us closer to this part within the human family. Two streams rise upward, some downward, merging in the center of the sushumna nadi. It is here that one finds the meta-view, the big picture, the holistic and nonlinear presence of mind. It has its own form of ego, but it is so large that it is wide like the sky. It is not easily upset like her “masculine” ego counterpart is. In this part of the mind, there is emotional intelligence so this ego could be called more mature, less upset by the vagaries of human events. This is the realm of the superego. It is also here where we navigate through cosmic mind by way of a depth of feeling and awareness that the other side of our being does not possess. While we can build things and follow processes through the left mind, it cannot give us the broadness of view to see those things that are products of its own creative output in context with the world as a living breathing whole. This is, I think, one reason why we as humans can create technologies that destroy our world without any awareness of how this could even be a possibility. We often think how cruel this is, but I tend to think that it is a lack of awareness that this part of our minds simply does not possess. This is the wrong kind of “single-mindedness” that humans so often have that does so much bad in the world. The “Shakti” part of us is what has this kind of awareness.

I think we often think that feeling is the irrational side of us, something to be held at arm’s length. What I have found is that feeling is simply a capacity. Feeling is not the same as emotion. Emotion operates much as thought. We choose our thoughts just as we choose our emotions. The only difference is that most people are driven by their emotions and don’t know the degree to which they do choose them. In the same way that we have thoughts at the subconscious level, the same processes that drive emotion often emerge from the same place. In a very important way, this is what forms the “veil” so often talked about that begins to be pulled away during the process of awakening. What remains, though, is an intact “architecture” of subconscious activity and patterns that remain to be taken apart, cleared, cleansed from awareness, be they in full awareness or buried in the subconscious by the effect that kundalini brings to free them.

In the book “The Metaphoric Mind: A Celebration of Creative Consciousness” by Bob Samples, the author quotes Albert Einstein and in the process, makes a summary of the quote that many attribute to Einstein himself (and which is a very good lead-in to what I am pointing to here). Regardless, the quote and the summary suits my discussion here. The first part is Einstein and the part in bold is Samples:

The metaphoric mind is a maverick. It is as wild and unruly as a child. It follows us doggedly and plagues us with its presence as we wander the contrived corridors of rationality. It is a metaphoric link with the unknown called religion that causes us to build cathedrals — and the very cathedrals are built with rational, logical plans. When some personal crisis or the bewildering chaos of everyday life closes in on us, we often rush to worship the rationally-planned cathedral and ignore the religion. Albert Einstein called the intuitive or metaphoric mind a sacred gift. He added that the rational mind was a faithful servant. It is paradoxical that in the context of modern life we have begun to worship the servant and defile the divine.

I have come to see that the left “masculine” mind only works when it is a servant to the broader mind of the feminine, which is the right hemisphere, not the other way around. We have for centuries run our bodies and minds in a backwards fashion from what is most natural for us, and the result has been great short-sightedness. And while it is tempting to ascribe this to the patriachy, it has become a part of most everyone’s way of thinking and being regardless of its source. It has belonged to all of us (even as many have chaffed against it). This is a human issue and we exit it through doing and being differently (but not for the sake of “different” but through a native state that can be known to all and which often lies hidden within each of us).

Rationality cuts us off from the great ocean of our awareness and depth of feeling. It is in feeling that we connect with the inner compass within. We all know what is right and what is wrong but through the rational, we often explain it away or make deals or think that this is how we must behave in order to “get along” in this world. I know I thought this way once, but with awakening, there has been a steady unwinding of my own beliefs and inner programming. Instead of being just rational, I took the advice of my friend and began feeling my way through it all. I can say that while you might not know the “plan” in its entirety, our own actions in the moment when advanced by our feeling selves allows the correct plan to become manifest. It isn’t like it comes freshly born the moment we awaken, either. It is instead a process, and to allow it to happen by bowing down in humility to this greater self, is the fastest and most effective means I have seen to reach a more enlightened, inclusive, state. I can’t even say that enlightenment comes at the moment of awakening, but is instead a journey through a deepening of awareness that comes to the degree that our fingers uncurl from those pieces of baggage that we reflexively clutch by our sides and hold in our hearts.

