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I miss the simplest things

stolen moments

This time

returns and fills me

emptying me again,

this rhythmic turning

of seasons.

Where does it go?

Where are you?

I close my eyes and sink into it.

What moves in my outer world

can give rise to an inner movement

a great ineffable sense of love moving beneath

around

near

between spaces

outside of space

and time.

It is here,

there,

and everywhere

that I miss you.

I miss your steady gaze

your bouncing gait

your infectious laughter.

I miss your quiet

which holds volumes

of things I just sink into

as if they were my own.

It is perhaps this way

when you share a common library of knowing

that exists

invisibly present

in the gathering warp and weft of our days.

I miss the common

the shared

the easy

and effortless

that has simply been…

like bedrock to puzzle me

why not a temple built here?

It makes me wonder why two

who are so common to the other

would be so separate….

except that  the great work

consumes us in the individual love

of care and healing of ourselves

so that we might be the empty vessels

ready for a larger love

yet….

and it’s not that I have that one pegged as certain

because it seems we ought to find a way to be

where small and big inform the other

without fearing the deep dark fathoms

we reach in this work….

but we do…

I know I do.

The worst is to think another might

abhor you just as you open the darkest recesses

of the place hidden even from yourself….

Our world lets go of its life that colored our hills green

now golden, red, ablaze and brown

then still

as all returns to sleep and dream.

I wander these hills

kicking up dry leaves

of lost summer eves and spring beginnings

into the air

and wonder

how you are

and think of that look you give me

that keeps me perpetually wondering.

In the silent climb

from one season to the other

as we each hurdle at millions of miles per hour

through space

interstellar travelers

here on earth,

specks of life on a larger speck of soil

a miracle in itself,

I think of you

and the spiraling way that life

and time creates before us

for us

in us

and wait for that moment when

the spiral begins pulling you closer

a mystery wrapped in deeper mystery

of what we are here doing

becoming

knowing

feeling

and wondering…

if summer meeting fall

will bring you near

outwardly

or inwardly

everpresently.

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