I am not fond of quoting teachers, but since I have already quoted Einstein, I will mention how Taisen Deshimaru, the Zen master who explained the workings of cosmic mind. One reaches this state of cosmic mind not by seeking to clutch it, but to wait for it with an openness of mind. He explained that as long one does this, all of the sand of all the deserts will flow through your hand. “Try to grasp it, and you only get a little bit of grit.”

This is not the work of the rational mind at all. It is made more difficult that language springs from the part of the brain that has no capacity to really comprehend this cosmic mind at all. Words are themselves a very poor way, an extremely awkward way, to go about expressing what it is. The rational linear mind cannot begin to grasp the enormity of what the nonlinear more feminine side of our consciousness can. It is perhaps one reason why so much teaching along these lines involve a look, the movement of the body, the tone in the voice, and a presence in the room which transcends all reason or logic. This is because this part of us defies what our species has created thus far in terms of understanding. The understanding of the awakened mind is a quantum leap beyond the rational, and it must be. The left brain must remain in awe if it can….spinning stories that only tell half of the content contained within it (or less). We live in a very small circumscribed reality fence. We don’t know what lies beyond that fence. Much of what is in our cultures have been designed to keep us in that fence. I don’t see it as any sort of conspiracy except one of ignorance. We can break free from this. While it can also break through some old trusted beliefs and show them to be based on a limited understanding, the result is that a much bigger picture emerges.

The simplest manner in which to go forward is to learn to cultivate feeling. Even if it seems like it might be messy or scary to you, it is the genuine path forward in my experience. You might not always hit the bullseye every time when you do this, but as you find where you were off and where you were right on, you will learn your way. If you are like me, and you are interested in gathering data about the experience, you ask questions and see if what was being sensed remotely has a basis in reality (instances of feeling a person’s thoughts, or seeing scenes from a distance, for example, all of which are some outcomes of the awakened state). As I have done this I have been able to see quite clearly where I have had accurate intuitions or perceptions that go beyond the five physical senses and dip into the realm of the mind and its ability to know what is beyond itself. Instead of senses, you use the portal of feeling. It seems that the more we can relate to this type of material, the more successful or the greatest “hits” are. Until you begin doing this kind of work and inquiry, you might feel like you are all thumbs or it may feel unfamiliar to you.

It will feel like feeling yourself in a dark room at first. It was for me. But then I found that I could feel my way through that room through my inner senses. I learned by testing my perceptions in this inner room that my perceptions were often highly detailed and amazingly on the mark. There is a world within each of us in which half of ourselves have been hidden from our own view. Cultivating this side of ourselves also cultivates the power of intuition, and this is itself based in feeling. There is a reason for this that has everything to do with what happens when you stare at a blank page of paper or are in a dark room of the mind where you believe that you are blind. By feeling and feeling clearly and not just inserting what you think needs to be there, you are in fact opening up to a latent ability that resides in all of us. The result of this work? I can only speak for myself. I have felt for a very long time that these inner senses are what we use beyond this one life and we carry them into countless lives and find them manifesting themselves in different ways. Here, we speak of five physical senses, but these senses are a subset of many senses that we have in consciousness. Why it is that most people are cut off from these inner senses is itself a story, and part of it is told and known by tapping into our capacity to feel for surely that is where these senses emerge, the inner ones. They do defy what we currently think we know about material reality, or what the mainstream does, that is. While they can often be fickle or seemingly unreliable at first, continued work with your own mind and body and the blocks that you still have all serve to also block them from your own conscious awareness, or can often make you second guess yourself when they do not always work perfectly 100 percent of the time. When we are clearer, they are more easily accessible. By clear I mean not interfering with them through the beliefs that we still hold that serve to limit them.

In time you will likely find yourself “feeling” your way through everything, and more often than not, you will find that for reasons you might not have known at the time, you were right in your inner sensing. This includes every possible situation and event, even those in the future. Slowly that veil or filter falls away to the degree that you learn to use this part of yourself. It can take time to learn how to do this, but like how fish know where to go to spawn in the same waters where they were born, you also know how to navigate the waters of your own consciousness, perhaps first with trepidation and uncertainty, but then more and more boldly. What you do now and over the years accrues to your own self and cannot be taken away. All of this is within our capacities as human beings. it is a birthright that has been forgotten. It is also a birthright that in some cases will be treated in superstitious ways by the “believers” among us that this is somehow demonic, evil, unnatural, or bad. This, I contend, is how humans have inoculated themselves against discovering the rich bed of awareness that is available to all of us. While some will be better at it than others, studies have shown that every person tested thus far has some degree of second sight or inner knowing about things they could not have known anything about. Personally, I think what makes the difference here is the degree to which a person can cause the mind to go blank. This is not something most people feel comfortable with, but is described by genuine psychics. By doing this, they also describe feeling as though they are tuning in some other wavelength or “channel” of information. They are able to get the information through the feeling self, that part that is expertly capable of “assembling” the information streaming in in a coherent and understandable reconstruction that is intelligible to both themselves and to others.

When I look at the cramped quarters that people lives in in their own minds, I see how much they are governed by their unacknowledged beliefs, I see how limited they have allowed themselves to be. I was once like that, and I no doubt may still have some beliefs still lurking in the shadows that might still be serving to limit me along these lines. People often they feel estranged from nature because they are themselves a part of all nature but they have become distrustful for one reason or another. There is this natural self within that includes a balance of the two sides and when those two are allowed to merge into a unity, they form a level of ongoing bliss that is hard to believe is even possible. While I do feel all of this can be explained physiologically, I also know that it is sustained in the same way that a tight-wire walker is able to balance on the wire and more forward, never going too far to one side or the other. This is a balance of the two, a very specific form of balance, and it seems nature prefers it and will reward you greatly for finding it. It may not sound scientific for me to say, “just feel it” but the thing is, the feeling side already knows. It doesn’t need to be taught. It is already immensely capable. It knows. What needs to happen is for you to acknowledge what is already there within. The yogis and yoginis have been saying for a very long time that kundalini is not something that you get but is instead something that you already are. Our awakenings, then, may well be a conscious recognition of something that had not occurred to us until the moment that the floodgates seemed to open all on their own (which they most likely didn’t, you just weren’t cognizant of what it was at the time that catalyzed the change that seemed to “bring it on”).

Feeling is of immense importance. Don’t be troubled when you allow yourself the luxury of doing so. When you do, you will no doubt find a closet full of skeletons. Yes, there will be intervening feelings or emotions that you will have to navigate through first. Cast them aside, turn them out, looking at each one and forgiving yourself for allowing them to be there in the first place. Yes, it is likely that there is a lot of buried energy there and it can go back a very long time.

I have read of accounts where people began to suspect that the energy was satanic or dark. I have observed that the truth is perhaps a little less dramatic. Instead, it is our own subsumed junk and it needs to be dug out of the psyche by giving it expression. “Give it expression? Are you crazy??” What I have found and what many others are also finding, is that when you give it a voice, especially when it is repressed, its force bleeds away. The scary lion becomes a meek mouse. This is how all material that is pushed down comes back up. You let it up to let it out. Just by reaching the air, it disperses. The real problem is in keeping it down where it remains active and creates all sorts of problems for us by “running the show” so to speak. Perhaps you have seen this in yourself where you are triggered by something someone says and you react in an over the top manner, only later asking yourself why you reacted so passionately. This is what this material does. But unlike those who would push the emotion back down, you can allow it to break the surface and bleed itself of its energy, after which there is this reintegration that often takes place that is the heart of healing. It isn’t enough to just talk about it and acknowledge it; allowing it to break to the surface of your awareness so that you can see it once and for all is to me the lost aspect of how to heal. Many are experiencing this kind of healing today and they are doing so without a therapist but with a wisdom and awareness native to all of us. The more you do it, the more it shows itself. Anyone can do this, and yes, you have to have a good sound tether to reality.

This is an awareness as humans we seem to either have lost, or are so uncomfortable with doing, that it isn’t something that is in most people’s wheel house. Certainly this is what talk therapy is built around, but when you begin to make a deep connection to the subconscious, a link with it, more and more material can be released which accrues to ones own sense of peace and inner stability. Slowly, bit by bit, those dark closets of self, the shadow lands, will become full of light and the self will be seen less as one strange annex of self after another and more a unified self with less reason to be so sliced up and divided within itself. By being more at ease with feeling you will be better able to navigate these issues.

In the same way that the feminine has been pushed down and out of the world stage for eons, so too has our more intuitive abilities been subsumed and not give voice. While I think that developing the rational side was the easiest and most obvious part of ourselves to work on over the ages, it wasn’t something that needed to be done at the expense of our other more mystical cosmic side. What I hope is that we are entering a period where people who are more free than ever to be themselves (men and women both), that we will see an expansion of our abilities as a race emerge more and more. I think that awakenings are an outcome of a liberalization of human behavior, in essence, people being free to just be themselves and not shackled by societal norms. While doing this may cause the pendulum to swing to extremes, it also frees a lot of people to be at ease with aspects of themselves that they had not been able to acknowledge.

When I awakened I was keenly aware of two qualities in my consciousness that were responsible for the transcendent state of awareness that is a feature of awakening. It felt like how two materials when kept separate were ineffectual, which when put together, set off a chemical reaction that begins transforming the self. The more they moved into a state of union, the more powerful the effect. All of my notions about how I thought things were went out the window. I also realized that THIS was what I had been searching for my whole life. I had finally found it. What came, I suppose, was this missing element within me that I had kept at bay and that every person keeps at bay, which is the more feminine feeling side of ourselves. When that part emerges, so much changes.

…feeling is in fact a super intelligence that is designed to deal with the transcendent.

My advice to you is to cultivate this more feminine side that we all possess. It isn’t literally female, but it is enough of it to bring greater awareness to both women of the importance of their feminine natures and it will aid men in beginning to understand the benefits of cultivating the more feeling side of themselves while also having greater empathy for their female counterparts. Feeling may seem at first glance to be nebulous or vague, but what I have found is that feeling is in fact a super intelligence that is designed to deal with the transcendent. And if it might seem unimportant to you now, the big picture is key to knowing our place in the order, in being able to experience how we are connected to everything else, and how we exist beyond this one self, this one life and this one world. It is the path to awe and it is also where the great inspired minds go in order to glimpse the next big discovery. We tend to think that we cannot tap into knowledge or information that we ourselves have not learned before, that everything we know is what we have picked up as we have read and experienced in life. I am here to tell you that there is another side to the coin, and while it may seem elusive at first, it can be cultivated as you learn how to swim in its limitless waters. It isn’t “magic” and it isn’t “woo-woo” but is instead poorly understood. When we investigate the unknown, it goes from mysterious to a normal facet of our world. We don’t need to languish in superstitious thinking anymore.

©Parker Stafford

The mystique of enlightenment tantalizes us with promises of a new world, a new mind, a new way to be. I sought, never really knowing where it might all lead to. Perhaps what the mystics and yogis had said, had whispered about, was an inaccessible realm for only the chosen few. What I know now, though, is I had forgotten what had graced my spirit upon coming into the world.

It remains a mystery to me why it took as long as it did. Was it just that I had some very real-world lessons to learn first? Did the mundane trump the transcendent? While there have been answers, questions crowd them out in greater number than ever before. It’s as if in seeing the “iridjuel,” a transcendental object existing at the end of time only serves to deepen the mystery. That may just be the point and the way of things. For myself, I am surprisingly more content now with the motley crowding-in of questions over answers. It is a bit like how poetry is. It never seems to give you a solid answer, it teases you along with still-greater possibilities, a greater inescapable reality. Like poetry, maybe the whole point is to be inspired and not answered. Perhaps it is better to have an experience over answers. And yet, along the way, answers do come, but they come about through a very different process than before. These answers, though, lead to a more informed kind of mind and heart filled with greater humanity and kindness, perhaps a sensitivity that appeals to the Shakti in each of us. Fiery, alive, but gentle and sensitive to the needs of the All.

What is so interesting is how we all come to these in our own way. I’m not suggesting that it is the same, though. Many paths, many arrivals. The moment that I think that there is a hard and fast answer, a path that is clear, I see so many other paths that weave in and out of my own and down into parts of the forest that I had never considered before. What is clear though is I can see how there was a single substantive move from the laser-focus of the logical rational mind to that of another which was its opposite which led me to this shore and the end of time which is like Terence McKenna’s “iridjuel,” the transcendental object at the end of time.

Was it just as simple as activating the power of the more feminine side of our brain, that right hemisphere? So much of what I saw happening in meditation when the lights came on was about this shift. If it weren’t for how the meditation technique was designed, I might have missed it. It appeared first like a giant empty room. I had been there countless times before. I might have dismissed it that time, passed it by and gone on to more active pursuits. But I stayed. I gave it time. Instead of a focus, it was the opposite of what I knew was that laser-like focus which we all had grown accustomed to and comfortable with. It was a focus, but without the usual sense of focusing. It is, in short, precisely what the non-dual crowd calls “not doing.” It was the opposite of “the doer.” It was observing but it was not aware in the same way. It was as if my mind had been switched off and a giant seemingly endless expanse opened up. This I think is what so many call the “void” and many back away from it both in fear and unknowing. It was in that darkness that the brightest of pure white light flashed before me, subsumed me for just a moment before receding, after which everything began to change. You could say it was my “journey to Damascus” moment.

I stuck with this new form of observation without a single-point because I found it novel, a new challenge to my mind. Curiosity had the best of me. And maybe I had tried so many different ways before this that I kind of shrugged and thought, what’s the harm? It wasn’t that this void was really empty. In it phenomena would rise and fall based on how well I didn’t drag into it my old focus, that old comfortable and certain laser focus. It invited me to open, open, and open still more. The more I did, the more it would show me. I considered the possibility that the void was perhaps just a gulf between two selves, one of which was incomprehensible to the other. If the other side to this new form of “focus” was apprehending, then this was a very different acquisition altogether. I didn’t catch a bird, I observed it through its very essence, whatever the object of my interest was. A window opened in my forehead and I saw images from a great distance. A hallway, an apartment, the windows, the arrangement of the furniture, the bedrooms and other things. I was lucky, I knew the person to whom these scenes belonged….I just didn’t know it at the time. Coincidence or synchronicity saw to it that its import was made known to me and I was placed on that person’s path. I was able to see that for as fantastical all of this was, for as seemingly self-created it could appear, what that window revealed was in fact images from a world away. I corresponded with the person to whom these images belonged, who was able to tell me how correct or true those images were. It was as if I had caught onto something that had been hidden in a seeming void, images shelved behind darkness that might never have been found had I remained incurious and remaining in my old ways. It all seemed impossible, and yet there it was. Over and over I tested this seeming novel capacity, always with a high degree of accurate results. If this was mere imagination, there should have been results that reflected that reality and I would have seen more misses than bullseyes. Somehow, it was as if my mind could imagine what wasn’t there before and could show me what did exist through some unknown capacity opening up within me. And surely this is what happens when we open our minds in this way. Psychics often describe how they seem to lack the filter that keeps such access to this phenomenon at bay. While it isn’t that important to have these experiences, it nonetheless is a symptom, a sign, of the change that is taking place. It turns out that this is a universal symptom regardless of your religious belief or school of thought. The Christians have it as “gifts of the spirit” and the Hindu have it as “siddhi.” They all come from the same precise phenomenon but go by different names.

If the old way of being was achieved by way of a linear progression and its laser focus, then this was a compliment to it. It emerged seemingly as if it was a divine compliment, for surely it was just that. It looked and smelled and felt like the simplest of tricks, a simple key in the lock that turned the tumblers of time and everything else with it. Yet, holding a key or grasping a lock alone would lead to nothing. The world remained as it was; as appearances only. Both were impotent apart, but both were suddenly potent when brought together. Together they opened up secrets, the unknowable, the impossible, and yes it all seemed like a fantasy at first until I found that no, these were very real things that I was seeing. I didn’t see them from the outside, but rather I felt them from the inside out. Everything was in reverse. I considered that I was sick, perhaps suffering from some brain malfunction for about two weeks, that is, until I realized that no, there was a basis for what appeared completely implausable. This is perhaps why the concept of union over-arches this experience in all of its forms. Left brain and right brain, always out of sync, always putting out different frequencies, now line up and are on the same page. They then create a third mind, a meta mind, which then opens its window into the world beyond the senses. Like a ladder adding to itself, it leads us into a new way and a new world within ourselves. It is apt calling one side the masculine and the other the feminine, for that is surely how they seem. The one caveat is that regardless of whether you are male of female, we all have the same two present in us. Like the rails of a ladder, when we bring them together with the rungs, we are able to climb up into the transcendent, into what science says isn’t possible. It was in the practices of shifting into the other lost rail of the ladder of our mind that I found the way upward. But just as it showed me the way upward it also showed me that it also goes downward and into the realm of shadow where if we release those old ghosts of our fear, we can continue higher with fearlessness and wonder.

It has helped to show how all people matter, how it is that different turns of mind are important as we reach the end of time and its realm of appearances. It always seemed as simple as hitting a whole new gear. We just didn’t know that this gear even existed. So simple, so broad in its implications.

I began to see how, through time, just as we had subsumed the inner Shakti within ourselves, so too did we subsume the Shakti’s in the world. As above, so below. Was it ordained that it be this way? Or was it just inevitable given how we had limited ourselves? More, every once in a great while there would come some person who was a teacher who would pass on something that would yield a brief period, a kind of renaissance of spirit, whose words would fill a scroll or book and we would be left scratching our heads wondering what or how they got to where they were. Like a tide, knowing would come flowing in and then after a time, it would flow out, seemingly lost to human comprehension and the limits it had placed on itself. Always a teacher to light that fire, fanning the flames as best as he or she could. Over and over, we would fall back into forgetting. Not all of them would, but the most worldly of them had an amazingly short half life.

That is why this time seems a completely different iteration of past events. Waking up as we have, without a teacher or any knowledge of the secret practices of yogis or mystics, perhaps millions may have already reached this further shore. Will it make this iteration different? Will it last? Is it a new wrinkle whose very presence will change the pattern for all time, or will it be just another tidal phenomenon, subject to the larger forces present in our cosmos and thus our own bodies?

While the left brain says “Aha!” It is the right brain that brings the myths which tell truths that facts cannot. So Shakti dances in a wreath of fire and beckons us to her mystery. Perhaps this time we can see the two impulses as not mutually exclusive, but capable, when brought together, or forming a window into a larger understanding of what those two sides represent when brought into union. It is why I think that both, set apart, will only offer up what they think they know instead of a larger view of what is. It seems nature has a proclivity toward having us learn how to cooperate between our disparate inner nature if we are to reach the prize. And what is this prize? Is it a definite object that we can know in a concrete way, or is it instead both mystery and known quantity that mystifies as much as it informs? Is it the gift that reveals how important it is to see both sides of things, which pulls us along in our curious journey to discover what has not previously occurred to us? Is the answer as much how the meta mind is created as the object at the end of time is composed? And as such, will that object always defy our attempts at grasping it, but remain like a ball of wool, indistinct, random, but from which, with the pinch of our mind, can grasp a small part of its incomprehensible nature and spin it into a coherent thread? And will those threads always be just one small aspect of a still larger whole? I tend to think as much, but I also observe that anything that you might ever want to know can be found and teased out in just the way that I have described. This represents the exact opposite of how we are taught learning can take place….and yet the transcendental object at the end of time remains, enigmatic as ever, urging us forward into some new understanding of ourselves and the cosmos itself.

I might never have thought that this was possible had it not happened over and over to me. Had I been less prone to digging in and seeing how the fantastic seemingly self-imagined objects I saw behind closed eyes were, I might not have seen that they were supported through fact and independent experience. And it isn’t even that doing such a thing is that important, it is I think, a signpost along the way that we are now in new territory. It says: The Transcendental Object At the End of Time Up Ahead.

A hundred years hence what I have considered may itself be seen through the tunnel of time as only one small wrinkle in a still larger unfolding. And yet, still, I cannot help but grasp that bit of air with my mind and pinch with my intention to spin out threads of coherent thought and discovery from the object that seems surely to exist at the “end” of time.

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